I should be writing an essay on one of the women in Parzival. Instead, I am on here, updating and reading. Plus, I just realized that I will not be able to update next weekend because of me not being home, or rather, because of me being home. Confusing, I know. Anyways, there are two options: Either I update with a new chapter tomorrow and leave you hanging until December 5th, or I update in the middle of the week, i.e. November 25th/26th. Your choice, you can put the one you prefer in your review.
Jennifer Shepard had had to put up with a lot of things during her career. Men that thought women were supposed to be good looking assets, not the ones leading an investigation. Drunks that grabbed her ass while she was undercover during a mission. Other directors that thought of her as emotional and were only waiting for her to quit her job. But an agent that let a terrorist escape when said terrorist's mission was to kill the agent in question? That had to be a first. One time she could forgive. Ziva had been surprised to see the half-sister of her dead brother in the alley and not had time to react. But a second time? That was just plain stupid, bordering on suicidal.
"What on earth is wrong with you?" Gibbs yelled at the Mossad officer, while Jen stood back, watching him, not in the mood to interfere. As much as she pitied Ziva for having to make the decision, Kadira could not live. As long as she was out on the street, she was an immense threat to anyone on Team Gibbs, not just Ziva. Jen had dealt with enough terrorists to know that if they could not get to their target directly, they would start taking out those that mattered the most to them. And in this case, it was Tony, McGee, Abby, Gibbs and herself, though she doubted that she was in that much danger herself. No, more likely they would go after Tony first, because he meant the most to Ziva. Or possibly Abby, who did not have any field training. Jen made a quick mental note to arrange for extra security for the forensic scientist.
Ziva just stared ahead, her jaw set, eyes unseeing, gaze fixed on a point on Jen's office wall. Jen heaved a small sigh and pushed away from the wall she had been leaning up against.
"Ziva, look at me." she asked the Mossad liasion, waiting until Ziva slowly turned her head, glaring at her. "If this were only about you, I would not have a problem with your decision. But this is not just about you, Ziva. Listen to me, Goddamit!" Jen yelled, as Ziva rolled her eyes slightly. She walked over to her, taking Gibbs' place right on front of her, invading her personal space, something she knew Ziva hated like nothing else. Screw the pride of the Israeli, this was too important that Jen could avoid stepping on her toes. If it helped to get heer point across, she would do it.
"Their target may be you. But you know just as well as I do that if they can't get to you directly, they will turn against those close to your heart. Do you really want something to happen to Abby? To McGee? Or Gibbs? Or me? Or to DiNozzo? You work together with those people, Ziva. It's your responsibility to keep them safe, just as it is mine. Now I don't want to do this, but you don't leave me much of a choice. I'm ordering you, the next time you see Kadira Esfiri, you will not hesitate to take action. She will not escape a third time, Ziva. Have I made myself clear?" Jen asked, her eyes hard, her voice stern. Ziva blinked, before shaking her head.
"Ziva-" Jen started again, but Ziva took a step back from her. Her hand went to her belt, where she kept her badge and gun. Pulling the latter from the holster, she took the clip out. Wordlessly, she placed her gun and clip on Jen's desk, then retrieved her badge, and put it next to her weapon. She looked at Gibbs, and then back at Jen, before giving a curt nod and leaving her office. Jen just stared at the closing door, unable to react, not knowing what to do.
"She did not just resign. Tell me she did not just hand in her gun and badge?!" Jen turned to Gibbs, panic etched across her face, her voice shrill even to her own ears. He just rubbed a hand over his face, as much at a loss as his old partner, now turned boss was. Loyalty was important to Ziva, he had always known that. But why she was loyal to a person that wanted to take her out was beyond him.
"Jethro..." Jen whispered, turning her head, staring at Ziva's gun. How was she to protect her friend when she did not belong to NCIS anymore? When she actually had terminated her liaison position? Would she tell her father? Or leave it to Jen to deal with Director David, the man that made Jen want to strangle someone, preferably him, whenever she had to speak to him? Jen felt fury and anger rising inside her, and quickly latched onto the feeling. She could deal with anger. She could use a bit of her fury, direct it to the task at hand. Everything was better than the tears that had welled up in her eyes seconds ago, the fear she had felt bubbling under the surface. Fear was paralyzing. Anger on the other hand forced her to take action.
"Protective custody." Jethro said. Jen snapped her head back up, looking at him, her brows furrowed. "You wanna protect her, that's the only way I can think of." he added, shrugging.
"And you don't? You're acting as if that's none of your business!" she yelled at him, suddenly furious. He had driven her away. He had yelled at her, he had made Ziva draw her walls back up. Instead of trying to coax her into telling them what was wrong, he had made her angry, and Jen had taken his lead against her better judgment. Damn him. Damn his influence on her actions.
"It isn't, not anymore." Gibbs said, turning around as she walked to her desk. Jen glared at him, clenching her fists. Suddenly, she felt like she was about to explode. She quickly grabbed the empty glass that sat on her desk and smashed it against the wall.
"Like hell it isn't!" she screamed, whirling around as his hand touched her shoulder. She pushed him back, making him stumble backwards.
"She was your agent! Part of your team! You don't care if she lives or dies!" Jen yelled, hitting his chest, blindly smacking against him, her fists clenched. Tears welled up in her eyes again. She felt so powerless, so small and helpless. Like she could do nothing to change things, and it scared her. It scared her to realize that there was a real chance of losing Ziva, losing one of the best friends she had ever had. And it would be her fault, because she could not protect her, because she had driven her away, because she had refused to listen to her, refused to let her explain herself. She had acted without thinking, and it would cost her one of the few people she trusted her life with.
She felt Jethro's arms wrap around her, pulling her closer as the first sobs escaped her. He pulled her against his chest, his hand reaching up, tangling in her hair, pulling her head against his chest. He softly kissed her red curls, murmuring words of comfort as he rocked her slowly, providing much needed comfort. And Jen closed her eyes and buried her face in his chest, crying over mistakes, past and present.
Yes, OOC for Jen, I know. But there was something between her and Ziva in the first episodes of S3 that was never explained, some kind of bond/attachment that I doubt would have been on Ziva's side simply because she saved Jen's life. There was more than we were told. And I'm a Jibbs-shipper, perhaps I was just looking for a way to get Gibbs to comfort her, hehe.