A Small Comfort

Elissa was sitting on the ground with her hound. The giant mabari sat next to her, straight and attentive, as she leaned against him for support. They sat next to the bonfire as it illuminated the area around them. The night at Ostagar was so dark that Elissa could not even see the stars. It made her feel as if it were a bad omen.

Nothing Duncan could have said would have prepared her for what had happened. The mission to retrieve the darkspawn blood was unpleasant enough, but to find out it was so they had to drink it as part of their ritual…

She shuddered as she thought of Daveth and Jory. She saw many people die at Highever several nights ago, but she was still not accustomed to seeing it. She buried her face into the mabari's shaggy neck.

"Hey, you."

Elissa looked up to see Alistair standing in front of her. She gave him a small broken smile. As he sat heavily next to her, the mabari let out a low growl of warning. "Whoa…easy boy. Good boy. I'm not going to hurt her, see?" Alistair raised both his hands to show he was unarmed.

Elissa smiled at Alistair's nervousness. "Don't worry, he won't hurt you. He's just all bluster."

Alistair still kept his hands up as the hound continued to growl. "I can see that. What's his name anyway?"

"Dog."

"Dog? That's a bit obvious of a name, don't you think?" Alistair replied, eyeing the animal.

"I didn't have a name for him at first when he imprinted on me. After time went on, everyone kept referring to him as 'Dog', so it stuck." Elissa kissed her hound on the nose and he let out a soft whine. "I think it's a fine name."

Alistair laughed and shook his head. After several more seconds of quiet, he broke the silence. "I'm sorry…I couldn't warn you about all this." Alistair apologized.

Elissa shook her head and continued to hug her hound. "No, it's fine. I knew it was going to be bad since Duncan was being so secretive about it."

They both quietly watched the soldiers walking by the warden campsite in hurried paces. It seems the King wanted to start the battle as soon as he could. Elissa could already see a bit of panic in everyone's faces.

"How are you feeling?" Alistair asked, turning to her. "I remember I had awful nightmares when I first took part of the joining."

"To be honest, I don't remember anything since passing out. It just feels odd at the moment." Elissa rubbed at her forehead. "It's an odd sensation…like you feel like there's an extra set of eyes on you."

Alistair nodded in understanding. "Yes, that's a pretty good description. Don't worry. I'm sure you will get used to it soon."

Elissa nodded and continued to scratch her hound lightly behind the ears. Even though they sat in silence, she felt comfortable around Alistair. It was as if they were almost children again.

"Elissa…" Alistair murmured. "I heard what had happened to your home and your family. I'm so sorry."

She felt the tears rim in her eyes but refused to let them out. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "It's okay, Alistair. Bad things happen. It's a part of life."

Alistair gazed at her while she tried not to let her sadness show on her face. "You know, you've changed since then."

"What do you mean?" Elissa glanced at him.

"Back then, you were quite the troublesome child. So emotional over everything." Alistair laughed.

Elissa scoffed. "You've changed yourself. The Alistair I knew was always a mopey little child. I am not used to an Alistair that has a sense of humor."

He chuckled in response. "Well, that is what I promised to you."

"Promised to me?" Elissa lifted her head.

"You don't remember? You smacked me on the face and ordered me to be less broody. I recall it quite well, I had a red handprint on my face for days." He pointed to his left cheek.

Elissa couldn't help letting out a small laugh. "I can't believe you remember that. I'm quite touched."

Alistair leaned back on his hands like he used to when they were children. "Well, you are quite difficult to forget." He turned to look at her with a gentle expression. "Those days with you were some of the fondest times I can remember from my childhood. I can't thank you enough for it."

Elissa lowered her eyes and felt herself blush. "I'm happy that you remembered all that. I figured it didn't mean as much to you as it did me. I wrote several correspondences to Redcliffe but I never received a reply back."

"Yes, well…after the Couslands left Redcliffe, I was sent to the Chantry a month later." Alistair sighed.

Elissa nodded. It was what she had figured all along. "Duncan told me a bit about you. He said you were unhappy there."

"Ugh, unhappy is the nice word for it." Alistair groaned. "I was miserable there. Everyone was always telling me what to do and how to act. No one had any sense of humor. It was like living in a place with a bunch of Lady Isoldes…only they were mostly all men and well armed."

Elissa pictured what he had just said and laughed. "Well…I guess it's right to say that Duncan rescued you, correct?"

Alistair nodded and leaned forward. "I will be forever grateful towards Duncan for what he has done for me. These six months serving as a Grey Warden at his side have been the best in my life."

Elissa punched him lightly on the side. "Hey, I thought you said the days with me at Redcliffe were the best in your life!"

Alistair grinned. "Well, of course! It was quite fun back then, wasn't it? You were always depending on me for something!"

"What can I say? The Alistair back then was such a serious little boy back then. It was quite a challenge to break you out of your shell. I couldn't help to bask in your indulgence when I succeeded." Elissa grinned back.

Alistair pat his shoulder. "I'm still the same Alistair. Do you need someone to lean on? I am feeling a bit sorry for your hound to support your weight this whole time."

"Are you calling me heavy?" Elissa raised an eyebrow.

"Ah…er…no!" Alistair got flustered and waved his hands at her. "I…uh…blast it, you could tell I've been raised in a Chantry, I still can't speak to women to save my life."

Elissa laughed and nudged him. "I was teasing, Alistair." She smiled at his muddled behavior. "What you could have said was something clever like…'it's a bit chilly over here, want to lean on me and help me warm up?'"

"Ha…you're still instructing me on how I should act. Just like old times." Alistair quietly chuckled and patted his shoulder again. "Well then, Elissa? Would you like to help me warm up?"

Elissa scooted herself closer to Alistair and set her head on his shoulder. He remained still as she sighed pleasantly and closed her eyes. It was a good feeling to be able to lean on someone you cherished. She felt the bad emotions that had been bustling inside her mind slowly evaporate away.

Alistair hoped that Elissa couldn't hear his thumping heart through his armor. He couldn't help noticing her golden brown hair looked so soft illuminated by the light of the fire. Her lashes were dark and thick against her creamy complexion. As he raised his hand to stroke her face, his Chantry training kicked in and he awkwardly froze.

Elissa was no longer the childhood friend from his past…she was now his fellow Grey Warden. One of the few female Grey Wardens in Ferelden, he reminded himself. He would have to be a gentleman as he was trained to do as a templar.

In a few moments, Duncan will be calling them both to plan the strategy for the upcoming battle. He treasured the seconds he was experiencing with Elissa's comfortable weight on his side.

Yes…just like old times.

A group of exhausted soldiers entered the village pub. It was raining heavily outside and they tracked in puddles of muddy water from their armor. The barkeep nodded to them in acknowledgement as they all wearily sat down in their usual spots.

One soldier approached the bar to order something particularly heavy. He removed his helmet and strands of his long black hair fell over his face messily.

"Something stronger than the usual." He requested of the barkeep, who simply grunted and turned around to grab a bottle from the shelf.

"My, my…you're looking more haggard than usual." One of the serving girls came up, leaning against the counter. She was a young and pretty thing who enjoyed flirting with the soldiers that came and went. She had her eye on this individual for quite some time, but he had always waved away her advances with nothing more than a kind word…which made it even more of an enticing challenge for her.

"You have no idea, my dear." He replied in a tired voice. "Tramping around the swamps out here is not the best way to take in the scenery."

She giggled at his remark and reached into her apron pocket. She pulled out a water-stained letter. "This came in for you the other day. I was hoping you'd come back in here sooner or later so I could give it to you."

"Ah, that's rare. Thank y-" He reached over for the letter but she snapped the letter back.

She gave a provocative smile. "I specifically held this for you…and it looks quite important. But I made sure not to open it or let anyone else see it's contents. What is my reward, Ser Nathaniel?"

Nathaniel gave a chuckle and dug into his pocket. He held up a silver coin. "I appreciate your services, my dear. Would this do?"

The serving girl sighed and accepted his tip. Apparently Nathaniel Howe had the naivete of a Chantry alter boy. She handed the letter over to him. "Like I said, it only arrived a few days ago. The delivery boy was quite insistent that it came to your hands."

"Thank you." Nathaniel replied and turned the letter over in his hands. The parchment was sealed with a wax imprint of the Howe crest. The serving girl walked off as another customer called for her attention and the barkeep placed a glass of whiskey in front of Nathaniel and went off to fill the other orders.

Nathaniel sighed as he thumbed the seal on the letter. In the past couple years, the correspondences from his father have been few and far in between. And it was never a familial letter of the Arl checking on his oldest son. They were normally orders on what else he had to do in Free Marches.

He wished that his father would at least send an update on what was going on with the family. Delilah and Thomas must almost be full grown by now. Even an update on the Couslands would be nice. There wasn't a night that passed that Nathaniel wondered how Elissa was faring. He liked to think that she might be thinking of him as much as he did.

Nathaniel broke open the seal and unfolded the paper, expecting another short order from his father on what needed to be done. He picked up his whiskey to sip on as he read the contents. After a minute, his eyes widened and the glass slipped from his fingers and shattered onto the old wooden floor.

"Oy! Howe! What's wrong?!" One of the soldiers turned at the sound of the breaking glass. Nathaniel was pale and gripping the letter so hard that his knuckles were white. "Are you okay? You look as though you have just seen Andraste's ghost!"

"No…no…this can't be right." He muttered in disbelief, running his free hand through his long hair.

To my dear brother Nathaniel,

I apologize that I have not written to you since you have been in Free Marches. And I am even more sorry that the news I am writing about will be my first letter to you. It is most likely that Father will not inform you of what has happened, but I feel you must be told.

Several nights ago, The Howe armies have attacked Highever. From the reports that I have heard, Teyrn and Teyrna Cousland are confirmed to be dead. Fergus and Elissa Cousland have not been found, so there are no confirmations whether or not they are alive.

When I asked Father why he has attacked Highever, he simply says that the Couslands have done a great injustice to the King and Ferelden. He will not tell me what this injustice was.

Please do not drop everything and come back, Nathaniel. Please do not send father any letters questioning this act. I have submitted this letter without his knowledge, because it is for sure that he will be angry at me if he finds out. I will do my best to find out what has happened and let you know immediately once I learn everything.

Please be safe, brother. I pray to the Maker every night hoping you are well and alive.

Your sister,

Delilah