"…hmm, tomato-chan, what position do you like the best?"
"…"
"Tomato-chan!"
"…shut up, Sakura."
………
…
…
-
-
He had trouble finding her. When he finally did, she was talking to a local boy who obviously enjoyed watching the bounce of Sakura's breasts. Sharingan activated without him willing it. He jumped down from the roof, landing with a dull thud in between them.
"Sasuke-kun…"
"You annoying pest." He snarled.
The local boy perked up and shouted at him. "HEY! That's the girl of my dreams! You don't talk to her like that!"
Sasuke merely gave the boy a Look. "How about this, asshole: you shut up and I don't kill you."
The boy stepped back, grimacing. An Uchiha? Oh no. Better run for his life. Which the boy did without glancing back at Sakura.
"Hey! Ryu-kun!"
"Sakura."
"He ran away! Why do you have to be soooo rude, Sasuke-kun?"
"That piece of shit is your dream boy? Wake up, you idiot."
"At least he's willing to have sex with me unlike you, human ice berg!"
The villagers raised their brows and looked around at them. Being the saner of the two, Sasuke flushed in embarrassment and groaned. "Annoying pest. That's you." He grabbed her wrist roughly. "Why can't you just shut up?"
"If you want me to be quiet then kiss me."
His nose flared. "You're awfully forward when you're not on your right mind."
"Who says I'm not on my right mind?"
Sasuke twitched.
What a pest. Literally.
"Let's go." He growled. Sakura looked up to him dreamily.
"But I'm so—"
"Shut up. Or I'll put you on a leash." He hissed but Sakura grinned happily, flushed, her eyes glazed over, obviously excited at the idea. Sasuke twitched, flustered, pink-cheeked in embarrassment as Sakura became pinker. Her usually innocent eyes were glowing strangely, as if there was someone else occupying her body.
"That's…" she ran her tongue over her upper lip and sucked on her bottom lip. "Kinky." Sakura whispered, fluttering her eyelashes playfully. Sasuke's whole body twitched.
"Shut up."
Sakura pouted and with her strange strength, snatched her wrist free from his grip.
"You're breaking my heart, Sasuke-kun!" She said loudly, attracting incredulous stares from bystanders. Sasuke was mortified at the attention. Kakashi will kill him once the news of incredibly horny Sakura who looks for a sex partner spread all over the village.
"Sakura…" Sasuke started but Sakura waved a hand in front of his face that silenced him.
"I… I just want to kiss you, you know! I want you. I miss you. I like you. I love you—" Sasuke became very red at this point, "—I love you like the way I love my panties!"
Sasuke wished he'd die now.
"Pink panties, by the way!" The pink-haired girl added thoughtfully, her cheeks flushed that made her prettier.
"Shut up, please."
Sakura flashed him a pretty smile. "Make me, baby."
The boy ground his teeth, glaring murderously at Sakura. The girl only smiled innocently and gave him a flying kiss before spinning around and running off.
Sasuke, having longer legs, longer strides, caught up easily with Sakura. He reached down and seized her wrist, wincing afterwards as he realized he had used more force than what was necessary. However, the girl didn't seem to mind as she continued to sing ("the tide is high but I'm holding ON!")
"Oohh, you're here." A large, drunken grin.
"And damn you."
Her eyes became even more glazed over. "Ohh, that's what I loved about you! Such rudeness… is so hot. I really like you, Sasuke-kun. Such vulgarity… makes me incredibly…"
Fuck. Sasuke thought with a grimace. He jerked when he felt her hand on his cheek. His eyes narrowed.
"…wetter."
Images plagued his mind, and as a boy, he liked what he was seeing. Growling at himself mentally, he snatched her hand off his cheek and gripped it.
"You're annoying. You're sick. You need help."
She rolled her eyes. "I'm not sick. I'm perfectly healthy!"
"You're not. You're sick."
Sakura pouted and tossed her hair over her shoulder. "Am I?" she screwed up her face and Sasuke found it… annoyingly cute. How crappy.
"Yes. And shut up. Don't talk."
"Fine. You don't want me to talk? I won't. I'll behave because that's what you want me to do. I'll do it because that's what you want."
Sasuke glared. "Now, you're sane."
Green eyes glittered, her smile dreamy. "But… kiss me."
Dark eyes widened at first, before narrowing. The muscles on his jaw clenched, pulled taut over the prominent bones as he pressed his teeth together and ground them.
"You're insane."
"Oh." Sakura drawled. "One kiss and I'll shut up." Her hands waved dramatically. Her smile was sickeningly sweet. "I will not talk for an hour. You'll like that, won't you? Peace and quietttttttt!" She sang shrilly, giggled behind her hand and twirled. Sasuke, even though irritated, admitted that despite her momentary lapse of sanity, she remained graceful.
"Two hours." He considered.
She grinned. "One hour."
"Three hours." Sasuke turned away. She was stepping closer, and he didn't move away.
"Nooooo! I'll die! Do you want me to die? I can't stay quiet that long, I'll die!" Sasuke winced at her shrill tone. "One hour! One hour! Sixty minutes, three thousand six hundred seconds of peace and harmony and quiet and joy and—"
"I get it. Now, shut up."
"—peace and harmony—"
"Fine. One hour." Sasuke snapped.
Sakura smiled. And to Sasuke, it was beautiful. Angelic, even. But he was rudely reminded that she was freaking out of her mind right now. He hoped, for her own sake, that she would not be able to remember all of these. Sakura, being Sakura, would dig her own grave and chuck herself down the pit.
Oh, why, oh why did it have to happen? Why Team Seven?
Was this some kind of karma for running off to Sound and playing dress up with Orochimaru?
He was scarred for life, he was sure. He'd never look at little Sakura who wasn't so little anymore the same way again.
He sighed, almost in despair.
And then, he glared at Sakura pointedly. "Don't ever try to pull a trick on me after this."
Sakura faked a hurt look. "Oh? You don't trust me?" She batted her eyelashes at him. Sasuke fought the urge to gag. "That hurt me on the inside."
Sasuke snorted.
Smiling, the pink-haired medic moved closer to him. The boy twitched at the closeness. It was… awkward. Her smile widened, a dimple appearing on her cheek. Lashes lowered over her green eyes, Sakura moved closer, putting her hands on his shoulders. Sasuke, on the other hand, heaved a deep breath discreetly, and he was disgusted to discover that his hands were shaking a little, his palms were moist and his heart was skipping…
(ohhh sugar!
Me need sugar! Kissy, kissy… Mmm!)
Sasuke punched his inner pervert, which dissolved into goo.
The breath on his face was warm, ticklish, but it felt good. As her face drew closer, her lips parting, Sasuke almost turn and flee but he held his ground, clenching his hands into fists.
"Sasuke-kun…" For a moment there, she sounded… normal. But all thoughts escaped him when her lips touched his. His eyelids dropped, his heart thudded and his heartbeat sounded like a gong. Her lips didn't move, only touching his. And then, she pressed forward, moved her lips over his and nipped at his bottom lip.
Slowly, Sasuke's lips moved, opening his mouth. Boldly, Sakura leaned closer, her hands squeezing the tensed muscles on his shoulders. Their mouths moved against each other. Sakura's hands moved to his hair, nails scoring his scalp. The action made something snapped inside Sasuke. The movements between their mouths grew fervent.
"Mmm…" Sakura gripped his head between her small hands, kissing him, dipping her tongue inside his mouth boldly. She moved her head in an angle to slant her lips over his. The kiss deepened, grew bolder. When Sakura groaned, Sasuke stiffened, and without his control, his hands moved, grabbing at Sakura's hips, pulling her closer to his heated body. With his right hand, he cradled the back of her head, kissing her back. Tongues tangled, saliva mixed. Sasuke hugged her closer, crushing her small frame on his hard body. Pink locks curled around his fingers as he rubbed her scalp, eliciting a soft moan from the girl. Aggressively, Sasuke nipped at her bottom lip, biting and sucking until it swelled between his teeth.
"Sasuke…kun…" Sakura whispered breathlessly against his teeth. He surprised her with a forceful thrust of his tongue between her teeth. Her small hands fisted on his hair and pulled.
Sasuke groaned.
Damn it.
With immense difficulty, Sasuke pulled away, wrenching his mouth forcefully from hers. Abruptly, the boy pulled away from the embrace. Sakura stumbled backward, breathing heavily.
Sasuke cursed under his breath at his lost of control. With the back of his hand, he wiped his damp mouth, and winced at the amount of the moisture. He licked his lips and tasted her melon-flavored lip gloss.
Sweet.
"That's it." He glared. "One hour of silence, Sakura."
Dazedly, the girl nodded. Then, she smiled sweetly, lashes lowered. Unbidden, his gaze strayed and stayed on her mouth. Sakura sucked her bottom lip and licked the upper one slowly, deliberately.
Sasuke's stare wavered, flickering. Her smile widened, as if she knew something about him that he didn't know. The Uchiha heaved a deep sigh before turning away.
"Let's go."
………
……
…
"I love you darling-oh, I love you pet-oh, I love you asshole-oh, I love you cake-oh, I love you, sparkle-oh, I love you, choco-oh, I love you… BAMBI-oh! WHERE'S BAMBI?"
"Sakura."
"BAMBI! I love you Bambi, I love you so muccccccccccch!"
"…Sakura."
"Sasubomb, there you are! Sasubomb, let's play! Rawr!"
"Sakura."
"LET'S MAKE BABIES! LET'S MAKE BABIESSSSS!"
………
……
…
-
-
"Naruto!" Sasuke bellowed.
The said ninja stopped his taijutsu training. "Oi, teme!" he waved, grinning.
The dark-haired shinobi stopped in front of Naruto. "It's your turn to look after Sakura." Beside him, the girl started to protest but Sasuke shot her a warning look and she closed her mouth.
Naruto raised a brow. "She lost her voice?"
Sasuke shook his head. "I'm leaving her to you."
Sakura viciously shook her head. Sasuke ignored this.
"Okay! Don't worry, teme! I'll look after her!"
"Make sure she keeps her legs together and that she doesn't jump into some random man's bed."
"OF COURSE, I WON'T LET HER!"
Sasuke gave his best friend a fierce glare. "Don't slack off, dead-last." He turned to Sakura next who glared at him. "Stick with Naruto. Don't go looking for trouble, do you understand?"
She snorted, looking away, but suddenly, a smile brightened her face and she smiled and nodded at Sasuke eagerly. His dark eyes narrowed suspiciously at her fast change of mood.
"Behave, got it?"
Sakura nodded.
"Naruto, handle her." He told the blond.
"You worry too much." Naruto drawled, grinning wickedly.
"I'm not worried." Sasuke spat before leaving, while ignoring Sakura's giddy wave. He was surprisingly uneasy, almost dreading the day ahead.
She's not stupid, right? She's not going to do something stupid…
Right?
Sasuke, oh, Sasuke…
………
……
…
"I want a pink-haired suicidal homosexual red-eyed long-haired pretty marble-skinned onion-skinned arrogant chicken butt choco-licious perverted sexy ass baby boy."
"…I want a normal life, Sakura."
………
……
…
-
-
Thirty minutes later, in the training field, Sasuke barely started his training, evident by still unharmed dummies, when he heard Naruto's terrified yells of his name.
"SASUKE! SASUKE! SASUKE!"
Angrily, the boy threw down his kunai. "Shut up, idiot!"
"SASUKE! SASUKEEEE—"
Sasuke slammed his fist onto Naruto's cheek. "Owww…"
"Calm now?" Naruto nodded. "What is it?"
"It's… It's…" Tears brimmed Naruto's eyes. "…SAKURA-CHAN!"
Dark eyes bulged, and then narrowed. "What about her?"
"She… She…" Naruto sniffed before continuing. "SASUKE, SAVE HER VIRGINITY!"
Seconds later, Naruto was flying in the air after a swift but hard kick.
………
……
…
"I wish my boobs are bigger… so that you can sleep on them and so that you can put your head on my boobies! Whisper in my earrrrr, babyyyy! Isn't it great, Sasu-jelly?"
"I wish you shut up."
………
……
…
-
-
"Sakura!"
The girl looked up. Seeing the dark-haired, scowling (but sexy, sexy) boy marching towards her, Sakura grinned and waved, "Ohh! Here's Sasuke-kuuuuun! Want to join us, darling?"
"You… annoying… pest." Sasuke wanted to congratulate himself for being able to string three words together.
Sakura blinked. "Oh." She showed a flashy smile. "You're angry."
Angry? ANGRY?
He was furious. Mad. He had visions of a dark-haired boy spanking a pink-haired girl in her luscious pink butt.
No. Tying her up in spread eagle was, by far, the best fantasy.
That… stupid, annoying girl.
His nose flared. "What… the hell are you doing?"
She shrugged. "I'm having… fun?"
"No." Sasuke bellowed, his voice rumbling. Bystanders staggered back in fear. "You're… you're…" he searched for an appropriate word, but found nothing. He glared at the small poster above Sakura's head: DEFEAT ME AND… TAKE ME HOME TO THE PLACE WHERE… I BELONGED!
His blood boiled and the all-consuming urge to kill someone was… Arggh.
"We're leaving." Sasuke growled with all the patience he can muster.
"Nooooo! I'm having so much fun! You can't take me home that easily. There are lots and lots of boys wanting to try! I can't… I can't be biased! I'm so sorry, Sasuke-kun! But… but… you know I like you, right? So, don't worry, love!"
"Sakura…"
She shook her head vigorously. "No. Sasuke-kun, no! As much as I want to lift my skirt for you…" Her eyes rounded. "I can't. You have to fall in line and wait for your turn. I don't want them to call me biased!"
"Are you insane?" Sasuke hissed, almost hysterical, but Sakura ignored him and continued entertaining her "costumers". Apparently, to take her home and play with her, a costumer had to beat her in an arm-wrestling. A boy was gawking at the pretty (insane, stupid, out-of-her-mind, annoying) girl, getting ready. However, when Sakura smiled, he drooled and bam—
"Next, please!"
"Sakura." Sasuke tried to rationalize with her but—
"NEXT! NEXT! NEXT! NEXT!"
"SAKURA!" Sasuke snapped loudly, pale red in anger.
"Sasukeeee-kuuuun my loveeee— I know you want me so much but being an Alpha male you are, you deny it and it's kinda hot but lame and unoriginal and cliché! I know you're upset and scared and angry and jealous but— there is a BIG BANG 'but' here!— if you really, really, really want me and really, really, really want to make me yours and IF you really, really, really want to make babies with me, then… fall in line and wait for your turn!"
Sasuke ground his molars together. "Don't make me hit you, Sakura."
"OH YEAH?" Sakura roared. "Don't make me hit you too! I'M HAVING SO MUCH FUN HERE AND I DON'T WANT TO HURT YOU, CASTRATE YOU, TEAR YOU, BREAK YOU AND PUNCH YOU BECAUSE I LOVE YOU SOOO MUCH BUT IF YOU STOP ME, HIT ME… I'LL HAVE TO LIFT MY SKIRT AND EVERYONE WILL HAVE TO SEE MY FRILLY PINK PANTIES—"
The boys started to chant. "Hit her! Hit her!"
"Shut up. Shut up now." Sasuke growled, his whole face twitching with multiple tics all over his forehead. "Fine. Do whatever you want."
"ARIGATO, LOVER BOY."
Sasuke grudgingly waited in line (which in his horror, was in zigzags and loops, just how many perverts lived in Konoha? He should have stayed in Sound).
"NEXT! NEXT! NEXT! NEXT!"
"Teme! There you are!" Naruto arrived, panting.
"Idiot." Sasuke snarled. "Why the hell did you let her do this… stupidity?"
"I didn't!" the blond yelled. "She… she… She punched me and I flew and I SAW SPACE AND JUPITER—"
"Shut up."
"Fine! But—"
"Shut up."
"I won't! I can't! Teme, you've got to save her! Kakashi-sensei will—"
Poof!
"I will what, Naruto?"
………
……
…
"Where's my Happy Ending?"
"Where's my Prince Charming?"
"Where's my Shiny, Shiny Castle Atop A Shiny Hill?"
"WHERE'S BAMBI?"
…
…
"Please, Sakura. Shut up."
"Only if you kiss me."
Kiss, kiss.
Mwah, mwah.
Hug, hug.
"…Bambi is over there."
"WHERE? OHHHHH BAMBI THERE YOU ARE! I MISS YOU!"