VI.

As I sat having my third cup of coffee and the rest of my po'boy, I tried not to be offended by Sara Weiss's poor opinion of my judgment. She was really torn by which was more foolish, the fact that I'd come to New Orleans at all or that once I was in New Orleans I was spending all hours of the night in a vampire compound. She was further puzzled because I had said I wanted to get away from 'these people' which in her mind was a generic term comprising all supes. She was trying to size me up and thought that I really didn't seem like a fangbanger type at all. I certainly didn't dress like one. Not even when I walked into that compound. She knew because she'd seen the photos of me walking in and walking out accompanied by two men who were probably vampires. I'd been under surveillance since the moment I landed in New Orleans. Manny had flagged my accounts to see exactly where I was and knew from the moment the standby ticket was paid where I'd been heading. She had the general impression that he was pretty upset, or at least worried, even though he had seemed very matter of fact about having me watched while in New Orleans. It was very clear, however, that Manny had not told her that I was 'married' and visiting my 'husband' and so she had decided that I must be into some seriously kinky stuff in my free time. Really, what I was into was more coffee, and coffee with chicory was simply not cutting it for me. I would have made jokes about feeling like death warmed over after spending the night in the vampire compound but I really didn't think she'd get it the way Pam or Amelia would.

"Is there a Starbucks or a Peet's near here? Someplace with regular coffee?" I asked her with a yawn.

"There's a Starbucks right over on Canal," she said.

I nodded gratefully. It would be my new favorite place if I continued to keep these hours on my vacation. In my everyday life I was usually a total morning person when I was at home in Virginia. I'd gone to sleep at the time I normally woke up and I was definitely feeling it.

"So Sara, is Manny going to just have you set up surveillance on me, or am I supposed to report in to you at regular intervals to prove I'm okay, or… what's the plan here?"

"I'm not at liberty to say right now. I guess that staying in contact would be a good idea. Did you know that there's a tall guy over there that's been watching us ever since you got here. He followed you in here, actually." She said the last casually, without looking up at me or over at her target.

I glanced over and saw a fairly tall, lean African-American man dressed in a t-shirt and khakis. When I stared at him he nodded to me and smiled. Likely Bennett Tucker, I thought to myself.

"I think he's watching me for one of my friends, Sara. Don't worry about it."

She glanced over at him furtively by using her camera on her phone. I heard her snap a picture of him.

"Why are your friends having you watched if they are your friends, Sasha?"

"Because one of my friends is a royal pain in the ass," I said with a grimace. Now there was a definite truth.

"So this guy is watching you for the vampires?"

"No he's watching me for a vampire. He's a police officer so don't worry about it. It's a long story that I don't have time to get into. So I'm just going to assume that I'm under your surveillance, okay? Sometimes I'm going to be in that compound and sometimes I'm going to be out doing stuff, like I want to go to Preservation to hear Nnenna Freelon, and go visit my former roommate and stuff like that. And at the end of my trip, I'm driving up to Red Ditch, in the north part of the state to see my deceased cousin's little boy."

"I don't think visiting more friends or family is wise. Your identity has been kept closely guarded and it has kept you safe, from the people that did… what they did to you. I think you should avoid people you know. I think you should be more cautious."

"I will be cautious, but I am going to Red Ditch to see my cousin's son at the end of my trip and I'm going to see a few friends I really trust. And I'm going to continue visiting to the vampire compound. I'm giving you the heads up that I'm probably going to spend the day there tomorrow, okay? Just so that you don't get caught off guard. I'll go around sunset and stay through tomorrow. I'll have the phone so if you get concerned you can just text me or email me. I'll keep you posted so that you know my plans."

"Who are you staying with there?"

"Manny knows. He'll tell you if he thinks you need the information." Clearly Manny was being very careful with the info about Eric. I felt a bit more comforted with that thought. I trusted Manny.

After a few more minutes of mutual cloak-and-dagger information hoarding she seemed to be satisfied that I really was fine. She said she'd be on her way, and I treated her to lunch. While I was waiting to pay, the gentleman who'd been watching me came over and introduced himself as Bennett Tucker. He showed me his badge and ID and asked if he could sit. I gestured that he could help himself to the seat vacated by Sara.

"Mr. Northman said that I should give you the list of people we're using. I'm not sure who's gonna be working at what hours yet but until sundown and maybe some evenings we'll be watching over you as needed, ma'am." He handed me a list of six other names with corresponding photos and cell phone numbers. I looked up at him shaking my head.

"Um, what exactly did Mr. Northman tell you about me, and about watching me, Sgt. Tucker?"

"Well, he told me we were to keep you safe from harm and he implied that you were… important to him."

I shook my head in amazement as I looked at the sheet he'd handed me. "Six people. You have six people assigned to watch me?"

"Well at any given time, it's likely to only be one or two. I make the seventh, if I'm available. I'm covering today because it's my day off. Mr. Northman said we had to keep a bit of a distance because you don't like people crowding you, and that we shouldn't be too obvious. But when you get in elevators and such, you should wait for at least one of us. You can call me when you're getting ready going to go out of the hotel."

"Did Mr. Northman inform you that I'm an FBI agent and that I'm armed?"

"Yes, ma'am, he did. He also told me that you wouldn't even ask for help if you needed it and so we should keep a pretty sharp eye on you."

"Did he tell you my FBI colleagues were keeping an eye on me, too?"

"Yes, ma'am. He sent me an email early this morning to that effect. Agent Weiss is one of them? I know her from a local investigation although I could see she didn't know me, or at least she didn't recognize me out of the uniform. But I'm following Mr. Northman's instructions to the letter. I'm sure their agenda is very different from mine."

"Do you have to report back to Mr. Northman?"

"Yes, ma'am. Yes I do." He looked a bit apprehensive about further questions on that point. So maybe there was more to it than Eric just wanting me to be safe, I wondered? Did he want to know what I was up to during the day? Where I went and whom I saw? Well, considering the previous night, I would be too tired to go anywhere or see anyone if we continued on the same tack. I'd have to say though, that it was a sacrifice I would be willing to make. I smiled to myself.

"Fine, Sgt. Tucker. I'm going to pay my bill and go back to my hotel and take a nap in my room, okay?"

He looked relieved that I was going to quit questioning him. I folded up the paper that he'd given me and put it in my purse. I reminded myself that the Eric everybody else was dealing with was the same one that had been furious with me early this morning because I questioned his decisions in public. It wasn't the Eric I was now used to, the one that could be gentle with me or playful or even tolerant of an argument. I was quite sure that Eric could be downright scary when you crossed him. I could imagine Bennett Tucker wouldn't be happy having to explain he lost me, or that I got hurt or that I was too difficult to keep up with.

I thought about walking over to Canal St. to get a coffee but decided what I really should do was go back and take a nap. It was a crowded Saturday in the Quarter. I was glad I was staying on the fringe of it.

I walked back toward Iberville St and saw Tucker casually following me. I didn't see anybody that looked like an agent but I knew few people from the New Orleans office. They could just follow my phone anyway. I turned on Iberville and walked a few blocks to the hotel. I let Tucker get into the elevator with me and we walked toward my room then thanked him and waved him away when we got to the door, which was open because the maid was cleaning the room. He refused to leave right away and got a good look at the maid and her ID, and the room to make sure it was all safe. I just sat in the armchair, wearily waiting for the maid to finish making the bed. I started reading Crime and Punishment and formed an immediate dislike for Raskolnikov, the main character. I thanked and tipped the maid when she indicated she was done, and locked the door after she left. I tried to read for a while but fell back to sleep after about an hour.

I awoke around 6 pm and took a quick shower and dressed. I packed my smaller bag with a change of clothes, makeup, toiletries and my toothbrush and toothpaste. And my gun, of course. Couldn't forego that… I locked the rest of the gear in the room's safe. I wrapped Eric's book in a scarf, to make sure I didn't damage the binding and cover. I went downstairs and over to Galatoire's to get something to eat at 7 pm. The streets were packed, although the restaurant wasn't too crowded yet. I got a few looks asking for a table on my own, but I ignored the maître d' and his sour attitude. I ordered a steak medium rare and grilled vegetables. Then I unwrapped my book and kept reading.

I really disliked Raskolnikov. Basically though, I was afraid there was a Raskolnikov in all of us. Justifying whatever we wanted to do with some skewed logic and sense of entitlement. It worried me that Eric liked this book. Or maybe it comforted me. I couldn't quite decide.

Around about 7:45 pm, before it was actually even sunset, I received a text message from Eric.

You are not in my bed.

I smiled, reading it. Well, I would be the next time he woke up. I texted that thought back to him.

I was drinking an espresso (thankfully a real one, without having been cut with chicory) while waiting for my check, when I received another.

I really meant the second thing.

I knew which thing he was saying he meant, but was still amazed at the mere suggestion. I texted back to him:

You hardly even know me. You haven't seen me for more than three years. That second thing is just plain crazy. Get a grip.

I reflected after I sent the text message that it probably wasn't exactly the most polished reply to a proposal of marriage. Either time. But, seriously, what on earth was the man thinking? He had to be kidding himself if he thought I could possibly take him seriously. But he replied...

I know you quite well. I know what I want. Not interested in wasting more time, frankly. I'm getting a grip and will not let go again. I assure you.

He knew me quite well? Did he ever reflect on the fact that I didn't know him all that well and might not cotton to making huge commitments to a man I might love but hadn't seen for years and knew only a bit about? We didn't even know if we could get along when spending a lot of time together. Sure he'd lived with me when he'd had amnesia but it was one week, years ago and half his entire personality was gone at the time. And I was an even more independent person now. I read the message a second time. He knew what he wanted? Well, I wasn't so sure he knew what he'd get. I didn't even know what to respond. That last bit in his message sounded a little unsettling, too. Moments later he texted to me,

Where are you? I thought you would be here soon. Tucker says you are not in the hotel room. He asked me for your number? You were not to go out without his people guarding you.

Oh my gosh! Tucker! I texted back that I was just down the street at Galatoire's and had forgotten to call Tucker. I hadn't even given Tucker a second thought when I'd left the hotel. I'd frankly completely forgotten about them. I just wasn't used to thinking that way. I started digging through my purse looking for the card Eric had given me before I left in the early morning and realized I'd left it in the hotel room.

Eric replied with a stern sounding message,

Do NOT leave where you are until he arrives. He will bring you here.

A few minutes later, Sgt. Tucker and another Were entered Galatoire's and made their way to my table. I felt really bad. I didn't want to imagine what telling Eric he'd already "lost me" was like, even if it was really my fault for not having called him. Bennett Tucker looked less than pleased with me. He introduced the other Were as Jamie. He looked familiar from the list I'd received at lunchtime. Sgt. Tucker appeared to send Eric a message as soon as they sat down. I was extremely apologetic and gave him my cell phone number, so that next time he could just call me and ask me where I was. I felt bad that I hadn't offered it to him before. Jamie looked at me quite curiously but was silent other than saying he was pleased to meet me. Tucker, however, still looked seriously chafed with me.

With a sigh, I finished my espresso, paid for my dinner and let them walk me toward the compound. I stopped and bought some fruit at a corner market, along with an energy bar, some peanut butter crackers and a bottle of water.

I said good night to Sgt. Tucker and Jamie at the side door to the compound and this evening Pradep would have let me enter with hand grenades and a small thermonuclear device. He waved me around the metal detector after greeting me with a bow. Pam had obviously gotten to him, too, I thought rather ruefully to myself, or at least someone had. After I passed by, I was met by Stefan, who also bowed, the side door was bolted and Pradep disappeared down the hall toward what I thought was likely the front entrance. Clearly no one else was expected to enter through the side entrance for the evening. Stefan led me toward the stairs, after taking my bags. Before we ascended I was puzzled to see several people shuttling around further down the hall. Human people, who did not look like visiting tourists. Did they live here? Were they live-in donors? I wasn't going to ask. At least I wasn't going to ask Stefan, anyway.

Stefan did not speak much as we walked up the stairs and led me up to the third floor rather than the second. I glanced at him and thought fleetingly to myself that it was uncanny how much he looked like Eric. It was 8:10 pm according to my watch, still pretty early in a vampire's evening. But he looked totally alert and ready for work. I wondered how old he was. When I mentioned as we got to the third floor landing that he really didn't have to do the bowing thing and that it made me uncomfortable he gave me an odd look but said nothing. He walked me around to the area where Eric's rooms were, knocked on the door and then merely nodded to me and left after putting down the bags.

Eric opened the door to the library room and smiled. I was so relieved he wasn't upset about the business with Tucker. He was dressed in a black robe and smelled like he had just showered. He took my bags hand and silently guided me back to the bedroom, which unlike the library, was totally dark. Putting down the luggage on the floor and the bag with food on the table, he quickly undressed me, scooped me up and lifted me onto his bed, took off his robe and crawled back into the bed and wrapped himself around me. I relaxed against him with a sigh. It was so still and dark. It sounded like it had started to rain outside. I closed my eyes and promptly fell asleep in his arms.

About 45 minutes later, Eric woke me up and said that we should get dressed because he had to work. He mentioned Bill would be arriving later. Before he finished dressing, I asked him if he wanted blood. He turned to me with a smile but no fangs. He seemed very pleased that I would offer.

"Later tonight. Just a taste perhaps. After all I had a fair amount yesterday. You ate well before you came? Can I have anything else prepared for you?"

I just shook my head. I thought about the number of vampires that probably lived in the compound and about how many people they might keep on hand living here to feed on. Those people downstairs for instance. The thought of it kind of creeped me out, in spite of knowing that it was just the simple reality. Any humans living here were, probably for the most part, food. The American Vampire League still maintained that vampires could live on True Blood, but I seriously doubted that any vampires did. I wondered if there was someone who prepared food for the donors who likely lived here downstairs. Seemed so, from Eric's offer. It was kind of chilling to think that on some level, I too, was food. I guess somehow Eric had managed to never make me feel that way.

Eric straightened out my blue blouse and kissed me. He was wearing a really nicely cut black suit with a pale green shirt and a dark tie with an asymmetric pattern. He started to tie his hair back as we spoke. I reached up and finished wrapping the band around his ponytail and then brushed the shoulders of his jacket smooth. He looked breathtakingly handsome to me.

"You look really nice. It's a very nice suit. Very well tailored. Do you always get so dressed up to see people now?" I asked. Eric had been the master of casual before. He smiled at the compliment.

"I'm talking business again this evening, so it makes a more serious impression. Some days it is more casual. Tonight is all business. Pam and Bill will keep you busy until I'm done. Probably not before 2 am, though. Do you have any clothes you wish to have washed or dry cleaned? You can put your things with mine while you're here visiting."

I shook my head no. Eric picked up his laundry basket and took it out of the room. I heard him open the door out to the hall and drop the basket outside. He came back into the room.

I brushed my hair and rifled through my cosmetics bag, looking for lipstick. When I put the bag down, Eric pounced on it and removed a bottle of medication. He looked at it and then said,

"What's this for?"

I glanced at it and frowned.

"They're sleeping pills. Sometimes I've had trouble sleeping and I was worried it could happen because I was back here," I said matter of factly.

He looked at me carefully and handed me back the bottle.

"Why do you have trouble sleeping?"

I just sort of stared at him for a second or two. Was he kidding?

"Um, first it was because of what happened, then because of what happened plus the depression about what happened, then all the anxiety about adjusting to my new life, the depression and the memories of what happened, and then all the shit I was reading from people's minds. Sometimes I still get bad episodes with Neave and Lochlan. I haven't in a while though."

Eric just stood looking at me but I felt this ache of sorrow from him, though he said nothing.

"I'm fine, Eric. Really, I'm fine."

"I thought these medications could be addictive."

"I haven't taken any in a long time. See the date on the bottle? And it's almost full." I handed the bottle back to him but he put it down without even really looking at it. "I just brought it in case being back in Louisiana caused... problems. I didn't even have any problems after you visited Virginia last month, so I guess things are finally getting better.

"You know, I thought of asking you, before you took off, if you would let me to glamour you into not remembering what happened so... intensely."

"I'd never do that," I said, looking him in the eye. He knew me better than that didn't he?

He looked down and nodded. "I thought you wouldn't. That's why I didn't ask. But I wanted to ask."

You didn't have much of a chance to ask, I thought to myself.

He was silent for a minute and then finally said,

"So it's what they did that was keeping you from sleeping?"

"In the beginning yes, it was just Neave and Lochlan and what they did to me. But then, over time it got to be other things too, like what they did to Tray or Breandan and his people killing Claudine and Clancy. And sometimes I'd have nightmares that they killed you, or that Bill died. It just got all rolled up into one. But I haven't had one in a long time. Probably not since Christmas. The holidays tend to be really hard, I guess because I feel more alone then or something. Rosie, you know my cat? she's a comfort. And usually when I travel I share with Alla, so if I have a really bad day, which means she had a bad one too, of course, it's not so likely to make me vulnerable because I have someone around. Alla's really great for that. She's very funny and can really help lift me when I feel low. It's hard though, because it's not like I could explain to anyone what happened. They, the FBI that is, wanted me to see a psychologist but it was impossible because of the telepathy. But I couldn't really talk about it anyway, after all. The telepathy was a really convenient excuse."

But suddenly I realized that I was talking about it all. Chattering almost. And Eric was sitting on the edge of the table, holding my hand while I did so. I realized that it had been three and half years and this was the most I had ever said to anyone about what had happened to me, other than perhaps my grandfather.

"You said you had to work and I'm keeping you," I said abruptly.

Eric stood up, nodding. He kissed my forehead but said nothing. I felt this faint, odd twisting of emotion and glanced over at him. He wasn't looking at me but I could see that what I'd said had really hit him somehow. But it was almost as if he wouldn't let me feel him or something. I didn't know what to make of it.

I took a deep breath as I bent down and grabbed the book out of my bag and unwound it from my scarf. Then I turned and smiled up at him.

"I was actually thinking I could just sit and read for a while. I'm almost a third of the way through the book. I'm afraid of Raskolnikov. At best, I'm telling myself that he's mentally ill. But I'm actually afraid everyone is like him in some way or another. It's a very scary book actually. It makes you think about how we justify our actions."

He smiled sadly as he looked down at me. But then the moment seemed to pass and his face lightened again.

He nodded. "That is the crux of why I like this book. The lies we tell ourselves and others to get what we want. Even the most evil person may lie to himself, and think he's doing right. Even in the face of much evidence to the contrary."

"Well, you certainly don' t have to sell me on the idea. Truth can be pretty relative in the world I work in."

"Truth is a little too relative everywhere, Lover."

He took my hand and we walked out into the library. Before he opened the door to go out, he turned to me and put his hand on my cheek and bent to kiss me gently. Then he said, "Time to be the big, mean vampire, Lover," he said with rueful smile. He straightened up and I actually felt this surge of focus in him.

We walked downstairs and he directed me toward another side of the building, in the general direction his office was in. We walked to the corner in the hall and he opened a door for me and ushered me inside. I found myself in a large office with butter yellow walls and elegant office furniture with rich tourmaline green and sapphire blue upholstery. The large window in the office was not blacked out and across a long sofa table in front of it were more than a dozen blooming orchids. Pam looked up from her computer and smiled at me. She was wearing a pink linen blouse and black linen slacks. She looked really lovely.

"What? I can finally have a Sookie moment? I am so fortunate. Finally, my friend. Some individuals are just so disinclined to let me share your company. It isn't prudent to name names, however."

"She's in your care Pam, and I will be busy until at least 2 am. Keep her on this side. I'll make sure they send Bill over here," Eric said soberly, ignoring her comments.

"You are certain you will not need assistance?" Pam said looking up and for a moment looking quite serious.

I sat down in an armchair with my book and glanced from Eric to Pam and back to Eric. Assistance? Assistance with what? I thought it was just a business meeting?

"It will be fine. Cadel is back. With Andor, Markus and Stefan that makes five of us. By the way Pam, she likes the Dostoyevsky. She gets the Dostoyevsky." He said this with a rather sardonic look on his face.

"She's finally had too much of your blood or something. You've probably instilled thoughts about what a great writer you think he is. Really, Sookie, you should be more cautious. Eric could glamour a rock," she said with a smile. "But I really thought you could resist him better. You're so adept at telling him no for all kinds of things, why not this?"

"Well, I'm not sure I'd say I like Dostoyevsky. That's kind of like saying that I like being slapped. At least with Crime and Punishment."

Eric laughed, then leaned over and kissed the top of my head. "Later, Lover. Pam… try to be reasonable. Make an effort."

She nodded, smiling quaintly with fangs down.

After Eric left, I asked "What's the deal with needing assistance with the meeting? I thought it was a business meeting? You made it sound like a fight."

"Well, it probably will be a fight. It is a business meeting with several vampires who have resisted paying their taxes in Area 2. There is still a bit of resistance to the new regime and we may need more corrective action. But it will all work out. You will meet Cadel. I guess you saw Stefan, Andor and Markus last night. Between five of them, only a fool would think they could start a fight and stand much chance of winning it. And of course, Eric so enjoys wielding a stake or a sword again. Now, that I don't have to be his right hand anymore, I have to say I almost miss…" she stopped suddenly and cringed.

I'd gasped and stiffened up in the chair. I looked away. This was the topic of my newest nightmares, only I didn't think I'd dump that on Eric. At least I'd had only two in five weeks. It was more than enough though.

She rose and walked swiftly over to me.

"I'm so sorry, Sookie. I didn't mean to be so flippant. I shouldn't have made mention of it again. You couldn't have known what happened. But really, it was, as things go, perhaps less radical than what might have happened. Eric and Bill were lucky they were so valuable. Few of us could have gotten away with what they did. They were lucky Felipe didn't kill them."

I looked up at her, almost in disbelief. This was her idea of comforting me? "That's just making me feel so much better Pam. I can't thank you enough. Would you like to slap me or maybe just open a vein?"

She looked at me quizzically and then said,

"Eric said you were very worried that Felipe would have punished Maxwell and me for having gone with him, too. That you even felt bad about Clancy. You and Clancy didn't even like each other."

"Well, I like Clancy even less being permanently dead, okay? He died because of me, Pam and how can I not feel bad about that? He didn't even want to be there fighting. I still feel bad about the whole thing. All of it. Everyone that died protecting me. People who got punished for protecting me. I'm glad you were okay. But I still just can't stand what happened. I really don't want to talk about it." My eyes started tearing up. At this rate my contact lenses were going to be unwearable soon.

Pam put her hand on my shoulder and squeezed gently.

"I still have some correspondence to work through. You can read while we await Bill. That book is just awful."

"But you can't dislike Sonya?" I said to Pam.

"Sonya would have made a great vampire," she replied with a smile, as she sat back down at her desk. "She's exactly the sort of person who ought to be turned. A good heart and a difficult life. She'd make a great vampire. She'd really appreciate the improvement in circumstances." She leaned around her computer monitor. "Not that I'm suggesting anything, mind you," she said with a chuckle. She started playing some classical music at low volume and I read as we awaited Bill's arrival.

Bill arrived around 11:30 pm and silently entered the room. I saw Pam look up and he smiled as soon as I turned to look at him. I rose and we each just stood looking at each other.

Pam asked Bill if he'd heard anything about what was going on over on 'the other side', a clear reference to Eric's little business meeting/fight.

"Well, according to Rasul two of them are already flaking." Bill saw the look on my face and laughed. "Don't worry, sweetheart. Not anyone you know."

Pam rose, and said,

"I'll leave you two here chatting and go see how things are. I really thought we should have started with a clean slate. There was simply nothing worth keeping in Baton Rouge."

Pam left and I walked over closer to Bill but not close enough to touch. He finally moved forward and kissed my cheek and patted my shoulder. Warm but slightly distant.

Finally, I said,

"I want to see it." I held out my hands.

His eyes softened. He placed his right hand in mine. I felt as if my whole face was imploding except for the tear that had already started streaking down my cheek. I swallowed hard and looked at his hand. He was shorter than Eric. About half a foot. So his hand was smaller. His skin looked less mottled than Eric's did. But I guessed that Bill as a human farmer had had much more sun exposure and skin that wasn't as pale as Eric's must have been as a human. Only something about his fingernails looked different. Not quite finished, I thought to myself. But subtle. Subtler than Eric's hand, with its pinker skin and nails and finger tips that were ever so slightly, to my eyes at least, shorter than those on the left hand.

I felt Bill's eyes on me and finally looked at him.

"There's really nothing that I can say Bill. No apologies or condolences or regrets that I can express that would convey how sorry I am. There are just no words." Tears ran down my cheeks then. I bit my lips hard as I looked at his hand.

"Sookie, it was the right thing to do. Never a question in my mind, no matter what the consequence. Eric told me how upset you were, but you never should doubt that I would have done it all over again. I'd have died to save you from those creatures.

I just nodded silently. He brushed the tears off my cheeks. And then motioned that we should sit down. I guessed I was looking kind of shaky.

"It's good to finally see you up close again, Sookie. You look well. You look like you healed very well. I am very glad.

"Eric told me that you were sometimes there in Alexandria for up to a week at a time. You never spoke to me, never tried come to see me? Why?"

"In the beginning because I was healing. It would have been difficult to explain the healing wound. It was not my place to contact you. You belong to someone else."

Belonged to someone else? Not his place? He'd risked his life for mine. I looked at him and shook my head.

"So Eric made you find me but told you to stay away from me?" In a way I guess it was better because I really might have taken off yet again, with the FBI's help. But still, it seemed... controlling to say the least.

"He told me you married him, Sookie. I offered to look for you. His position was… tenuous, making it difficult for him to go look for you at that point. Plus, we didn't want to put you in more danger when I actually found you. He didn't have to tell me to stay away from you. It wasn't appropriate for me to contact you. You're his. He was the one that should speak to you about returning, not me."

"Did he tell you that we were married before or after you almost got yourself killed for keeps by saving my skin and losing your hand a result. Did he tell you before Bill?" I left out the part about my not knowing I was agreed to be married.

"It wouldn't have mattered. I'd have done the same thing either way, Sookie. It was one of the few things I've done right since I'd met you. It was my fault I couldn't win you back. Not yours. Not Eric's. I can admit it. I did everything wrong. Both in getting you and losing you. Can you actually think I wouldn't have gone with Niall to rescue you just because you loved someone else? Do you think that you could rescue me from Lorena after I betrayed your affection for me but I wouldn't do the same for you when you were free to be with whomever you pleased? Am I really sunk so low in your opinion, even now?"

I cringed a bit at that thought. "No. Of course not, Bill. Of course not."

We were silent for several minutes and then finally I said,

"So tell me about home, about Bon Temps. How are you, how is Sam. How is everyone?"

His face relaxed and he began to tell me all about the current goings on in Bon Temps. About Sam, Calvin and Tanya, who'd married two years ago, and Tara and JB who had two children now, a little girl and a newborn baby boy. Sam was well and seeing a were. The restaurant was doing well, Bill said. Caroline Bellefleur had finally passed and Portia was now mistress of the Bellefleur mansion, which looked better than ever thanks to Bill's covert assistance. Bud Dearborn had retired. Andy Bellefleur and Halleigh had a little boy. Holly and Hoyt were married.

"How is Jason?" I asked finally.

Bill looked down as if thinking carefully about how much to tell me.

"He is not well, Sookie. I think he was very affected by your abrupt departure. I realize that you may not be ready to see him on this trip but it might be a good idea to plan to see him the next time you come. I have assured him I know for a fact that you are still alive. That improved things a bit. But, of course, I could give him no real information. Sometimes I think he's basically an alcoholic, Sookie. He's an unhappy man. That's not your fault but I think he would be improved by seeing you, having contact with you. Maybe the next time you come, I can come down with Jason and with Sam, too. If that is alright with you, of course. Sam asked Eric directly if he knew where you were, and Eric finally told him that we did but wouldn't be able to provide him with any information. That was about nine months ago. I think he would like to see for himself that you are alright. Sam was very, very concerned when you disappeared. We all were, until I talked to that agent."

I hesitated. "Bill, did you really glamour her? Pam said you did. Is that how you found out where I was?"

"I did glamour her, yes I did. She didn't know exactly where you were, only in Virginia. There aren't a lot of FBI facilities in Virginia so it was just a matter of narrowing them down and passing around your photo. Although the change in your appearance slowed down my progress for a while, since I wasn't able to watch you directly myself during the day. I kept describing you as the curvy blonde and no one I hired ever saw a blonde who met the description. You lost weight, changed your hair. Even your eyes looked wrong. It was only by chance that I saw you myself in Falls Church, out at night with that Arab guy. I recognized you right away. But then I was worried I'd have to tell Eric that you were dating someone," he said shaking his head.

"You mean Ahmed? Yeah, he and I would go out for dinner sometimes after Alla had gone home for the night. She's married and would go home to Springfield every night. That must have been right before we left for Guantánamo. The unit was still based in Falls Church then."

Bill chuckled. "I followed him for a while before I caught on. He's extremely discreet. The same with the dance partner, though he was less discreet. I kept thinking that I'd have to give Eric bad news." He shook his head and looked at me with a sad smile.

I didn't say anything. Ahmed was very discreet. His business was his alone in my book. Even though Alla and I did girl stuff together, she had less time because of her family. Ahmed was probably the best friend I had in Virginia. And certainly my business was my own, as well.

Bill seemed curious about my lack of response. I shrugged at his questioning expression. We were quiet for a while. Then, completely out of the blue, Bill said,

"I never should have taken you to Fangtasia. Of course, he would have gotten you anyway. Sophie-Anne would still have been displaying you like the prized asset that you were but Eric still would have gotten you. You would have intrigued him no matter what." He was quiet again, as if mulling something over. Finally he said, "I should have told you the truth, Sookie. About Sophie-Anne and about Lorena. I didn't know how to make things right. I should have just told you the truth."

I looked away, remembering those days. I didn't really care about Bill's revelations of his mistakes. And I was not crazy about being a prized asset. It was ancient history and he'd never really been happy with me. There were things about my being human that Bill hadn't liked. It was odd actually, since he was so much closer, time-wise, to his having lived a human life. Yet Eric, so many centuries older, seemed not to be bothered by so many things about my being human that had bothered Bill. Bill hadn't really wanted me badly until I was long gone, I thought to myself. But he wasn't a bad man, and I was sure he was in a difficult position because of his secret job for Sophie-Anne and doing that job right under Eric's nose. Sophie-Anne had been clever working around Eric where I was concerned. I looked back and remembered elegant Sophie-Anne and her sad fate after a millennium of surviving. I had always liked her, in spite of her little mission for Bill. Done in by the Fellowship, and her own kind. I was glad Felipe was gone. Between what he'd done to Sophie-Anne, and to Eric, Bill and Maxwell, I had no qualms in thinking that he deserved to be permanently dead, at least in my mind. But I worried about Eric and how safe he was from a similar fate.

"Bill, Pam says that you do security stuff for Louisiana, right?"

He looked surprised at the question.

"Yes, I do. Why?"

"It isn't safe here. No matter what there is behind the scenes- magic, spies, whatever. It isn't safe. Really, you need to get Eric to do something to improve the security in the building, both at the entrances and within the office section. I'm sure he can afford to be more secure."

He looked puzzled.

"I got in with all kinds of silver weaponry. Bullets, knives. It isn't safe here. For any of them."

Bill nodded and said, "I'll look into it."

I wasn't convinced he would. Or that he'd be forceful enough about it to convince Eric.

We were interrupted from talking about the matter further by Pam, who came back in bristling, shutting the door behind her a little too loudly.

Bill looked up and said, "Problems?"

Pam glanced at me, but went ahead and said a bit obliquely,

"Eric is entirely too tolerant of dissent. He only killed three of them. Or at least Markus and Andor did. Andor has just gone to change his clothes. I really think Eric needs a heavier hand."

Bill, cautious because of my presence, said only,

"He may earn more loyalty this way. Give it a chance."

She took out a thick file from a drawer and slammed it down on her desk.

"Chance, my eye. I'd get rid of the whole lot of them. It's a waste of time."

Moments later, Eric waltzed in. His tie was loosened around his neck but he looked unruffled, otherwise. No bloodstains on the suit, either. He came to where I was sitting and bent to kiss me, then stood with his hand on my shoulder.

"Bill Compton, how are you? How do you find, Sookie?"

Bill had risen and bowed his head low.

"I am fine, thank you, Eric. Thank you for allowing me to visit."

Geeeeeeez, I thought to myself. Nice that he's allowed to visit me. Sometimes I really thought I didn't quite comprehend the amount of power that Eric held over those around him, even now when it should be obvious to me. I felt his hand on my shoulder, clearly signifying to whom I belonged. I realized however that even if Eric was stating that I was his, very unsubtly, I didn't feel like I was chattel, as if I was an asset. I reached up and put my hand on his hand.

With a quick glance at Pam, Bill said with a wink at Eric, "Pam is so wrong. I agree with you."

Pam started slamming stuff on her desk and said,

"I hope she makes it black next. And I hope she makes her eyes brown. It would be richly deserved."

I looked at Pam's petulant expression and just laughed. What was the deal with my hair and eyes? Eric gave her a dark look and she resumed typing furiously. Bill laughed at her.

Eric offered me his hand and then pulled me to my feet, directing me to sit with him on the couch. Bill sat down in the chair I'd left and the four of us chatted late into the night. He was heading back to Bon Temps the next evening at sunset, but we had a great time chatting and reminiscing. It was good to know that we had finally arrived at a point where Bill and I could be friends. I was glad of it. I owed him my life, so the least I could give him was my friendship.