The Cullens are at it Again!

Chapter 2: Part 5: Biology

A/N:

So here's the long and the short of it. I know it's been forever for this chapter and I truly apologize for that. But here is the situation: you all know what I have going on, or rather you know what I have told you so far. Well instead of whining about everything I have to get accomplish in RL, here's what I have to say.

And I am going to be brutally honest with you all. I love each and every one of your comments/reviews. Truthfully, that is the only reason I am still writing this story. That and also I have real issues with not finishing the things I start.

Also I know I was planning to play the who's pov game with you guys, but with everything going on. It's going to be more of a hassle than a fun thing, and that's not your fault, it's just me trying to remember what I have sent out and what not and when and to whom and yada yada. But I will still send out a teaser for everyone who reviews, there just won't be an extra. I really hope that all makes sense guys.

But I do want to let you know, I will be very slow going for a while. I really do have a lot going on and even more since my last post. I swear things keep getting piled on. Although some I wouldn't give up for the world.

So with all that being said I want to personally thank each and every one of my faithful reviewers and the few who have just recently started reading this story. You guys really are the reason behind this story.

Dani, girl I wouldn't make it without you. You are the bestest friend a girl could ever ask for. I don't know what I'd do without you. I know you don't think anything of it, but you are there every time I need you. And that means a lot to me.

And Jenny baby, well besides you being the nuts on my brownie, you know I couldn't make it through the day without you. No matter what kind of day I'm having, you make it all better.

I love my girls! They are the most wonderful biatches in the world.

Jake POV

As much as I understood the whole having to blend in thing, I hated it. Yes, going back to high school is probably the easiest way, especially since Nessie insisted on staying with Bella and Edward. I loved Bella, but living with her and all the rest of the vamps was not my idea of a happily ever after—although in the last few years I think we have all come to a different opinion of each other.

Bella was still my best friend, and being that I was married to his daughter, Edward and I had definitely warmed up to each other. But damn, the smell was too much. How people ever thought vampires smelled good was beyond me. They were the single most disgusting creatures I had ever encountered—too sweet, too strong.

Emmett and I got along the best; but that was probably because we all played tricks on each other, and most of the time we ganged up against the girls. No one was safe while the both of us were conspiring. Edward and Jasper helped out on occasion, but were typically otherwise occupied with different matters.

Jasper was always into history and was constantly reading books and fixing the mistakes, and then he would send them in to the publisher anonymously. When he wasn't doing that, he was creating elaborate mind games and trying to talk us into playing them. Edward would have been the best choice, even with the mind reading ability, but he was usually scoping out the latest of vehicles and various other activities. How that boy (and yes, he can be considered a boy now that I'm older than him) could play the piano and read so consistently was unnerving, and to say the least bor-ing.

"Dude, what's with you?" Emmett pulled me from my thoughts.

"Nothin', just thinkin', you know," I answered but only half heartedly.

"Pull it together. We have another teacher to fuck with."

"I'm good, any plans?"

"Nah, you got any?"

I couldn't concentrate. My mind kept going back to Ness and me. I was ready for us to move on, to spread our wings, to live as a real married couple, do things that real married couples do, like start a family, move out on your own, get a house, maybe a dog. But no, she still wanted to complete high school a million more times before she was ready to grow up.

There was no doubt in my mind that I loved her, and I would do anything for her, but I was tired of living this way. I was tired of playing a seventeen year-old, when in reality I should be a forty year-old. I cringed at that thought. I wasn't ready to be that old. But I was ready to get a job, to go to college, to start a career. The Cullens made it impossible with their constant supply of money that they took joy in throwing in our faces.

I contributed this to be the reason why Renesmee wasn't ready to leave the nest yet. Bella and Edward spoiling her beyond imagination was no help either. They were beginning to treat her more like an adult, but she was definitely still their little girl, still always the daddy's girl. I appreciated it, but was sickened by it at the same time. Alice and her shopping trips, Rose and her gushing—none of it helped. Then there were the proud grandparents who continued to treat her as a young grandchild. She got whatever she wanted from everyone and was never taught to work for it. Not only did it frustrate me, but it unnerved me. I was ready to live as the grown up, but I was married to a child still.

God, what's with me? Why can't I quit thinking about all of this? These were all nonessentials that didn't normally bother me, but today was obviously a different story. Today everything was bothering me. The way Edward kissed her forehead when he went to say good morning, the way Bella walked into school with her arm wrapped around her waist, the way Rosalie brushed her hair, and the way Emmett was the one who told the asshole that was hitting on her to back off. Each and every one of them was pissing me the fuck off, and I couldn't help but get angry.

"Dude, Jake?" Emmett asked, raising an eyebrow

"Huh?"

"Snap out of it already."

"Yeah, I'm good." He looked at me questionably.

"You sure, cause you look like you are having second thoughts."

"No, really I was thinking about some other things. I promise I'm fine. What's the plan?" I asked him.

Emm then proceeded to brief me on what ideas he had for this class, while I sparked a few of my own, and we decided that they would all be good—or at least passable. Nothing was extraordinary or totally original, but hey, we still had all year to grow, why show the big guns the second day?

A lady came in the door just then and began to write on the board. When she was finished, she asked that each of us stand and introduce ourselves to the class. Same shit, different class, each introduction was growing tedious and asinine. I answered with my name and a brief description of myself, just enough to get the point across that I liked to hunt and have fun. God, if have to endure another one of these sessions I may just have to sew up my ears.

When it was Emmett's turn, he stood and in a gangsta rapper voice answered, "Yo! Pimp master Emmett in the hiz-ouse. I enjoy a good time, and ladies you know what I mean. Sorry, taken already. I love to hunt, go camping, and bust some moves." After he finished his long winded sentence, he then turned and gestured toward the empty chair next to him, "And this is my best friend, but he doesn't talk to strangers, he will only talk to me. But his name is Kellan, and he moved here with us.

"He's a rockin' DJ, so ya'll should come and check him out. I hear there's this awesome party comin' up, and he'll be spinning some discs! So bring your moves and your great attitudes."

I swear half of the class was looking at Emmett like he was insane.

Shit, this wasn't in our little discussion! I took my hand and shielded my face trying to hide myself from Emmett's crazy antics. I couldn't believe what he was doing. I mean, yeah, pranks were one thing, but pretending you are insane is something totally different—that shit carried with you your entire high school career. Not that we should care; this was simply a stop on the proverbial road of life.

As Emmett went on having a discussion with his 'friend,' the class continued their laughter and pointing at Emmett, trying to decide whether or not he was truly crazy.

The teacher then called the class to order and began introducing herself as she passed out our syllabus.

"Excuse me, we need one more, Ms. Craft," Emmett said without waiting for her to acknowledge his raised hand.

"I'm sorry. I thought I gave your table four."

"Well you did, but there are five of us." At this point, our table was doing our best to suppress our laughter, but the tables around us were not doing so well.

"Ummm…There are only four of you."

"No there are five of us. One, two, three, four, five," he stated while pointing at each of us, including the empty chair.

"Emmett, I think you counted yourself twice. There are only four of you."

"I didn't count myself twice. I think I know how to count. I mean, I am in eleventh grade; you can't get that far without learning your numbers. I mean, when I was in kindergarten, yeah, sure I didn't know, but now that I'm older, I totally taught myself. There are five of us sitting here—Rose, Jake, Kellan, Jazz, and myself. That is five. Are you blind, or do you not know how to count?" he asked her. And nearly the entire class was giggling at his outburst.

"Ohhh, I'm sorry, here is another one." Ms. Craft's eyes squinted at Emmett before she shook her head and handed him another paper. "Emmett, do your parents know about your special friend?"

"Yup, and they know that he spends the night too!" Emmett answered rather proudly. Rose busted up laughing at that, her lips trying to hold back the air so it caused a spitting noise. "Mom and dad won't let us have bunk beds though, so he has to sleep with me!"

"Where is Rose supposed to sleep then?" I asked loudly. Rose stopped laughing and glared.

"She sleeps on the floor; she says the bed gets too crowded."

"Emmett there is no way in hell I would ever sleep on your nasty ass floor."

"But Rosie…."

"Can it sucker," Rose threatened.

Emmett stopped there and started looking over his class materials… or at least pretending to. I knew he was trying to scheme up his next attack.

Once everything had settled down, she began to go over the syllabus with us. When she reached the grading scale, I raised my hand.

"Yes, Jacob?"

"I don't get it."

"Well it's not that hard. It just looks really complicated, but really if you just come to class, participate, and do your work, you will do fine in here."

"But I still don't get it," I complained once more, trying my best not to show the humor behind her misunderstanding—which I had anticipated.

"What is it that you don't get exactly? Maybe I can better explain it and ease your worries."

"How do they make a really big tree into this really thin piece of paper?" Immediately, half of the class was covering their mouths and doing what they could to keep from making a big display of their laughter. Even Rose couldn't wipe the smirk on her face.

Damn, I even caught the Barbie! I thought proudly to myself. Bet she'd never heard that one before.

Ms. Craft continued talking about some moronic science experiment that I couldn't give two shits about right now. But she was attempting, without avail to ignore Emmett and me and keep some semblance to class.

"Now does anyone know what will happen when you put the Mentos into the soda?"

Most of the students wore dumbfounded looks upon their faces….seriously do they not realize that it will explode? I don't know how many times we mixed these together to create explosions—even before I found out that I was 'immortal.'

"I do, Ms. Craft," Emmett stated, raising his hand.

"Please tell the class what they should expect when they drop the candy, Emmett."

"Simple, it will explode."

"And do you know why?"

"I do."

"Can you please explain?"

"Ohhh, I'm sorry, I can't divulge that information. That's highly complicated, and I'm not allowed to talk about it."

"It is a little complicated, but I don't understand why you can't talk about it."

"I have intel that I'm not allowed to share with civilians. The sources that be warned me never to tell you humans." I couldn't believe he just made that dive, but I had to admit it did add to the secrecy comment.

"Emmett, this is information that can be found in most text books."

"All the same, I'm not able to give that information without authorization, and you missy don't have the authority to give it to me."

"Ohhh for the love of god," she mumbled under her breath while most of the class was still snickering about Emmett and his stupidity.

As she continued to try and calm the class down once again from Emmett's outbursts, I reverted back to dwelling on the things that I thought I had long past gotten over. Why is it that since we moved to this effing town I have had these kinds of feelings? Seriously, I knew the Cullens cared for Ness, and I also knew they have long since put our differences aside and gotten along.

As we sat there listening to this lad try to explain to these idiots who lacked the most basic knowledge of information, I decided I had to do something besides sit there, belittle myself, and continue to be a pessimist. I was never like this. Something was fucking wrong with me. Could I be getting sick? Should I have Dr. Fang take a look at me? On second thought, maybe not. I was over-thinking things. After trying my damnedest to push all thoughts aside, I began to pull my pen apart. I knew with the right amount of pressure I could make any piece go anywhere I wanted, and that was exactly what I planned to do.

With the little piece most people used to clip to the side of their paper, I applied just enough pressure as it broke off and swirled through the air, colliding into the coke can Ms. Craft had just dropped a Mentos into. The can literally spewed all over her, soaking her face, hair, and shirt. It had to have been the funniest thing I had seen in science class, and that was saying something.

"Damn, she just got a whole load blown on her."

"Holy shit, it spewed all it had all over her."

Several of the kids were snickering and giggling about random comments they were making about the can emptying its contents all over the teacher.

The entire thing was absolutely hilarious. And if to make things even better, she just stood there shock still and stared with an open mouth as the rest of the class was literally busting out laughing at the entire mess.

"Fuck…" She muttered under her breath. She then increased the volume in her voice, but not loud enough that the students could hear her over their infectious laughter, "that's never happened before. What the hell?"

As she examined the can, she noticed where the little piece of flying plastic had sliced through the side of the can, and the look on her face was priceless. She looked as if she were going to shit a brick and spontaneously combust with confusion all at the same time. I honestly don't think I have ever seen that look on anyone's face before.

The confusion finally won out as she continued to try and figure out what had happened. After a few moments, she finally composed herself enough to call the class to order. "Ummm, I'm not exactly sure what happened, but honestly, these two combinations don't usually make this big of a mess. But as you can learn from my mistakes, never make assumptions in science." And all too right she was. And little did she realize I was going to make damn sure the next pieces did the same thing. I had to see how long it would take before she would figure out something else was happening.

As she started to drop the next candy into the now fizzing liquid, I flicked yet another piece off the end of the pen. But this time, instead of going through the can, it tipped the top just after the Mentos landed in the fluid. The can spun around, tipped on its side, and spewed everywhere within a ten-foot radius. The people sitting in the front row were now soaked with a fine mist of Coke. I hadn't planned for that to happen, but it couldn't have been better. No matter how old I got, I'd never tire of having a good laugh.

"Oh. My. God!" the girl in the middle of the desk cried. "This is so not funny. What the hell is the matter with you?!" she screeched at Mrs. Craft who was nervously fidgeting with the rest of the things on the desk. She looked horrified about what happened, but I couldn't quite bring myself to feel sorry for her. Something about this whole situation didn't sit too well with me, which was ridiculously odd. I have never thought twice about giving someone shit or playing a joke on them. What the hell is the matter with me?!

I heard Emmett twist around on his stool, but I wasn't paying attention to what was going on until I heard glass shattering all over the table and floor.

"Kellan, I can't have a friend who isn't athletic! You better catch this next damn beaker," Emmett chastised. I can't believe he is doing this, its too fucking much. It took everything I had not to just bust up laughing at his stupid ass.

I continued to watch him, vibrating wickedly with silent laughter, as he picked up the next beaker and tossed it across the table to the empty seat, where presumably, Kellan was sitting. And of course, the second beaker shattered all across the table and surrounding areas.

"Damnit, Kellan, this is ridiculous. You are making me look like a flaming idiot all because you can't catch a damn beaker. It's not that freaking hard. Just catch the damn thing and throw it back. I know you can do it. Stop making me look like an idiot," Emmett was griping, when I had a brilliant idea. By this time, the entire class was watching Emmett's production.

Once again, Emmett tossed the beaker to the empty seat, only this time I rushed over to it, caught it, and tossed it back to Emmett before any human eyes could detect me. All any human saw was the beaker spin mid-air and go back to Emmett.

"Oh my god."

"Did you see that?!"

"There's no way."

"It was like a boomerang!"

Several kids were whispering at the unexplained beaker, while Emmett smiled all the wildly and proclaimed, "It's about damn time! I knew you could do it, Kellan. See it wasn't so hard, was it?!"

"Emmett! I don't know what you are trying to prove, but I suggest you clean that mess up, right now, young man!" Mrs. Craft scolded.

"But it wasn't my fault. I'm telling you, it's Kellan who couldn't catch the beaker, and I didn't even throw it very hard. I mean, anyone could have caught it. It's his fault. I think he should have to clean it up."

"I don't care who cleans it up, Emmett. All I know is it better get cleaned up before you leave school. Do you understand me?"

"But…but…but" Emmett tried, but each time he started she just held up a hand and attempted to ignore him.

"I'm not joking, Emmett. I expect this mess to be cleaned up."

"Now do you see what you've done, Kellan? All because of your stupid butterfingers. Now I gotta go and clean up the damn mess. You had better start helping me. This isn't all my fault, you know?"

Emmett continued to whine and bicker at his special friend while Mrs. Craft made the wisest decision she could have ever made and allowed all of us to leave early from class. Yes, it was only ten minutes, but that was ten minutes I could get far away from here with.

We all rose from our seats and began to file out the door, but the moment we left I felt the strange sensation come over me. I didn't know what it was; this foreign feeling made me want to go back and stay. But I couldn't go back now, if I did they would all know something wasn't right about us, something inhuman you could say. What the fuck is wrong with me?! I had to find Nessie and quick.

So tell me:

What was your fav part?

What was your fav line?

Where's the wildest place you have ever had sex with someone?

And who was it?

And would you do it again?