Duel 13: Kaiba(man) VS Haruhi: Place your bets!

"OMG! KAWAII!" Ryoko yelled.

"RUN AWAY!!!" The mini-gods yelled.

As we walked, Ed Sullen complained to the point of annoyance about being forced to enter, Mikuru looked her deck over, Yuki observed the surroundings, Itsuki smiled, and I listened to Haruhi rant about being unbeatable.

Eventually, we came across a strange sight...

KAIBA?!

"I'm not exactly Seto Kaiba. I'm Kaibaman. So..." The Kaiba lookalike smirked, "Shall we begin?"

"Yeah, sure," Haruhi smirked, "It's going to end the same way."

As the two engaged their Duel Disks, I began to wonder if this really was Kaiba.

Kaiba Lookalike: 4000 LP
Haruhi: 4000 LP

"I'll start," Haruhi said, drawing a card, "And I'll summon Mystical Shine Ball (500/500), in Defensive Mode!"

As a floating crystal ball appeared, I began to hear... some kind of chanting.

"Ooga chaka, ooga chaka, ooga ooga ooga chaka, ooga chaka, ooga chaka, ooga ooga ooga chaka..."

"Your move, since I don't know what else to do," Haruhi said, without her characteristic smirk.

"Very well." Kaibaman drew a card, then, "I play this, Summon Draw!"

"Huh?"

"Let me tell you how it works. Basically, I get to draw a new card. If It's a normal monster, I get to summon it automatically."

He drew a card, then said, "Yep. It's a normal monster. One you've already met. Care to guess which?"

I suddenly felt some feeling. Oh no. It can't be...

"Lemme show you... Blue-Eyes White Dragon! (3000/2500)"

As the way-too-familiar white dragon appeared, I began to wonder if the guy who orchestrates my life has a dragon fetish.

"And guess what? If I did draw a normal monster, I get to draw again. And I just drew... X-Head Cannon! (1800/1500)"

As the blue robot appeared, Kaibaman drew another card.

"Damn," Kaibaman swore, "It's not a monster card. However, It could help me. I play Card of Demise. It allows me to discard my hand and draw five new cards. But if I don't use them in five turns, I lost them in five turns. Next, I'll tribute X-Head Cannon using White Dragon Ritual... To summon Paladin of White Dragon (1900/1200)"

The robot morphed into a knight... riding a dragon... OKAY, SERIOUSLY! DRAGON FETISH, ANYONE!?

"CHOP!"

Nevermind, I'm not going on a rant.

"Next, I'll sacrifice him to Summon my second Blue-Eyes White Dragon!"

Gee, another Blue-Eyes. Why am I not surprised?

As Haruhi watched two White Dragons growl at her, she smirked.

"This... this is exciting..." Haruhi muttered, "You've revved the game another level for me! I play two cards face down, then set a monster in defense mode!"

"Blue-Eyes, destroy his face down! White Lighting!" Kaibaman ordered, as one Blue-Eyes blew up the face-down Mystic Shine Ball.

"Now, attack her Life Points directly!"

"Scrap-Iron Scarecrow!" Haruhi yelled, as the metallic scarecrow blocked the attack.

"Alright, so you managed to survive an attack by Blue-Eyes. X-Head is still free to attack! X-Caliber Shot!"

"Now, my other trap activates!" Haruhi yelled, "Angelic Wings!"

Wings sprouted from Haruhi's back, and swung forward to block the attack.

"This trap not only negates your attack, but I get a little life back!" Haruhi smiled.

Haruhi: 5800 LP

"Damn," Kaibaman swore, "I set a card and end my turn. Your move!"

"Good. I play Dark Core, discarding my third Mystic Shine Ball to blow up X-Head Cannon!"

As the X-Head Cannon faded away, Haruhi smirked.

"Now, I remove two Shine Balls to summon Blue-Eyes White Dragon, Envoy of the Light! (3000/2500)"

As a third Blue-Eyes appeared behind Haruhi, Kaibaman growled in recognition. He's screwed. I know it.

"I remove my third and final Mystic Shine Ball to-"

"Trap Card HAJIRO!" Kaibaman yelled, "Imperial Iron Wall!"

Imperial Iron Wall: No cards can be removed from play.

"Oh man!" Haruhi yelled, "Now I can't boost Envoy Blue-Eye's ATK!"

"That's right," Kaiba sneered, "I now play Polymerization, fusing all three Blue-Eyes together, to form Blue-Eyes Ultimate Dragon! (4500/3800)"

Well... if he attacks Envoy Blue-Eyes, The worst it could to is inflict 1500 Damage.

"Next, I play an equip card! Megamorph!"

The Blue-Eyes Ultimate Dragon grew to twice his original size. The tide has turned.

BEUD: 9000 ATK

"Now, Ultimate Dragon, destroy that blatant rip-off of you! Tri-Burst Stream of Destruction!"

As three blasts of energy ripped the great light Envoy apart, Haruhi gasped in horror.

Haruhi: 0 LP

"I... I... lost..." Haruhi fell to the ground, crying.

"Well, that was easy. Now, hand over half your Star Chips," Kaibaman smirked, holding out his hand.

I took the Star Chips and gave them to him, yelling, "Go ahead and take them, you son of a b****."

"Don't mind if I do," Kaibaman smirked, taking the Star Chips, and then walking away.

Haruhi continued to cry, as we watched Kaibaman walk away.

"Kyon, I'm going to have to excuse myself from here. Closed Space opened up," Itsuki said, walking away from the scene.

MEANWHILE, OUTSIDE OF KYON'S POV
"The Light Envoy got WHAT?!"

"Defeated."

"...This could mean the beginning of the end of our hiding period. Shall we begin?"

"Oh, I'm ready for it."

"As am I, old friend. Soon, the Envoys will tremble once more in our presence. For darkness is always on our side! We are the mighty!"

"The Strong!"

"The Fear-Inducing!"

"We are the Onishin!"

"The What?"

"... Not again..."

To be continued...