Author's Note: The following Chapter contains the full lyrics of the songs I penned for this story. They're totally created and owned by me (whether that would be a good or a bad thing, I'll let you decide. ^^) They're also posted on my DeviantArt account - minus "Signs" (which is actually a different handle than I have here).
I've been a poet for more than 12 years, and I've written songs for about that long as well, though by measure of the word, I'm not (and definitely by no means) a professional singer - I just love to write and make melodies in my head from time to time. I hope you find something in them to enjoy, even if you have to come up with your own melodies to match them.
"Song to Fly"
Verse 1:
Stuck in a corner tryin' to figure why
The words won't come out
Screen's burning on my eye
Makes me wanna shout
Rather be in another place
Just strumming my guitar on the run
You think I'm trying to save face
But I'm just having fun
In the place where we are now
We can't speak the words
Try to reach you, someway, somehow
Songs soaring like the birds.
Bridge:
Tryin' to find somewhere to be
Other than this cage
That's why I want you to see me
Lighting up the stage!
Chorus:
I will go on, and set the day
Playin' my own way-
I feel the fire lighting up my heart
Playin' what I wanna say
Don't you go on, tellin' me not to try
I know that I can get by
Cause there's nothing tearin' me apart
That's why it's my song - my song to fly.
Verse 2:
Twenty four hours turns to seventy two
Waiting in this box
Seems much longer since I heard from you
Are we really on the rocks?
Hard to tell you when I'm flyin' solo
Strikes my soul with the blues
But I find that I don't feel so low
When I'm revin' up my tunes.
Music takes me away in the fantasy
Soaring through the clouds
And from there, I imagine you seeing me
In front of the screaming crowds!
Bridge:
Tryin' to find somewhere to be
Other than in this cage
That's why I want you to see me
Lighting up the stage!
Chorus:
I will go on, and set the day
Playin' my own way -
I feel the fire lighting up my heart
Playin' what I wanna say!
Don't you go on, tellin' me not to try
I know that I can get by
Cause there's nothing tearin' me apart
That's why it's my song - my song to fly.
Verse 3:
I don't wanna be anywhere else,
but it tears me apart from you.
I can't play this game for life
If it's just between us two.
Bridge:
Tryin' to find somewhere to be
Other than in this cage
That's why I want you to see me
Lighting up the stage!
Chorus:
I will go on, and set the day
Playin' my own way -
I feel the fire lighting up my heart
Playin' what I wanna say!
Don't you go on, tellin' me not to try
I know that I can get by
Cause there's nothing tearin' me apart
That's why it's my song - my song to fly.
"Signs"
Verse set 1:
I never saw the reason, or played a game for two
Maybe your smile's the only thing I saw in you,
Are you the person I knew, or an eclipse of illusion?
Dealing this awkward hand, while playing with delusion.
You're telling me that it's not the same,
But I don't buy it, I don't play the same game.
Chorus:
I see all the signs that are telling me no
And you need time for your heart to grow, yeah
When I call you out, you say there's nothing that you can do.
I'm not staying, boy we're through - I'm through with you.
Verse 2:
Boy, you bewitch me all the time
I'm the rhythm in your broken rhyme.
It's the same deal, no matter how you're feelin'
You play a joker's hand - you send me reelin'.
You think I watch the world, hanging by a thread bare
But I don't call it, I see what's really there.
Chorus:
I see all the signs that are telling me no
And you need time for your heart to grow, yeah
When I call you out, you say there's nothing that you can do.
I'm not staying, boy we're through - I'm through with you.
Verse 3:
You change things to go your way, but I don't fit
The poisoned apple that I've already bit.
You flow through me, hit me like a shockwave
Next minute, I know I can't be saved.
You think I'm crazy to read it on a tarot card,
But believe me boy, I'm not taking leaving that hard.
End Chorus
I see all the signs that are telling me no
And you need time for your heart to grow, yeah
When I call you out, you say that life's no clover
I'm not staying, boy we're through - and now it's over.
"Fortune Smiles"
When Fortune smiles, she's watchin' you
When Fortune smiles, there's no gettin' through
Verse set 1:
Half past midnight, I'm undercover
Sounds echoing through my room.
Don't know why, but know there's another
Try to hide, but I know it's coming soon.
When I look 'round, in a different place
Can we leave the light on, just a little longer?
Cold and dark, my heart starts to race
See her face, and wish I were a little stronger.
Chorus:
When Fortune smiles, she's watchin' you
When Fortune smiles, there's no gettin' through
When Fortune smiles, she's watchin' you
Verse set 2:
In the nightlight, think I see a shadow
Doesn't matter, 'cause I know how to run
Creep beside me, just by the window
Run so far, hope I'll soon see the sun
Watch and wait, reflections of the mask
Empty now, dark eyes take a glance
Then I see strangers from the past
Better stand now if we'll stand a chance.
Chorus:
When Fortune smiles, she's watchin' you
When Fortune smiles, there's no gettin' through
When Fortune smiles, she's watchin' you.
Verse set 3:
I know that it seems a little scary
We can laugh our way through
Even when things lose a little clarity,
I'll still find my way back to you.
Fortune's on my side, turn the tables now
Sleep in peace, as they ride the night away.
We'll stand together and pull her out
Passing eyes greet the brand new day.
When Fortune smiles, she's watchin' you
Feel her embrace 'cause her time is due
When Fortune smiles, she's watchin' you
When tables turn, Fortune will pull you through.
"Fact in Fiction"
Verse set 1
"Why does it always feel like something's wrong?
Tell me when something better's gonna come along.
Trust me it's a fact, it's not like I'm much of a scaredy cat
Just don't know when something's at my back...
Try to understand the way I feel -
Tell the difference between what's fake and real.
Is the world a sphere that sat or was it really one time flat?
(Come on already, history's already proven that!)
Chorus 1:
Where can I find the fact in fiction?
It's not a matter of what's now or tradition.
The truth's spinnin' round my head,
I just want to wake up in my bed
And pretend like I wasn't here.
Verse set 2
Why do we have to see what's beyond that door?
It's not like we don't know what we're looking for.
Might be a beast with teeth, looking for something to eat,
And I wanna be on the next block down the street!
Who is that man I'm seeing through?
Not that I mind, but there's more than a few.
Some of them look too cold, and others look real old...
(I had no idea that he was this bold!)
Chorus 2:
Where can I find the fact in fiction?
Everywhere I turn, there's a new expedition.
Discovering keys on the lam
But I'm sitting quiet like a clam
Please, can you make the truth real clear?
As I'm looking down this big, old hall
I want you to look inside your crystal ball
See if my future's looking bright...
Lady Luck, please be kind
Please tell me what we'll find,
There's no telling what we'll see tonight...
Chorus 3:
Where can I find the fact in fiction?
If I'm lucky, I'll end up in my kitchen
Something warm and maybe with meat...
(Do you always think of something to eat?!)
I'm always hungry when I'm feeling fear...
Chorus 4:
Where can I find the fact in fiction?
Something's gotta ease this tension.
How will I ever understand?
Guess all I'll do is lend a hand
And hope that danger isn't too near.
Chorus 1:
Where can I find the fact in fiction?
It's not a matter of what's now or tradition.
The truth's spinnin' round my head,
I just want to wake up in my bed
And pretend like I wasn't here.
Author's Note Part Deux: A little about "Alvin's Ghost" for those of you interested in hearing "the story behind the story."
It started as an idea back in early 2007 when I allowed myself to write in multiple veins while working on a novel (which I'm still in the process of finishing - figure that one out ^^). I don't usually get writer's block because I do a lot of freewriting, and this was one of the products of one of my freewriting ventures. I actually didn't start writing the story until the summer of that year - I had the plan and outlines for it completely drafted - and I rewrote parts of the last three chapters for flow and content issues, and found myself strained to come up with Chapter names, but it was all finally finished this year. I should note that the mythos surrounding the Hanti and the Ilreita was completely fiction - and part of my way of weaving it through the story.
One thing you might not have noticed is that the chapter names for each of the stories featured here are actually song titles or lyrics from songs. Some of them were directly linked to the ones that I featured above, but others are actually songs that I listened to while penning the chapters. Here they are, in the order of the chapters they appear:
Chapter 1: Fortunes
(title inspired by the song "Fortunes" by The Primroses/Jason Rose)
Chapter 2: Fact in Fiction (original song)
Chapter 3: Noise
(inspired by the song "Noise" by Beat Happening)
Chapter 4: Deja Vu
(I know people are going to see this and think of Beyonce's song, but it was actually inspired by the song "Deja Vu" by Randall Shreve)
Chapter 5: Strange Things
(inspired by the song "Strange Things" by Randy Newman - it's from the Toy Story soundtrack ^^)
Chapter 6: Sixth Sense
(inspired by the song "Sixth Sense" by Donna Lewis. Lyrically it's quite dark, but in terms of musical tone/instrumentation - I tend to think of this as Anilie's theme song.)
Chapter 7: Ghost in my Room
(inspired by the song "Ghost in my Room" by Group Therapy)
Chapter 8: Signs (original song)
Chapter 9: Run, Run, Run
(inspired by the song "Run, Run, Run" by The Who)
Chapter 10: Everybody Wants to Rule the World
(inspired by the song "Everybody Wants to Rule the World" by Tears for Fears)
Chapter 11: Passion Colors Everything
(inspired by the song "Passion Colors Everything" by Poets of the Fall)
Chapter 12: Fortune Smiles (original song)
You can find all of these songs, except those designated as original songs or exceptions, on Itunes if you're curious about how they sound. At least last I checked. I penned four songs originally for this story, with an alternate version of "Signs" that could count as a fifth. I may or may not replace "Signs" with its amended version. The one I included here was the first draft of the story and it was the only one of the songs that I wasn't quite satisfied with. If I do, I'll update this page.
I figured this was as good of a story to share as anything else. It's one of the stories I loved writing, but never had the chance to share it until now.
My thanks again to all of you whom have read and commented on the story collectively - I really, really appreciate it. All feedback - comments, questions, and constructive critique - are definitely things I appreciate wholeheartedly.
~Twinrose84