Disclaimer: Bleach, its characters and its settings aren't mine
The next day dawned and the world hadn't collapsed around me.
So that's okay.
Of course I now have another unwanted protege – and that protege is Tatsuki – God, they call me a loose cannon, I'm nothing compared to Tatsuki. I always had the sense to back off when I was fighting a foe I couldn't-
Okay, I stepped away for a moment to get a drink and I just reread that last line about me and good sense.
Let's pretend I didn't say it and just move on.
Tatsuki is a loose cannon, that much is true. And I really don't look forward to training her the way she's going to insist on being trained. That sort of shit is going to get me caught/her killed. Half the stuff I did was (in hindsight) just a little on the risky side.
Still, if we keep it away from campus and I keep the taps turned off I might not get caught-
Anyway, what's done is done, I've got no way around this. Me and Tatsuki.
Great.
So, yeah, fight night. Time to make an appointment to kick a little ass.
Fighting – ah, fighting. The pressure of not fighting is killing me. It's been well over a year since I took down a hollow and longer still since I had a decent fight. You've got no idea just how much I want to storm Eleventh division and leave the gang in a world of hurt – and where's Grimmy when I need that bastard? I need Espada to pound, I'm going out of my mind because I can't hammer someone.
You know I'd open a Garganta and go hunting but I know it'd set off the sensors here. And the moment I actually go to Hueco Mundo like they think I have-
Pure distillate of frustration, that's me.
It's times like this I think of Ukitake and wonder just how many really good fights he's had in the past thousand years. I wish I was mellow like him. Unfortunately the longer I survive the more I figure the captain who stamped their mark on me is – you know it baby - the Demon of Zaraki.
Oh, how I wish I could fight Zaraki. I so need to burn some stress and the big guy can take anything and everything you give him.
But do I get to fight Zaraki? No, no I don't.
Anyway, I've got a more proximate problem, and it's a big one! Tatsuki is angry again.
Sound important?
No?
I didn't think so either, but I hate Tatsuki so I just figured I was biased or something.
No?
Excellent. Why don't we just go forward on the assumption that Tatsuki is a douche bag, I rock and forget the whole wanted fugitive thing? Do that and and all is pretty much good with the world. Right?
Right?
Shit.
I'm sitting for breakfast, feeling good for dodging a bullet. Even with Tatsuki at the far end of the table I've got nothing to worry about. Not until at least dinner.
Back to why she's pissed. Seems whomever decided she'd look good in the shoujo magical manga has also determined that Tatsuki must be lonely.
You know, lonely. Normally this would be laugh-a-minute territory but in this case she's way uncomfortable with the assumption. See, nothing has happened yet but the artist has started drawing her mooning around the campus.
I don't know quite how to put this, but I'm getting the feeling 'ole Tatsuki's in for some girlish love – I can't see them bringing in a bishōnen or anything just for her. And we're short of them here you know. I mean, I doubt I qualify and really, there's something about student shinigami that just doesn't work for bishōnen. Probably something about what would happen if Ikkaku and the rest of the apes from Eleventh heard there were bishōnen on campus, they'd come down here and give them a good old Eleventh Squad welcome.
And that'd be good, because really, who likes bishōnen anyway?
Maybe they could use Renji? If he combed out that stupid pineapple thing and wore his hair down? I mean he's probably a little on the tough and mean side (he did come from Eleventh after all), but I'm sure Tatsuki would find him a more acceptable choice than just about anyone else. Him and Tatsuki dated a couple times, but nothing ever came of it.
Nah, I'm thinking it's going to be a girl – there's a whole subtext thing that's so not between the lines.
Tatsuki ain't going to like that at all.
I'm just wondering what girl they've got cast as the love interest. They haven't shown the anything overt yet, but there's been one or two shots - it's always just the uniform. Like in this frame here, Tatsuki is in the background staring, and you basically get the expanded view left half of a woman's pelvis (uniform pants and coat) walking away from her. The implication is that Tatsuki is staring at her ass. And maybe she is, but it's actually more fun not to ask her. You know, just sort of smile every once in a while, like something humorous just occurred to me.
Hey, subtle is my middle name. I'm so subtle, in fact, that I try to keep a copy of Tatsuki Shoujo around just in case I happen to see her. You know, so I can point at the pictures.
I'm thinking the artist is a girl with the hots for our crabby dragon. That's my theory anyway. I think that somewhere nearby there's a girl hoping to see how Tatsuki reacts before approaching and presumably drawing herself into the storyline.
Why a girl? And not some pervy guy, I mean?
Just a feeling.
You know, it occurs to me that my hair is almost long enough for the pineapple look...
A snowy pineapple!
Anyway, I'm losing some of my patience with Tatsuki Shoujo. It's an awful storyline, Tatsuki never seems to do anything but moon around, fall softly in love and generally be shoujo. Of course I'm biased – I read Jump, but this is Tatsuki we're talking about. She should be kicking ass, not shown elegantly posing before a battle starts.
Though I wouldn't mind seeing the artist take a shot a Soi Fon though. A shoujo Soi? That'd be worth some laughs.
Clearly The Substitute is the preferred publication on campus. And it's not like I'm biased, no, due to its better storyline and more lovable hero, The Substitute is just a better read.
Still, anything that pisses off Tatsuki is okay by me.
Days like this I wish I could draw, I'd have a metric assload of Tatsuki-based manga circulating – it'd be great.
Anyway, today I've got a load off. Figured out what I'm going to get wrong on tomorrow's test, no immediate threats of getting caught – all told, it's all good. I'm not expecting too many surprises today, but I am heading down to tournament land today. Illegal underground tournament land.
Hey, what's the worst that could happen?
You know, the whole tournament thing, I should have figured this out before. Anywhere you get the type of people who become shinigami you're going to get these healthy outlets for aggression.
Surprised no one from Red Flower had mentioned it. Though I guess the Red Flower gang didn't want me showing up and taking their tournament winnings away. Illegal tournament - all the signs were there, I just hadn't been looking.
That's a lapse on my part, I really have to pay better attention. I should have known this existed. Hell, even Renji had figured it out, once upon a time.
Don't get me wrong, it's just that Renji sometimes isn't the most observant guy in the world. Not like me.
Except he found the tournament and I didn't.
Had to be a few of the Senseis involved, there'd almost have to be to keep the thing underground. Anyway, if you knew what you were looking for, the tournament wasn't that hard to find. And I'd been given directions.
They had a few guys around the door – this was pre-qualifying.
"Piss off." That was the little one. Well, you know the deal, any situation like this you need one little guy to do the talking and a couple of big stupid ones to back him up – it's practically the law. I guess they weren't too impressed by my second year uniform.
"I'm here on business."
"Pal," said one of the big ones, "the man said piss off."
Why do they always have to have oversized dumbasses on the door? Dramatic tension? How should I know?
These guys were rude, so I tried another approach. "Lookit assclowns, I want onto the ladder."
The little one looked me over.
"Come with me."
I did, one of his bullish buddies follows us into a an old storage room.
"Let's see what you've got with Yugi here."
I draw my Zanpakuto. It's still sealed of course, but a third year bouncer isn't much of a threat.
We banged back and forth for a few minutes until the skinny one decided I was good enough.
"Ten o'clock Friday night. Bring your Zanpakuto and keep in mind that anyone who ever tried to talk got their legs broken. Don't wear your uniform either. If you do you won't be allowed to fight."
That was probably something to do with keeping the paperwork in order – after all, it couldn't involve students if they weren't wearing student uniforms, could it? Of course not.
I hate semantics. And it's like, Buddy, the first time I met an Espada I cut his arm off. You want to break my legs you better bring more than a pair of fourth years.
Yeah, bitch. Cuz that's the size of it.
Anyway, I'm in – I've got my in.
I just hope Rukia doesn't find out.
Friday night fights. I'm on the junior ladder, which means there's some prize money if you can get to the top. Enough to make it worthwhile at least. Junior ladder starts at sixteen people and narrows down to one. Mostly it's students, though one or two look like ringers from the Rukongai. Obviously that's supposed to be a cover, though who'll actually fall for it I'll never know. Junior ladder winnings should cover just enough to get my first payments in (stupid Renji didn't know they'll take installments. What can I say, he was a scholarship boy).
The senior ladder is seven or eight fighters down to one grand champion. That's the serious money, and that's what I'll win next. Senior ladder, according to Renji, requires you to at least get to the final match on the junior ladder. That's where the real money is and with any luck that's what I'll be doing next Friday.
Hopefully I'll be able to pay my damn bills and have a little left over.
Can't believe I'm playing gladiator. Especially with kids I could drop just by raising my spirit pressure. The hardest thing will be not getting caught.
Hopefully none of the shinigami will be there – just what I need, to find Captain Commander Assface hunching there, trying to be inconspicuous in sunglasses and a bad fedora like some two-bit hood. It'd be better to see the twisted up old troll-
Ah, I hate the guy, what can I say? Captain Commander Assface.
What a fucking jerk.
The crazy thing is Renji never won the senior ladder; he only got as high as third place. And this is a future Vice Captain right? And probably Captain, soon enough, but no, Renji said he never won. In fact he said both the people who beat him are dead now, casualties of early missions.
I guess there's a price to pay for being cocky, huh? If the toughest opponent you've ever faced isn't actually trying to kill you the first opponent who is can be a bit of a shock. Those hollows play hard ball.
Renji had told me you couldn't wear the student uniform. That's going to be a nuisance, let me tell you. Maybe I'll wear my toga, the black one I wore when I went up against Byakuya. That's a good look for me.
Nah. It's a little too prominent in a certain high quality publication.
The crazy part is I have to cross reference my copy of The Substitute just to see what I've been drawn wearing. The Bankai coat? That's a little obvious.
What an annoying change in my fortunes. I'm just glad I found out about Tatsuki already. I'm still reeling a little from that; I don't think I've got my emotional balance back fully yet.
Shit this is a nuisance.
Anyway, I waited until nobody was around, then I flashed some distance away from Campus.
Here it is, opening night. I guess I'm sort of cheating, what with being Vizard destroyer of worlds and all. And the whole Bankai thing, a lot of people would think that was cheating. Certainly Renji, Ikkaku and the boys would. And Rukia would kill me, I mean she would kill me if she found out I'd gone Bankai on defenseless students.
Well I'm in kind of a bind, you see I can't see this thing going down without Shikais being released. So I bring out a cleaver as big as I am? Zangetsu is a lot easier to pick out of a crowd then I am (especially with my mop of longish white hair), so I can hardly whip him out, shout his name and expect no one to notice. On the flip side, if I don't at least seem to to have a shikai they might not even let me fight. And that absolutely can not happen.
Besides, this isn't going to be a fight, it's a con, a scam. Students against me?
If anyone asks I'll tell them it was performance art or something. Anything but a fight.
Zangetsu's bankai form against students. I just hope nobody catches me.
Well, I need the coin, there's no choice here.
Dammit this is hard to justify to myself. Not the money part, just using Zangetsu against people who (for all intents and purposes) aren't actually armed. I should be swinging a Bokken or something.
You know I can see it now. I'm going to get there and my first opponent will be Grimmy, who'll be in the same damn predicament I am, hiding out from a bunch of people who want to kill him. And he'll be like, "Stranger." And I'll say to him, "Stranger." It'll be just like the Old West in those American cowboy movies.
And then Grimmy will say "Ah, what the fuck. Grind, Pantera!"
And I'd be like, "Rock and Roll, Bitch! Bankai!" I hate Grimjaw and I'll whack that bastard if I find him. But you have to admit we'd look pretty stupid pussyfooting around each other trying not to get caught.
Friday night and I'm ready to fight, kicking asses to the left, kicking asses to the right.
Word!
So I took the opportunity to shunpo away from campus, took a good look to see that no one was around. Then I lit up.
Bankai, boys and girls. If you didn't know what you were looking at you could easily mistake it for a Shikai. Which is what I'm counting on. Then I took off my coat. I'm going at this one bare chested, like Ikkaku, so it should be a bit of a disguise for me.
I happened to look down. Okay, so I'm a little scarred up. Maybe a lot scarred up, but it's the best disguise I've got. Lots of guys get mauled up badly in the Rukong, and let's face it, in the story nobody ever scored a hit on me, there's no mention at all of being run through by Zaraki or Byakuya or sliced up by Renji and Ikkaku. The Substitute is supposed to be so good that he never gets marked.
Didn't quite work out that way.
I wish I could explain how good it was to be back in a proper black uniform again, even if it was only the pants. What can I say? Zangetsu rocks. I folded my coat and hid it in a tree. Then, with the old man's stoney silence and the damn hollows laughter echoing in my head I wrapped some green ribbon around the guard in a nice little bow and tied a long strip of it to Zangetsu's hilt chain. What can I say? Dance, Sode no Shirayuki?
I can't, it's been said in The Substitute.
In my mind Zangetsu was colder than Sode no Shirayukis ice, but I mollified him a bit by telling the hollow to shut the fuck up. All three of us look stupid, so I don't see what that asswipe has to laugh about.
That's the problem with Zanpakuto that reflect your own personality and damn inner hollows. I've already got enough stupid and stubborn to go around, thanks.