A/N: Here's what happened in Forks and when Bella gets to New York. Enjoy

I don't own twilight; I do own a lot of broken crayons, which are scattered around my entire house.

Bella POV

Angela came over two days after I got home to help me start packing some of my stuff for school. I was scheduled to leave nine days later for New York City, and I needed to get something, anything packed before then. I had spent the past forty eight hours basically curled up in a ball on my bed crying and listening to depressing music. My parents came in every so often, but luckily my mother chose to keep her mouth shut regarding everything. Angela was also going to try to help me figure out some ideas to try to win Edward back, although she initially wasn't much help since she had never gone through a break up herself.

As we sorted through my CD's, Angela suggested I make him a mix CD which sounded like a good idea at the time. "You can put on songs which remind you of your time together."

"Wouldn't I basically be rubbing salt in the wounds? I don't want to make things worse," I admitted ruefully as I sorted the discs into two piles; one to bring to New York and one to stay in Forks.

"Don't you think you should have thought about that before you decided not to tell Edward about Columbia? Anything you do will probably be considered 'rubbing salt in the wounds' Bella" said Angela curiously as I glared at her in frustration.

"Thanks for the support Ang."

"Bella, you know I love you and I will do almost anything to help you in your efforts to win Edward back, but you need to admit you were at fault for this situation. Sure, in the last few days he wouldn't even let you talk about it, but you had plenty of chances to tell him before then." I nodded at Angela in acknowledgment, because no matter what anyone says, this is my fault and I'm the only one who can fix it. "What about the pictures?"

"What about them?" I asked in confusion.

"Print them out and send them to him. You can even write little heartfelt messages on the back of them all. Then include a letter telling him how you feel and how to get in touch with you in New York City," she suggested with a big grin. I leaned forward and gave her a huge hug and a kiss on the cheek.

"That's a brilliant idea. Edward talked constantly about me sending him the photos, so it would work great, except for one little hitch… I don't know how to get in touch with him. I don't have his address in Boston or his address in New York," I said with a slightly defeated sigh.

"Bella, there's only one person you can ask… Alice." I couldn't believe I hadn't thought of Alice previously. Then again, her loyalties lie with her big brother, not me, so she might not even help me.

"Ok, let's email her," I said confidently as I grabbed my laptop and quickly opened my email to begin typing.

Dear Alice,

I'm sure I'm the last person you want to hear from right now, but I am writing to ask for your help. I know I screwed things up terribly with Edward, but I want to do anything I can to get him back. I miss him so much Alice, I can't even begin to explain it. Everything is completely my fault, but I can't even consider trying to repair it without a bit of help from you. All I need is his mailing address in New York City. I have something I desperately need to send to him, so I am pleading with you to show a little compassion and help me. Edward means more to me than anything in my life and I will spend the rest of my life trying to fix this, with or without your help.

Apologetically,

Bella

"That sounds really good Bella. You should have probably appealed to her romantic side, but it works. She should be willing to help you, I think," said Angela with a small smile as I hit the send button and closed down my email. I then logged onto the local Walgreen's website and uploaded all my photos to print. I paid almost $80 for doubles of all the photos, but it would be worth it. I could pick them up tomorrow and start writing all my small notes for Edward.

"What's this?" asked Angela as she grabbed my silver dress that Edward had gotten me in Paris from the closet.

"It's a cocktail dress Ang, what does it look like?" I replied anxiously as I watched her finger the tag on the dress in surprise.

"Badgley Mischka… seriously? This isn't a knock off is it?" she asked as I shook my head signally that it was in fact real. "Holy shit Bella, you didn't tell me Edward was rich."

"Because it's not important Ang. I would love him just as much if he had bought me a shitty dress at the Goodwill. I didn't even know for a while that he was loaded, well his family is loaded." Angela hung the dress back up and looked at me with a bit of surprise in her eyes.

"What else did he get you?" she asked as she placed her hands on her hips. She reminded of my mother for an instant, so I slowly held my arm out to show her the bracelet Edward had given me in London. "Does he have a brother?"

"Yeah, he does. His name is Emmett but he isn't single. Sorry sweetie."

By the time dinner rolled around, I was in a considerably better mood and I had packed two boxes of things to be shipped to me at the dorm, which was a big accomplishment considering how much I hadn't done before today. My downfall was the fact that I spent most of my time with Angela telling her about the trip and gushing about Edward. I explained every little detail about him from the way he smelt, to the way he liked to run his fingers through my hair. I told her how much I missed lying my head on his chest to sleep and that I felt empty without him. I was crying only two minutes into the conversation, but she consoled me and we started to talk about happier topics, like how I felt complete when I heard Edward play the piano for me and how much fun we had in Paris. It felt very surreal now, and I couldn't believe how badly I had screwed everything up. I was relying on Alice, the little sister of my ex boyfriend, to fix everything, and I don't know how I feel about that.

Three days later, I sat perched on my bed with my pen clutched in my teeth as I tried to think of something to write on the back of the picture of Edward and I had taken on the boat in Venice. Right after this photo was taken, we had mutually pleased each other, for lack of a better term, and I was having difficulty figuring out what to write. Nothing felt right, until I remembered what he had said to me once we had finished, and I wrote I will never do this with anyone else EVER. He would clearly understand what it meant, even if it was one of the more cryptic notes I had written. As soon as I had written a small note on the back of all the photos, I combined them into a small box with the letter I had written and then checked my email, praying for a response from Alice, and it was there.

I was suddenly very nervous and dialed Angela as quickly as possible to let her know I had finally gotten a response. I didn't want to open it. I was worried she would tell me to stay the fuck out of Edward's life, which was something I knew I couldn't do.

"What does it say?" asked Angela eagerly once I had told her the situation.

"I don't want to open it. What if it's bad?" I asked nervously.

"Bella, just do it. It's like pulling off a band-aid, just open the damn thing and get it over with." I nodded my head at her advice, even though she couldn't see me and opened the email, reading it out loud to Angela.

Bella,

I was shocked to see an email from you, and even though Edward told me never to email you, I had to respond because I can see you are hurting without him. He's pretty fucked up honestly and if it wasn't for Jasper, Emmett and I keeping such a close eye on him, he would have done some pretty regrettable stuff by now. He's fairly safe right now though. I think he's passed out on his bed or something like that.

Anyways, I know you have a good heart, you were just confused by your feelings for him, and this is why I am agreeing to help you. His address in New York is 5487 Bleeker, Apt 301, New York City, 14857. He's moving in this Saturday. I can't give you a phone number because he doesn't have one yet, but I will send it when they get it. I hope you can say or do something to fix this because I have no idea if Jasper and Emmett will be able to handle him when he gets to New York.

Please don't hurt him again. I don't think anyone in the Cullen family could take it if this happened again.

Alice

"Jesus Angela, she said he was fucked up and he would have done some regrettable stuff. I had no idea I hurt him so badly," I said as I burst out into tears. I hadn't cried for almost three days, and everything was coming back to me like I was sitting at JFK and he had just left me.

"Bella, please calm down," she said sweetly, trying to get me to calm my crying. "She gave you the address that is the most important thing. Did you finish everything?"

"Yeah, I got it done just before I checked my email," I said as I wiped the tears from my eyes and grabbed the box and pen that rested on my bed beside me. I wrote the address down and smiled sadly, hoping that this would be enough to at least convince him to contact me. It was a good start, regardless of what happened next. After Angela and I got off the phone, I sent Alice a quick email to thank her and put the box on my desk. I would be mailing it first thing in the morning.

It was only nine days later when I sat at the gate at Sea-Tac airport listening to one of the depressing playlists I had made when I first spilt with Edward. They were all I listened to these days, some days I even found myself searching on line for songs which were even more depressing than what I had. My personal favorites were 'Good Enough' by Sarah McLachlan and 'I Just Don't Think I'll Ever Get Over You' by Colin Hay. Damned Scrubs for reminding me of that song a few days ago. My parents and I had a tense goodbye when we got to the airport. Charlie hugged me and gave me a kiss, while Renee looked at me in disappointment for not calling Jacob. I had no regrets about that situation. I rested my head against the plastic chair and waited for my flight. I wanted out of Forks, but I was nervous about what waited for me in New York.

Edward hadn't responded to the package I sent him with the photos in it, even though I had included my contact information in New York and Forks. I slept with my cell phone every night, desperate for any form of communication from him, even a text that said he still loved me. But there was nothing. When I touched down in New York, a feeling of déjà vu washed over me. The last time I was here was when I finally told Edward about Columbia and he dumped me, leaving me on the floor by the gate crying my eyes out. I was beyond that now. I had fucked up and I was going to use all my energy to get him back. I needed him back.

I took a cab from the airport to my dorm and struggled to carry my bags up the stairs, but was helped by a fairly muscular curly haired man who looked at least two years older than me. "Thanks," I said sweetly as we walked up the stairs together and stopped at my door. I pulled out the key I was given downstairs when I registered, and thought he would leave once he put my bags on the floor, but he didn't.

"It's no problem, I was actually coming to this room anyways," he said with a grin as I unlocked the door and led us inside. The room was a decent size, so I couldn't complain. We each had our own bedroom, but shared a bathroom, which would be difficult at best if we had classes around the same time, but I tried not to worry about it. Perhaps she was really low maintenance. With my luck, I got one of the hippie girls who never shaved their pits as a roommate.

"So, I'm guessing you're looking for Rosalie?" I said as we left my bags on my bed and walked into the common area. The guy walked around the room for a moment, checking out all the specifics just like I was doing. There were two small couches, a TV and a coffee table in the living room. The TV was pretty extravagant, so I guessed Rosalie had brought it with her from wherever she was from.

"Yeah, I'm her boyfriend," he began to say before we were interrupted by a stunning blonde girl, who I immediately assumed was Rosalie because she began kissing Emmett as though there was no one else in the room. She had long blonde hair and an hourglass figure. Emmett clearly was a lucky guy for having landed her. I cleared my throat and she looked at me with a big grin.

"Hi, I'm Rosalie. You must be Isabella," she said with a smile as she extended her hand for me to take it. I shook it gently and was amazed by how smooth her skin was. So much for my dream of a low maintenance roommate.

"Yeah, but I prefer Bella." I said casually as her eyes lit up in confusion.

"Bella Swan right? You're from Washington State?" she asked again and I nodded my head as I raised my eye brow curiously. "This is my boyfriend, Emmett Cullen. I think you might have someone in common." Fuck me.

"I seriously think the dormitory gods have just shit on me. No offence Rosalie, I'm sure you are a great girl, but I think I will apply for a change of rooms in the morning, if you don't mind," I snapped in frustration. Could this get any worse? I'm rooming with the girlfriend of Edward's brother, it is officially hell.

"Don't worry about it Bella. Edward doesn't know. I didn't put two and two together until right now. He won't be coming around here, so it's fine. You don't need to move," she said sweetly as I smiled at her apologetically.

"Sorry for the reaction, I'm just not handling things well. Even hearing his name right now is enough to drive me to drink."

"If it helps, you're a lot prettier than your photos," said Emmett quickly before he covered his mouth with his hand, clearly having said something he shouldn't have.

"You saw the photos?" I asked incredulously. I at least I could take comfort in the fact that he received them. "Did he throw them out? Burn them in effigy?"

"Hardly. I am not going to say what he did with them, but I will say there are definitely unresolved feelings on his end, and I hope you guys can fix this, because I am tired of taking care of his drunken ass every night." I actually leaned forward and gave Emmett a hug, which caught him off guard.

"Thanks for taking care of him," I said sweetly as I wandered into my bedroom, with a little smile on my face. Edward had the photos, and he hadn't ruined them. He missed me. I needed to figure out the next step in my game plan, but I had no idea where to start. Although, I do have his address, so I could just get up the nerve and go see him.