School life. SasuHina: Our Childish dream. Ch14.
They were walking trough hospital corridors. Hinata noticed blond women running around and looking inside every ward. –Tsunade-san! – She yelled out loud for Tsunade to hear her. –Hinata! – She yelled and rushed towards Hinata. Tsunade hugged Hinata tightly and sighed in relief. –What happened Tsunade-san? – Hinata asked and answered on Tsunade's hug. –Hinata, I was so worried. I heard that some girl collapsed all of a sudden and after I heard it was you, I already was running around and searching for you. I was so worried! – Tsunade said and her body lightly trembled. –It's okay Tsunade-san. – Hinata said softly and smiled. They were still hugging each other. –What happened to you Hinata? – Tsunade asked and let Hinata go. Hinata smiled at her. –I am fine Tsunade-san. I just didn't sleep well last night. Doctor said that after I get sleep tonight I will be okay. As if this never happened. – Hinata turned her eyes on Sasuke and then laughed. –I made everyone worry about me so much, yet nothing really happened. – Hinata looked back at Tsunade and again softly smiled. *Why is she lying? Why…?* Thought Sasuke as he looked at Tsunade, who was just sighting in relief at Hinata. –Thank goodness! I really went over the top worrying. I know you are strong Hinata, yet I can't help myself, to worry! – Tsunade smiled and laughed lightly. –It's okay Tsunade-san. See you later. – Said Hinata and passed Tsunade. –See you later dear! – Yelled Tsunade and only then noticed that Sasuke was right beside Hinata, walking behind her as if watched over so Hinata wouldn't fall on the ground if she collapsed again. *Strange…* Thought Tsunade and walked towards her office.
They walked out of hospital and turned their way to Konoha's central street. -Sasuke I am fine now, you can stop worrying! – Said Hinata as she noticed that Sasuke was watching over her. –Why did you lied to that woman? – Asked Sasuke but he still didn't changed his position. Sasuke's instincts were telling him to stay like that. –You mean Tsunade? Actually I didn't lied. Okay, maybe little bit. I just don't want her to worry about me. Did you saw her today? She was so worked up and worried. I don't want to be a bother to someone. I will feel guilty if I will be a bother. – Hinata quickly said and suddenly stopped. They were standing in front of kids play ground. She sadly smiled and started to walk again. –I understand what do you mean by that, yet you shouldn't lie to her. – Sasuke said and then finally changed his position. He was walking right next to her. –No Sasuke, you don't understand and you never will understand. – Hinata sadly looked at Sasuke. *Why is she so sad? What should I do? * Thought Sasuke.
After five minutes they were in Sasuke's apartment. –It's small. – Said Sasuke when they walked in. Hinata looked around. *Small bedroom, small kitchen, small toilet and instead of bath there is only shower. No living-room.* Thought Hinata, when she looked around. –I guess we will live in my apartment. Or should I say in ours? – Hinata said and walked to kitchen. –Sasuke, I will prepare something to eat and drink because my story will take some time. – Hinata said and started to prepare something to eat. She couldn't prepare anything much because Sasuke didn't had many products.
After half an hour Hinata placed something to eat and drink on table. She prepared coffee to drink as Sasuke didn't had anything else. They didn't talked while they were eating. After they eat, Hinata washed dishes and sat in front of Sasuke. –It's really hard to start telling. – Hinata sadly looked at her hands. *Should I really tell him?* Thought Hinata. –It's okay. I will try to understand. – Sasuke said and looked out of the window then looked at his watch. *It's already 6:56 PM...* Thought he and sighed. -Sasuke, you will have to believe me, of course I know, after your parents died, your mind closed its way to your memories about your parents and your first six living years, but I will try to open up your mind. – Hinata said and sighed. –How do you know about it? – Sasuke asked shocked. –Do you want to hear the whole story? – Hinata said angrily. -I understand. – Sasuke said and looked deep in Hinata's eyes. *Such an innocent look…* Thought he. Hinata sighed again.
-First time we met when we were three years old. Our mothers were best friend since they were ten years old and so they wanted us to meet too. – Sasuke nodded as if proving that he was listening. They didn't broke eye contact even for a short moment. –I clearly remember that happy look on your face. You were really happy yet we were too shy to talk. That day we started talked because I feel down and hurt myself. I started to cry, but you calmed me and helped me to stand up. You had such a cute expression! At that moment I understand that you will be my best friend. Next time we met two days later. We started to talk more openly and a few days later we were already acting like best friend. I was really happy and you were too. Time passed and we started to play games like we were family. I was wife and you husband and my doll was our children. – Hinata lightly laughed. *So cute…* Thought Sasuke. -Not so long after we started to play those games, we were running around every were and telling that we want to marry each other. When our mothers heard that, they just smiled at it as if agreeing on that. – Hinata paused as she wanted to breathe deeply. *Why I can't remember anything about it!? I need to remember…* Thought Sasuke angrily.
-After some time, when we were five years old, we made a promise that we will marry when we will grow up. That day I told my mother about our promise. She didn't acted as always, this time she said 'Don't worry darling, your mommy will take care about this. Your mommy will make sure that you will marry Sasu-kun.' And yes Sasuke I was calling you Sasu-kun and you were calling me Hina-chan back then. At that moment I had no intention that mother would do something like this. – Hinata closed her eyes. *Mother…* She thought and sighed. –Anyway, after a year your parents died and you lost your memory. I was so worried and sad that my Sasu-kun didn't remember me. From the beginning I was trying to do something that would have helped you to remember me, yet you shove me of like I was one of your stupid fan girls. – Hinata laughed as Sasuke was sitting there in shock. *What have I done..!?* He thought. –I clearly remember what you said to me one day. 'Don't come near me. I hate stupid fan girls. I don't want to see someone, as ugly as you, around me. I don't know you and never want to know you. You're stupid, ugly, strange and insane. I hate those kinds of girls like you. Going around after me expecting sympathy - stupid fan girls. ' I remember that I couldn't go to school for three days. – Hinata's look saddened. –Why? - Asked Sasuke. –I was crying those three days and when I finally calmed myself I gave up. We were in 5th grade then. Five years I was trying my best to make you remember and in the end I gave up. Few days later my mother did suicide and I was totally broken. I don't think you ever noticed that I was watching over you from a corner of my eye. When I was 14 years old my father took me out of your school and I wasn't able to see you. – Hinata smiled.
-When I started to go to school again, I was kind of unhappy that we were in the same class. – Hinata smiled at Sasuke. –Why unhappy? – Sasuke asked and turned his gaze away. –Because every time I look in your eyes, I remember our childhood. I remember how happy you were back then yet your eyes are cold and pain full right now – Hinata said sadly. –Every time I look at you, I remember our childhood. It was so easy to live then! – Sais Hinata and drank out her coffee. –Why you didn't said anything to me when you started to come to school again? Why you acted as if you don't know anything? – He asked and his eyes looked up and down Hinata's face as if trying to remember every part of it. –And what was I suppose to say? 'Hi Sasu-kun! I am Hina-chan from your childhood. You don't remember me because of your parent's death but we were childhood friends and we promised to marry each other!' Was I supposed to say that? – Sharply asked Hinata. –No but you could at least try to do something. – Sasuke looked at Hinata's expression. *She looks so hurt. As if she is going to cry…* Thought Sasuke. –Oh..! So I was supposed to do something so I could be throw away like one of your damn fan girls and so I could be hurt again!? You except me to let you hurt me every time we meet just because you don't remember me!? I am just a girl who wanted to be by your side like I was in the past but I gave up! I promised that I will not let you hurt me again. Those words, which you said back then, hurt me deeply. I feel sorry for you! – Hinata said sharply and little bit lauder than before. –Why you feel sorry? – Sasuke asked as if Hinata didn't said anything except the last sentence. –Ha..!Why I feel sorry? Because you will have to marry and live, at least for two years, whit me. Whit one of your damn fan girls. Whit such an ugly, stupid, strange and insane girl. I feel sorry for you. – Hinata said and stood up. She didn't said anything, just walked towards bathroom. Sasuke noticed that her cheeks were wet. *What have I done to this girl? Such a sweet, poor and innocent thing. I am so stupid… Why I had to forget her?* He thought and heard that someone turned on a tap.
Hinata washed her face and walked out from bathroom. –Sorry Sasuke. I didn't expected that my own feelings will break out. – Hinata smiled, yet her smile was sad. *Why did I agree to tell him? I knew I will cry… I knew I will break… Why then Hinata?* She thought. Sasuke stood up and walked towards Hinata. He wiped away Hinata's tears. *Why I am crying!? Why? I just now calmed…* Thought Hinata. She panicked. –Don't worry. It's okay to cry sometimes. – Sasuke said in a calming voice. Hinata pushed back from Sasuke. –No! It's not okay whit me. All these years I was able to control my feelings. I was able to be strong, yet these past two years is like hell. It's as if I am burning from inside. Past two years, it's as if everyone is trying to break me. – Hinata said and her kneels loosened and she feel down on the ground. –Shit! Why now? Why? – She said more to herself. –Hinata I am sorry that I don't remember anything. I am really sorry for hurting you… - Sasuke said and in his voice was heard a hint of pity. –Oh no Sasuke… Don't apologize. I am the one at fault. You're not at fault that your parents died and your mind closed. I am just stupid and weak so I am trying to find someone else who could be at fault. Sorry. – Hinata said and got up whit Sasuke's help. –Is there anything else you want to know? – Hinata asked. *I want to know everything about you…* Thought Sasuke, yet he shake his head as saying no.
Sasuke turned his gaze out of the window and sighed. –It's already dark outside. – Said Sasuke and Hinata turned her gaze on window too. –Yeah. – She said and they stood up. –Maybe you will stay here? We are soon getting married. – Said Sasuke and Hinata nodded. They walked to Sasuke's bedroom and Sasuke changed. –Can you give me something to sleep in? – Asked Hinata and Sasuke pulled out from closed an old t-shirt. –Thanks. – Said Hinata and changed.
Both of them were lying in bed. Sasuke was thinking about their childhood and Hinata was nervously biting her lip. –Do you really don't want to know anything else? – Suddenly asked Hinata. *Incident…* Thought Sasuke. -About that incident. I guess you should know. – Hinata said and turned so she would face Sasuke. –Remember I said I am not a virgin? – Hinata asked. Sasuke nodded. –I… Actually I was raped. – Said Hinata and blushed. Sasuke's eyes widened. *Raped..! Hinata was raped!?* He thought. –It did Orochimaru. I can't say that it was his fault; I was the cause to it. I never ever thought about how he would feel around me. I was acting as freely as is he was my boyfriend. – Hinata said and hid her face, *No, it's not your fault!* Thought Sasuke, while his face stayed calm. –And yesterday, when you came to my apartment, you actually tried to do something. You said you wanted to have sex whit me. – Hinata said and sadly smiled. *Now I can feel more freely.* Thought Hinata. *What..!? I said that? Sasuke you're a real bastard! Hinata was raped and you did that kind of thing!* Thought Sasuke. –Don't worry about yesterday. You didn't know and I am already over whit that rape thing. – Hinata softly smiled and then turned away from Sasuke as If showing that she is going to sleep. Sasuke went to sleep too.