Spoiler Alert: Don't read this spoiler if you don't want to know about tonight's episode of SVU. We bid a fond farewell to a great character on tonight's episode. Honestly I was actually upset after seeing the episode. My boyfriend turned to me at then end and asked if I was angry and I looked at him and said 'no, I'm in mourning.' Now back to my story…
Chapter Five: The Calm Before the Storm
Sunday August 16th, 07:30
It was on extremely rare occasion that Jess slept in this late. She thumbed her iPhone awake and a text message was waiting for her. "Miss u. When will I c u?" It was from Dick. Jess took the phone and padded, barefoot, out of her room, down the hall, into the living room and to the door the apartment. She retrieved the paper, picked up her laptop and headed for the kitchen. After putting on music, Jess dumped the contents of her arms onto the kitchen table. She unzipped the bag pulled out her laptop. She IM'd Dick that they could get together tomorrow before her baseball game if he was free. She did not expect him to answer; it was really early by most teenagers' standards.
Olivia and Alex woke and did their usual morning routine; although it never felt routine, it felt like the first time all over again. They joined Jess in the kitchen for breakfast. After breakfast Jess showered while Alex and Olivia made sandwiches for lunch on the sailboat. The teen met the women in the living room. Alex was wearing light blue jean capris and a white baby-doll t-shirt. Olivia was wearing kaki coloured capris and a black ribbed tank top. Jess wore white and brown board shorts and a white top that could double as a rash guard. She had her laptop bag slung across her body and was shoving her iPhone into a pocket on her shorts. Alex shook her head. "You are not bringing your laptop with you."
Jess frowned and shot Alex a look. "What? Why?"
Alex raised her right eyebrow. "You know why."
Jess sighed. Alex was right. It had sort of been decided yesterday between the two of them that Jess needed a break. Not just from the case but from the computer and life in general. "Okay, I'll leave the laptop, but I keep the phone."
Alex smiled. "Deal"
Olivia was impressed. It had pretty much only taken a raised eyebrow from Alex to reason with Jess. The blondes definitely had a connection. The shorter one took her laptop back to her room. She turned it on and took the tiny GPS tracking device Morales had given her the day before out of her pocket. She opened the tracking program on her computer and linked the device with the program. They connected just like Bluetooth connects things. She slipped the tiny disk between the rubber case that protected her phone and the phone itself. Morales had given it to her just before they left to go up to the One-six yesterday evening, feeling that she had earned it for all the work she had done. Jess left her room and met Olivia and Alex in the living room.
The women got up off the couch and they all left the apartment. They piled into Alex's SUV and she drove to the West 79th Street Boat Basin. Olivia had known Alex owned a sailboat but like so many other things the pair had not had the time to actually be on it together. Alex had taken Jess and Dick out on it a bunch of times over the summer, but Olivia had always been working. She parked the SUV in a spot. Jess grabbed the small cooler that had the sandwiches and beverages in it and headed for the slip Alex's sailboat was docked in. Jess wanted to give Olivia and Alex as much time alone as possible, she knew the brunette had never been here before.
The detective watched Jess head down to a dock, across it and disappear onto a large vessel. Olivia looked at Alex wide-eyed. "That's your sailboat?"
The corners of Alex's mouth tugged up in a smile. "Yes, what where you expecting?"
Olivia was speechless. "I'm not sure. Not this."
The sailboat was more of a sail yacht than anything else. It was a fifty-foot Valiant Center Island Queen. The hull was navy blue and the rest of the boat was white, with white sails. As the blonde and the brunette walked towards the vessel, Alex took Olivia's hand in hers. They could see Jess walking around the deck of the boat. "Our daughter likes your yacht."
Alex chuckled. "Yes, she does and you will too, Liv."
As they approached the vessel the name of the yacht came into view. "Reflections" was scrolled across the stern of the boat. Alex boarded the sailboat first and helped Olivia on. Although the brunette had never been on Alex's boat before she liked it already. The A.D.A. and Jess settled into a routine. Olivia realized it appeared to be old hat for both of them. Alex was at the helm of the vessel but the shorter blonde was definitely needed in order to maneuver the boat. Before Olivia realized it they were out of the slip, marina and heading south on the Hudson River. Once they had settled onto the river Alex steered the boat from the wheel at the stern. Jess taught the brunette what to do and the pair of them cranked the two huge white sails up and the light August breeze took over for the motor. The teen went down below and cut the engine of the vessel. The boat was moving completely under the power of wind.
Alex sat down and steered the boat gently. Olivia and Jess joined her at the rear of the boat. The A.D.A. lifted up her right arm and the detective took her usual spot, back against the blonde, legs stretched out in front of her. Alex's right arm fell and draped over Olivia's right shoulder and down her body. The brunette always took the blonde's hand in hers and dovetailed their fingers. Today was no different. Jess took her usual position as well. She pinned herself between the back of the U shaped bench they were all sitting on and Olivia's out stretched legs. On her left side, Jess laid her head on the right side of Olivia's stomach and stretched her own legs out. Jess took her iPhone out of her shorts pocket, thumbed around and it started to play music softly. The young blonde reached up and set the phone on Olivia's chest. This garnered a giggle from both the brunette and the older blonde. "Please, make yourself at home." Olivia quipped.
Jess smiled widely but still did not look up. "Thanks." She stretched her right arm over the detective's body and held her left hand. The young woman played with the Claddagh ring she had given the detective several months earlier. Jess had also given Alex one. The pair had chosen to wear the rings on their ring fingers, with the crowns facing up. The teenager wiggled it off the detective's finger and placed it on her own thumb. She then held the detective tightly. "Don't mind if I do."
Those were the last words the older women heard from Jess for a long time. Olivia giggled again and with her left hand stroked Jess's soft curls. It took less than three minutes until Jess fell asleep.
The music from Jess's phone and the water lapping at the fiberglass hull of the boat while it cut through the water was calming. Alex had taken the phone off of Olivia and set it near the wheel that she was steering the boat with. Olivia closed her eyes and squeezed Alex's hand gently. "You know, you were right. I do like your sailboat."
Alex smiled and leaned into Olivia gently. "I thought you might. What's with Jess?"
Olivia craned her neck to look up at Alex. "I think our daughter fell asleep."
The blonde looked down at Olivia, a smile still on her face. "She called us a family."
The brunette smiled. "Yes, she did. We are a family, Alex." Olivia sighed and the smile disappeared from her face. "I have everything I've always wanted and I have fucked it up, Al."
Alex's featured softened from the smile to sympathy. "You did not fuck it up. We fucked it up, together. I know you feel guilty about your career but you shouldn't. I am just as guilty for working as many hours as you."
"Al, why can't it be easy? I waited for you for so long; I made so many promises to myself that if you came back to me I would do anything, give up anything. Why can't I?"
The blonde squeezed Olivia's hand gently. "Everybody makes deals with themselves, Liv, that does not mean that they are rational deals. The truth is, you could not give up what you do, it is too important to you. You need to work and raise Jess. I want to raise her with you, but we can't do it as a couple."
Olivia shook her head as she looked into the sky-blue eyes behind the black frames. "I'm so sorry, Al. I never meant it to be like this."
Alex looked into Olivia's dark brown eyes. "I'm sorry, too. I wish I could be the person who you need me to be, but I can't. I'm going to pack up my things at your place tonight."
Tears formed in the detective's eyes. "Will you stay tonight?"
The A.D.A. nodded her head. "Of course." Alex held Olivia tighter as both women turned and looked at the water ahead of them. They sat in silence and enjoyed the last bit of time they had together. Olivia re-played the last three months in her mind as Notion by Kings of Leon played on Jess's iPhone.
(I got a notion that says it doesn't feel right
Got the answer in your story today
You gave me a sign that didn't feel right
So don't knock it, don't knock it, you been here before
So don't knock it, don't knock it, you been here before)
Alex had been everything Olivia had asked her to be. It struck Olivia as odd that Alex had said she couldn't be who the detective needed her to be. The thought of coming home on Monday night after work to a bed without Alex in it made Olivia's heart ache.
(I just wanted to know if I could go home
Been rambling day after day
Everyone says they don't know
So don't knock it, don't knock it, you been there before
So don't knock it, don't knock it, you been there before
I got a notion that says it doesn't feel right
I just wanted to know if I could go home)
The A.D.A. also took the quiet time to reflect on the last few months. The truth was she wondered if she could go to a permanent home without Olivia and Jess.
Jess woke about an hour after she had fallen sleep. She nuzzled Olivia's belly and she felt the detective giggle slightly at the sensation. "Our daughter is awake."
The teenager laughed out loud and gently sat up to look at the two women. "'Our daughter'…I love it! How long have you been referring to me as that?"
Alex looked into Jess's deep green eyes. "What makes you think that wasn't the first time?"
A sly smile found its way across Jess's face. "It rolled off Livie's tongue too easily."
Olivia looked at Jess. "Please, don't be mad but we've been calling you that for two months now."
Jess's features softened and she smiled sweetly at the older women. "Why didn't you say it to my face?"
Alex looked from Jess to Olivia and back to the younger blonde. "We didn't want to scare you. Calling you that would be a big assumption on our part."
The young blonde hugged Olivia got up and walked over to the other side of Alex. Jess bent down lightly and kissed Alex on the left side of her neck, in the center of a pink scar. "It would have been a good assumption though."
Jess and Olivia eventually took the sails of the boat down and Alex anchored it. The women had lunch on the deck in the warm August sun. They had an incredible afternoon together. It was hard for Jess to tell that her family was about to be turned upside down. She cherished the afternoon with the other women and completely understood why they had not gone to the Stablers for dinner.
It took some time but Jess decided out of the two women in her presence, she was going to put the mini GPS device Morales had given her the day before on Olivia. It was nice of him to have owned up to his promise. Morales had installed the tracking program on Jess's laptop for her while she had been decoding the encrypted files on Ronald Blaze's computer. It would only be a matter of time before Alex moved out of Olivia's apartment. After that she would most likely be at her condo, office or at the courthouse. If Jess needed Alex it would be easy to locate her; plus she had an assistant. The detective, on the other hand, was a different story. Jess had the tiny device for another twenty-four hours; she planned to track Olivia on Monday to test the how well the GPS worked.
The teenager grabbed her iPhone and went below the deck, into the bathroom, closed the door and turned to the sink. She slipped a finger between the protective rubber case and the back of the phone. She pulled out the tiny silver disk and held it up to look at it. The young women wondered if it would work. Jess set the phone down on the side of the sink and placed the GPS disk on top of the phone. The blonde took off the detective's Claddagh ring she was still wearing and looked at the inside band, where the back of the heart and crown were. There was enough room there to adhere the device and they were roughly the same colour of silver. Jess sat the ring down on the phone and picked up the GPS disk with her right hand. She peeled the backing off the adhesive glue on the back of the disk and flicked the backing into the toilet. With her left hand the blonde picked up the ring and carefully set the disk on the inside of the ring. She squished it down with her thumb in order to make sure it was on securely. When she took her thumb away she examined the minuscule device; it was barely noticeable against the silver of the ring. Jess put it back on her right thumb and did not feel the disk against her skin; she hoped the detective wouldn't either. The young woman flushed the toilet and went back up to the deck of the boat to join Olivia and Alex. She slipped the ring back on Olivia's ring finger and hugged the brunette.
They docked the boat back in its slip in the early evening. The women went back to Olivia's place and made dinner together. It didn't take long but witty banter and music filled the kitchen. They laughed over the kitchen table as they ate dinner and found themselves in a dishtowel snapping fight initiated by Jess as they washed and dried the dishes.
Jess wound the towel she had in her hands tightly and snapped it against Olivia's backside. "You're it, Livie!"
Olivia's eyes went wide at the sting. She grabbed the lone towel left hanging on the handle of the oven, wound it and snapped it back at Jess, making contact with her right side. "Now you're it, kid!"
The younger blonde laughed, wound her towel and snapped it at Alex, who had a grin on her face. "You're it Ally!"
Alex wound the towel she had in her hands and looked at Olivia. "On three?"
The detective nodded. "One"
Alex's smile got wider but she never looked at Jess. "Two"
A sly smile found its way across Olivia's lips. "Three…"
Jess squealed, turned and ran out of the kitchen. Olivia followed right behind her into the living room. Alex tore into the living room as well but ran around the left side of the couch and to the far side of the coffee table. Jess vaulted over the couch and the detective followed her. "You better run, little girl!"
The teenager looked back at Olivia as she flew through the air, over the couch and landed on her feet. "Or what, Livie?!"
What Jess had failed to see was that she was running right into Alex's path. "Or I'll get you!" Alex grabbed at Jess's t-shirt but the kid ducked and evaded her. Jess ran down the hall and into Olivia's bedroom. The detective was three steps behind her and Alex two behind Olivia. The teenager took four large strides into the room and jumped onto the bed. The detective threw herself forward and grabbed Jess around the waist. Both women tumbled onto the bed, Olivia on her back and the young blonde on top of her. Jess squealed and laughed and tried her hardest to break free. Alex jumped on the bed and started to tickle Jess. The teen started to laugh harder and the other women broke out in laughter.
When all was said and done Alex spooned Olivia and Jess was lying on her side, curled up face first into Olivia. The kid's left arm was slung over the detective and was clutching the older blonde's shirt. The A.D.A. had her right arm over Olivia and the brunette's hand and hers were held together on Jess's back. The older women felt Jess's whimpering before they heard it.
Alex spread her fingers out across Olivia's and started to rub Jess's back with both their hands. "Shhhh….Jessie. I know it's hard."
"Don't go…" was all Jess could get out.
Olivia felt the older blonde's words catch in her throat before she spoke them. "I have to."
"No, you don't! You promised me, Ally!" Jess wailed.
The detective knew she had to step in. In Jess's eyes Alex leaving appeared to be all the A.D.A.'s decision and that was not true. "Jessie, Ally kept her promise as long as she could. This is not just Al's decision; we both feel it is what's best."
Jess knew she had to accept what was happening. At that very moment and after the day she had with her family she just did not have the strength. "Don't let me go…" The young woman wept bringing tears to the other women's eyes. They held on tight to each other until at some point Jess's sobbing subsided altogether. Alex and Olivia held their daughter until she had cried herself to sleep.
Eventually the A.D.A. and the detective unraveled themselves from the child and each other. Olivia sat on the edge of the bed and Alex stood up. She grabbed a pull suitcase out from under Olivia's bed and opened it on the floor. She went to the closet, opened it and started to pull her clothing off of hangers. Once Alex had an arm full she turned and walked over to the suitcase and placed the clothing in it. Olivia sighed. "I can't watch you do this."
With that the detective got up and walked out of the room. Alex watched the love of her life walk out of the bedroom and disappear down the hall. Tears formed in the A.D.A.'s eyes as her gaze shifted from the doorway to the bed. The tears that had formed in her sky blue eyes fell down her cheeks at the sight of the child on the bed, still curled up and completely unaware that she was all alone. Alex closed her eyes and cried; she was leaving everyone she loved behind.
Olivia turned off the music and finished putting the dishes away in the kitchen. She poured Alex a glass of white wine and grabbed herself a Corona from the fridge. The brunette set the beverages on the coffee table in the living room. She picked up a lighter off the coffee table and lit the candles that were around the room. The detective took a swig of her beer, set the bottle and the lighter back on the table and laid on her back on the couch; her head propped up on a pillow.
It did not take Alex long to pack. The suitcase was full, as was a garment back with suits and a duffle bag full of miscellaneous items. She stacked them behind the door of Olivia's room; she did not want Jess to see them when she woke up. Alex shut the lights off in the room and moved silently from the bedroom to the living room. Olivia had turned all the lights in the apartment off and it was now only illuminated by candlelight. The blonde found her detective lying on the couch. Alex picked up the glass of wine and took a mouth full; she set it back down, took off her glasses and set them on the table as well. She looked down at the brunette. "Hold me."
Olivia spread her legs apart more to make room for the slender blonde. Alex laid with her head on the detective's chest, their stomachs pressed together and her legs stretched out between Olivia's. The brunette put her arms around Alex and started to rub her back. Alex let her arms drop to Olivia's side. "I love you, Liv."
The detective inhaled the sweet scent of coconut from the silky blonde hair. "I love you too, Al."
When Jess woke up the room was dark. She looked at the clock on the bedside table; it read 2:37AM. It was only then she realized her room didn't have a clock on the bedside table. The young woman looked around and immediately recognized her surroundings; she also recalled that when she had fallen asleep there were two other people in the bed with her.
Jess got off the bed and padded barefoot out to the living room. She found the two women sound asleep on the couch; the candles were burning low in the room but most of them were still going. The kid looked at the women and wondered what on earth could have come between them. Jess did not have the heart to wake them; she did however have an idea. She quietly walked into her own room and turned on the light on the bedside table. She opened the drawer to the table and fished out the camera Dick had given her a few months earlier. The blonde switched it on and used her thumb to maneuver through the menus. She shut off the flash and changed the settings of the iris.
She silently padded back out to the living room and knelt down on her knees on the opposite side of the coffee table. Jess took several pictures of the women sleeping in the candlelight. She shut the camera off and watched Olivia and Alex in silence for a few minutes. There had to be a way to keep them together; they hadn't really been that forthcoming with reasons why they were breaking up. Both Olivia and Alex had said it had become hard to be together but Jess really did not understand that. To the teen, it didn't seem like a reasonable explanation for a break-up. In all honesty, the older women had let bits and pieces of their history slip to Jess over the last three months. Neither knew they other had done it, but they both had. As the teenager looked at the women she had grown so fond of she knew she had to get them to talk with each other about their past. It was the only way Jess could see them working out their issues.
The kid left the women on the couch and went to her own room. She placed the camera on her desk, peeled off her clothing and put on one of Olivia's oversized NYPD t-shirts as a nightshirt and crawled into bed. Jess turned off the light, laid her head on a pillow and fell asleep.
Olivia could not take it anymore. Her back was killing her. She had no idea what time it was but the candles had all died out. The detective ran her fingers down her A.D.A.'s back and up her spine. Alex stirred and nuzzled Olivia's chest. "Al, can we go to bed?"
Without opening her eyes Alex lazily said, "Jess is in our bed."
The brunette had forgotten about the sleeping child in her bed. Although she did not miss the fact that in Alex's sleepy state she had called her bed 'ours'. "We'll sleep in Jess's bed. I have to get off this couch."
"K" was all Alex could muster. She lifted herself off the detective and rose to her feet. It took Olivia a minute as her back was stiff but she followed suit. They quietly walked to Jess's room and walked across the threshold. Alex was almost to the bed before Olivia whispered to her, "Jess is in her own bed."
The A.D.A. was so sleepy she had not even noticed the child sleeping in the bed. "Oh…right." Alex turned and walked out of the bedroom with Olivia. She closed the door to Olivia's bedroom once they were inside. They stripped of their clothing and got into bed. Olivia laid on her side and Alex curled up behind her, spooning the detective. The women fell back asleep almost instantly.
Monday August 17th, 06:30
Jess woke up in a cold sweat; the images of the six little boys still in Markus Pharaoh's captivity fresh in her mind. The nightmares were not going away. She wondered if she should tell Dr. Hendrix about them in therapy today. Jess reached over and looked at her iPhone, it was time to get up.
Like every morning Jess grabbed the paper from outside the door, turned on music in the kitchen, sat down with a pencil and did the Sudoku. It was not until she heard the water in the shower turn on that she started making breakfast. When she heard the water she glanced at the clock on the stove, 7:45. Alex and Olivia had slept in and if Jess did not hurry she was going to be late for her session with Dr. Hendrix. The young woman got to work in the kitchen. When the older women appeared there was something going on between them, a kind of sadness for lack of a better term. They each went up to Jess and hugged and kissed her. Alex kissed Jess on the left side of her neck, on the pink scar left there by Brian Nudds. Breakfast was nice but both women only seemed to speak to Jess and not each other. The teenager found herself on edge because of Olivia's and Alex's strange behavior. Jess showered quickly, dressed, packed up her laptop and leftovers from dinner the night before for lunch that day. She noticed that it was eight-thirty in the morning and neither the detective nor the A.D.A. had moved from the kitchen. Something was definitely up. As she slipped her black and pink DC's on at the door, Jess looked at the women sitting in the kitchen. "What the hell is going on?"
Both women had been watching Jess fly around the apartment getting ready for her day. Olivia spoke first. "What do you mean?"
Jess narrowed her eyes at Olivia first and then Alex as she spoke. "You should both be at work by now and you are not speaking to each other. So I'll ask again, what the hell is going on?"
An uneasy smile formed on Alex's lips. "Nothing, we both called in late today to work. We'll be in by nine-thirty."
Jess looked at Olivia and she nodded back confirming what Alex had said. The young woman shook her head. "You're both lying! I was born at night but not last night! What they hell is wrong with you two?"
Both women sighed and looked at each other as if to say what the hell was wrong with us. Olivia looked at Jess. "Nothing is wrong. I want you to call El or me if you get an instant message from Pharaoh today. We'll drive down to your office and work out the details of a meet and greet if that's what he offers. Call us immediately."
The teen looked back at Olivia with a defeated look in her eyes. "Why do you think you have to lie to me?" Jess turned and opened the door.
As she walked through it Olivia called out to her. "Jess, you call me if you get that instant message! I'm not screwing arou…"
Jess walked through the doorway and slammed the door behind her, not waiting for the detective to finish her sentence or answering her. She closed her eyes and sighed at the closed door. Alex looked from the door to Olivia. "She'll call."
Olivia turned to Alex and opened her eyes. "I know she will. The next few weeks are going to be really hard on her."
Alex looked into Olivia's deep brown eyes and got lost. "She is going to act out, a lot."
The sky blue eyes staring at her mesmerized the detective. "You're going to her baseball game tonight with me right?"
The A.D.A. smiled slightly and nodded. "Yes. We should take her out to dinner after the game and I'll tell her then that I've moved out."
Tears came to Olivia's eyes. "You don't have to leave so soon. You could wait a few days."
Alex broke their eye contact and stared down at the plate in front of her. "I could wait a few months, Liv, but the truth is nothing will be different. The last thirty-six hours is the most we have seen each other in over four weeks. Even then, Jess was with us the whole time. It takes more than that to be a couple. I want you, Liv, I want time with you." Alex shook her head and looked at Olivia. "We both know it is not going to happen. Between our jobs and Jess there just isn't enough time for us."
Olivia knew it was true. Three months ago the brunette had never accounted for the fact that she and Alex would never see each other. It had been childish to overlook that fact, to think that it would all just work out. Olivia looked at Alex and nodded. "I umm…I can't watch you leave so I'm going to get my stuff and go work." The detective stood up, walked around the table and leaned down to the blonde's face. Olivia cupped Alex's face in her hands and kissed her. When the kiss ended she walked to her bedroom, collected her service weapon, badge and other items she needed for the day and walked out to the kitchen. Alex had cleared the dishes and was washing them in the sink. Olivia wanted to say so much, she wanted to plead with the A.D.A. to stay, but she knew Alex was right. Instead she just said, "I'll call you if we get anything on Pharaoh."
Alex turned and looked at Olivia. "Okay. Blaze has a bail hearing today at eleven. I'll let you know what happens."
The detective nodded, turned and opened the door. She closed it behind herself and headed for the elevator.
The blonde was left completely alone in the apartment she had basically been living in for the last three months. She finished the dishes and turned off the music in the kitchen. Alex slowly walked through the apartment and down to the bedroom she had shared with Olivia. She looked inside the room, taking stock of it and of her and Olivia. Alex had not been naive three months ago when she promised Jess that she would stay with Olivia. She had stayed as long as she could, but neither woman had been happy for a long time. Their relationship had become a constant stream of disappointments and cancelled engagements. It wasn't fair to either of them to continue the relationship; they both deserved more.
Alex grabbed her bags from behind the bedroom door and walked down the hallway, into the living room and to the front door. She dropped them onto the floor and went back down the hall. She stopped in front of Jess's room and walked in. Alex stood in the room and looked around. Tears formed in the blonde's eyes. Maybe things would have turned out differently between her and Olivia if Jess had not come into their lives. The thing was, Alex didn't want to know. She loved Jess in a way she had never loved anything else in her life. Alex walked over to Jess's bed and picked up one of the pillows. She inhaled the young woman's scent and knew instantly that she could not bear to lose the child she had grown so attached to. It was going to break Alex's heart to sit across a table from Jess later that day and tell her she was not coming home with her and Olivia.
Alex set the pillow back down and ran her fingertips over the comforter of the freshly made bed. She turned and walked out the door, down the hall and back to the door of the apartment. The blonde picked up her bags, opened the door and closed it behind herself. She locked it and headed for the elevator.
Manhattan's SVU Squad Room
Monday August 17th, 09:34
Olivia walked into the bullpen and sat down at her desk. Fin and Munch were out on a new call that came in that morning. Stabler and Benson were supposed to be catching any new cases but without his better half, Elliot had given up the call to Munch and Fin. Cragen was out at a meeting, which left only the partners in the squad room.
As soon as Olivia sat down Elliot knew something was up. He had looked up from his paperwork but had not said anything to her. Olivia sat in her chair and stared into nothingness on the other side of the room. "She packed her stuff last night. Alex moved out this morning after Jess left."
Elliot cleared his throat. "The two of you can't work this out?"
The brunette continued to look blankly across the room. "Nope. We both work upwards of fifty-five hours a week. Between making sure Jess is always with someone and trying to keep our jobs there is no time for each other."
Stabler sighed. "I told you I would help you two with Jess. You and Cabot have to loosen the stranglehold you have on her. Eventually Jess is going to rebel against both of you."
Benson was surprised at her partner's willingness to leave Jess alone. He didn't see her everyday. How could Elliot truly know how Jess felt or how she would act? Olivia finally looked at him. "You know, you act like you know Jess better than I do."
Elliot squinted his eyes slightly at his partner. "That's not what I meant and you know it." His eyes went sympathetic. "Look, Liv, I have five kids, three of which are girls and all three have been or are teenagers. There is a honeymoon phase with you, Cabot and Jess but eventually she will push her limits with you both. She is going to want her own space and more freedom. If you gave her those things now it might save your relationship with Alex."
Olivia was beyond rationalization at this point. Her life was falling apart around her and the one person that was supposed to be there for her was acting as though it would be so easy to fix everything. "You know, Elliot, you have no idea what it is like to raise Jess. You have no idea what it has taken Alex and me to get this far with her. Do you know how she fell asleep last night?"
Her partner looked at her in silence. "She fell asleep in mine and Alex's arms. Do you know what she was doing as she was falling sleep?"
The detective looked back at her with his blue eyes and quietly said, "No."
Benson shook her head slightly. "Jess was crying. Alex and I held her until she cried herself to sleep. Does that sound like a child that should be left alone? Does that sound like a teenager that is going to rebel?"
Stabler looked down at the paperwork on his desk and then back at Olivia. "Okay, no. No it doesn't. You're right Liv I don't know Jess or Alex very well but I do know you. You need Alex; you love her."
The brunette nodded. "You're right, you don't know Jess. Please stay out of my relationship with my daughter."
Elliot's eyebrows practically crawled off his face in shock. It was the first time he had ever heard his partner use that term to describe Jess. Olivia saw the look on his face and realized what she had said. She narrowed her eyes at him. "Save it, El."
The detective sighed. He was never going to get Olivia to see reason right now. Her world was spiraling out of control and he knew it. Although he did not know Jess very well he did know teenaged daughters well. It was only a matter of time before Jess pushed the limits with Olivia and Alex with regards to her own space. Elliot also had his suspicions that Jess was far stronger than his partner and the A.D.A. gave her credit for. "Morales is going to call us if he and Jess hear anything from Pharaoh on Ronald Blaze's computer today."
Olivia glanced over at the stack of paperwork on her desk. She picked up half the pile and started to sift through it. "Good. The arraignment for Blaze is at eleven, Cabot is going to let us know if he gets remand."
With that the partners went on with their workday. The discussion about Olivia's life was over…for now.
60 Centre Street
Supreme Court
Courtroom of Judge Lena Petrovsky
Arraignment of Ronald Blaze
Monday August 17th, 11:00
The judge's assistant called out the case. "Docket ending nine three five seven, the people verses Ronald Blaze. Charges are production and distribution of child pornography"
Judge Petrovsky looked at Ronald Blaze and his attorney. "How do you plead Mr. Blaze?"
Blaze looked at the judge. "Not guilty."
The judge looked at Alex. "What are the people looking for in terms of bail?"
Alex looked at Petrovsky. "The people request remand, your honor." The A.D.A. cut her eyes to Blaze. "The defendant build a child pornography website and maintained its security in order to evade the New York Police department in taking it down."
Blaze's attorney shot a look at Alex. "You have to be kidding me with remand." He then looked at the judge. "Your honor, this is outrageous. The people's case is weak, at best."
"Weak at best?" Alex scoffed as she looked from Blaze's attorney to the judge. "Your honor, we have ironclad evidence from one of Ronald Blaze's external hard drives that demonstrates every key stroke he hit in order to build the website. We have him dead to rights on the production and distribution charges. The people feel Ronald Blaze is a threat to society…"
The attorney looked from the judge to the A.D.A. "A threat to society?!" He looked back at Petrovsky. "Your honor, please tell A.D.A. Cabot to keep the theatrics to herself. Ronald Blaze is a computer programmer by trade. He has an apartment in Chelsea and is not a threat whatsoever to society."
"A computer programmer by trade? Your client has not worked in over a year. How does he afford that apartment in Chelsea on unemployment insurance?" Alex turned her attention to Petrovsky. "The people believe Ronald Blaze knows the whereabouts of the six young victims that are being tortured on the website."
Blaze attorney lost it. "Your honor, I strenuously object! It is obvious that A.D.A. Cabot is out to slander my client with false accusations. The people have not charged Ronald Blaze with anything other than production and distribution of child pornography. If they had evidence of other crimes they have to charge him with them before disparaging him in a court of law."
Judge Petrovsky held up her hands, palms up halting all arguments. "Enough…from everyone! A.D.A. Cabot I warned you about biting off more than you could chew in this case. Unless you have evidence that Mr. Blaze knows where your victims are you must limit your comments to the charges you have charged him with. Now Mr. Blaze, I find what is on that website repulsive. I have to agree with A.D.A. Cabot about bail. While remand is harsh it is not without merit. Ronald Blaze is remanded without bail. Jury selection will start on Tuesday August 18th at nine AM. I want your witness lists that morning as well. I will hear opening arguments on this case starting Wednesday morning." Petrovsky smacked her gavel down and called for the next case.
One Police Plaza
Computer Crimes
Monday August 17th, 11:15
Jess was listening to music on her iPhone while she was running some analyses on her laptop for Morales. She was sitting beside Blaze's computer, which was running. Morales was decoding a hard drive seized as evidence yesterday in another case, in the background he had the child pornography website running. If another video was posted he wanted to take it down in an attempt to show Pharaoh he needed help maintaining the site. Morales checked the website and a video had been posted twenty minutes ago. It was of Evan Winthrop and two other victims, Quentin Stevenson and Trey Kingston.
Morales stood up and walked over to Blaze's computer. Jess stopped what she was doing and pulled out the one ear bud she had in. "What's up?"
Her superior looked down at her. "New video on the website."
The teenager's gaze went from Morales to Blaze's computer. "Can I take it down using Blaze's computer?"
"I can do it. You really don't have to do everything for this case. There is no way I could have decoded those files but I can take down the video."
Jess smiled and looked up at Morales. "I know you could do it. I just want to see this through to the end." She shrugged. "You can do it though."
Morales smiled back at Jess. "You worked your ass off for this case. You should be the one that toys with Pharaoh. Go ahead."
The blonde's smile faded as she turned to the computer monitor. She grabbed the mouse, opened up a window on the Internet and went to the website. The young woman clicked on the newest video and then turned to the keyboard to follow through on making it disappear. It did not take long and the video was gone. Jess sat back in her chair and looked up at Morales. "How long do you think it will take for Pharaoh to notice the website has been screwed with?"
The tech looked down at his protégé. "Probably not very long; he will be monitoring the website closely given that Ronald Blaze has been arrested."
Jess furrowed her brow. "Do you think we should call Livie and El? I mean it would make sense as there is a high probability that Pharaoh will contact us. They should be here right?"
Morales nodded. "Good call. You wanna take that one too?"
A chuckle came from the young woman. "Yeah sure." She grabbed her phone, disconnected the ear buds and thumbed her way to Olivia's number. When the detective answered Jess explained what she had done and asked the brunette if she and Elliot wanted to make their way to One P.P. since it was highly probable Pharaoh would contact them soon. Olivia agreed it was a smart idea and they would be there soon and disconnected.
When Elliot got back from the bathroom Olivia relayed the conversation she had just had with Jess. Stabler drove the sedan from the motor pool of the one-six to One Police Plaza, his partner was in no state to drive. The ride had been silent for the seventeen minutes they had been driving so far, Elliot had glanced at the clock on the dash every minute or so. He hit a red light, stopped the car and glanced over at his partner. "Liv…I am sorry about you and Alex."
Olivia looked at him with a genuine look in her eyes and sighed. "I know you are." Her cell phone went off on her hip.
"I don't know what this is
But you got me good
Just like you knew you would
I don't know what you do
But you do it well
I'm under your spell
You got me begging you for mercy"
The detective was not sure how to answer the phone. She sat there looking at the caller ID. Though she didn't need to look at it; Jess had given Alex that ringtone three months earlier. Normally when the A.D.A. called Olivia would answer with Al or sweetie, always something loving if only Elliot was around. It was hard to know what to say now. She flipped the phone open and tried to sound as normal as possible. "Hey you, what's up?"
Alex was surprised to hear Olivia's greeting, although she shouldn't have been. It actually threw the A.D.A. off. The blonde was going to have to get use to her detective referring to her as Alex or something more generic. She was also going to have to stop thinking of Olivia as hers. "Uhh…hey you." A rough start Alex thought to herself. "I just wanted to let you…I mean the squad know that Ronald Blaze is being held in remand."
A smile formed on the detective's face. "Al, that's great news. We are actually on our way to One P.P. Pharaoh posted a new video this morning and Jess and Morales took it off the site. They are hoping it will make Pharaoh contact them faster."
The A.D.A.'s heart skipped a beat. Olivia had called her Al. It shouldn't have meant that much to Alex but it did. "Thanks, Liv. I would imagine it wouldn't take long for Blaze to somehow get word to Pharaoh that he will not be getting out of jail. That alone should make Pharaoh contact Blaze's computer."
Olivia could hear her heart pounding in her chest. Hearing Alex call her Liv was bittersweet. "You're probably right. Listen if we get anything on a meet and greet I'll call you."
Alex was nervous. It was a very unnatural way for the blonde to feel on the phone with the detective. "Thanks, Liv. I am about to go into court for a pre-trial hearing. Leave a message on my cell and I'll call when I get out."
The detective nodded but said nothing. It was the second time Alex had called her Liv. It felt so good and yet broke Olivia's heart. The A.D.A.'s voice snapped her out of her own thoughts. "Liv?"
"Oh, yeah sorry. Elliot's driving…you know how that is. I'll call you. Good luck with your pre-trial stuff." Olivia knew it was lame but she did not know what else to say.
"Okay, thanks. Bye Liv."
"Bye Al."
Elliot had been listening the entire time he was driving. He was still in denial that his partner and the A.D.A. were actually broken up. They might be separating for now, but they were still sweet on each other and there was no denying that. It was also painfully awkward to see them struggle through what they were. "So…what did Al have to say for herself?"
Olivia slid her partner a sly look. "She got Blaze held without bail for a start."
Stabler stopped the car at the last red light before they hit the parking garage at One Police Plaza. He glanced at his partner and caught the look she was giving him. "Good for her and us. What else did she say?'"
"She wants me to call her if we set up a meet and greet with Pharaoh."
"And…?"
Olivia rolled her eyes. "She called me Liv."
He shot Olivia a sly look back with a grin on his face.
"You know you're lame right? I mean really, truly, unbelievable lame."
Benson shook her head and grinned at Elliot. "Why can't you ever let anything slip by? You are an asshole. You know that right?"
Elliot's grin got wider and he nodded slightly. "How could I not, you tell me every chance you get."
Olivia laughed out loud.
Elliot looked back at the road and stepped on the gas as the traffic light turned green.
11:57
The detectives walked through the office door just in time. Morales waved them over as Jess was typing. Stabler nodded his head to Morales as a greeting and Benson did the same. As the partners came around Jess's desk Elliot looked at the older tech. "What's going on?"
Morales looked at him. "The person we suspect is Pharaoh just sent Blaze's computer an instant message."
Olivia looked down at the text box and read what it said out loud. "Put my video back."
Jess looked up at Olivia, who was standing immediately to the child's right side. "Should I put it back?"
The detectives looked at each other and shrugged. Jess and Morales watched the exchange. "I'll put it back up on the website" The blonde had seen enough of the partner's exchanges to know that was a unanimous sure why not. Using the mouse Jess clicked on a minimized item at the bottom of the screen. The website popped up. With some very deliberate keystrokes on the keyboard the missing video was returned to its original location on the site. Jess looked up at Olivia. "Can I talk to Pharaoh?"
Olivia answered more as a mother than a detective; a fact that did not go unnoticed by Elliot. She had not even looked at him to consult him. "I would prefer to talk to him. You do not need to be involved in communicating with him."
Jess squinted her eyes at Olivia. "I got us this far. What difference does it make if I type to him?"
Benson narrowed her eyes back to Jess. "It makes a difference, Jess. Move, I'll type."
The teen raised her right eyebrow. "Seriously? Livie, what difference could it possible make? He can't even see us."
Olivia furred her brow. "It makes a difference to me. I am your mo…" The detective's eyebrows practically shot up off her face and her jaw dropped in shock. She could not believe what she had almost said. The almost statement took Jess by surprise as well. The anger in the teen's face softened and she stood up. Although it had come out in anger, well actually more in an act of protection if Jess was really being honest, Olivia had demonstrated an almost primal act of motherhood. She did not want her child to be involved in such ugliness. The right side of Jess's mouth tugged up in a grin. "Okay, you win. Sit…type."
The brunette did as instructed, looked at the text box on the monitor and then up at Jess. "What should I type?"
The grin disappeared from Jess's face. "Type 'It's back. U need me.'"
Morales and Stabler exchanged looks. They both raised their brows and shrugged. They might as well have gone for lunch. The men looked back at the women and the monitor as Olivia typed what Jess had said and sent the message. Pharaoh must have been waiting for the reply because his response was almost instantaneous. "You have made your point. Who are you?"
Benson looked up at her partner. "He's going for it. How do we want to play this?"
Stabler looked surprised she was even consulting him. "Meeting in a public place, of his choice; we want him to be comfortable. Leave out a name and description of whom he will be meeting. Ask him to describe himself so you can find him."
The brunette turned back to the computer and typed out a message relaying the questions. A response came quickly. "Two o'clock. Washington Square Park at the chess tables in the Southwest corner of the park. I will find you. Wear a black baseball hat." The four people in the office stared blankly at the monitor. Olivia could not believe it. "We got him."