C h a p t e r T w o:

R e m e m b e r

W h e n

!

A quiet sigh was the only sound in the otherwise silent house, made by the only person currently occupying it – Bella Swan. The sigh was made as she attempted to close her bulging grey suitcase. It was dull and plain, the complete opposite of her usual possessions. Inside were the things she needed – which had turned out to be a considerable amount – before her less essential and more bulky items arrived. Along the floor of her room were several brown boxes, filled, sealed and waiting to be chucked – quite unceremoniously – into the little space left in the moving van waiting outside which was already fill with more of the identical brown boxes.

With the obvious exception of the suitcase and brown boxes, there wasn't a single thing left in the room. The curtains were gone – ripped, after her unpleasant outburst – and the bed had been broken. It was now currently sitting in the middle of a dump yard, possibly being recycled or destroyed – Bella wasn't sure.

With a final shove Bella finally managed to close her suitcase. Grinning happily at the fact she had managed to close the suitcase without snagging the hem of one of her dresses, she glanced at her new watch which lay open on her bed.

With the diamonds encrusted around the clock, and around the fastenings of the leather band, it was quite obvious the watch had cost well over a thousand pounds. To Renee Swan however, it was no fortune. She would blow away money on countless sentimentally worthless objects, and to her it was no big deal. Of course, it would seem like this to someone who had never done an honest day's work in her longer-than-she-would-be-willing-to-admit life.

Bella had received it in a rather ceremonius meeting with her mother. Renee had given a long speech to her, which sounded rather planned with an oddly formal tone one would not think to associate with a mother. Renee even managed to throw a few tears into her performance – and it was, quite undoubtedly, a performance.

It did seem that Bella had been waiting for something like this to happen, and she let out a rather loud sigh as she slid further down the wall she was leaning against. It had always been uncommon for Renee to show any emotion – one might say this 'ability' was passed on to her daughter – but on one of the rare occaisions when emotion was shone, it was uncommon and extremely unwise to think it was genuine.

Although to some, despite the dramatic emotion – which one might find easy to forgive – Bella could see another obvious reason why she less than fond of her gift. To another who didn't know Renee well, someone who hadn't lived with her for seventeen long dragged out years, it would seem a gift. But obviously, with this person not knowing Renee well, they would be unable to see through her. Quite unlike Bella, who was able to read people like a book.

Bribery. It was what her mother had always resorted to when something went wrong, something that didn't go according to plan. It was always expensive, always something practical yet never something desirable. Bella couldn't ever remember asking for a diamond watch, nor on the previous times when Renee had felt bad in her warm, gooey places when she had given Bella a large diamond collar which she promised would be followed by a pet dog which never came, or the time she had been given a long narrow key, a large diamond at the top of it with smaller ones leading down, which had turned out to be a key to a jewellry box which also never came. Renee had always had a thing for diamonds, so it came as no surprise when Bella new watch was covered with them.

This time it was because of the whole boarding school issue. Bella didn't want to go. Charlie had insisted on it. Renee hadn't voiced an opinion, but despite her protests that she didn't want to be a part of it, Renee had managed to stay in the room long enough to listen to all of the juicy arguing.

No matter how much she tried to hide it, Bella couldn't lie to herself. She hated how Renee thought everything could be cured by a material good. Unhappy? Here's a diamond watch! Of course, it hadn't always been like this. Before it had happened, Bella had seen Renee even less than she did now but when she had Renee was always affectionate.

Unconsciously, Bella slid further down the wall until she was sitting on the ground. After letting out an oddly animal-like hoot of surprise, she crossed her legs and folded her arms – determined not to think about it.

The wall of her room was white and bare, not a single poster pinned up on the wall from an old magazine. Nor was there the small white-board she had kept on her door filled with tiny bright Post-Its of important things to do, or to be.

The right wall was empty of its usual bookcases, filled with books she had been given as gifts, or ones she had bought herself, even a couple she was sure she had been assigned to read in class – there had definitely been a couple of English, and a history book about sources and their times. And a couple of maths textbooks, containing detailed formulas from her advanced class ...

All had been bought or given and Bella had the intention of reading them at the time. However, they had been put to good use – it did, after all, make her look incredibly booksmart.

A single tear fell from her eye, falling down her pale cheek and onto the wooden floor below. She had promised herself she wouldn't cry. And she had promised herself she wouldn't think of it, but there it was.

A single drop of clear liquid on the cold wooden floor.

A single drop of clear liquid which marked her misery of the tragedy that had befallen her – that had changed Bella Swan forever. She could remember it – as vividly as if it had been yesterday.

It had been burned into her mind, the memory.

And as Bella closed her eyes in the attempt to stop the sudden flow of tears, behind the blackness she saw it all. Brief flashes from her memories of all that had happened to change her to become the person she was today.

The girl who was trapped in a woman's body and had no idea how she had gotten there, still craving that hug from her mother which she had always wanted, the single piece of praise from her father she had never received.

As Bella sat there, her memories still flashing before her eyes she couldn't help but think of all the things she had missed out on. Things that should have taken place inside this room: a bedtime story read by her mother, a goodnight kiss, even just if wish goodnight – they were all experiences she had missed out on because of it. Because of the stupid thing that had messed up her life forever.

What Bella hated was the muttering. The back-stabbing, the quiet whispers, the hushed voices ... all made by the people she had once considered as friends. Of course when she passed in the corridor they always stopped for moment, and an unnatural silence would occur until Bella passed before the whispering started once more. She could remember everything they had said, even now.

The teachers were the worst though. They thought they knew best when they didn't even know half of it. Bella knew children had been interviewed, asked questions about it but even with all of their investigation, even after the police and the lawyers were called in, what they knew was only the beginning and who was she to tell them the end.

All of her teachers and her principal called her parents up to the school to discuss it. Cards passed hands, names were mentioned and before she knew it, Bella was going to a different therapist every second, and a doctor on her days free from the interfering idiots.

Charlie and Renee had no clue of course. They took the advice, the cards, the names happily. They never to Bella about it, not once. Renee never told her how sorry she was, or Charlie getting angry. It the same scenario, if not worse than before. Renee was out shopping all day, perhaps on occaision going to the neighbours for 'gardening' and Charlie was a workaholic.

Bella glanced at her watch once more. ... Half past three ... Damien, their cook, was taking her to the airport at four. She hated the fact Charlie or Renee couldnl't have taken her but she supposed that require them to take perhaps an hour out of their busy lives to drive their only daughter to the airport.

Then she would be off to America, California to be exact. Maybe it would be fun – boarding school. Who was she kidding, it would be a nightmare. After Charlie had told her where she was going, Bella had googled the place ... and they wore a uniform. Seriously – a uniform. Like, as if they were trying to be an actual school or something!

Including:

White shirt

Black tie (thin)

Black cardigan/jumper

Black blazer (optional)

Black straight skirt, one inch above knee (girls)

Black tights (girls)

Black smart Trousers (Boys)

Black school shoes

Rather than feeling as if she was going to some happy and intelligent school Bella felt more as though she was going to be attending a school for the seriously depressed and socially challenged.

Was she going to a school full of emos? Was she going to be taught how to slit her wrists? Would there be an entire class devoted to self harming? What would they call it? It would have to be in a secret code so the government never found out! Like ... S.H for self harming? Or E.E? For emo education?

Where they going to have to listen to songs about the pleasure of slitting wrists?Would RE be about the devil and his plans to take over the school?

What the hell was wrong with this school?!?

"Miss Swan, we have to leave now."

I nodded, my eyes wide.

AN:

NO OFFENCE TO ANY EMOS

You know what? I just realised that on my first AN, my first words were that I meant no offence to Emos! Aren't I just great and not stereotypical at all?

Basically this was just kind of like a bridge chapter to show what kind of loike inner termoil Bella's actually going through because once she actually starts school obviously she won't want to show it ...

Reviews are appreciated people!!!!

Au revoir