Hey guys! Hope you all have a fantastic Christmas and Happy new year :):) Here is part 2 in the bomb installment. 2x17

Chapter 15 – I'm More Lonely Then Before

Meredith felt tears swell in her eyes as Cristina left the room for safety. She turned to Dylan.

"So you have a plan, right?" She nodded to her self, sniffing slightly, "You have a way to get me out of this, right?"

Dylan looked at her and she understood.

* * *

"Calm down." Said Addison,

"Calm down?" Richard said, upset, "I have an evacuated O.R, a bomb in a body cavy, a missing paramedic, an intern with her hand on the explosive! Two world class surgeons in harm's way!"

"What?" Addie stopped him, "Missing paramedic?"

"Damn girl ran off."

"But-"

"An intern put her hand there instead. An intern!"

Addison starred at him, "Which intern?"

"What?"

"Which intern Richard?"

"Meredith Grey."

"Meredith…" Addison gaped,

"I can't worry about that, I have a man on a table who may bleed out at any moment unless we move the bomb from his chest! And my favourite resident in labour who you're now telling me refuses to push! Really! Calm down? You really want to say to me 'calm down'?"

* * *

In the OR Meredith watched as Dylan rubbed a hand over his face.

"I have to see the Chief of Surgery." He said, "When I come back we'll start."

"Wait."

He turned.

"Can you… could you get me my cell phone? I need… I have… I need to say…"

"We need to do this as quickly as possible." Dylan told her, "I'm sorry."

Meredith swallowed, "Can I have any phone?"

Dylan looked at her and pulled his own cell from his back pocket and passed it to her spare hand, and left.

Meredith looked down at it and dialled the first number.

Addison was sitting with her head in her hands. She wanted nothing more then to wake up and have this whole stupid day be a dream. To wake in Meredith's bed, wrapped in each other's arms. To kiss her girlfriend and get up early, so George and Izzie wouldn't suspect them.

Her cell rang, and Addie pulled it absently from her pocket. A number flashed on the screen. Nothing about it was familiar. And to be completely honest Addison couldn't face talking to anyone right now. She ignored the call.

Meredith sniffed as voice mail activated.

'You've reached the cell phone of Doctor Addison Forbes Montgomery, please leave a message. In the case of an emergency; please page me.' The pre recorded message of Addison's voice, calmed Meredith, even if it was only telling her additional contact information.

The phone beeped and Meredith spoke, her voice full of tears.

"Had to get voice mail didn't I." She gave an odd laugh, "I don't know what to say. I have everything sorted out. All my affairs. Except… Except for my mother." Meredith sniffed, "Oh God." She looked down at her hand, "I'm so sorry I did this, but… I'm to blame. Don't blame yourself. This isn't your fault… I… I love you. I'm in love with you." She sniffed again, "I guess this is my good bye then. Just, please, promise you won't forget me." She hung up and looked at Burke, who was giving her as much privacy as he could; his back was to her as he pumped the ambu bag slowly.

The next call was to her own home, so she expected the voice mail –or answering machine rather- this time.

"Iz, George. It's uh… It's me." She swallowed, "I'm sorry for this but… I'm sorry. Cristina, please don't blame yourself, or others. This was me and you know it. This was my incredibly stupid fault. Alex. Look I know we aren't close but listen, fight for the person you love. Ok? Fight for her. And Izzie… Let him." She sighed, "George… I'm sorry. About Doc and everything. You're like my brother and I love you. I love you all I guess." Her voice trailed off, "Look after Izzie will you George? This is going to break her." She took a breath, "Addison. My Addison… Why didn't you pick up? God… Take care of my Mindy. With Nate and Chris. And please Addie, tell Derek… Tell him I forgave him."

Meredith looked at Burke. And held the phone out.

"Tell Cristina something... and if we get through this… I swear I'll delete it straight away."

He nodded and took the phone. "Cristina." He sighed, "I can't be the other guy, I'm sorry. I love you."

He passed the phone back and Meredith hung up.

The next call hurt the most. "Hello, Nate speaking."

"Nate."

"Meredith?"

"I need to speak with Mindy." Meredith said, her voice wavering,

"Are you ok?"

"Please Nate, Mindy?"

"Ok." There was a pause before the familiar voice of her daughter answered, "Mummy?"

Meredith smiled through her tears and forced her voice to sound cheerful, "Hey sweetie."

"Can I stop calling Aunty Addison, Aunty Addison?" Asked Mindy excited,

"Not just yet baby; soon."

"Ok."

"Mindy I can't talk long, I'm at work." Meredith told her,

"Oh." Mindy sounded upset.

"I just wanted to tell you that you're daddies need to give you lots of cuddles from me, ok?"

"Why can't you?" Meredith felt that on some level Mindy knew there was something wrong.

"I might not be able too, sweetie, I have to work a lot now. I won't be able to see you." Dylan walked into the room and Meredith swallowed heavily, "Mindy, baby, I have to go now."

"Ok Mummy."

"By sweetie. Mummy loves you, ok?"

"I love you Mummy."

Meredith nodded; tears were spilling down her face. "Bye."

"Bye Mummy. Mwa!" She kissed,

"I love you. Remember that. Mummy loves you."

"Ok Mummy."

Mindy hung up the phone and Meredith closed it, looking defeated as she wiped her eyes.

Dylan beckoned Burke over and Meredith took over the ambu bag still crying slightly. The two men were standing in the doorway whispering and every now and then they would turn to look at her.

"Stop it." Meredith was surprised at how steady her voice was, "I'm not a patient."

"What?" Asked Dylan,

"The two of you are looking at me the way we look at patients." Meredith told them, "Like I'm going to freak out at any minute. I'm not freaking out. I just had to say goodbye to my daughter without her knowing. You'd be crying too, ok. I'm not freaking out, and I'm not gonna freak out, so whatever it is just tell me straight out."

Burke walked to her, "The main oxygen line runs directly under this room."

"Ok." Meredith said slowly, "Not ok. ... Well? I need one of you to tell me what this means exactly. Because I think I know what it means. But I tend to be glass half-empty right now so I won't trust what I think it means." She said to them, "Because what I think it means if the bomb were to explode over the oxygen line the whole hospital could blow up. ... And that's just crazy, right?"

* * *

Addison felt her phone vibrate and pulled it out. She had a new voicemail.

"Dr. Montgomery." George had found her where she sat in a corridor, "What are we gonna do? I mean about Dr. Bailey. Can, can we drug her?"

"Against her will?" Addie said in monotone,

"No. Well ... yes." Addison looked up at him. She didn't need this. "Can't we force her to push? If uh- Declare her temporarily insane?"

Addison let out an angry sigh, "You want me to declare Miranda Bailey. Miranda. Bailey. Incompetent?" She asked, "Do you think that will help? Do you think that will make her more inclined, more comfortable giving birth?"

"I don't know that's why-"

"Do you think I'm not doing everything I can to help her?" Addie asked, interrupting him, "I mean do you think I'm just out here because, I don't know feel a little lazy, just need a little me time?"

"I'm just asking." Defended George,

"Stop asking!" Yelled Addison, "Because no matter what you ask the answer is I don't know. I'm doing everything thing I can! Everything I can! Miranda Bailey's husband is in mortal danger. Actual mortal danger! And there's not a lot I can say to comfort her right now because there's not a lot that anybody can say to comfort me. I'm doing my best. Dr. Bailey is doing her best. And I need you to do your best! And I need it to better than standing here asking me the world's most stupidest question! I don't know O'Malley!"

* * *

Burke had extended the wound and Meredith was supposed to be removing the explosive slowly and levelly. Except she wasn't.

"Grey. His pressure's dropping. …Grey."

"I can't! No. I can't. This is crazy." She turned to Burke, "Burke, you gonna go, you go. Both of you should go."

"Nobody's dying today, Grey."

"Meredith I want you to look at me. Look at me." Meredith turned and looked at Dylan, "I know this is bad. And I know that I'm this ass who's been yelling at you all day. So you pretend that I'm not. You pretend that I'm someone you like. Whatever you need. But you need to listen to me."

Meredith looked at him and wished; the scene changed. There was no bomb. No patient. Just her heart beat and her breathing. The room was bright and a tear fell down her face.

"I'm scared."

Addison looked over at her, "I know." She gave her a soft smile, "You can do this. It'll be over in a second. ... You can do this Meredith."

"Ok."

"Ok."

The reality flooded back, and Meredith started to remove the explosive. And slowly. Smoothly. She moved it forward and placed it in Dylan's hands.

"You did good." He whispered. And he started to walk slowly away, out of the OR. Meredith looked after him curiously. Then went out to see where he was going. Once she left the OR she felt everything shift. Her eyes shut tight and her breath caught. Her skin warmed and her whole body was thrown back, crashing to the floor. Windows were broken, walls were cracked and paper's fell to the ground gracefully burning away.

The bomb had gone off and Dylan was dead.

* * *

Meredith refused to go with Cristina; refused to let them do anything more then removed her scrub cap and gown.

Meanwhile Derek and Burke were standing with everyone else. Mrs Carlson had just left burke to go and thank Hannah for saving her husbands life.

Addison rushed forward, "Where is she?" She asked, "Burke, where is she?"

Just then the elevator opened, and Meredith, still covered in soot and blood walked out.

"Oh God." Addie whimpered and Meredith looked at her, and walked quickly forward and the two women embraced, tears falling down their faces.

Addison held Meredith to her, her face buried in the crook of Meredith's neck, ignoring the smell of blood. Meredith's eye's closed and she rested against Addie, who held her closer and kissed just above the neckline of Meredith's scrubs, her head still placed on Meredith's shoulder.

"I was so scared."

Meredith's lips found Addie's ear and she whispered two words that meant nothing compared to what she felt. "I'm sorry."

"Never leave me like that again." Addison begged quietly,

"I won't."

"Promise me."

"I promise." Meredith whispered back, she could feel eyes on her, people around them, watching. Izzie, Cristina and George. Alex, Derek and Burke. Richard and his wife.

She didn't open her eyes to look at them; instead she just squeezed her girlfriend gently and murmured so quietly Addison had to strain to hear her clearly.

"I love you."

Addison nodded into Meredith neck, "I love you too." She whimpered.

She straightened up, and wiped her eyes, then turned to Izzie and Cristina. The three of them took Meredith to the showers. They washed away the blood and cleaned her wounds. Izzie left to retrieve Meredith's clothes. Cristina pulled up her scrub top and Addison bent down, removing her shoes and pants so Meredith stood in only her bra and underwear. Izzie came back holding the clothes. The three made to leave, so Meredith could get changed, but Mere reached out and grabbed Addie's wrist holding her back.

When they were alone Meredith lent forward and kissed Addison softly and Addie let out a small moan.

Meredith dressed and Addison shut off the shower. But the two of them stayed in there alone for a moment holding each other once more, kissing gently.

* * *

They all went to Meredith's house. Cristina, Alex, Izzie and George. Mere and Addison walked up the stairs to Meredith's bedroom.

"I'm fine Addison." Meredith whispered to her, "Go down stairs."

Addie nodded reluctantly, knowing Mere needed to be by herself for the moment. She kissed her softly, and murmured her love then made her way down stairs, where the others sat in the living room, that morning's paper between them.

It felt so long ago she was worrying about that. That they had the nerve to do that. She was sure it was illegal, and she would be complaining, her parents would most likely sue, their way of showing support for her.

She walked out and closed the paper, the other's looked at her and she sighed,

"Say it."

"No we're sorry-" Izzie started,

"No. It's fine Izzie."

Alex cleared his throat, "A while ago we had this case." He let out a breathe, "Meredith had this case. She was freaked out. Because the girl… the girl was a rape victim and she..." He paused, "She had the same shoes."

Addison nodded, "She told me."

"I- I made fun of her." Alex said, "Because she had to carry- …I made fun of her."

"You didn't know."

"Was it her?" Cristina cut in, "The paper said one of the victims fell pregnant. Was it her?"

"Yes." Murmured Addison,

They were all silent until George stood to refill their drinks; he noticed the answering machine on the desk against the wall flashing.

"We have a message." He said softly, and he pressed play,

Meredith's teared voice filled the room. When the message finished they all sat stunned. Addison had tears in her eyes and she pulled out her cell phone pressing it to her ear as she listened to the voicemail from the call she'd ignored earlier.

She left the room as the tears poured down her face. She sat on the bottom of the stairs and sobbed softly.

"Addison?" She jumped and looked up. Derek was standing awkwardly outside the door. He let him self in and walked to her, "Addison are you alright?"

She shook her head, and wiped her tears, "She almost died today." She whimpered, Derek put his arm around her shoulders,

"But she didn't."

Addie nodded, sniffing slightly, "I'm in love with her Derek." She sat up and looked him in the eye, "I'm not saying this to hurt you. Because it's true, I'm in love with her. I always have been."

Derek nodded, "I could tell. When you were embracing I could tell."

Addison was looking down at her fingers, "She called me today. When she had her hand on the… she called me and I ignored it."

"She's alive Addison. She's alive and well and probably hurting incredibly. If you're anything to go by, one of her biggest secrets was shouted to the whole of Seattle, probably a greater part of America, and she saw a man blow up. Go to her."

Addison nodded and wiped her eyes, "You're in love with her." She told him softly,

Derek gave her a small smile, "Yeah… I'm in love with her."

"Do you want to…?" Addie indicated the stairs,

"No." He told her quietly, "She doesn't need to know I was here."

TBC

review! :) So like i said, Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays. Have a great time what ever you're doing.

(And there will be more of my original plot lines coming in soon, i swear)