Misadventures in Overland Chapter Five

London Calling

Alannah slowly woke up, staring at the ceiling above her. She grinned as she remembered the night before. Her Veritas Tea had caused quite the sensation at the party. Margaret had wandered over at one point, her face white and tearfully thanked Alannah for confirming what she had dreaded and suspected all along. Alannah had been slightly amazed when Margaret had ruefully admitted she was going to remain married, but Alice had told her later that a divorce would cause even more of a scandal and make Margaret a pariah in Society.

"She has no choice but to remain married to him, even though he is a boor and a cur. To do otherwise would invite gossip and rumor mongering." Alice had told her. Alannah had shaken her head in amazement at the strange Overland custom.

Now she climbed out of bed, singing softly to herself. Today was the day! Alice had promised to give Tarrant and her a grand tour of London. Alannah dressed quickly, heading for the main hall. Alice and Tarrant were already there, conversing in low tones. Alannah smiled softly as she noticed Tarrant gently place his arms around Alice. She blinked, noticing that something about Alice seemed different.

Alice looked around and saw Alannah. She grinned broadly, and waved her over. She was practically glowing with excitement as she told Alannah her plans for the day.

"We'll go to the Tea Shops, and we'll stop by the palace, and perhaps visit the shops, Oh, Alannah, we'll need to go to a symphony so you can hear Overland music, I think there's one that is performing Beethoven's works, you'll love him, and we'll also have to go to Hyde Park, I loved going there as a girl, and.."

"Alice!" Tarrant and Alannah replied in unison. Tarrant looked at Alannah, and grinned. "I think our Rambles have rubbed off on her." Alice blushed deeply.

"I am sorry, but I am rather excited. I've never really had the chance to show off my home to friends, and I am really looking forward to our outing."

Alannah laughed. "So are we, Alice. I'm sure Tarrant and I are going to have a marvelously mad time. Aren't we?"

Tarrant grinned. "That we are. Alice, lead on." Alice grinned, and then led them outside where a small carriage sat waiting. Alannah blanched slightly. Tarrant looked sideways at her, and mouthed "Maxwell?" Alannah gulped, and then nodded once. Tarrant gave her a gentle hug of reassurance. "You have nothing to fear."

Alannah smiled, and then climbed into the carriage.

The first stop they made was at a small tea shop. Alannah and Tarrant looked around in slight wonder at the stark décor. Tarrant grinned and nudged Alannah, pointing to one of the small tea tables that were arranged throughout the shop. A small man sat there, a large purple teapot in front of him. This, however, was not what caused the Underlanders to look at each other and grin madly. It was the man himself. He had a large, bushy beard that was neatly combed, with large beetle like eyebrows, and frizzy hair that seemed to float about his head like a black halo. As if that alone was not enough, he was also wearing a suit of the brightest yellow.

Alannah grinned madly and walked over to the man, who was reading a newspaper and muttering quietly under his breath. "Bloody stupid people living 'round here, you ask me." He gradually realized he was being watched, and slowly looked up at Alannah. "Might I help you, young lady?" His voice was surprisingly deep for someone of his stature.

Alannah grinned. "May I join you, Sir? You see, I was hoping to run into a few madmen while in Overland, and you look like you are madder than a March hare."

The man gaped at her, and then laughed boomingly. "I would be delighted to have you join me, Miss! Please, sit! Would you care for some tea?"

Alannah sat, and smiled madly. "I would love some, thank you. Oh! I should introduce myself, shouldn't I? Lady Alannah Stayne, Healer and Singer to Mirana of Marmoreal, Queen of Underland." She stuck her hand out. The man took it, pumping it twice.

"Sir Jeffrey St. Catchpole, at your service. I'm a watchmaker by trade."

Alannah grinned. "A Time Trapper, hey? You know, he only appreciates watches if they are very well made. A cheap watch makes him rather annoyed. He does everything he can to assure they don't run correctly."

Sir Jeffrey looked at her in great affront. "My Lady, my watches are among the finest ever seen in London! The King himself has a watch that I made especially for him! Why, there is no watch made that is more amazing than the ones in my shop!"

Alannah grinned. "You think so?" She turned to where Tarrant was standing with Alice. "Tarrant! Come over here!" Tarrant gently excused himself and walked over.

"You wanted to see me, Alannah?"

Alannah grinned. "Tarrant Hightopp, this is Sir Jeffrey St. Catchpole, Watchmaker Extraordinaire. Sir Jeffrey, this is Tarrant, Hatter to Mirana. Tarrant, Sir Jeffrey claims he has the most fantastic watches ever known to man in his shop. Do you have your watch with you?"

Tarrant smiled, and pulled his watch out of his pocket. "I never go anywhere without it, Alannah." He handed it to her, and she grinned.

"Sir Jeffrey, see what you make of this watch." She handed it over to him, and his jaw dropped.

"Why, it doesn't tell you the time! It has the months and days of the week on it instead! What a funny watch to not tell you what o'clock it is!"

Tarrant laughed, and then looked slyly at Alannah. "Well, why should it? Do any of the Overland watches tell them what year it is?"

Alannah laughed. "Tarrant, you know that in Overland it stays the same year for such a long time." She grinned up at Alice, who had walked over to join the conversation. "I imagine this sounds familiar."

Alice laughed. "Indeed it does. Tarrant seemed to take a great delight in confounding me, and Thackery was no better." She smiled fondly at Tarrant. "But even then, I was rather captivated with him. Up until then, the only human I had met was the Duchess, and Time knows she's horrid."

Sir Jeffrey was looking at them with a strangely curious expression. He seemed to want to speak, but unable to form the words. Finally, he managed. "Might I ask what you three are babbling on about?"

Alannah, Tarrant and Alice exchanged glances, grinning madly. Alannah leaned in, staring seriously at Sir Jeffrey. "Have you ever read Alice in Wonderland?"

Sir Jeffrey nodded. "Yes, of course! Mr. Carroll has a true gift for nonsense. Why?"

Alannah smiled. "Because I have a strange and wonderful story to tell, Sir Jeffrey." She motioned a waiter over. "Please bring us a tray full of scones, sandwiches, and four pots of the finest tea you have." The waiter bowed, and went into the kitchen, returning moments later with a tray laden with food.

Alannah gestured to the tray. "Help yourself, Sir Jeffrey while you listen to my tale. It is one filled with strange beings and brave deeds. A tale that you can tell your children and grandchildren. A tale full of magic, mystery, and madness."

Three hours later, the tray was clear of food, all the tea had been drunk, and Sir Jeffrey was staring at them with a mixture of amazement and curiosity. He stammered a few times, and finally found his voice. "That was the most amazing tale I have ever heard." He suddenly beamed happily. "I cannot thank you enough for telling it to me. You have made my life so much better for the hearing of it. I thank you most heartily!"

He stood from the table. "Sadly, I must return to my shop. But please, stop by and I will make you the finest and most beautiful watch I know how. Why, it will even rival the King's own watch! Will you come? It is not far from here."

Alannah bowed her head. "We would be honored, Sir Jeffrey. I believe we have one or two things we need to do first, but I promise that before the day's end you will see us. For now, we must also bid you a fond farewell."

The three of walked out of the Tea Shop into the foggy London climate. Alannah shivered. "London's not very bright, is it?" Alice sighed, shaking her head.

"No, but they're used to it. Now, since Tarrant decided on the Tea Shop as the first place to visit, Alannah-you may decide on the next place."

Alannah grinned at Tarrant. "Not surprised you chose the Tea Shop, but I would have thought perhaps you'd be more interested in finding a Milliner's Shop."

Tarrant waved his hand airily. "Well, I had considered it, but really, those poor hat makers wouldn't know what to do with me." Alice and Alannah burst out laughing. Tarrant pouted at Alice. "It's not that funny, love." Alice didn't reply, but instead kissed him gently.

Alannah had finally gotten herself under control and was about to name her choice when her eyes were suddenly riveted to Alice. The nagging feeling that something was different about her flared up stronger than ever. She quickly let her eyes roam over her body, and then suddenly gasped sharply as the revelation hit.

Alice looked over at her, concerned. "Alannah, what is the matter?"

Alannah smiled warmly at her. "Nothing is the matter, Alice. In fact, if what I suspect is true, then everything is wonderfully right. I don't suppose there's a bookshop around here?"

Alice blinked at the strange shift in subjects, and then nodded. "Yes, of course. It's this way." She walked off down the street, Tarrant and Alannah following behind. Tarrant looked over at Alannah, speaking quietly so Alice couldn't overhear.

"What do you suspect to be true? Is it something I need to be concerned with? Will it affect Alice in any way? Should we cut the trip short? Does she need medicine?"

Alannah chuckled. "To answer the second question first, no you have no reason to be concerned. Alice is a remarkably strong woman, and I have the feeling she will manage nicely. The third question's answer is yes, it will affect her. It is something that affects nearly all women whose men are…shall we say…amorous. There is no need to cut the trip short, and by the time she reaches the point where she will need medicine, we'll be back at Marmoreal."

Tarrant gaped at her. "You…are you saying that Alice is…" he couldn't finish. Alannah grinned and nodded.

It was at that moment that Tarrant Hightopp, Hatter to the White Queen, Hero of the Frabjous Day, and former Leader of The Resistance did something he had never done before. He fainted dead away.