Hey guys, sorry for the slow update but i got stuck with this chap and wrote the four chapters after it... i tend to do that sometimes.
This chapter is a little different from the others, the start and end are in first person (not Meredith) and the middle is flashbacks....
Chapter 19 – Love Sacrifice
I saw her sitting at the bar as soon as I walked in. My eyes scanned her form. Tight jeans, fitted long-sleave shirt, slightly messy. Dirty blonde in colour, and loose.
I walked forward and sat on the stool next to her, removing my jacket and placing it on the bar in front of me. I flashed the friendly looking bartender a smile and ordered a beer.
She glanced over at me with dusty blue eyes. I smiled slightly and she gave and awkward, mildly wincing smile back.
"Is this a good bar?" I asked her, "I haven't been here before."
She looked at me, "Have you just moved here?"
"Oh no, I've been in Seattle for a few years now," I clarified, "Just never here."
She nodded, "Well it's nice here I suppose, but almost everyone one works across the road at the hospital."
I smiled, "Do you?"
"Yea, I'm a surgical intern."
I nodded, "I'm a surgeon at Mercy West. Chief Resident."
A man walked over at her other side, placing his hand on her lower back, "No tequila?" he asked a smirk on his face,
"Not sleeping with you Mark," she smiled, "Not tonight."
He pouted at her and she slapped him lightly on the chest with the back of her hand.
"Why are you here? Shouldn't you be getting drunk with your friends complaining about Addie?"
"Leave Mark." He left and she turned to me, "Sorry about that."
"It's fine." I said, "Is that your boyfriend?"
She smiled and shook her head, "He's my friend." She said, "Sex friend."
The door behind us opened and we both turned our heads slightly at the ring of the bell. A tall woman walked in with a huge smile on her face that made her whole body glow. She was gorgeous, but as soon as she saw the woman next to me, her smile fell.
"She doesn't look happy to see you."
"That's Addison." She sighed, brushing her hair from her face, "She and I broke up, well. She broke up with me."
"I just had a break up too." I nodded understandingly,
"Sucks." She took a long drink from her beer,
"Yeah it does."
"Well, Addison's pissed off because she caught me with Sex-Friend, this is afterwards."
I nodded and sipped my own beer; I couldn't help but look this woman over again. She tilted her head and smiled as my eyes rose back to hers.
"Do you wanna get out of here?" she asked,
* * *
It was nearing ten o'clock, Meredith and Mark lounged on the couch watching the end of a movie.
"So I'm heading back to New York tomorrow." Mark said as it finished and the credits started to roll,
Meredith looked up, frowning, "What?"
"I'm an intern, I can't just up and leave; you know that."
She nodded, "Well what am I going to do about…" She paused, "I shouldn't want it, should I?"
Mark paused, "What, sex?"
"Yea." Meredith readjusted her position, "I mean I was raped. My one chance to loose my virginity was literally stolen, yet I'm crazy about sex."
"Well, in normal, well… I suppose the majority of rape victims…"
"Like Addie. She's sworn of sex, and men. You should've seen her the other day in the coffee shop, some guy hit on her. She almost started crying."
"Meredith all your hormones are… You're pregnant; it's natural for you to feel this."
Meredith sighed and ran a hand over her stomach.
"My mother wants me to keep her." She said, "She wants me to move to Boston, she says she'll stop work. She wants to help me."
"Isn't that good?"
Meredith sighed, "I guess. But… I don't think she's doing it for the baby. Or me for that matter. I think she's doing it so she fells less guilty. You know, about always being at the hospital, and letting me live here by myself. She probably thinks if she does this then the rape gets cancelled away."
"She's your mother Meredith."
Mere nodded, but suddenly burst into tears.
"I can't do it." She cried, "I can't be a mum, I'm only eighteen!"
"Hey." Mark took her in his arms and rubbed circles on her back, "It'll be okay."
"No it won't Mark! I'm too young, I'll turn out just like her, and my kid will hate me! And I won't even be able to look at her!" She was sobbing into his shoulder and Mark listened carefully, knowing Addison would need to know about this, "I can't bring his baby here; I can't raise a child Mark."
"There are options Meredith." He whispered,
Meredith looked up, "It's a bit late for that, Mark. And… I couldn't do it. I wanted to, I was going to, Addie had everything ready but I couldn't do it."
Mark realised his mistake and quickly cut over her, "No I mean adoption."
"Oh."
"You could put her up for adoption, I'm sure there's a couple out there that can't have the little girl they want so much."
"Mark?"
"Yea?"
"Could you stay here tonight? I don't want to be alone." Her voice was small and it broke Mark's heart.
He hadn't known this girl for very long, having requested a temporary transfer to Mercy West's programme after expressing the special circumstances to his higher ups, but right now as he watched this broken pregnant girl whimper he couldn't imagine anyone wanting to hurt her in the way she had been.
He kissed the top of her head, "I'll stay, and I'll call Addison, you too can have a talk or just I don't know, She can stay with you here, I don't think she likes being alone much either."
"I'm gonna miss you Mark."
"I know, I'll miss you too."
* * *
Meredith smiled softly. She could easily get used to this; waking in the mid morning next to Addison, wrapped in each others arms. Except she knew she wouldn't because she was in med school and Addie was in the middle of residency in Seattle.
Addie woke then with a smile, she lent forward and brushed her lips over Meredith's.
"Morning." Meredith smiled,
"Good morning." Addison kissed her again, "What are you doing today?"
"Nothing. I have no classes and no lectures."
"Excellent." Grinned Addie. They started to kiss again; Meredith rolled them over so she was on top of Addie.
"Wait, stop." Addie said suddenly,
"What is it?"
"Nothing's wrong, there's just." Addie swallowed, "There's something I have to tell you, and I'm not sure how you will react."
Meredith frowned slightly, "Ok…"
"I'm going to tell you something and I really hope you don't freak our or reject it. Actually I was kinda hoping you would say something… similar to me."
"Ok. Go ahead." Meredith told her confused but interested,
"Meredith I think… I think that- no, I know that… I'm falling in love with you." She smiled in relief having said it, "I'm falling in love with you."
There was a silence and Addison became worried. She gave a small squirm, Meredith still on top of her.
"Mere? Are you going to say anything?" She asked hesitantly,
Meredith kissed her, and it was a kiss full of passion and emotion. When she pulled back they were both smiling and panting.
"I'm falling in love with you too." Grinned Meredith, "I love you."
Addie's smile stretched wider and she kissed her softly and quickly,
"I love you Meredith Grey."
"I love you Addison Montgomery."
* * *
She wasn't quite sure when it had happened, or how exactly. But it had and she was pleased, happy. They had just been friends at first. Just two friends on a vacation. But along the way somewhere, they stopped sleeping through the men of Europe and starting sleeping with each other.
Death and Die, the quirkiest couple to ever roam the Earth.
That was until Amsterdam.
Meredith had walked into their cheap motel room to find Sadie naked and in bed with some random guy who she doubted spoke English. That was the end of Death and Die, of the real Death and Die.
Sadie had looked up and asked Meredith for privacy, but Meredith just stared.
"You're sleeping with someone else?"
Sadie groaned and realised Meredith wasn't going to leave. Sadie got up and shrugged on a Tee, the guy went into the bathroom.
"You didn't thin we were exclusive di you?" Scoffed Sadie,
"I've been."
At that Sadie laughed, "You?! Exclusive? Death you're a bigger whore then the prostitute on the next block."
"I may sleep around Sadie, but that doesn't mean I cheat on people!"
"Cheat? Death it's not like we're dating! We're just having some fun, experimenting. A nice little lesbian experience."
Meredith glared, "Just having fun?" she asked,
"Yea, I mean," Sadie looked at Mere, "We're twenty-five, and this is Europe."
Meredith swallowed, "I don't think we should continue this."
"This? Death there is no 'this' between us."
"Not any more there isn't." Meredith turned and left,
"Death!" Sadie called after her, "Where're you going? Death!"
Sadie jumped up and pulled on a pair of jeans then rushed out of the room, "Death wait."
"Why should I?!" exclaimed Meredith, "it's not like you have any common decency. I don't need or want to spend any more time then I have to with a bitch like you!"
"Death…"
"Don't call me that."
"Meredith," Sadie tried, Meredith stormed off, "Meredith listen-"
"No! Ok? Just do me a favour, Die, and go to hell!"
"Death I didn't mean to hurt you."
"Oh that makes me feel so much better, thanks Sadie."
"Meredith…"
"FUCK OFF SADIE!"
Sadie swallowed and nodded, "Ok, I'll just uh, I'll be here, if you need me."
Meredith didn't respond, she just walked away trying to stop the tears forming in her eyes.
* * *
I woke to the sound of my blaring alarm and repressed a groan. My eyes opened slowly and I smiled at the sight before me. My better half for the night was frowning at the alarm, her face screwed up cutely.
"Hey, sorry about the alarm, I have to get into work." I whispered, "You can go back to sleep if you want, I'll leave a towel out for you."
She rubbed her eyes, "What time is it?"
"Five am." I sat up in bed, the covers falling down my body revealing my naked chest.
"Ergh." She groaned and yawned, "I have to go to work to. I have pre-rounds."
"Well in that case you can have first shower. I'll make some coffee."
We both got up, I gave her a towel and led her through to my shower, then I dressed in boxers and a t-shirt. I moved to the kitchen and started to make my breakfast and coffee.
When she entered the room again, her hair dripping wet and dressed in the clothes from yesterday I had already finished.
"Do you want some coffee?" I offered,
She shook her head, "No, I'm uh- I'm just gonna go…" She looked at me awkwardly, "So uh, goodbye…"
I smirked. She didn't know my name, and I didn't know heres.
"Arizona." I introduced myself, holding out my hand, "Arizona Robbins."
She shook my hand briefly, "Meredith Grey."
She turned to leave and, with a smile, I called after her, "We should do this again some time."
I heard her stop in her tracks and I walked after her, "Casual sex I mean."
Meredith relaxed and turned to me, "I'm already doing that with someone."
"That guy from the bar?"
"Yeah."
"I don't mind. It's just sex." I grinned,
Meredith looked at me curiously in the eye, "Ok then," she bit her lip awkwardly, still looking at me, "Yeah."
We exchanged phone numbers and Meredith gave me that odd grin she'd given me last night.
"Bye."
"I'll see you later, Meredith Grey."
She smirked at me, "Yes you will."
Please reveiw :):) i'll try update soon