Thanks again to those who support me, and sorry it took me so long first I had finals and all this other stuff then first few week of summer so lots of parties and hanging with friends .I apologize if I kept you waiting

Disclaimer: I can only stare in amazement at the characters SM brought to life

So here is the next chapter!

First there was a single white dot surrounded in the darkness. It went back and forth back in forth. I followed it happy that it broke the darkness, the darkness that was crushing me with the heavy mood somewhere deep in my mind. I tried to reach for the light, but I couldn't move. I had no control over my body.

Then all of a sudden the light was gone.

"No!" I cried. That light was the last thing to keep the darkness away, and now with it gone the darkness surrounded me.

The first thing I was aware of were the hands. Cool hands glided across my forehead then swiftly across my cheek. I felt freezing hands applying pressure to my wrist checking my heart rate. I was trying to open my eyes, but for some reason I was not able to. Not because something was forcing me not to, but literally because I had forgotten how to.

Then I heard voices.

"Carlisle it has been more than five minutes," a voice strained.

Carlisle? Who was speaking? Why did it matter that it had been five minutes?i was perplexed and it slightly annoyed me My mind struggled to put things together, but the voices continued.

"Edward, be patient." I was guessing that voice was Carlisle and dad must have been the other voice.

Dad.

Dad.

Dad.

I thought his name several times, it was impossible to stop. I was remembering the pain I put him through. The hurt, the hurt that crippled him, was bright in my mind and refused to disappear. By getting preg- I could not bear to even think the word. i tried to apologize, to say sorry, but my mouth was not working either.

"Nessie?" it was dad's voice, "Nessie,it is okay. I understand what you are trying to say. I see it in your mind." he paused for my response, but my lips weren't moving. "Nessie?Can you hear me?"

Yes! Yes! Daddy I am so sorry! Dadd-

"It is okay Nessie," he answered me before speaking to Carlisle his voice frantic. "why can't she talk or why won't she open her eyes? Is she okay?"

Carlisle's voice came soothingly, "Edward you should calm down," I could imagines dad's glaring response. I heard Carlisle sigh before continuing, "It is just the body's way of protecting her. I am guessing her human side allowed her to faint when she had too many strong emotions, then when she awakes it slowly allows her body to behave normally. Magnificent how the body acts to protect itself."

Dad voice came a little less panicked this time. "When will she open her eyes?"

Carlisle's voice came back still wistful. " Whenever she feels control over her body."

I heard dad's frustrated growl. Then out of nowhere Alice's soprano voice rang through the room.

"She will open her eyen in exactly 18 seconds." She sighed disapprovingly. " I am sure she was listening this whole time." I heard the relieved sigh dad released.

I tried to pry my eyes open with the most force I could achieve and was surprised when my eyes actually opened easily. Bright light stung my half human pupils before I could see clearly again. I glanced around the room. I saw three faces staring back at me each with different expressions.

First I saw Carlisle standing to the left of the hospital bed I was lying on. His golden eyes were fixed on my face. He was composed, but he seemed wary. Not sure if I was as okay as he had told dad. When he locked eyes with me he smiled warmly. When I only stared back, worry flickered across his face,but he composed it so fast that if I were fully human I might not have seen it.

I shifted my eyes to Alice who was standing beside Carlisle. She gazed right back into my eyes worry in her eyes for something. I guessed it was something in my future. I didn't want to imagine all the horrors that would soon be my life.

I quickly turned my head to my right trying to get away form thoughts of my future.

It wasn't exactly the best place to turn to. My dad's eyes, nearly onyx with deep purple bruises under them, were the most pained.

His eyes showed fear, sadness, worry, and lastly something I hated mostof all. Love. Love that I did not deserve. I knew I had hurt him, yet he still loved me. I wished he would hate me. Hate me the way he should, because I was about to bring some monster into the world, a monster that was going to tear my family to pieces. I wish he would hate me like I deserved.

My dad must have heard my thoughts, because he rushed to my side. Determined to prove me wrong. I stopped him before he could speak. "Please dad. Just say you hate me." I begged, but he only shook his head back and forth.

He looked me in the eyes. "I'm sorry Nessie." I looked at him back in the eyes and saw that he truly meant it.

That's when couldn't take it anymore, and I exploded into sobs. I barely heard Alice whisper to Carlisle, "I am going to get Jasper"

I could hear dads voice apologizing over and over. And that only made it worse. I cried more because I did not deserve his apologies, yet he loved me so much that was what he did. I saw him apologize to mom for things that were never his fault to begin with, yet I had never understood why it frustrated her so much. Now I understood how it felt to have someone apologize for something when you know that they should be yelling at you instead.

Hearing my thoughts dad stopped saying sorry and only rubbed my back. I cried hysterically until Alice was back with Jasper who calmed me down.

I still wasn't able to talk though so I pressed a hand to dad's cheek weakly, and pushed out an image of him yelling at me. When he stared at me confusion I whispered please, because it was all I could manage.

"Nessie I can't," He looked so apologetic, but jasper stopped me from being able to cry again.

"Dad let me say sorry. I know I am ruining the family, but- " he cut me off not allowing me to finish.

"Nessie I overreacted and please let me apologize," I tried to object, but he continued talking not allowing me to. "Nessie it was not worse than when I left Bella. Nothing is worse than that. I no I shouldn't have, but I was shocked and so was your mom-"

This time I cut him off "MOM!" I nearly shrieked. I had forgotten about her. How could I? it was horrible how she fell to the floor. The shriek she had released would haunt my dreams forever. I had to go ask forgiveness even if she wouldn't accept it.

"Where is she?" I gasped half way off the hospital bed.

Dad didn't answer so I stopped all movement and looked at him. He didn't want to tell me.

" Please dad?"

He answered warily waiting for my reaction, "She went to go talk to Jacob"

"She wha-"

I couldn't finish because all of a sudden we heard a loud crack, and I fell to the floor unable to bear the pain that came from my stomach. Then their was a growl. A growl that was such a high pitch I had to cover my ears as I shivered in the pain.

I think I am gonna stop it here. Hmmm… so I am stuck between the next capter being Bella confronting Jake, or continuing with nessie , but I will be doing both I just don't know which I should do first so help me out and tell me your opinion.

So comment your thoughts and I will try and write faster

It is all in the love of twilight

****Mrs. LylaCullen****