XII.

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.

- Robert Frost, The Road Not Taken, 1920

The first week in Louisiana had passed and the second seemed to go even more swiftly. I went out during the day in the second week. Eric seemed to want to really counter Pam's jibes that I was like a virtual captive in his grasp. He seemed very determined to make me feel that I had a sense of freedom. At his insistence, I went out to spent time with Amelia and Bertram (who was part fae but not part fairy, something I'd yet to quite absorb), and on another occasion went to Octavia and Louis's home, with Amelia and Bertram, for the afternoon and then dinner. The day security staff at the compound was at least inspiring a bit more confidence in me. They were pretty careful and some of them were kind of frightening. I met Diantha's father, for instance. I felt safer going in and out of the compound knowing that the security was tight. Bennett Tucker's Weres would escort me around and stay nearby while I visited. Sara Weiss was not thrilled with my contact with people from my former life but I was sure that my identity was safe with vampires, witches and sorcerers. And really, who was left of the people I'd be afraid to find me? Felipe, Victor and Dermot were dead and gone. Actually, I was most concerned about the gravity of trust that Eric placed in me. I was the only person with the codes to enter his rooms other than Pam. Eric said that because he'd sired Pam and was bound to me that if something happened to us to try to get us to force us to gain entry into his quarters he'd likely know it. But to me, there was the huge difference in that I was out during the day. I knew firsthand how hard it was to rouse him during the day. He said firmly that he didn't think there would ever be reason to be concerned.

We went to hear more jazz, went out with friends on a riverboat, and the days just seemed to roll by. On the 26th I met with Mr. Cataliades and signed a will and a trust for Hunter, with Eric as executor of the trust. I'd paid off the mortgage that Jason had taken out on our parents' home. I'd set aside money for capital improvements to the Stackhouse home and for Jason's as well, in addition to a nest egg for Jason. Bill was going to help me make arrangements to have repair work, fresh painting and other renovation work done on my home. Then I bought out Sam's business loan though he refused it as a gift. I'd offered him a much lower rate or just owning a share of Merlotte's. He surprised me, deciding after he told me he had finally forgiven me for taking off without a word, that he wanted me to be a part owner in Merlotte's. It was less than a fifth share, but it left him pretty much debt free other than his revolving expenses. He was just thrilled and said he hoped I'd visit regularly to check on my investment. The afternoon I spoke to him, he told me that he had seen Jason at lunch and that Jason was happier than he had been in years. He attributed it to the fact that, after apologizing profusely to him for my having taken off the way I did, I'd told Jason that I'd be in New Orleans again July 17th through the 26th and that I wanted to have him visit on that first weekend, my treat for the hotel. They were going to share the room, while Bill stayed in the compound with us. I'd promised Jason I'd try to stay in touch more.

Meanwhile, Mr. Cataliades was aghast at a six figure stock donation to Amnesty International that I made as an anonymous donor. I could tell once he found out that I was really serious about giving away a good fraction of the inheritance to charitable organizations that he was ready to rip up any potential prenuptial agreement and tell Eric he ought to do something to better control me. Mr. C. clearly did not believe in giving money away, or think my grandfather would have either. However, it made no matter to me. I firmly told Mr. C. that I had plans for that money and that it was going to be put to good use. My great grandfather had left it to me and I'd do what I thought was best with it. I told Mr. C and Eric that I was going to talk to Ahmed, who did a lot of charitable giving in Afghanistan and Pakistan, before contributing there. In the end, as he was leaving, he remarked that I was a very odd human. I reminded him that I was an eighth fairy and that fairies could be mighty unpredictable. He smiled down at me and shook his head. I was pretty sure he thought I was crazy and fiscally irresponsible.

Eric was not certainly not happy that I was leaving at dawn on the morning of the 27th to drive up to Red Ditch to see Hunter and Remy. He'd originally thought I was going back to Virginia on the 27th, but I'd explained about my plans to visit Hunter a few days after I'd been staying with him. He didn't seem thrilled with the idea of sharing my available vacation time with someone who lived five hours away but kept it to himself since he know I was visiting Hadley's son. Maybe part of his unhappiness about my trip was also that, two days before I left for Red Ditch, he'd asked me again about getting married and I told him, more nicely this time, that I couldn't envision doing that right now. I frankly couldn't even believe that he was asking again. That he'd been serious. He didn't exactly seem surprised I said no, but he seemed firm when he told me that we really were going to get legally married, no matter what I thought about the improbability of the idea and even if I wasn't ready to move back to Louisiana. I just held his hand, rested my head on his shoulder and didn't reply further. Frankly, after the whole thing with the bond, I really wasn't counting Eric out on the idea. Eric was almost frighteningly skillful at getting his way. But he wasn't going to get any more from me unless I was ready and willing. It was enough already just to be adjusting to the past seven weeks and be dealing with my job situation.

Eric asked Jamie, the Were who worked with Bennett Tucker at NOLA PD, to travel with me to Red Ditch. Jamie actually drove, since daytime travel was a pretty much a complete reversal of my waking schedule after two weeks with Eric. I'd stayed an extra half-day in New Orleans in order to be able to wake next to Eric that Friday night, and stay with him until dawn on Saturday morning. I was going to be back by the afternoon of the 29th, spend the night in the compound and then fly back to Virginia on the morning of the 30th. The drive to Red Ditch took about 5 hours from New Orleans. Jamie told me to just sleep, and I took him up on the offer. He seemed quite earnest in his determination to keep me safe after speaking privately with Eric about my trip. I didn't even want to imagine what Eric told him…

Remy Savoy had not been too friendly when I had called him the week before. I guess he thought I was every bit as flaky as Hadley had been. But he said that Hunter was waiting to see me and seemed to convey a sense to me that Hunter had in fact, even been expecting me. I thought it was a little odd, but just made my plans and showed up on Saturday afternoon. As the car was put into 'park' Hunter whipped open the front door and stood in the doorway beaming.

Hunter was now eight and a half years old. He looked mostly like a regular eight year old boy, unless you looked at him closely. His eyes looked guarded and old. I recalled the same guarded, 'seen too much' expression, from my own life at the same age, in the year that followed my parents' deaths. He was definitely Hadley's child, with his dark hair and dark eyes. He was really such a handsome child. That touch of fairy blood was evident in his graceful and attractive appearance. He looked with curiosity at Jamie and I could see that he could tell right away that he was a Were. He quickly hugged me and then took my hand, giving a long glance back at Remy who nodded hello. Hunter pulled me around to the back yard and sat in a swing. I pushed him, while he dangled his legs and seemed to enjoy the rush of air and the sunlight on his face.

So, Aunt Sookie. I can call you Aunt Sookie, right? You're like an Aunt, really.

Sure, you can.

So things are almost all better now, right? You're almost better from when they hurt you?

I froze. I had thought of Hunter that night, but had tried to rein it in and not think about him. He was only four going on five then.

They who, Hunter?

The mean fairy people. The bad ones that hurt you. The ones our grandfather killed with your friend? You're much better now, right?

I stopped pushing him and walked around in front of him.

Hunter, how do you know about this?

I… see things. I saw it. Not when it happened, but when Daddy couldn't talk to you he called your brother. That's when we found out you went away. I tried to see what happened to make you leave. Daddy said you ran away. But you just had to go away to get well again. They did very bad things to you. But now you're better. I can tell you are.

I crossed my arms across my chest and tried not to be too alarmed as I took a deep breath.

You saw what happened? You saw I had to leave?

I hear things, like now. And I see things, too. I saw what they did to you. They hurt you with knives and with their shiny teeth. I'm glad they are dead. They were very bad. I had nightmares about it sometimes, but not so much anymore.

I swallowed hard and tried to stay calm as I absorbed this information. He had nightmares about it but not anymore? I was really hoping I was misunderstanding him somehow.

What do you see? You see past things? Things going on now?

He stopped himself by dragging his feet on the ground beneath him and looked at me.

I see all kinds of things. Past things. Things now, like you and Eric. Future things. Sometimes I don't like the things I see. Like when you got so hurt. But at least I knew you were okay now. But you have to be careful. You have to be really careful so that you come back okay from your work. Your work is getting dangerous now.

He looked very serious as he said this last part to me.

I swallowed hard. He knew about Eric? He knew about the fairies? He was telling me to be careful at work…

But I think it will be okay. Because I can see things from when you come back.

When I come back from where?

When you move back home. Things will be okay when you move back home.

He smiled.

Finally I was just on overload. I started talking the regular way.

"Hunter, are you saying that you can see things from the future? Are you sure? Not just wishful thinking things, or hopes, or plans. But things that then really happen? Not things you can make happen, but things that have nothing to do with you, that you see and then have happened?"

Like car accidents or people getting hurt on the monkey bars at school the week before it happens? Or me coming to live with you? Yeah. I see those kinds of things.

I tried to guard my thoughts while I thought about the last part, thinking that he must be so lonely. He didn't even have a sibling, like I'd had Jason. It had to be wishful thinking on his part that he would come to live with me.

No. I really do. It doesn't happen for a while. Until I'm almost thirteen. That's when we all decide it's for the best. Daddy doesn't like my seeing things. It will be for the best. You understand me better.

I tried to be careful, as I asked,

What's for the best?

Living with you in New Orleans. I saw it last year at Christmas. I saw it when I was looking at the ornament you sent me when I was little. I live with you in the big building and I go to a private school. Newman something. By then my seeing things will really be something Daddy doesn't like, but it will be really useful for us, Aunt Sookie.

I shook my head, worried.

No, Hunter. A child is not 'useful'. It is not your place to be 'useful'. You're a child, and still will be a child, even when you're bigger and thirteen. You're not supposed be 'useful' other than doing chores around the house and getting good grades.

He smiled and said out loud,

"I like you, Aunt Sookie. I'll be really safe with you."

He got off the swing and, almost shyly, moved toward me and put his arms around my waist and rested his head against my chest. I tried to be very careful with my thoughts because he was so alone. I didn't want to do anything to make him feel that more keenly.

How many people know about this, Hunter?

Only you and Daddy. Daddy says I am not supposed to tell anyone at all, but I told him you would know because you are almost like me.

Almost like you because I can hear thoughts, you mean?

Yes, but you don't see things. Seeing things is bad sometimes. I see things I don't like. Like what happened to you. Or accidents. Or bad things I don't understand. Sometimes I see good things, though. Like living with you. But don't worry about it now. You will keep me safe. You can go ahead and pretend it isn't real for a while. That's what I do. I pretend. But it will all work out. I know it will. I saw it.

He paused for a second and said,

You want a popsicle? It's really hot outside. I've got grape and it will turn your tongue purple.

We went inside and got popsicles and then sat out on the deck in back in case they dripped. Jamie was off in the shade in a lounge chair listening to an mp3 player and looking at some auto magazines. He'd glance up to keep an eye on me every once in a while.

Hunter's feet didn't even reach the ground from the chair and the plastic chair made a squeaking sound as he swung his legs back and forth. He slurped on his popsicle.

Remy sat next to him and looked at me with a cold stare.

"Who's the guy?" Remy asked me.

"A friend," I said simply.

"He's supposed to watch her for her boyfriend," said Hunter, glancing over at Jamie with narrow eyes. Daddy won't understand about Eric. Daddy thinks vampires are bad because of my mom. Don't tell him too much. Don't tell him you are going to marry a vampire yet. Even though really, I guess you're already married, right? I don't understand that part. I mean are you really married? It's kind of confusing, Aunt Sookie.

Well, that made two of us being confused, and I wasn't just confused about how to describe my relationship to Eric to people. I paused trying to regroup. I hadn't known that many children, but I was very sure that Hunter was not like any eight year old that I'd ever known, not even like me at that age. The complexity of what he perceived and understood seemed almost astonishing. Was he seeing future things and the overlay of my own confusion about where things were with Eric now? Did he really see me marrying Eric?

Okay. I understand. I didn't really think I did, but...

"So?" Remy asked.

I like Eric. I think he's very nice to you. He teases you. He's nice. For a vampire.

Hunter, would you keep your nose out of my business, thank you.

Hunter giggled out loud. His lips and tongue were now totally purple. He grinned at me.

"So?" Remy asked again.

"What," I shrugged.

"What do you think?"

I hesitated.

"I think you need to be careful."

"Hell, yes, we need to be careful. I'd home school him if I didn't have to work."

"No, that would be a bad idea, Remy. If he wasn't with other people all day, when he did go out, it would be incapacitating. He needs to stay with people around him. He really needs to. He needs to learn how to show good judgment and when to filter people's thoughts out of his mind. I'll talk to him about it."

"What about the other stuff?"

Daddy doesn't like it. He thinks it's freaky. That's what he says in his mind.

I shuddered. I remembered my parents thinking things like that. I shifted my gaze again over toward Jamie. He was moving slightly to the beat of music. He glanced up and nodded at me. I figured he probably couldn't hear anything we were saying at a distance, what with the music, even though Weres had superacute hearing. I scanned him. His mind was absorbed with engine performance. That was all I could read from him.

"What do you think about the other stuff?" I asked Remy. I was curious to see what his impression was. I didn't want to annoy Hunter by thinking of him as just a fanciful child, but I wondered if from Remy's perspective if what Hunter said he saw from the future came true. It occurred to me that it was just possible that Hunter could be reading what happened to me directly from me, I told myself. And the same about Eric and my job. But Remy put an end to that little idea.

"I think it's some seriously scary shit, if you'll excuse my language. Whenever he gets like that I'm almost afraid to listen. And it happens just as he says it will. Is your brother like this, too? Like you? Like Hunter? I didn't know, so I didn't want to ask him any questions."

"No, Jason is not. You were right to say nothing. I think you need to be really careful, Remy. I think if you aren't, that things could go badly."

I tried to really rein in my thoughts on the subject, but it made no difference. Hunter was like a little roto-rooter.

I know some people would think I could be really useful. They could steal me. But bad people won't get me if I'm with you. Maybe Eric will help you protect me. He protected you. Actually, I'm sure he will protect me too, for you. Plus, he'll think I'm useful. But, not in a bad way.

Not in a bad way? What good way could there be, where a child was concerned? Currently, Aunt Sookie was feeling pretty damn shaky on the whole deal. I tried not to think of all the people that had been looking at me like an asset for the past five years and place that same mindset in the vicinity of an eight year old child. I tried even to push Eric to the very back of my mind so Hunter couldn't latch on to those thoughts, either. Because I seriously wondered if even Eric would be unable to resist the temptation of an eight year old psychic child being a very 'useful' asset.

In the late afternoon, I played Monopoly with Hunter, Remy and Jamie. We made spaghetti with meat sauce and garlic bread for dinner. I played some more with Hunter and then he went to bed. Hunter had become very skilled at covering his telepathy because Jamie hadn't noticed a thing during the afternoon and evening. Since Jamie had clearly been instructed not to leave me alone at all, it made it a little awkward for Remy and me to talk that night. Jamie went back to his mp3 player and magazines and I could hear the heavy metal sound leaking from his headphones. Remy and I sat in the kitchen and chatted over tea for a while, but it was really more of the same. He really thought that Stackhouse genes were disastrous. They made you hear things you shouldn't, sometimes see things you shouldn't, and evidently they increased your chances of taking off in a totally irresponsible fashion like Hadley and I did.

I slept in the top bunk bed above Hunter and Jamie slept on the living room couch. After so many days in New Orleans it felt odd to go to sleep when it was still so early, and odder still not to be next to Eric while I slept.

On Sunday morning we made cinnamon apple pancakes for breakfast. Hunter and I went for a walk while Jamie trailed behind. I talked to Hunter about school and about friends and the lack of them. Our experiences were fairly similar. He was a lonely child, though, without even a sibling to play with. Plus, I'd had Tara, who didn't care if I was weird because she was dealing with all her own life stuff and didn't have to explain a thing of it to me. He liked to read and was starting to read Harry Potter. He had seen the movies and thought it was funny that the Harry Potter story had a werewolf, but no vampires so far. He hated having to look up words he didn't know and there were a lot of those words in Harry Potter. I told him I could get him the books on CD so he could listen and maybe catch the meaning of the new words by their context and he seemed happy with that idea.

Then came the hard part. Walking along the old railroad tracks near Remy's home, I held his hand while he balanced on the rail. I told him I didn't think I should come to see him too often because I didn't want to attract attention to him. I wasn't sure an eight year old could really understand that, or understand why. Since Remy didn't have a computer, I had decided one of the first things I was going to do was get them one, and make sure that we could Skype if we changed email addresses frequently, since I didn't want Hunter calling me on my work cell phone and discussing stuff with me. I figured that Hunter and I could stay in touch once in a while that way. To my surprise he seemed to pretty much understand it.

You know I'm not being mean, right?

It's only for a while, Aunt Sookie. You'll be back pretty soon.

I decided I really didn't want to ask what he saw…

How about another a popsicle? I asked him.

Since Hunter had school the next day, I decided it was better for him to settle back into his routine after my visit. Jamie and I drove back to New Orleans after dinner. Eric was really pleased that I came back earlier than I'd planned. But he easily picked up on the fact that there was something preoccupying me. Between worrying about Hunter and feeling so oddly conflicted about going back to Virginia and what might await me there, I was pretty distant and brooding. He somehow managed not to badger me on any of it. He was busy with his work but it seemed like he understood my melancholy. I knew he had his own.

On Monday night, after I was all packed to leave the following morning, I sat on the couch in Eric's office reading. I didn't know whether it was Hunter's words to me, or some sense of my own but I felt like I was moving toward a fork in the road. As I looked at Eric's head bent over a pile of documents on his desk, I knew which way I was going. Regardless of when I got there, and irrespective of all my worst internal fears. I couldn't envision not having Eric in my life anymore. He'd managed to work some sort of magic on me and I didn't think it had anything to do with any bond. It had more to do with love and trust. Even though I hadn't asked Hunter when, and I knew it would be a while, part of me knew I was coming back to New Orleans for more than just weeklong visits. I was comforted by the idea that things would just work out. In the meantime, I felt like I still had work to do. Within myself, in part, but also with my actual job.

After an emotionally difficult departure from New Orleans at dawn on Tuesday, I was picked up by the 'Royal Transportation Service', as Ahmed's goofy sign said, at Reagan National, and was home with my Rosie Cat by 4:30 pm, in an apartment filled with four dozen red roses and birthday wishes from Eric and Pam for my thirtieth birthday, which was the following day, July 1. Ben left a note saying that he hoped I'd be more accepting about this little intrusion compared to the last ones, since I'd really told him off after Eric had left Virginia back in May. He was supposed to take care of Rosie and that was it, I'd told him in May. Meanwhile, as we drove back to Alexandria from the airport, I told Ahmed about Eric and my vacation. He helped me carry my things upstairs and sat listening to it all in complete silence. I didn't get into all of the details of how I had ended up in the FBI but he got the gist of it. He was simply incredulous. He asked me to see a photo of Eric and I showed him the only one I had currently, which was in my phone. I thought to myself with a chuckle that it was really a shame that his Mr. January outtake was somewhere back in my bedroom in Bon Temps, because Ahmed probably would have enjoyed it. He didn't comment much about any of it and when he left I had the impression I'd really given him a shock.

I was out dancing with Sammy by 8:30 pm and back at work in the morning by 8 am. I still seemed to have a job. The copy of Teach Yourself Swedish waiting on my desk was not annotated, but was an inspired birthday gift, as I told Ahmed. It was also a sign of support. We went out for lunch and in the middle of talking about possible upcoming work, he asked me if being bitten hurt. Talk about non-sequitors. That night I was not glamoured by two NSA vampires who told Chuck Powell that I was the famous Louisiana telepath who had talked back to a really ancient vampire at the Rhodes summit several years back and that lots of vampires knew of me and that oh yeah, by the way, I couldn't be glamoured. The NSA vampires were disguised so that I couldn't tell anyone who they really were. Manny was thrilled. Chuck Powell looked almost as if he was disappointed. He was not happy about my stint in Louisiana at all. He didn't like me and now thought I'd lied about my past and fleeced them to get away from a bad marriage or something. Chuck was not the same kind of guy that Manny was in my mind. Not at all. As I sat there at the table with him, I was more certain than ever that there were still enhanced interrogation techniques that were covertly in use. But he conceded to Manny that his predictions were not borne out. There appeared to be no direct risk of information leakage from my being emotionally involved with a vampire. I told Manny that I seriously hoped that they would leave Eric alone and further told him that I would quit if they didn't. Manny tried to reassure me on the topic of anyone going after Eric and told me that Chuck knew he'd be playing with fire on that one.

Work was brisk in July. Ahmed and I went to Iraq for two days after my birthday. The second week of July we interviewed a suspected Al Qaeda terrorist in Turkey who had been making calls to several people back in the US. Then we headed to Madrid and spent two days interviewing a couple of suspects for the Spanish government. After working, we had a great time in Madrid at night, although it was unbearably hot even at night. Around the middle of the month, Alla came in Quantico several times to look at transcripts and listen to some wiretap recordings that were in Farsi. I visited Alla and Mercan at home, with their darling Alexander. Ahmed and I went sailing without them since they were worried about taking the baby out too soon. I danced, and went to book club and adhered to all my usual routines when I was home. But just as I had predicted, I felt like I was living in a world that was in black and white and shades of gray. The rich colors of New Orleans and that other part of my life were just unmatched. Eric and I still skyped daily, many times twice a day, even when I was in Europe. I missed him terribly and often found myself brooding. I was glad when the third week of July arrived. We had a genuinely happy and relaxed visit this time. Eric joked that all the heavy lifting had been done in June. I had a happy visit with Jason and with Sam. Bill was on hand, too. I went out of the compound several afternoons to see Amelia, Bertram, Octavia and Louis. Going out made me realize how much I craved the daytime when I was with Eric, though. I wondered what it would be like for a human to really live in the compound on the third floor, which was so dark. Meanwhile, Eric wasn't very happy when, in spite of the fact that I would admit I missed him terribly when I was in Virginia, he asked again and I still said no. I told him I thought the idea of getting married when I lived in another state was just plain foolish. He was oversensitive about my continuing to refer to Virginia as 'home' when conversing with others.

In August I went to Pakistan and Afghanistan on longer trips. We were interviewing many captured Taliban fighters these days. The nine and a half to eleven hour time differences made skyping Eric a challenge. Eric was edgy the entire time I was gone because some days I had no internet access at all. He was not alone with the edginess. I had a temporary interpreter for Pashto but on one occasion he made a mistake translating something and there was a huge mess because I was absolutely sure he was wrong about what he told me. I had to end up using a local interpreter, which was always more dangerous for everyone involved, and told Manny that if they didn't find me someone I could work with in Pashto and Dari that I simply would refuse to work there. Making a mistake could be worse than not doing the work at all. Meanwhile, Pakistan was becoming more and more dangerous. The Taliban were getting more and more ensconced in Pakistan by the week. There was plenty of evidence that they really were still involved with Al Qaeda and there were no margins for error because of the instability in the government and what the Pakistani government had in its arsenal. I had to say that Pakistan was becoming a frightening place. And my standard of frightening was pretty different from the average person's view.

I was glad for the break of being in New Orleans again for the third week of August. I had fun dancing with Sean while Layla danced with Rasul one night. Eric did not enjoy watching me dancing with Sean, however. Eric and I spent time dancing in the library but always ended up doing more than just dancing, which, I reflected, was probably why it was so hard for Eric to deal with my dancing with anyone else. I tried to soak up as much enjoyment as possible from my weeklong stay, dreading going back to Virginia because I knew more Pakistan awaited me. When Eric asked again, for the third time, close to dawn the day before I was leaving to go back to Virginia, I sighed and said I'd 'think about it' and just buried my head in his chest. I really missed him when I was away. I just didn't know that I believed things could work out in the long term, however. He seemed happy it wasn't a flat out 'no' anymore. We fell asleep happy. But later that evening we quarreled about when I was coming in September. It was perfectly obvious to both of us that the real quarrel was about what came after September, when I'd have no more PTO days. I had already told Manny that I wanted to take extra time in October and November unpaid, but it was pending approval. Words like 'pending' didn't go over well with Eric.

September, meanwhile, brought all kinds of problems. I had to change my travel dates, which upset Eric, in large part because I think he could sense that I was increasingly edgy about working in Pakistan. It was the bulk of my work currently and I still wasn't saying no to working there, even though I was edgy about it. The work was too important in my eyes. Eric would look at me in stony silence sometimes and I'd feel the chill all the way through the internet connection when I'd simply say I couldn't discuss things with him. He could know where I was going but not much else. By early September I'd actually started thinking about whether I should just tell the Bureau I didn't want to go on working in Central Asia. Our visits were longer and our fallback position of the US Embassy was less than comforting. Ahmed had been unsettled from the start by the fact that neighboring structures were too close to the embassy building and that security, given what all appeared to be going on around us, looked marginal. Ahmed joked that if the embassy was the fallback, then we were off a cliff. By mid-September though, things were bad enough so that Alla had come back to work early, since Ahmed told her how badly things were going without her. The scare with the Pasto interpreter had been repeated yet again, this time with reports of materials for a dirty bomb having been obtained by Al Qaeda operatives but an inability to locate the cell or verify the information. Thankfully, as my gut instinct and ability to read the Taliban guy's visuals suggested, in the end, it was a resource wasting lie. Meanwhile, everyone we spoke to in the US or Pakistani military assured us that things were still stable. The problem was they were telling that to a telepath. I had started telling Ahmed back in August, after my last visit to New Orleans, that I was thinking about quitting. By mid-September, the three of us talked quietly among ourselves about how much longer we would stay. Because of the seriousness of the situation, we thought we could stick it out a while longer. We were still getting useful information about a mounting risk to the Pakistani government that could impact US interests in the entire region and maybe even back home in the US. Even if loved ones and family hated it, maybe we could stick it out until closer to the end of the year, was our thinking. But that was the longest I was willing to stay. I had come to the conclusion that my life seemed to gravitate toward danger no matter what I did. If I was going to be in danger, I would rather be in danger with Eric, at home, than in some far flung corner of the world. While I hadn't told anyone else, I told Ahmed and Alla that I was planning to quit in the late fall. I wanted to be home by mid-December, for the holidays.

Sometimes though, as Alla would say, fate seems to have a different plan.