Disclaimer: We don't own any part or character of 'The Nanny'…but if we could choose…well, you know.

A/N: Just another little collaboration with DannyFan66. This one is about 80 percent improv and 20 percent discussed. Let us know what you think.

We also wanted to wish you all MERRY CHRISTMAS!! Hope you all enjoy a great holiday season

No More Pretending

Chapter 3

"Niles/CC," they both spoke at the same time.

"You first" Niles insisted, wiping a drop of water from his forehead.

"Ok. But first, we need some towels. Just take off your shoes and follow me," CC said as she took her own heels off, and then led the way to the back of the apartment, to the bathroom. Reaching into the linen cupboard behind the door, she got out two big fluffy towels and handed one to Niles. "I'll be right back." She walked through the other door, which Niles assumed led to her bedroom, and came back with a terry cloth man's robe. "Here. It's Noel's, but I think it will be ok. You can take your clothes off and we'll throw them in the dryer."

"Uhm…CC…I'm…I'm…" …completely unable to speak apparently. Niles thought exasperated.

He's quite cute when he's flustered. "Breathe Bell Boy," she directed softly, putting the robe she was still holding over the edge of the tub. Niles did as instructed and watched her walk back towards him. Something had happened to CC out in the rain, and she'd never felt more alive. Honestly, looking at him dripping in front of her, the last thing she wanted to do right now was talk.

"Look, I know we need to talk about what just happened out there; about the whole day really." She brought her hands up to the top button of his shirt and popped it open. Niles took a deeper breath. "I want to know why you pretended to be drunk at the bar." She popped the next button, Niles exhaled. "I want to know why you've never mentioned Jack's to me, even in private." Another button, another breath. "I want to know why you called me Love when I fell earlier." Button, again. He hissed at the contact of her hand on his skin. "I really want to know how you got the nerve to kiss me." Her hands undid the last button, and she let them graze his chest up to his shoulders so she could fully remove the shirt. Niles stopped breathing altogether. "And I want to know if you're going to do it again." She asked, looking right at him.

Niles had to break away from her gaze to catch his breath. He glanced down to where his hands were nervously clasped at his waist, took a deep breath, and then again met her eyes. "I thought that if you thought if I was drunk, I could tell you I loved you and you wouldn't hold it against me." He offered simply, she gasped at his words. "I never told you about Jack's because I was afraid you'd find some other bar to go to and I'd be lost not knowing if you were safe." He admitted, she chewed at her bottom lip. "I've called you love in my dreams for years, it finally slipped out for real." He answered, her lips began to quiver. "And I decided that if kissing you in the rain got me a slap in the face that it would be more than worth the price."

A tear ran down CC's face as Nile's finished speaking. She noticed how he'd answered every question but the one she most wanted to hear the answer to now. "Niles?" She asked in a soft, very unsure, very un-CC like voice, "I very much enjoyed our kiss before. I thought you had too?"

Niles looked at her in sheer astonishment. "My God, woman, how could you ever doubt it?"

"Because you answered all my questions, in order, with extreme precision and detail, and totally ignored my wanting to know if you would kiss me again." She tried to pull away from him.

"CC," Niles held her tighter in his arms. "I want nothing more than to spend every day for the rest of my life kissing you." He kissed her forehead. "And holding you." He kissed her cheek. "And loving you." He kissed her chin. "But more than that I want nothing more than to spend every day for the rest of my life, being loved…by you." His eyes met hers and he waited.

CC looked back at him and then had to break the gaze. She had no idea how to give him what he wanted, what he needed from her now. It was her turn to stumble ""Uhm…Niles…I'm…I'm…"

"CC…it's me…of all the people in the world you've never held back with me. It wasn't always positive, but it was always honest." Niles frowned with concern. "I love you…there isn't anything you can do or say to change that."

"I can't say it back to you Niles...I don't know how." She blotted herself against his chest, hugging him tightly.

Niles smiled and kissed her head. "You don't have to say it, CC. I can feel it, really I can." He lifted her face to meet his eyes. "And some day, when you really feel it, you'll know how to say it."

"What is it that you feel Niles? How you feel about me, or how you think I feel about you?" CC was a bit peeved at his response, and though she knew he was trying to make it easy for her, it felt wrong somehow, almost like he was forcing her to go somewhere she wasn't ready to. Will I ever be ready? Backing up a few steps, she just looked at him, with more confusion and hurt in her eyes than before. "I'm sorry Niles. I have no idea how to do this." She waved between them. "You're being more than nice. It's throwing me." She chuckled sadly, "I don't know how to react to you being nice to me. I believe it when you say you love me, I really do, I just don't know what to do now." She could feel the tears again and an overwhelming feeling of dread. "I'm sorry...I..." and she fled back through to her room.

"Not this time," Niles whispered sternly to himself and went after her. He stepped into the bedroom he'd been in so very many times before. She stood at the windows overlooking the city. He went to her and without a word spun her into his arms and kissed her will all the desire and pent up passion from the kiss just a year ago and with all the love and tenderness from his confessions only moments ago. When the desperate need for air separated them he looked at her differently. "You want to know what to do now?" His eyes dark with his want for her. CC nodded hesitantly. "Now, Love…" Niles smirked just a bit. "We stop, talking." He took her lips with his again and his hands moved to the top button of her still damp purple blouse. Take your time Niles; give her the chance to stop you.

CC pulled away from his kiss and stilled his hand with hers. "Niles?" she waited for him to look at her. "I want you, of that I'm sure." She gave him a pure, unabashed look of desire that shook him to the very core. "Are YOU sure, however, that you want to do this?" The look in his eye left no doubt as to his desire. "What I mean is what if this is all I can ever give? What if I never share my heart with you? What if I never can return all that you want to give to me?" She took her hands off her blouse and backed away again. "What if it's only sex? What if I can only give you my body? Can you live with that?"

"No." Niles answered flatly. "That may have been alright with Chandler, and Colin and whomever… but, no, CC. I can't live with that." He stood and he waited, hoped and prayed that it was a test. She was testing his intentions, his feelings, and his heart.

"Then I guess we'll have to keep talking," she sighed. "I can't give you what you want right now, and you can't give me what we both want. I can respect that; even admire you for it, Butler Boy." She grinned a bit and walked over to the bathroom, got the robe from the tub and came back into the bedroom. "Here, we still need to get your clothes dry." She couldn't look at him yet, knowing she had let him down and likely hurt him badly. "It really is Noel's," she said, hoping to erase the names of the other men he had just mentioned from the space between them.

"I'll grab your shirt from the bathroom when I get out of my clothes. The dryer is just through the door to the main part of the apartment, I'll meet you there in a few minutes." She closed the door behind her as she went to get changed.

"I really should've gotten drunk." Niles groaned quietly to himself. "At least then I could give her what she wants." (*I'm not sure Niles would do it, even drunk, in this story…) He quickly slipped out of the rest of his clothes and once he'd wrapped himself tightly in the robe he made his way to the washer and dryer. He left his things on the dryer and went into the kitchen to start a pot of coffee. "No…I think this calls for cocoa." Niles moved around in CC's kitchen as if he belonged there. He found all the things he needed and waited for CC to come looking for him.

CC put on her pink robe, hung her silk blouse up in the bathroom and brought the rest of the clothes to the dryer. She tossed in her stuff in with Niles' and laughed at the irony that she was doing his laundry. As she was about to head out to the living room, she caught a glimpse of him in her kitchen. He looks like he belongs here. Sighing again at herself, she went to him.

He was facing away from her when she came up behind him. I love his shoulders, and his butt. She smiled and then watched him shut the fridge. She put her arms around him from behind before he could turn around. He stiffened a bit, but didn't pull away. "Niles?" She asked to his back, "Can we hug?"

"Yes, I think I'd like that." Niles turned in her arms and pulled her to his chest tightly, hoping she couldn't feel his heart pounding.

CC let herself simply enjoy being wrapped in his arms. She wanted to ask him if they could kiss too, but she was too afraid to do so. "Chicken," she chided herself under her breath.

Niles' eyes shot to the top of his head at her utterance. He decided to risk completely losing his resolve and nuzzled into her soft, damp hair. "Why are you chicken?"

CC stiffened at his question, "Uhm..." She was going to shrug it off, when his words from earlier rang in her ears Nothing I do or say can change how he feels. "I was going to ask you..." she brought her hands up to his forearms and looked into his eyes, "...if we could kiss too. I didn't want to make you uncomfortable, and I didn't really want to risk you saying no, but you looked so good." She looked away; embarrassed at the way she was acting, and yet still proud that she had pushed past her own discomfort.

"CC…" Niles pulled her face up to meet his gaze. "I can control myself. I don't just jump into bed with a woman when I start seeing her."

"Seeing her? Are you...are we seeing each other?"

Niles released her. "That is for you to answer." Niles poured the now finished cocoa into the mugs he'd set out. "I love you…I'm there. But I can't very well woo you, if we aren't at least dating."

"You're going to woo me?" She smiled, accepting the mug he handed to her.

Niles flashed his boyish grin. "If you'll let me…I'd like to try."

"I'm pretty demanding you know. You're going to have to do much better than try." She joked with him, in a very flirty tone, so unlike their normal edgy banter.

Niles cocked an eyebrow. "Am I?" Niles left the kitchen and headed to the sofa. He sat down like he owned the place and propped his feet on the coffee table. "Now, Babs. Let's be honest. We've already established that I could have taken you to bed. That's not the challenge. I want to win your heart. So you can be certain that I will give my very life to that end."

CC's mouth hung wide open. She didn't know whether she was more insulted, angry or to turned on by this arrogant, frustrating, confident man sitting on her couch. She stayed by the counter, bringing the hot beverage to her lips and taking a sip. He's full of surprises. Finally, walking over to the couch, she sat at the opposite end from him, tucking one leg under her.

"Impressive. I've already rendered you speechless." Niles sipped at his cocoa without turning to face her.

"When are you taking me out?" CC asked nonchalantly.