Deeds Gone Wrong
When defeat is inevitable, it is wisest to yield.
Quintilian

I sighed silently, leaning against a wall with a glass in my hand. I didn't even know what was in it anymore. I hadn't taken a bite of anything after the packet of Rohypnol went missing.

My phone vibrated silently in my pouch once, twice, then three times before I picked it up and checking it. One missed call from Lauren. Phase one was done. I got up from the wall and brushed past the old geezer who had apparently been talking to me, not even caring if I was being rude.

I found Edward sitting down on the stairs in a drunken stupor. To anybody else he probably passed off as sleepy, but I knew better. I crouched next to him and without any delays, kissed him full on the mouth. He didn't put up much of a resistance and soon we were kissing like mad. Mentally I thanked myself he wasn't drunk and only drugged. I couldn't stand the taste of alcohol.

After a good five minutes of solid kissing I heard the door open. I had already strategized my position such that anybody entering the house wouldn't see me, just Edward. Of course if Edward had scooted over just a few inches the whole plan would be ruined, but I had managed to keep him from moving too much. I still think he thought I was Bella.

Two gasps at the same time sounded, one at the main entrance, and another from around it. I detached myself from Edward, ignoring his feeble protests. God, he was clingy. How Bella stood to be near him was beyond me. I grimaced lightly and peered around the side table blocking me to see Bella fleeing out the door, Jacob hot on her heels. I heard a clump and turned before groaning loudly. Edward had fainted.

"Wimp," I muttered under my breath, glaring at his limp body. I glanced around before realizing nobody could help me. Everybody was either conversing enthusiastically or drinking enough to give themselves liver complications. I glowered at nothing in particular and got up, brushing my hands before grabbing hold of his wrists and dragging him up the stairs.

Emmett appeared at the top of the stairs, looking down at me in amusement. "Did somebody drug him or something?" he asked, amused, as he made his way down the stairs. Oh, Emmett, you have no idea. I simply glared at him.

"Mind helping? I am quite a bit shorter, you know," I said irritably. Emmett simply laughed boisterously and bounded down the stairs, lifting Edward over his shoulder in a fireman's lift and prancing up the stairs in one swift motion. I stared after Emmett for a second before shaking my head and going down. Emmett should have been born a ballerina. It would make a lot more sense. Come to think of it, the whole damn Cullen family should have been born ballerinas.

I swiped a hand over my forehead and grimaced. Revenge was hard work.

Jacob
Actions lie louder than words.
Carolyn Wells

"Idiot. Moron. Stupid. Fathead. Stuck-up rich boy," I muttered angrily under my breath. Keep repeating it, Jacob, maybe you'll feel better, I thought dryly.

I kicked a rock aimlessly and it skidded off into the forest, missing Bella by inches. I narrowed my eyes and watched her figure slump on the fallen log in the backyard of the Cullens, deep enough into the forest that it her position was immediately noticeable. Actually, unless someone was hunting for her she blended perfectly into the darkness. Even then they would have difficulty locating her.

"Bella?" I asked quietly. The only answer I got was a stifled sob.

I sighed. I was going to kill Edward Cullen when I got the chance. First he got mad at Bella, now he cheated on her? He was too frigging much. I huffed softly like that Big Bad Wolf. I never did like that story. I always had a mental image of three carved up slices of honeyed ham. I didn't blame the wolf for wanting to eat them.

"Bells, I have to go," I said quietly. "I'll pick you up for school tomorrow, okay? I'm pretty sure you don't want to ride with that man whore."

Bella immediately got up. "Do you...do you think you could give me a ride home?" she asked, her voice breaking. "I don't want Edward to...to see me like this."

I bit back a snarky retort and just nodded, waiting for her to get up and wobble over to me.

Edward Cullen is such a pig.

She made her way to my car. I followed behind; ready to catch her if she tripped, fell, or simply walked into a tree. She made it to my car without much problems and I got in, driving off in the direction of her house with the uneasy feeling that someone was watching me.

Edward
I love drugs, but I hate hangovers, and the hatred of the hangover wins by a landslide every time.
Margaret Cho

Someone was hitting me on the head with a hammer. Not only that, but he was hitting me hard and repeatedly.

"Ouch," I groaned, forcing my eyes open a millimetre. Something white popped in front of my eyes, and I moaned loudly before slamming my eyelids shut again. Somehow that movement hurt too.

"Edward, Edward, Edward," Emmett said in mock amusement. I squinted to see him perched on a rattan seat near my door. His features were blurred-I could only make out the silhouette. "Hasn't Carlisle taught you better than to drink? You're not even legal yet. Now, on the other hand, underage drinking sounds like something I would do."

I groaned softly as my head throbbed. "Kill me now," I begged.

"No can do," Emmett said cheerfully. "The Man gave me strict orders that murder is out of bounds, requested or not."

"How can you be so damn happy?" I demanded.

"Easy. I'm not the one drunk and with a hellish hangover."

I decided to ignore Emmett. It was safer for my head. "I'm not drunk."

Even with my eyes closed I could feel Emmett's incredulity. "Edward, you're in bed at noon on a school day. You have a massive headache, and you haven't moved for the past twelve hours. That sounds pretty drunk to me."

"I didn't drink," I repeated stubbornly. I knew I hadn't drunk anything alcoholic. "I mean, sure, I envy alcoholics, but I'm not so stupid as to drink, Emmett. If I did drink Carlisle would probably save my livers a job and kill me himself."

"You envy alcoholics?" Trust Emmett to pick up on that one.

"Sure. They have something to blame every time," I explained. "Pass me something cold and wet." I felt something heavy and cold land on my face with a painful slap and I picked it up with a grunt. I decided not to ask Emmett what it was.

Emmett paused. "Electricity is made of electrons. Can you see them?" he asked. I twitched open one eye.

"Emmett, nobody can see electrons."

Emmett flung a torch at me. It landed on my stomach. I stared at it, then at Emmett. "So?"

He grinned. "You're not drunk," he said happily. I rolled my eyes behind my eyelids. Trust Emmett to determine it like that.

"Emmett, people usually use breathalysers."

He shrugged. "Oh, well. This is Emmett style."

I sighed. "Okay, Emmett. Fine. Why aren't you in school?"

"Carlisle wanted me to stay with you in case something happened and Esme was called out. After all, I am the biggest and baddest. Oh, and Edward, Carlisle's furious. Either you got drunk or you were drugged. Either way you're in deep poop later."

I groaned loudly. It seemed to bring me satisfaction, considering it was the only thing that didn't make me feel like puking my guts out. "Thanks, Emmett. Thanks a lot."

I heard Emmett shift in his seat, grinning madly. "Sure, no problemo." Jeesh, did the guy not get sarcasm?

"Emmett, get the door!" Esme shrieked from below. Emmett huffed a huge sigh and clumped off. I sighed. Oh, for some peace and quiet. In the Cullen household? Who was I kidding?

I heard Emmett speak downstairs, and a response I didn't hear. God, these walls were thin.

"Edwardo!" Emmett screeched, sticking his head through the door. I stared lazily at him, feeling too tired to do anything. The headache had decreased a little, but I felt lethargic. "Jane's here."

I blinked, turning to look at the digital clock blinking faithfully. Oh. School had let out already. Had I really slept that long?

I noticed Emmett waiting for a response. Sighing, I rolled my eyes. "So? Let her in!" I said, slightly incredulous with the level of Emmett's weirdness. Was idiocy hereditary?

Emmett did the finger-point complete with sound effects and left. Minutes later I heard Jane's soft form enter the room, accompanied by a cloying scent of roses and lilac, and something earthy. It was nice, but I preferred Bella's light freesia scent. It was so much more to my taste. I shut my eyes, basking in the comfort it brought me.

I sighed-noticing suddenly I seemed to be doing that more often lately. I reopened my eyes, wincing at the bright light. Jane was hovering above me, smirking slightly.

"What?" I asked, self-conscious and irritated by that smug little smile on her face. She shrugged and I glowered at her. "Jane, I have a massive headache and completely no memory of what happened last night, so would you please say what it is you wanted to say and get out?" I guess I wasn't being very polite, but even I had a limit on my patience.

Jane shrugged again, and pulled out a large envelope before tossing it onto my bed, where it bounced awkwardly and landed on my chest. "Just thought you might want to know," she said before turning and walking off, her hair bouncing with each step she took. I watched her before turning my attention to the envelope.

Ripping it open, a bundle of photos fell out, glossy and slightly sticky from the freshly printed photos. I gingerly touched one, grimacing when the fresh ink came away on my finger. Gently I shunted them aside, freezing when I saw the first photo on top.

"No way," I whispered, shuffling through the photos, my movement becoming more urgent with each of the seemingly endless photos that passed.

Jacob and Bella hugging. Jacob and Bella with Bella's face buried in his sweater. Jacob's smug, bloody, bloody smug face smirking at Bella.

I picked up the photos and threw them across the room, yelling loudly into my pillow to muffle the scream.

Jealousward is adorable. Anyway, sorry for the long pause, guys, because I had little scare with a high fever, flu and sore throat, and everyone knows what THAT is. Thank God it stopped after two days and turned out not to be H1N1. The next update should be in five days or so, since I'm having major writer's block. I think I'm going to Starbucks to write this time. I'm sick of writing like a crazy writer in my house. Anyway, as always reviews are loved!