Hey!
FINALLY got sleep last night so feeling a lot better now...!
Thanks to everyone who reviewed saying they like the last chapter...I had about two hours sleep the night before last and well I wrote it with a huge temptation of wanting to sleep on my keyboard...:(!
*Sylvia Cullen, Raven Jadewolfe, Katie Lou Lou x, Kiss007, MissWicca, Cullengirl08, TwilightFreak13, and hnwhitlock2000 – THANK YOU SO MUCH....x x
*EllaJ 18 – You are being so kind to me with your reviews...I am flattered that people want to write their first fanfics now and I have said to others before that if you should need any help you only have to send me a message...I am NOT a great writer but I have an imagination and that's all that anyone ever needs.
I forgot to say at the beginning of last chapter that I WILL upload photos of Bella, Alice and Rosalie's dresses on my profile later on today.
Anyway that is it...Shorter today...I do NOT own Twilight..I OWN AML....
On with Chapter 27....!
(Songs for this chapter are: Half-life – Duncan Sheik
Out of Reach – Matthew Perryman Jones
You've got it bad – Usher)
*~Bella~*
I was staring at my mother intently...Still in denial whether she was really there or just a figure of my imagination, if she wasn't real and I did pinch myself to find myself waking up in my bed then Edward and my confessions to each other about our true feelings were also a lie...!
"Bella, darling...You look like you have a seen a ghost...You didn't think that I would never come and find you again" my mum said to me sweetly...It was true that I had forgotten all about her since being here with the Cullens...She was now just a distant memory of someone who used to be in my life but now had gone on her own for a while...Like some people who spend time in your life and go away and come back again.
I was still feeling the effects of Edward's kisses and he did have such passion for it...Whether he had kissed Jessica like that was still something that I didn't really want to know about just yet.
"What.....what are...you doing here?" I choked out...I could feel Edward's stare from the back of my head....Good God what the hell was he thinking? Please don't be mad at my mum or me....Wait a minute she left your life, Bella...This is your life...Edward is your life.
"I came because I have something to talk to you about, Bella" mum answered with an ueasy expression on her face...I felt sick...Not in a good way, either.
"The adoption is finalised....You won't be able to take Bella away to be her mum again" I heard Edward say behind me...His voice was not angry he was merely stating a fact...I studied my mum's face she seemed shocked for a few seconds before softening her face and smiling little.
"I am not here to take Bella away....How rude of me I haven't introduced myself...I am Renee Swan" mum was being polite about the fact that she had just seen Edward and I making out and touching each other...I could still feel the tingles on my body.
"I am Edward...Edward Cullen" Edward replied with just as much politeness...I didn't want to turn and look at his face it was possible that he would be clenching his teeth together to keep himself from throwing a fit...That was what he usually did when he was hiding something from anyone.
Mum smiled and nodded.
"Let me take you in the house" I said grabbing her hand loosely...I bent down and picked up my heels from the grass with my other hand and got to the driveway...I took the time to look back at Edward who had an apologetic smile on his face...I gave him one in response as a few moments ago we had been happy being with each other and now it would have to wait.
I led my mum into the noise of 'Do the conga' by Black lace....I don't know how the conga had anything to do with Christmas but it was funny all the same...I opened the door to see Alice leading the family in a massive conga line around the living room...They were all miming to the song looking like were all having a blast...There were a few older members of the family standing in the corner looking on but still laughing at the picture in front of them...Jesus was this awkward. I released mum's hand and took a few steps backward to where Edward was standing I leant up to his ear on my tiptoes.
"Could you let everyone know that my mum is here and I am upstairs with her...If they start to panic assure them that everything is okay" I whispered to him...He closed the front door and faced me again.
"Of course" he muttered in response...Kissing my cheek and walking to the other side of the room..I took mum's hand and led her up the stairs not looking at anything else but the floor as I did so.
I opened the door to my bedroom and led my mum inside closing the door behind me...The music now muffled slightly from downstairs.
"Wow this room is lovely, Bella" my mum remarked turning to look at me...I smiled a little and gestured to the bed mum went over and sat on it placing her hands in her lap. I stood by the window to face her fully not wanting to sit next to her just yet.
"Okay...Can you tell me why you are here please, mum?" I asked placing the heels on the floor and standing back up...The placing one of my hands on the chest of drawers next to me to keep my balance.
"I don't expect you to be happy about this, Bella and if there was any way that I could make this easier for you then I would"
"What do you mean, mum? Are you not in rehab anymore?"
"Who told you I was in rehab?"
"It's not hard to guess....You had a problem with alcohol and it seemed like the next option to make you better...I guessed that's all...No one told me where you were"
"Oh...You always were older in your mind than you were in age, Bella"
"So?"
"I DID go to rehab...I collapsed after three days" Mum's voice began to break...I got a horrible feeling in my stomach, call it intuition but this didn't look good.
"I am sorry to hear that, mum" I said genuinely...I couldn't be too mad at her for being here she was my mum after all and what kind of daughter would I be if I remained angry at her?
"They said that they couldn't do anything for me...I went to the hospital and they said that I..." mum broke off...I began to feel myself shaking from my nerves.
"Tell me; mum...It can't be that bad"
"Oh god, Bella...I am so sorry"
"Mum...For god's sake please tell me" I pleaded tears starting to fill my eyes.
"I am dying, Bella"
I lost my balance completely and fell to the floor covering my hands on my mouth...Please tell me I did not just hear that...I want this to be a dream now...Wake up, Bella...Wake up!
"They say that my liver is too damaged and that the cancer has spread too far to be curable..I have an estimated three months left of my life" WAKE UP!
"Oh, god!" I choked out my voice muffled from my hand. Mum came over and held her hands on my shoulders..I brushed her off and stood up turning away from her...This was real...Too real!
"I am so sorry, Bella....I made the decision to drink a long time ago and I have brought this all on myself...I know that I was never a good mother to you...But you're all I have" my mum choked out...I could tell that she was crying along with me...My heart was officially breaking.
"When did you find out about this?" I asked
"Last month...I have spent this month tracking down where you were...A mother has ways and means but I must ask you to do something for me, Bella...I have no right to ask you for anything after what I have put you through but think of it as my last request"
"Mum....You CAN'T be dying...Surely there is something else..Another option" I turned to face her...she shook her head through her falling tears.
What would she want me to do? There was nothing I could do for her I am not a doctor and I didn't know anything about Cancer.
"I want to die in England, Bella...Where I belong...I want you to come back with me and be there at the end."
"You're asking me to watch you die?!" I didn't mean for my words to come out like they did..Mum flinched a little but kept her facial expressions smooth.
"If there was any other way, Bella-"
"Why are you doing this to me....Now...When I have a new family and a new life here"? I exclaimed throwing my hands in the air.
"Sweetheart...Please...I need you" mum pleaded...I saw red again.
"What about all the times I needed YOU, mum?!"
"Bella-"
"Parents evenings...Variety shows...English Competitions...A hug when I was upset...Do these things ring any bells, mum!"
"I am sorry"
"What do you want me to say? Okay I will hop on a plane and travel thousands of miles back with you...Don't worry about my education...My family...My friends...I have taken care of you all my life, mum and now you are asking me to do something that I KNOW I can't do. I can't sit by and wait for you to die, mum...I love you too much and yes I do want you back in my life...I wanted you for a long time but in my head I told myself that you were getting better and that you would come and find me one day....Now you come back to me at Christmas to tell me that you are DYING" I explained...My voice a mix between anger and sadness.
"I love you, Bella...You have been an amazing daughter and you are so much stronger than I can ever hope to be...I don't know what to say and I can't condone my actions tonight because I should have waited but I had good intentions, Bella...I am still your mum and I need you now more than ever, Please baby?"
I silenced myself for a minute letting my emotions overtake me...I didn't want to yell at her anymore and I didn't want to make this situation harder than what it already was...I took a deep breath.
"Wait up here for a minute...I need to go and talk to my dad" I spoke steadily...Mum opened her mouth no doubt to comment on the fact that I now had a father but closed her mouth again...It was just as well because she could NEVER tell me who my real father was and Carlisle had been more of a father than i could have ever wished for in my wildest dreams...I knew that he would give me an honest opinion but I also knew that he wouldn't panic like Esme or Alice...I needed a steady person to help me with this...I knew what I wanted deep down but I needed to make sure that it was the right thing to do.
Mum nodded "Okay, sweetheart" she said walking back to my bed and sitting on it. I paced over to the door stopping before I got there and putting my hand on my mum's shoulder...This can't be easy for her and I didn't want her to think that her daughter had changed too much now she had been adopted.
I walked down the stairs...The music was still loud...I knew inside that my family would have kept the music on so as not to cause any suspicion..I gained a few waves from some family members and a few smiles...I returned them with as much confidence as I could muster luckily they were standing away from me and couldn't see my tears.
Without thinking I instantly walked into Carlisle's office...I was lucky to find all my family standing in there and turning to look at me with confused faces when they heard the door close...I walked towards them as one by one they made their way towards me.
"Bella are you okay?" Alice asked
I nodded and cleared my throat.
"I need to speak to dad" I stated...They all turned to look at Carlisle sitting at his desk, he nodded once and Esme, Alice, Emmett, Rose and Jasper all walked past me and out of the office together..I looked up at Edward...He knew I was upset and I could tell by the look on his face. He mouthed 'I love you' before making his way past me...His finger lightly tracing my hand...The door closed and I swallowed hard looking at my dad...He stood up from his chair.
"Come here, sweetie" he said holding his arms out...I quickly paced towards him...I landed in his chest resting my cheek on the softness of his shirt...He kissed my head once and held me tighter rocking us from side to side for a moment...I couldn't control the sobs that had violently taken over my body...Carlisle would be getting another wet shirt now thanks to me.
"Edward told us your mum was here, Bella...Is everything okay?" Carlisle soothed and I shook my head underneath him "is there anything we can do?" I pulled away from him to look up into his eyes.
"My mum's dying" I managed to say my vision once again clouded by my sadness.
Carlisle caressed both my cheeks wiping the tears away with his fingers "I am so sorry, Bella" he said...I lost all feeling in my feet as I began to fall I prepared myself to hit the hard floor but Carlisle's arms held me up...He wrapped his arms around the back of my legs and carried me over to his desk chair..He sat in it leading me into his lap with my legs hanging off the side in mid-air. He held me close as I continued to sob.
"She wants me to go back to England with her...She wants me to be ther...there...At the end" I choked out.
"What do you want, Bella?" Carlisle soothed
"I want my mum to come back to me when she is WELL...I don't know whether I can go and wait with her to die...She is my mum!"
"Bella, baby...I know you might not like me saying this but...As much as we might want to keep you here...You are connected to your mother by blood which is something that we will never have with you...You need to do what you think is right, Bella"
"I can't leave her...She hasn't been the best mum in the world but I don't think I could live myself knowing that she's died alone"
"There comes a time when we have to have battles with our hearts and our heads, Bella...Ifyou do decide to go back to England none of us would think any less of you...We would be waiting for you with open arms when you came back"
"What about school and my friends?"
"I am sure your friends would understand...Don't you worry about school you are definitely clever enough to come back after a time away...I can always ask Alice, Emmett or Edward if they could collect work for you and send it to you back home"
"You would do that?"
"Bella...We'd do anything for you...We will be behind you one hundred percent in whatever you choose"
I released my cheek from his shirt and looked up again; he smiled at me comfortingly as he took a few strands of hair from my face and put them behind my ear.
"Dad there something else I need to tell you"
"What is it, Bella?"
"It's going to sound so...Stupid and maybe even sick...But I can't help it"
"Okay?"
"I am in love with Edward"
Carlisle sighed but his face remained comforting...I carried on speaking to ease the awkwardness of my revelation. "I think in my mind I always have...Outside just now before my mum...Showed up we kind of told each other how we felt...But please don't be mad about this..I-" Carlisle placed his index finger on my lips.
"I am not mad, Bella...I am not surprised either" he said smoothly...He released his finger from my lips.
"You're not?"
Carlisle smiled..."No...Every time I would see you and Edward together you both had this look on your face and that's a look any parent would know...You only had it for each other you never had it for Alice and Emmett even though I know you all love each other...You and Edward were different."
"Oh"
" I have done things that I regret to this day, Bella....With Edward and with you...I should never have acted that way about the pregnancy test, Bella...I was scared and I instantly reacted not knowing about the pain and fear that I might have caused you-" I could see tears creep to the surface of Carlisle's eyes.
"It's okay, dad...I understand" I broke him off...He took a deep breath before continuing.
"Edward has been searching in his life for a long time...You have both been looking for something and now I can see that you have found each other and I couldn't be happier about it, Bella. It can't have been easy with your mum interrupting the moment, either"
I giggled lightly wiping the tears from my face.
"Edward is going to hate me, dad"
"He will understand, Bella...Edward is a good person and if he loves you then he will stick by you...The one thing I admire in my son is the fact that he loves purely and unconditionally he was very much like his mother that way"
"I love him so much"
Carlisle placed a kiss on my forehead "I am sure that he loves you too, Bella. So...What are you going to do?"
I sighed running my hand through my hair and licking my lips to bite down on them before speaking.
"I can't let my mum go...Not now. Is that wrong?"
"The fact that you still stick by your mum is extremely admirable, Bella....You have always had inner strength and now you can find it again to get through it. You will need this though"
Carlisle opened his drawer with one hand and pulled out an envelope...I took it in my shaking hands.
"What is it?"
"In there is a bank statement and a new card...The statement says how much is on it...I was going to save it until you turned seventeen but I think you will need it....Don't worry it has English pounds in it...You have another account with dollars in it but luckily I wasn't able to pay this in...I was going to exchange it for cash instead which is why I have kept it in here"
"Dad-"
"There's enough money on the card for you and your mum to live comfortably until you come back to us...I will check the card each month to see how you are doing and if you are running out then I will keep adding to it"
I looked up at him..."I am going to miss you so much" Carlisle's tears had escaped down his cheeks as he kissed both my cheeks...The wetness from my tears and his moulding together.
"I'll miss you too my darling daughter...I love you so much" he replied and I sobbed again...my dad and I cheek to cheek.
Once my sobs subsided I kissed his nose before climbing off of his lap...The envelope in my hand...I walked out of his office without another word or look. The house was quiet now and I am sure that the celebrations were over...I climbed the stairs to find Esme coming back down them with my mum on her arm.
"Hello Bella, I am just going to make your mum a cup of tea...Edward is up there waiting for you" God bless Esme for everything she had done for me...She was such a great mum and had been a great substitute for my biological mum. I smiled appreciatively at her and smiled at my mum before walking into my room and closing the door.
I looked at Edward who had come flying towards me to place his lips on mine...I moaned into his mouth our tongues didn't touch however as he disconnected us after a moment and wrapped his arms around me and holding me securely.
"Are you alright my Bella?" He asked.
"No" I answered
He kissed me lovingly on the cheek before bending to lift me...I wrapped my legs around his waist as he led us to the bed...I straddled his lap holding onto his shoulders my gaze on our entwined legs.
"It's my mum...She's dying" I said avoiding his gaze and putting the envelope next to us on the duvet.
Edward attacked my forehead with passionate kisses...I could feel myself melting underneath him..He was such a good kisser. "I'm sorry baby" he said...My fingers caressed his cheeks before I tugged them down...Our faces as close as we could manage without physically touching.
"I need to go back to England..Edward" I confessed...His jaw clenched slightly as I bit my lip "don't hate me, Edward...I need to be with my mum right now" I said...He suddenly grabbed my waist with both his hand and led me backwards onto the bed...I landed with my back on the mattress as he hovered over the top of me...He connected our mouths again his tongue soon touching my lower lip for entrance...I gave it to him as we let our tongues and mouths mouth once more in the best way possible...More tears fell down my cheeks...Edward had never kissed me like this, there was desire and longing in the way that his lips moved on mine never leaving any area untouched...He moved his mouth from my lips to my jaw..Kissing along one side before lifting his head back up...His own tears had began to fall as well.
"Bella....You have only just been made mine" he choked out...My heart felt like it had been put in a blender in that moment. "Please don't leave me" he pleaded as he kissed my forehead...He wasn't angry...He was heartbroken or at least he would be.
"Edward I am sorry" I said my voice also on the verge of breaking completely "I have to be with my mum..."
"God Bella...I love you so much...I don't think I could live without you...Is there anything I could do to make you stay?" Edward was still kissing every area of my face but not with the intent to persuade me to stay but because I could feel the love he felt for me...For once I felt completely loved in my life and as usual there was always something in the way of my happy ending.
"Edward...If your mum were to be alive and she said to you that she needed you to be with her as she was dying would you just leave her?" I asked him my voice smooth...I didn't feel any anger for the fact that he wanted me to stay I was more overwhelmed.
"No...You're right, Bella...I DO understand I just don't want it to be now...I don't want you to leave me just as we are FINALLY together" I grabbed his shoulders and pulled him upwards...We swayed together up to where he was sitting underneath me again my legs around his waist...I stroked both his cheeks with my hands.
"Edward...Look at me" he looked up at me his stunning evergreen eyes piercing my soul "I will NEVER leave you...Believe me when I say that....I am SO in love with you, Edward...I will come back and be with you..I know that I can't live without you either...You just have to wait for me...Can you do that for me?"
"I would wait forever for you, Bella" Edward stated his voice still clouded with emotion...His tears had now reached his chin as more began to fall from his eyes.
"Don't hate me..Edward"
"I could never hate you, Bella...It's not possible." Edward took a deep breath "I suppose I should give you your Christmas present now"
I don't know how he did it but Edward reached down to my bedroom floor with one hand his eyes still on mine and brought up two wrapped boxes...One small and square whilst the other was bigger and more rectangular.
"You open them for me" I said to him...He unwrapped the bigger one first taking the item out of it and holding it out to me....It was a mobile phone.
"Edward-" I began
"It's all sorted...It has mine, Carlisle's, Esme's, Alice's, Emmett's, Rose's and Jasper's numbers all in it...It saves paper and it will be nice to know that I will be able to talk to you whenever I want without waiting for mail" he admitted and I smiled...I was about to open my mouth to thank him before he started unwrapping the smaller one...He opened the red velvet top and turned the box around in his hands to face me...I gasped.
Inside the box was a silver locket..Medium sized not too large and not too small the chain was a straight and wavy design and there was a little clear stone on top of the locket that sparkled in the light.
"Open it, Bella" Edward said...I rested my shaking fingertips on the locket and pulled the two halves of it apart...Inside the locket was a black and white family picture set in the circle of all the Cullens...My family. I shed new tears....I had never imagined Edward would give me such a gift and I never imagined that he would be as thoughtful but I was so grateful to be wrong. I closed the locket and popped the lid down...I took the box and the phone from his hands and placed them with my envelope next to us.
"When did you get that picture done?!" I exclaimed
"When you were in the hospital" Edward replied.
"I love you Edward Cullen" I said before snaking my hands around his shoulders and pulling him to me...I put as much passion and love into my kiss as I could manage...He responded eagerly stroking my hair with one hand and one of my cheeks with another.
"I love you too Bella Swan...Always" he said against my lips as we disconnected completely. "I guess I should help you pack" he choked out...I kissed him again not wanting to hear him upset.
We then both got up and did the impossible thing that people do when they say goodbye...I would be leaving the love of my life behind me for a time and even though I wanted to crumble and say that I would stay I owed it to my mum to be there for her...I knew now that the Cullens would be waiting for me.
Once I had finished packing I had told Edward to stay in my room with my bag until I came back from seeing Alice and Emmett...I didn't know who to go for when I stood in the hallway...They would both persuade me not to go so I suppose I couldn't win either way...I went up to Emmett's room first knocking on the door.
"Come in" I heard Emmett's voice against the door... I turned the doorknob and opened his door to find him and Rose sitting together on the bed...They both stood up the same way Carlisle had done when they realised it was me. Without closing the door I walked to the centre of the room and standing still.
"I am going to England" I stated wanting to get my confession over with "my mum is dying of liver cancer and she wants me to be with her when she goes" I said feeling my emotion through my torso once again...This is probably the hardest thing I have ever had to do.
"Oh god, Bella" Rose said as she walked towards me and held me in a hug...I left my arms at my side and looked over at Emmett who had also begun to shed tears.
"How long will you be gone?" He choked out attempting to keep his voice steady but failing.
"I don't know...I am sorry that I am ruining everyone's Christmas" I said..Rose released her hold and faced me stroking my hair.
"Bella you haven't ruined anything...We are not going to ask you stay even though I can say for both myself and Emmett that we want to...You have to do what you think is right, Bella" she said...I was so thankful for everyone's understanding of my choice and in a way, it made me saying goodbye to them harder.
Emmett stood up from the bed...Rose moved out the way as Emmett gave me a bear hug kissing me on the cheek before resting his head on my shoulder...I wrapped my arms around his back.
"I love you so much Bella-boo...I am going to miss you" Emmett cried into my shoulder I wrapped my arms tighter around him.
"I love you too" I said...Rose wrapped her arms around myself and Emmett then...I know what they wanted to say and what they both preferred me to do...If there was another way to ensure that my mum gained a full recovery then I would have stayed with all of them here, too...In a heartbeat.
When we all parted I sniffed "thank you for my present by the way"
"You're welcome" Emmett said with a smile.
"Are you going tonight?" Rose asked.
"I don't know..Probably" I replied and she nodded in understanding.
"Will you come downstairs and say goodbye to me...I need to go and see Alice first but-"
"Of course we will, Bella boo" Emmett broke me off...He followed me out of the room his arm tight around Rose...We parted as Emmett and Rose went down the stairs and I went further down the hallway to Alice's room. The door was open so I just let myself in.
I almost wished I hadn't interrupted when I saw Alice and Jasper standing in front of her large mirror..Jasper had his arms around Alice and his hands were on his stomach..Her hands were on top of his...Once they saw my reflection in the mirror they turned around together and released their hold on each other.
"Bella what's happened?" Alice asked skipping towards me.
"I am sorry, Alice...I am going home..My mum has cancer and is dying...I need to be with her" I said..Alice covered her hands with her mouth as her emotion took over her.
"Alice...Please don't cry..The baby" I said my voice choking.
"I am sorry, Bella" she said lifting her hands off her mouth "That's awful...I just don't know what to say...Are you going tonight?"
"I think so" I replied as her tears fell further down her face...I looked over at Jasper who had his head bowed to the floor...It didn't take a genius to figure out that he was affected by my revelation as well.
"I love you, Alice" I said wrapping my arms around her tightly she sobbed into my shoulder.
"I suppose...There...is nothing-"
"No Alice..I would stay you know I would but I can't"
"I understand...She's...Your...Mom"
"Thank you"
"You have been...The best...Sister, Bella." Alice choked as we parted I wiped a few tears from her face and then looked down at her tummy.
I knelt down to my knees and held her stomach lightly in both my hands and stroked her unborn baby once before placing a kiss in the centre.
"Goodbye, little one" I said to her stomach..Alice let a sob out through her body forcing her stomach to shudder slightly...I got back up to standing.
"Alice...Please" I pleaded...The last thing I needed was for her to put stress on herself and her baby she nodded smiling a little in understanding.
I looked over at Jasper who was now facing me again.
"Will you take care of them for me?" I asked him indicating that I was talking about Alice and his child...I didn't know whether it would be awkward for him to hug me..We had only hugged once and I didn't know him as well as Rose because we hadn't talked as much...However Jasper strode towards me and pulled me into a hug.
"I will, Bella...Thank you for everything" he said soothingly as I nodded into his shoulder..We pulled apart quickly as Jasper took hold of Alice's hand. I took Alice's other hand and led her out of my room...I walked down to the floor of mine and Edward's room to see Rose and Emmett talking to Edward who was standing at my door. They all looked over to me as I walked towards them..I nodded to them not wanting to speak..I released Alice's hand and went down the stairs first as they all followed in pursuit behind me.
I walked over to the kitchen and saw my mum, Esme and Carlisle standing there..Esme had been crying as her eyes were puffy and I was glad that I wouldn't have to tell her...I probably couldn't handle having to explain my decision one more time. I looked over at my mum who was looking back at me.
"Come on" I said to my mum..She smiled appreciatively at me before standing up and taking my hand..We all gathered in the living room...I looked at all the Cullens'.
"Here are two tickets for a flight at 2am...There is also a cab waiting outside to take you to the airport...It's already been paid for...I would take you, Bella but I have been drinking."
Carlisle placed the tickets into my hand "you won't have to use your Christmas present now" he added and I smiled. Edward handed me my bag and I took it...I was about to place it over my shoulder before I tugged my hand out of my mum's and landed in all of the arms of my family...They all hugged me and each other together...It was another moment where we didn't need words and even if we had words we wouldn't be able to express what we truly felt because my mum was also in the room.
"Thank you to you all for taking care of Bella" my mum said genuinely. I let go of my family.
I turned around picking up my bag and opening the front door and there on the driveway was a yellow taxi...I was about to stop and say to Carlisle that I still had his coat on but I wanted to keep something of my dad with me...Even if I had tried to give it back he would have demanded I keep it anyway.
I opened the door of the taxi and put my bag in as my mum climbed in the other side...I turned to face my family who were all gathered on the front steps of the house...I blew them a kiss before climbing in the taxi and closing the door...I put a hand on the window and waved timidly..The Cullens' blew me kisses one by one as the taxi moved taking them away into the distance.
I sunk back in the seat without looking at my mum...
Everyone I loved including my boyfriend were now going to be far away...I couldn't regret my decision or be mad at myself for making it...If I were in my mum's shoes I would want my daughter's decision to be the same as mine.
I just couldn't stop the pain.
*~Edward~*
The minute you have the thing you desire above all else...You never know when they will just go one minute...My Bella...The love of my life had gone and there was nothing I could have done to stop her.
I didn't hate her and I wasn't angry at her mum, either...I would have done exactly what she had done if I were in Bella's shoes.
I ran through the front door and up to my room slamming the door behind me and landing on my bed face down..I let myself cry it out...I was so in love with Bella...There were no words to describe it...The fact that she loved me too made me ecstatic above anything else...Now I would have to make do without her for a while whether I liked it or not.
I heard my door open slowly and after a few moments a hand was on my shoulder..I looked up from the pillow to find both my mum and my dad standing there...I turned my body round and sat up...Dad and mum sat either side of me and held me from either side...Dad rubbed my shoulder and my mum stroked my cheeks.
I sobbed until I fell asleep.
*~Bella~*
(Later)
I tied the airplane seat belt around my waist and looked out of the window.
"I want to say thank you, darling" my mum said as I turned to face her "I love you so much and I appreciate this...So much more than you will ever know. I am so sorry that you have to leave the Cullens they seemed like an amazing family"
"They are" I choked out...I sank into her shoulder the final tears shedding from my eyes...Mum stroked my face as the plane moved from the airport.
I would be going home....I couldn't find any positive things about that fact but I made the choice...I just wish that I didn't have to leave Edward behind....
I hoped that he was okay.
I do NOT know whether ANY planes fly out on Boxing day or whether you can get hold of tickets but pretend it does for the sake of AML .
ALSO don't hate Renee or Bella for what they each have done...I KNOW what I am doing and it's like people say 'absence makes the heart grow fonder'.
Bella WON'T be away in England for long...I PROMISE...She needs to say goodbye to her mum properly and it is only natural considering Bella is the only thing her mum has left.
I DID find this chapter VERY emotional so I REALLY hope you liked it.
Review and tell all...
Lots of love
.S. x