julliette:I'm glad you enjoyed the scavenger hunt. It was something I was a bit wary of doing, seeing as how I thought it might drag on forever. XD
beginningxofxthexend:I swiped the Anonymous Speech and Anonymous Vow from UrbanDictionary, but the rest was all me. And I felt the need to do a little Chase/Caleb action there. I thought it fit in nicely and I thought the little scavenger hunt was a nice little thing to do, something utterly frustration and entirely Chase. XD
Ladyv.2102: Thanks for the glowing review and thanks beyond words for getting my story out there. I really, really appreciate the publicity. :3 And as for being a self-basher: I'm my own worst critic. I mean, I know it sounds horrifically cliche, but it's the truth. I feel like it's my job to point out the faults with my story so no one else is burdened with it. XD
xxFuturistico: I understand the whole being grounded thing. I'm totally not supposed to be updating this right now. I have another chapter I have to do to finish up my American Government class and I don't wanna! XD I walked around with "Bird and the Worm" stuck in my head for three days before I sat down and put it into a story, lol. I had a friend of mine that used to tell me all the time in class that if I didn't lighten up, I'd end up just like Grandma Death from the Donnie Darko movie, so I know what you mean about ranting. :D
He sat at the edge of a bar in another town with a name he didn't much care to know. He sipped at his drink and took a drag from his cigarette. He sent a calculating glance around the bar and decided there was no one worth checking out. He knew it would only be a matter of time before he ran out of places to go or his funds were shut off again and he'd have no choice but to go back home. Back to Massachusetts. Back to his abusive mother and his father's grave. Back to the "brothers" that had encouraged him to leave and not come back. Back to the only person that cared if he left... Back to the reason he had to go.
"You want another drink while you sit there and try to have a staring contest with that drink coaster?" The bartender asked, a slight smile on her face.
"Yeah. Sorry to creep you out."
"I've seen stranger things than an upset blond staring down a coaster." She laughed.
Reid forced a smile of his own and watched the red-head make him another drink, not thinking about the girl, but thinking about how he'd have to go home eventually. He pulled his wallet out of his back pocket and opened it. He cringed when he looked inside. He had enough money for his drinks, his hotel, his breakfast in the morning, and food and gas for the long drive east... He'd been hoping to squeeze another two weeks out of his cash, but it looks like his drinking habit finally caught up with him...
It was early when Reid rolled out of bed and he was semi-hungover. He climbed into his red '67 Mustang, his most beloved possession, and headed down to first a convenience store and then some rinky-dink little diner. He had aspirin and a stack of blueberry waffles for breakfast before he climbed into his car and rested his head against the steering wheel. He started the car's engine and plugged his iPod into the stereo system. He pushed play on the iPod and pulled out of the parking lot.
He spent most of his time just staring out the windshield and thinking about what his homecoming would be like. He eventually got bored and set the iPod to shuffle, boredly absent-mindedly singing along with the lyrics. It was when he stopped at a rest stop for some vending machine snacks and a hot cup of cheap coffee that his thoughts turned serious...
What would he say when he saw those blue eyes again? How could he possibly hope to react to that? What was he going to do? Reid pushed the thoughts back, climbed into his car and sipped at his slightly burnt coffee. The only one out of the whole group that gave a damn when he drove off six months ago, when he'd pulled several thousand dollars out of his bank account and drove off with a suitcase in the back of his car and his wallet a few inches thicker.
Reid growled lowly, put the coffee cup in the cup holder, slammed the car into reverse and pulled out of the parking space. He had a very, very long drive ahead of him. Possibly two days if he followed the speed limit and stopped to sleep. But that was something Reid always admired about himself, his ability to stay awake through sheer willpower. And caffeine. He smiled to himself and switched the song again, turned the volume up and drove, trying to keep his mind away from what was waiting for him in Ipswich.
Unfortunately, it didn't work for very long. His thoughts turned again to those blue eyes, the eyes that never judged him, not even when he left... He changed the song to something louder and angrier and he drove faster. He was doing almost 90 and he didn't care. He just had to go home, stay there long enough to smooth things over with his mother, pull a little bit more money out, and drive straight through to California. Maybe not go back to Ipswich. Pull out enough cash to get some flat with a nice view and sell his artwork to make the rent and utility bills. Live painting to painting... Certainly sounded more entertaining than living a lavishly extravagant lifestyle... To keep his mind from returning to the blue-eyed boy waiting in Ipswich, he wondered what it would be like to live on the beach in California... Maybe Santa Monica... Who was he kidding? It didn't matter where he was in California. It beat the hell out of Massachusetts...
He stopped later that afternoon for some food. He chose to listen to the conversations of others instead of being left alone with his thoughts again. There was a young couple behind him that was arguing over whether their wedding invitations should be ivory or bone colored. There was an elderly couple not far off that were trying to decide if they wanted to play Bridge with Maggie and Allan or if they wanted to play Gin-Rummy with Elanore and James. But, seeing as how he'd spent the last month living alone with his thoughts, they inevitably turned inwards. He wondered if he'd ever have to argue about wedding invitations or worry about playing Bridge or Gin-Rummy... Though he hoped that if he ever go that old, Halo would still be an option. He chuckled to himself and drank his coffee. He had a feeling he was going to be very well caffinated by the time he reached Massachusetts. Not that it mattered. He'd suck up to Mommie-dearest and be done with the whole thing within a week or two. And then he'd be gone again. Nothing but a suitcase of clothing, a wallet full of cash, his Mustang and his music...
Doing 90 makes time seem to speed up, Reid noticed. He flew by off-ramp signs trying to lead him to Boston before he'd been on the road for too long. He looked at his dashboard clock and did the math. Eighteen hours on the road. That wasn't so bad... Well, it wasn't, but it was. He had a few more hours and then he'd have to face his mother and everyone else...
He was in town and at a stoplight when he saw familiar sea-colored eyes looking at his car from the sidewalk. Great. He wasn't ready to be found out yet and, just like his luck always was, there was Tyler to throw a wrench in things. It was eleven at night. Everyone should be home in bed. But noooooo. Tyler had to be walking home from the bookstore where he spent nearly every waking moment. The brunette started to slowly walk closer to the car. The light changed and Reid flew onward, trying like hell to get away from the other teen. He glanced in his rearview mirror and saw Tyler pulling his phone out of his pocket. Reid groaned inwardly. It would be a small matter of time before the others knew he was in town again. And then what?
"I didn't think you'd come home this time."
Reid sighed and walked by the living room without a word. He climbed the stairs and headed to his room, tossing his suitcase onto his bed.
"I ran out of cash sooner than expected." Reid said as he went back down the stairs.
"Did you drink it all like your father loved to do?" His mother asked bitterly.
"No. I didn't. I spent most of it on gallery fees." Reid huffed indignantly.
"I'm sure you did. You know, that's why I fell in love with your father, because he was an artist." His mother said softly.
"You've told me. Look, I'm gonna just go up to my room and catch a little sleep. I haven't slept since yesterday. I drove all night." Reid said quickly.
"Right, right. Although Caleb called me and asked if you were really back. He said they were on their way over."
"Why didn't you tell them I was still gone?" Reid demanded.
"Caleb said Tyler saw you on the street."
"Goddamnit, Mom! Just once! Agh! How am I going to.... Fuck!" Reid ran his hands through his hair and tugged at his blond locks.
"You're going to have to face him some time. Why not now? While you're here and before you have time to go to the bank and get enough money to duck out again."
"You don't know what you're doing."
"I know exactly what I'm doing."
"You promised you wouldn't play matchmaker."
"I'm not. You know you love him. He knows he loves you. You know you love eachother. But for the life of me, I can't figure why you keep leaving him behind."
"It's because of them, Mother! I told you years ago that I'd be gone the first chance I got."
"Now you need to take a chance of a different kind."
There was a knock at the door before Reid could retort again.
"I won't answer and let them in." Reid said coldly.
His mother rose from her chair and opened the door. And there they were, in his living room. Caleb and Tyler and Pogue and Chase.
"We weren't expecting you back for... Well, ever." Caleb said darkly.
"I like to be unpredictable." Reid said with a cool tone.
"Yeah, just keep pretending you're the innocent one." Tyler huffed.
"I am the innocent one. I'm not the one that told everyone about my problems!" Reid yelled.
"No one told everyone. One person found out--" Pogue started.
"One person was enough! You know how this town likes to talk. You all know. And you fucking did it anyway." Reid's tone was venemous.
"We didn't know word would get out that you were in the Ward." Caleb said calmly.
"Fuck you, Caleb. You knew what would happen the second you told that bitch Sarah. Who went and told Kate. Who had to check with Pogue to see if it was true. Who would never lie to his girlfriend. So Kate went and had to cry about how everything was falling apart to Megan. Who just so happens to sit near Kyra who would never think twice to tell Aaron who told the whole goddamn town!" Reid yelled.
His brothers remained silent.
"That's what I thought. Do you have any idea what it's like to walk through town with people whispering that you're that kid? The one who got sent to the psych ward? You've got no idea what the hell you did to me. None." Reid hissed.
"You never gave us a chance to apologize before you left." Tyler spoke up.
"There never should have been anything to apologize about!" Reid screamed.
There was another moment of silence between them.
"I want you to leave." Reid growled.
Caleb, Tyler and Pogue turned away and approached the door.
"Come on Chase." Caleb said as he opened the door.
"Reid and I have unifinished business." Chase said slowly.
"He told us to leave, Chase. You don't want to be rude, do you?" Tyler asked.
"If he throws me out, he throws me out. I'm the only person I can blame. I'll catch up to you guys later." Chase never took his eyes off of Reid.
"Chase..." Caleb started.
"Why don't you boys walk me out to my car? I have a few things I need to pick up since Reid's back home." Mrs. Garwin smiled.
Caleb, Pogue and Tyler walked out the door with Reid's mother close behind.
"I tried to keep it quiet, where you were. I tried telling them to just shut up and not worry about where you were. They said nothing would come of it, that it was just pillow-talk." Chase said quietly.
"Which is why I'm not tossing you out on your ass right now." Reid growled.
"Look, just don't run off in the dead of night again, Reid. I... I can't keep hoping you're going to come back so I can see you but praying that you won't so you don't have to face the humiliation..."
Reid flopped down onto the couch and Chase slowly approached. He felt like he was trying to catch a rabbit, like he had to move slow or Reid would just bolt and he'd never see the boy again.
"I won't be coming back this time." Reid said softly.
Chase sank down on the couch next to Reid.
"Where will you go?"
"I was thinking California. Some place warm... No more snow." Reid smiled.
"Why so far?"
"Because I won't have to bother with people thinking I'm a psychopath." Reid's smile evaporated and his eyes went cold.
"You're not a psychopath. I know that. The others know that."
"But the rest of Ipswich thinks I'm a chainsaw murderer. Christ, I'm bipolar! One of the most common psychological disorders and people freak out."
"I know I freaked out." Chase said.
"What?"
"When I called that night to see if you were okay and your mom answered the phone crying and said she had to send you away, I had a panic attack." Chase smiled gently.
"Why?"
"Because she told me you just freaked out. She said you went from being okay to being pissed off to being depressed. She said you threatened to hurt yourself. I tried to see you in the Ward, but they wouldn't let me in. They said you were sedated and couldn't have visitors." Chase's smile was forced.
"They never told me you tried to see me."
"Every day for almost two weeks. Then I just gave up. Tried coming in on the weekends. They said they were still keeping you on suicide watch and wouldn't let me in. They thought I might set you off and you'd actually find a way to kill yourself."
"No shit?"
"I wouldn't lie to you."
Reid said nothing. He stared at a point on the hideous rug his mother picked out years ago and thought. Three months out on your own tended to make you sit alone with your thoughts more often...
"I'm going to take a few grand from the account this weekend and leave for good. I won't live in Ipswich anymore." Reid finally said.
"So you're just going to run off again and not come back?"
"I'll come back for vacations and to see Mom. But I won't live in Massachusetts again. It's not worth it to me."
"I'm not worth it to you." Chase growled, standing up quickly.
"I never said that."
"No, but you're making it pretty damn clear that's how you feel."
"Will you just sit the fuck down and hear me out!" Reid yelled.
"Why? So you can break up with me before you give me a chance?"
"So I can tell you I want you to come with me!"
The anger in the air drained away.
"What?"
"Pack up your stuff and let's get out of here this weekend. A suitcase full of clothes, that's all you'll need. And once we find a place out there, we come back, pack everything up, and have a moving company drag it out to Cali for us." Reid smiled.
Chase didn't say anything. He turned away from Reid and thought for a few long minutes.
"You want me to just pick up and drive off into the sunset with you and your Mustang?" Chase asked.
"It's not such a bad life." Reid shrugged.
Chase didn't say anything for a long moment, and then, "All I need is a suitcase?"
Reid smiled, stood up and threw his arms around Chase. He kissed the older boy's cheek.
"I'm still upset that you left without telling me goodbye." Chase smirked as he pried Reid's arms from around him.
"How are you still upset about that? I told you why I had to leave!"
"You still owe me." Chase smirked.
"Owe you what? A personalized apology?"
Chase slammed Reid against the wall and ghosted his lips across Reid's neck.
"So that's what I owe you, is it?" Reid asked.
"Did you talk him into staying?" Caleb asked Chase the next morning.
"Nothing could convince him to stay." Chase shrugged.
"Any idea when he's leaving again?" Tyler asked.
"He wouldn't tell me. All he said was that he was headed south. Probably either Florida or Louisiana. He told me he couldn't make up his mind which state, but he knew he wanted to get away from the snow." Chase replied.
"So you have no idea what's going on?" Pogue asked.
"All he kept saying was how upset he was that you guys sold him out." Chase shrugged again. He was glad he was a good liar. That wasn't what Reid had said so often last night. What had really been said was, "Oh, my God, Chase... Oh, God, yes... Oh, oh, fuck... Oh, Chase..." The memory brought a smile to Chase's lips and he quickly pushed it away.
A week later, Caleb was pissed to find Reid had left again and Chase wouldn't answer his phone. He was more than pissed when Chase's mother was sitting in the kitchen of the Garwin Manor talking about how adorable it was the Chase and Reid had gone away together.
Two weeks after that, Chase and Reid returned with big grins and stories of sun-soaked beaches and a flat they'd found with a gorgeous view. Caleb was upset that Chase had been so irresponsible as to run away with Reid without so much as a "goodbye". Chase told him to sit and spin. They quietly spent their spare time packing up their belongings and one day just... left again. This time with a mass text message saying "Cali, here we come... Again." so no one could complain about the lack of goodbyes.
"Do you think they hate us?" Chase asked over the roar of the Mustang's engine and the scream of the song Reid had playing.
"Who cares? We have a new flat to christen." Reid grinned.
Chase laughed and Reid was glad he'd confronted those blue eyes while he was back in Massachusetts...