Discs.: I don't own the show nor its characters!

A/N: I know it took quite a while but here is (finally) the new chapter...Thank goes to Damned Lolita for correcting this chapter...


Broken

6. Irresolution is painful

When Hotch lay next to Haley that night, he tried to comprehend the events of the last few days. He couldn't get the kiss out of his mind. He realized that he won't be able to find to sleep, so he got up from bed. After he got ready for work, he wrote a note to let his wife know where he was.

30 minutes later:

Elle was totally lost in her thoughts. She was still thinking about Hotch, wondering what the kiss had meant for both of them, when she was interrupted by a soft knock against her door. She looked up and smiled when she saw Hotch standing in the doorway smiling back at her. He entered the room and sat down on a chair next to her bed.

"How are you doing, Elle?" He looked softly at her.

"I'm alright...What are you doing here?"

She was curious, but also glad that he was there. He got up from the chair and sat down on her bed. Then he lifted his left hand and let his fingers slide through her hair.

She simply looked him into the eyes, enjoying his proximity. Hotch pulled her close to him, and she leaned against him, resting her head on his shoulder.

"You shouldn't be here..."

Elle lifted her head and looked at him.

"I know...But I wanted to see you before going to work."

His cell phone started ringing. It was Gideon, who told him that they had a new case.

"Sorry, I have to get to the office..."

He looked at Elle.

"New case?"

He nodded, and then he leaned in and kissed her softly.

"Aaron..."

"I should better go now..."

He got up and left.

At the office:

Hotch was lost in his thoughts as he arrived at the office. He went straight to the conference room for the briefing about the new case.

"So, what do we have?"

Hotch looked at his team.

"Not much...Five lawyers were killed in Portland. They went to the same college - except of that there are no obvious links between them." Morgan stated.

"They were shot into the face - that's personal, maybe someone from their past? Furthermore the UnSub left similar messages at all the scenes 'Everybody gets what he deserves one day - and now it is time for payback.' It was certainly someone they knew." Reid pointed out.

"We should get ready to leave — take-off is in 20." Gideon let them know.

Hotch let out a heavy sigh. He knew that it was probably best for him to get some distance between him and his problems. Still, it was tough for him to work on a case so far away from DC – from Elle...He wasn't happy about the fact that he won't be able to see Elle when he wanted to do so — but his team needed him. Furthermore Elle was feeling better so he didn't need to worry about her...

On the plane:

Hotch was sitting in one corner of the jet unable to focus onto the conversation of his team about the case, once more his mind was filled with thoughts about Elle.

After a while Gideon approached him and sat down next to his friend. Quietly, he said, "Hey, you want to share your thoughts?"

Hotch smirked. "Not really..."

"Let me guess, it's Elle that you think about, right?"

"I did something very stupid - which is going to make the whole situation even more complicated."

"What happened?"

"It doesn't matter."

"Really?" Gideon looked doubtfully at Hotch.

"Sometimes I wish I could simply make a decision - but I can't and it makes me feel horrible. And whenever I'm at home I feel guilty because Haley doesn't deserve to be treated like this...I just don't have any clue what to do about it..."

Hotch let out a heavy sigh.

"Well, you need to find a solution for this problem."

Gideon looked at Hotch.

"I know that, but it isn't that easy..."

Hotch's cell phone started ringing. He took a look onto the caller's id and answered the call.

"Hey. What's up?"

"I just wanted to know how you are..." Haley said.

"I'm okay..."

"Are you at the office?"

"No. We've got a new case in Portland..."

"Oh. Be careful, okay?"

"Sure...How's Jack?"

"He's fine, except maybe of the fact that he fell onto his butt when he tried to walk..."

A smile appeared on Hotch's face.

"Aaron?"

"Yeah. Uhm, I've got to go..."

"Bye."

"Bye."

He hung up. Once again he realized what a messed up situation he had gotten himself into. He would never be able to make a decision. There was no right choice - he loved and needed them both...

Tbc


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