Elizabetha stared about her, feeling strangely... disappointed? She had hoped that, considering how awesome the common room was, Slytherin's favorite founder had some sense of decor, but this was just... sad. The open entrance had dropped them about ten meters and onto a suspicious pile of bones that only served to remind her of Sirius's own extensive rat corpse collection. Seeing the amount of small rodent skeletons, she was pretty sure that if Sirius ever met the snake, he literally would shake it's hand/tail and congratulate it. Siriusly.

And then the trail of bones had led them to a circular door set into the wall, which Nettle had quite effectively blasted off by yelling Break down the doors! Then they had filed one by one into the room they were currently in, the one with the ghastly decor. And not the good kind of ghastly, like her rooms at Azkaban were. All that occupied this room was cold carved stone which, granted, didn't bother her as much as the ugly statue that took up the whole back wall, and the awful pillars, shaped like great unsightly snakes. Honestly, whenever someone makes a statue of a snake, they look only at the ugly, muscled, and powerful side. They never think of the slight, elegant, deadly but beautiful side.

The only other occupants of the room were a young man Elizabetha didn't recognize, with wavy dark hair and darker eyes set in a handsome face. Oh, and also Ginny, who for some reason was lying face down on the floor. And breathing at an alarmingly ragged pace. After a few extremely awkward moments of staring at each other, the strange boy broke the silence, fury in his pleasant voice.

"Who're you?" He demanded. Elizabetha took a sharp breath of air, and prepared her tongue. This was going to be hard.

"I'm Elizabetha. The blondie is the Dragonfly of all Dragonflies, the one and only Draco Malfoy. The half-human-half-unspeakable-horrors with the mohawk is Nettle the unstoppable half-pixie. Beware, she bites like hell. And the terrified werewolf softly growling in the corner is called Finatrixiebellianbethaniti. You may have heard of us." She said it all in one rush, not stopping once to breath in between, leaving her panting slightly for a few moments. Jacob scowled at her. "Just kidding! His actual name is Jacob Koray. But feel free to call him by the other name. And you are?"

The boy stared at her, and she ran her hand through her hair tiredly. It'd been a busy day. "Look, I have no idea who you are but I'm pretty sure you have something to do with why one of few people I like in this place is lying there unconscious and- hey! Is she becoming invisible? Dammit, I was supposed to learn how to do that before she did! Kiddo, I lost twenty Fizzy Wizzy's over this, so you had better have a good explanation."

The boy looked absolutely baffled. "I- well- I- Hey, quite glaring at me!" He screeched, and Elizabetha glowered at him.

"I have a right to glare at you, punk. I lost sweets over this! Do you have any idea how siriu- sorry, serious- this is?"

"It's just sweets!" He yelled at her, and around her everyone did a sharp intake of breath, even Nettle. Elizabetha practically snarled.

"Three questions, or I'll set Nettle on you." The half pixie's crest raised appreciatively, and she cooed. Savagely. With pointy teeth showing. Nettle was the only person Elizabetha knew who could make such a motherly gesture seem so terrifying.

The boy scowled. "Fine. I'll let you amuse me for a bit. What are your questions?"

"One: Who the heck are you?"

The boy looked surprised, but answered anyway. "Tom Marvolo Riddle."

Behind her, Draco made a strangled sound and tapped her should, then whispered in her ear. When he finished she nodded, and again focused on the boy. Well huh. Apparently he's the dark lord. Baby Potter maybe should have double checked that he was dead . No pressure on me, just dealing with the lord of all things evil, according to the light.

"What's wrong with Gin?" It was hard to keep her voice steady, she was so close to squealing and asking for an autograph.

...Er, fighting him?

"It's a spell. As she grows weaker, I grow stronger. When she's dead, I'll be fully alive again." Elizabetha didn't bother containing a hum of admiration for that. And to be honest, no one was really surprised, aside from the boy who was looking at her like she'd done something strange. What, am I not allowed to temporarily ignore the impending doom of my friend in order to appreciate some clever spell work? Yeah, I didn't think so!

"Fascinating. I don't want to waste my last question, otherwise I'd ask for the exact spell, or maybe pester you a bit, but I have something far more important planned..." As she once more opened her mouth to utter her final question everyone held their breath, bated.

"Do you intend on buying me replacement Fizzy Wizzy's?"

"...Huh? Don't you... don't you want to save your friend?" Tom Riddle looked like his world was shattering. And, from the standpoint that he was most likely a manipulative git, it probably was. He'd thought that she was normal!

Elizabetha shrugged. "My sense of friendship is a bit... complicated. I just got some information that leads me to believe you may be a tad bit stronger then us. Then I tested you. Your answer was sufficient to provide an answer; you're at least smarter in general, if what you just said about your spell was true. I'm usually the expert on old dark arts, but you know something I don't. That's wonderful." He still looked kind of blank, although Nettle had apparently understood and was once again staring longingly as his body, needle teeth cutting her lips as she smirked. "I mean, I could orchestrate some great scheme to get us all out of this, but quite frankly, I'm tired, and if you're stronger then me, well... Draco, am I stronger then you?" Draco nodded, although begrudgingly. Bella had once taught her a spell to test magic levels, and Elizabetha had them all try it. Draco was high, as was Ginny and Blaise, while Peter and Mina were both only slightly above average. And, quite frankly, they had all been to scared to have Luna try, so she was to remain a mystery, if only for their sanity's sake. Well, everyone but Elizabetha's sanity. Hers was already long gone. She was protecting her understanding of the universe as we know it.

"See? And no offense to you, Jacob, but considering you currently don't have a wand and it's not the full moon, you're mostly useless. Sure, you're stronger and faster then us, and your senses are heaven sent, but a killing curse is still a killing curse. Actually, Nettle is the only one here who could do much damage to you. But to be frank... You fascinate me. So I'd rather keep you living. Plus, if Nettle went all out and actually fought, something I've only seen once, if memory serves me right you wouldn't be the only one caught dead in the onslaught. Last time she managed to kill dementors, which is technically impossible. So how about we make a deal? What do you need to survive without completely killing my Gin? I'll help in anyway I can, providing that none of my own are killed."

There was a moment of complete silence, interrupted only by the sound of echoing drips from farther back in the cavern.

"...I'm sorry, but how did she kill dementors? Now you've interested me, and..." Tom Riddle trailed off, a curious glint to his dark eyes that Elizabetha greatly approved of.

"I sang "Tik Tok, and they died in the wake of the horrible lyrics." Nettle trilled.

"What in Merlin's grace is "Tik Tok?"

"I wake up in the morni-mph!" Elizabetha clapped her hand over Nettle's mouth before she could properly start.

"You promised not to kill anyone!"

"I thought the dark lord was already technically dead? Is this not just a Visiting?"

"No, he is not just a visiting! And that horror would kill us too, no doubt!" Elizabetha scolded her, before turning back to the others. Draco had a horrified expression on his pale face, and Jacob was shaking his head. Apparently, he knew the song as well. Tom Riddle was staring at her as if she had just turned into a mermaid. She quick checked her legs were there before speaking, just to be sure. Suddenly turning into a mermaid wouldn't be the weirdest thing that had happened to her in her life.

"Right, where were we... ah, yes, truce in favor of not all dying needless deaths, aside from Nettle, who would survive simply because of the sheer stupidity cross genius of pixie logic?"

"...Can you find me someone else to take, then?"

Elizabetha grinned. "I have just the person. Wait here. Nettle, stay here with Draco, Jacob, come with me. Revenge will be mine."

Ten minutes later, a gagged Hufflepuff was being dragged in by Jacob, Elizabetha cackling as she followed. The poor boy was still conscious, and looking about with frightened eyes.

"Ha, revenge is so sweet. Insulting my Dragonfly has consequences, Sugar-fluff, and they're not all just book shredding."

"Did you seriously just choose him because you wanted to avenge me?" Draco asked in disbelief.

"Pretty much. Why?"

"Nothing. Just leave me alone for a bit so my ego can grow big and strong."

"Got it. So, Tommy dearest, what now?" Elizabetha asked the boy, who's dark eyes were looking at them with a gaze full of confusion.

"Well, first off, never call me that again. Now give him this, please." He told them, pointing with his still hazy foot at a small black book that lay near Ginny's body.

It took a surprisingly large amount of effort to force the book into the Hufflepuffs hands, probably because he had eyes and ears and it was rather obvious nothing good was going to happen to him. Also, it was rather obvious why he didn't go to Gryffindor, if his excessive shivering and begging for mercy was anything to go by. "And?" asked Jacob.

"Just have him write about himself in it."

"Huh. Alright, "Sugar-fluff", either write in this like you're a teenage girl with a diary, or I'll bite your throat out and make your death much, much more painful then whatever is going to happen to you could ever be. Okay?" Elizabetha was pretty sure the boy wet himself, but they had dropped him in a puddle before so it was hard to tell. Note to self, Jacob is suspiciously good at this. Ask him later.

"Y-y-y-yes-s-s, S-s-sir!" The boy stuttered, grabbing the quill that Elizabetha had transfigured from a shard of rock.

Then he wrote.

And Elizabetha looked over his shoulder, because she was a nosy person, and also because she was bored. Jacob joined her, Draco was still busy caring for his ego, and Nettle had started to groom her crest. Tom Riddle was just looking about in bemusement.

Apparently, his name wasn't Sugar-fluff, surprisingly. It was Marvin Sherwood. His... his name... is Marvin?! Oh Merlin, now I pity him... And I don't even do pity... And apparently he had seven siblings, and a snooty mother and a pushover dad who always lost the fights with said snooty mother. And his siblings were all named equally unfortunately. Maville was the eldest daughter, followed by Melvin, the eldest son. Then two twin sisters, Missy and Mini. And then Marvin, then three younger brothers, Markitch, Marcel, and... Mitsie? Oh gods. She definitely pitied him now. Him and his entire family. Including his snooty mother, because she was obviously cursed with idiocy if she had named her children in such a manner.

When she glanced up, she noticed that Ginny had started reappearing, and Tom Riddle fading. As she watched, he disappeared completely, leaving a solid Ginny who woke up with a start, gasping. Then she looked back, and noticed that Marvin had started to fade instead, and behind him was a glimmer of a shadow of a boy with wavy dark hair and darker eyes.

"Huh. I have no idea what this spell is, but might I say it's really freaking cool?"

"Yes. Yes, you might." Came the smug reply from the shadow.

About another ten minutes later Tom Riddle was standing there in all his stereotypical perfection, Ginny was blushing at him furiously, and Marvin was writing for help frantically from the other side of the little black notebook.

"Mind if I keep this?" Elizabetha asked Tom Riddle, waving the apparently concious notebook in his general direction. "And can I call you Tom?"

"Not at all. And feel free." Tom answered, and she slipped it into her pocket.

Tom was actually having a deep discussion with Nettle about her education and her singing spells, which was near impossible with Nettle, so he may have not been listening to the question fully. Whatever. It led to an extra half hour in the dreadfully decorated room before Elizabetha and Jacob finally herded them out, squeezing Draco and his now near tangible ego out after them, before heading out themselves with Ginny.

"Well. That was nice." Elizabetha began awkwardly. Ginny snorted.

"Sure. Sure it was."

"Yeah. Um, Gin, could you promise me a few things?"

"What?"

"Well one, never do that again." Ginny smiled at her. "Two, promise to never name any of your children Maville, Melvin, Missy, Mini, Marvin, Markitch, Marcel, or Mitsie. Especially if Mitsie is a boy."

"...Agreed. Definitely agreed."

They walked in silence for about twelve more seconds until Elizabetha realized she had never gotten a straight answer from Tom about the Fizzy Wizzy's.

So... please review? I'm nervous about how this turned out...