Heya, author 2 here, and this chapter is finally done!
It wasn't too painful, but then again I DO have fillings (lol)
I thought it was something presentable, after a tonne of editing however.
But in the end as long as my Nicky enjoyed it I'm happy ^_^

Chapter 3 - Misery loves Company

There was a knock - forceful but not breaking - at the door. A fall of footsteps and a loud click sounded as the door creaked open.

"What do you mean you can't find it? It's not like it's a book or anything..."

"Well Leon, it's not exactly like I know what we're looking for here."

Leon stepped across the room, his hard shoes flopping on John's new carpet with a force John didn't care to think about. The man stopped and looked almost directly at John. John could almost fully describe what the man was wearing, but the only thing that came to mind was 'No man should own that many belts, let alone wear them all at the same time.'

He peered down and his eyes thinned slightly. An almost creepy smile crept across the man's face as he barked a laugh.

"Ah, that's where I left this thing..." He reached down and John almost screamed as Leon's and brushed over his copy of the Scarlet Letter, but it stopped right after, and snapped up the Waffle, the one thing that John couldn't explain in his home, aside from the lack of milk ..and the rabid librarians.

Leon brought the waffle to his lips, and bit down.

"A bit cold, but whatever..." He quickly downed it and headed towards the kitchen. "Tifa, I'm gonna steal a bit more of this guy's milk…Cover for me."

At this, John opened his eyes a bit more and took a more detailed look at the man. He was about the same height as the woman, and similarly coloured. John often associated colours with people as to not bother himself with the oft ever changing facial expressions of everyone he had encountered. He even did this at work, quite frequently calling their most valuable customer "Mr. Orangey-Yellow " instead of the more difficult to remember "P. Mann."

Now, however, wasn't the prime time to be thinking of work. In recognition of this fact, quickly John came back to reality; it felt like a crashing in his heart. The truth of the situation fell upon him. He closed his eyes tightly and swallowed deep. He then shouted at the intruders.

"Okay! I'll give you what you want!"

Sitting up, John snapped his gaze to the woman in front of him. He raised his arms, almost surrendering himself to her and her compadre.

"If you let me go I'll give you exactly what you're looking for!"

The woman looked confused. John stood up quickly from the couch and moved towards his shelf. He reached over, past his first edition copy of "Joey the Sparrow goes Shopping for Laundry Soap", his favorite childhood story, and grabbed a large tome. He held it out far from himself, hands shaking almost violently.

The dark haired woman stepped towards John. John reached as far forward with his book as he could, trying to pass it to her. He assumed she was 'Tifa' because it sounded a whole lot more womanly than 'Leon'. She took the volume from him and looked it over.

"Club Soda and Many Other Cures for Chocolate Stains - Volume Four?" She raised her eyes and looked back at John, puzzled. He shook his head and closed his eyes.

"I know that's what you want. I've had it checked out for 7 days, but I guess it's a reference book and I went overdue. So just take it, and things can just go back to normal."

Tifa looked from the book to John and back again, an almost exasperated look on her face. An almost piercing silence rang through the house, until it was shattered a moment later.

"Hey! Guy! You're out of Milk!" Leon shouted from the kitchen before slamming John's refrigerator door. John cringed.

"Wait. What?" Tifa looked back down at the book and then continued "I'm pretty sure we're not looking for this..." She passed the book back to John, and he held it against himself, still wondering what these odd folks wanted from him.

Tifa started again. "Look, John, I know you know who we are and what we want, and I'm pretty sure you know that we know that you know that this book isn't it." John almost passed out again from the absurd overuse of complex sentences. His face grew red, not of anger but of absolute flusteration.

She stepped forward and John stepped back. A few more steps and John felt something that shouldn't have been there. Leon was standing right behind him, and with almost sadistic glee, he leaned across and smiled at John.

"Look, buddy, I'm not here to toy around, just give us what we want, and we'll be on our way.

For the second time that day John's head rushed, his eyes fell backwards and he collapsed on the ground. As he crumpled to the floor John vaguely processed the sight of three more figures entering through his front door. My gods, he thought, I just vacuumed.

"Simple and clean is the way John's house needs to beeeeee tonight."

Review? =D