"Garfield"

"What have I said about calling me Garfield Rae?"

He was playing videogames and didn't even look at her. Raven sighed in and out a few times to get control over her emotions.

"Gar, there's something I need to talk to you about."

"What?"

"I have feelings for you, and that is why my powers have gone out of control lately and why I've acted differently toward you. And I know you don't feel the same way so don't worry. I'll deal with it. I just wanted to tell you because you've been worried lately and I didn't want you to worry."

Then she turned and left. On the screen the words GAME OVER were flashing with huge red letters, but Garfield just stared at nothing, not realising nor caring what was written on the screen.

The paparazzi had finally gone home, and she was saying good bye. Garfield was standing on his rock skipping stones into the ocean. He didn't, couldn't see her leave again.

Raven was walking down the hall while reading her book. She was so concentrated that when Garfield suddenly appeared right in front of her she was surprised, but was of course careful not to show it. It had been two weeks since her confession and she had only made things worse for the young green man. Raven closed the book and looked at him. He looked down on the floor, then he followed her body up to her eyes.

"I told you Gar, I'll handel this."

Then he kissed her. And despite the voice in her head screaming this was a mistake, Raven kissed him back. She gave in to love, to passion, to want, to need. To his lips on hers. To his hands against her bare skin. To his want that was pulsating, fuling hers. To his body that pushed her against the wall. To his hand that was behind her head so she wouldn't be hurt. To the secret dream she had of him loving her. Thou this wasn't love. Thou this was wrong. It felt just too right to ignore. The lights went out and they pulled away from each other. Raven couldn't see, but she could feel. She felt more than she had ever allowed herself to feel her entier life.

"Come."

He grabbed her hand and pulled her down the hall to his room. And she followed. Not caring that she had dropped her book. He closed the door behind her, and none of them seemed to notice his room was being wrecked. He pulled off his t-shirt before lifting her up to his top bunk like she weighed nothing, and pulled himself up behind her. He was hovering over her, and Raven didn't care what would happen when they were done. What this was doing to the things around them. That this could ruin everything. She just pulled him closer and ignored all the other voices in her head than the one saying this is good.

Garfield looked up at the window. Cara looked down at him, and when she saw him she smiled and waved. He smiled and waved back. Then she turned her face inward, before walking away.

It was early, even for her. But Raven knew she wouldn't be able to sleep anymore. After her usual morning rituals she went up to the roof and started to meditate. For hours she tried to get her emotions under control, but she couldn't. Happiness was filling her mind and forcing her to smile.

"Get a hold of yourself Raven. This is stupid. You know he doesn't love you back. Yesterday was just about passion and desire. He is the animal man. He can't help wanting to sleep around."

But it didn't help. She couldn't calm down Happiness and she couldn't stop smiling. She sat a few more hours, when a wave of emotions forced themselves on her, and she knew someone had joined her on the roof. She turned and just stared at Garfield.

"Hi."

He started to walk toward her, but that wasn't what she was focused on. His emotions where complex, as they were with all people, but there was one emotion there that made her heart beat faster and making her break all the windows in the tower. He loved her, and not like he had loved her two weeks earlier. As a close friend. He LOVED her. He got that stupid desperate look on his face.

"Don't cry Rae. I'm sorry about last night okay. I just... Just don't cry Rae. Please."

Raven looked down and touched her cheeks, before quickly drying them. Then she looked up at him with her usual calm face. He seemed a little better, and even gave her his boyish half smile. She kissed him. He loved her, so she kissed him. She loved him, so she kissed him. He kissed her back, so she kissed him more. They pulled apart, both now unable to not smile. He grabbed her hand and started to walk toward the door and the stairs downward to the others. Raven didn't care. She let Happiness do what she pleased and followed willingly.

Garfield continued to look up at the window where Cara had been. Raven walked over to it and looked out. Her arms crossed seemingly listening to something being said to her, but focusing on the view. Jenny was right, he still loved her. He still wanted her. He still needed her.

He could see she was pained by how the fans were forcing themselves on her, and he couldn't help admiring how she continued to write autographs and talk to them. He had that stupid grin on his face that he always got when he was looking at her, and despite having his own fans to take care of, his main focus was just to adore her from afare. Now and then she would look his way and give him a quick smile and Garfield would send an even bigger smile back. When they had done their duty, all of the titans sat in the car and Victor started to drive back. Raven was looking out of the window, but when Garfield grabbed after her hand she grabbed back.

"Those kids were cool weren't they?"

"Oh yes. They were wonderful. Don't you agree Richard? Would you not want bumgorfs of your own soon?"

Richard started to cough of his girlfriend's question, and the other three titans couldn't help but smile.

"One day Kori."

"One day? What day is that?"

"Someday."

"Oh on Sunday?"

Now both Garfield and Victor started to laugh. Raven hid her smile well, but she also felt sorry for the man sitting in front of her, getting more and more pale, his desperation growing.

"How about you Gar? How many bumgorfs do you want?"

"Me? I want a whole bunch. Until Raven says stop I guess."

He looked at Raven, who had turned and looked at him. There was something about her that made him suddenly afraid.

"I'm not having children Garfield."

"What?"

"I can't risk it. My father could get control over them, or they could inherent my powers. I can't do that to them."

It sounded logical, and yet...

"You're not having children?"

"No."

His world fell apart. He thought of his mother's ring in a box under his bed. Not that he was planing to propose, but he had imagined her with it. He had imagined the children they could have gotten together. He let go of her hand. Raven turned her head and stared at the back of Richard's head. She pulled her hand quickly to herself, and after pulling up her hood she folded them and placed them firmly on her lap. She closed her eyes and whispered her mantra so her powers wouldn't go out of control. The silence in the car just made everything worse.

He tried to think of the children he had always imagined. He couldn't. They had gone. He stared at Raven as she stood there. He loved her. He LOVED her. He would have gone everywhere if she had asked him. He would have done anything. He lived to make her smile. He breathed to kiss her at night. After four years all he wanted was to get her back. Why was he so proud that he couldn't admit that? Yes he still wanted children, but he needed her more. He ran toward the door. He couldn't lose her again, he couldn't.

He was standing on his usual rock as Raven walked toward him. Three weeks with nothing but arguing over the c-word. Neither of them had moved an inch. The other part did make good arguments, but not enough to drown out their own. Raven stopped a few feet away, but he didn't turn around.

"This isn't working out Rae. I think we should break up."

"What?"

"Listen, if you can't change your mind I don't see a future for us."

She felt like someone has kicked her in the stomach, and had problem breathing properly. She knew he felt awful too, but she was in too much pain to care.

"You bastard."

He turned around in suprise. In all the years he had known her he had never heard her scream like that. She was crying, and all his instincts told him to pull her close and comfort her. He reached out, but she pulled away. His arm just fell to his side. He felt like someone was ripping his organs out of his body. She had fallen to her knees, her powers making the entier island shake. Then she teleported and he screamed. Out of pain. Of sorrow. Anger. Of his own stupidity. Of hers. Of his mother's ring that was still in a box under his bed.

He ran as quickly as he could up the stairs, not trusting the elevator would be quick enough, before barging into the common room. Then freezing as three pair eyes looked at him. Richard was the first to walk toward the door and as he passed him he whispered,

"You're too late again."

Kori quickly followed Richard, before Victor, after squeezing his shoulder, also left. Garfield fell to his knees screaming.

Raven's face was warm and her head was filled with cotton. Somewhere someone was thinking on how numbing her emotions also numbed her powers, but she quickly shut him up with another tequila shot. Every night there was a new pub and new people, but the alcohol was the same. She didn't care. She drank until she didn't care, and when alcohol wasn't enough she would say yes to any man who would want her. When his name would be on her lips she would walk to a gang of men and give herself to their mercy. As long as they bought her drinks, as long as they kept him away from her mind, she didn't care what they did to her. She didn't care where or in what state she woke up. All she cared about was not feeling, not caring, not crying. She ordered another tequila when she saw them. The green eyes that made her stomach twirl. For a moment she thought he had found her, but the man with the green eyes was shorter than... him. He had brown hair and dark skin. It wasn't... him, but she was drawn to him anyway. She drank the tequila before walking over to him.

"I'm Raven."

"Mike."

"You want to sleep with me?"

He looked surprised at her, then his friends, then back at her.

"Is this a joke?"

"I don't joke. Do you want to sleep with me?"

Then he grinned and grabbed his jacket.

"Of course."

He grabbed her hand and they left the bar and got into a taxi together. She gave herself over to his green eyes and her mind, under the liquor, was thinking of... him.