Okies...

YOU WADDLE, YOU WADDLE, YOU WADDLE LIKE A PENGUIN!

My sister has just taught me that... I have now officially declared it the 5th Nat'l anthem of Leslie-land! Okay, i feel weird and sleep-deprived today... maybe cuz i AM!

YAY! leslie re-read the book for the thirteenth time! okay, sophie live UNDER stairs... now must go change it!...(; ;)... anyway, i have friend who like movie better than book. I find that sad. I prefer the book; Howl is funnier and Sophie has magic. And there's a lot of happy endings. And she has a magic staff/stick/wand.

There shall be summary of prev. chappie then story. Ok? And you know the rules. Good. On your mark, get set, BANANA! On you mark, get set, GUAVA! On your mark, get set, PRUNE! On your mark, get set, LYCH-- shut up already and let them read, you dum-bass!--fine, then!-- GO!

Howl got grilled, like a fish. Nothing else to it, really. Fanny, Lettie, and Martha did the honors.

Now, is it Sophie's turn?

Around seven, there came a knock at the door. After taking a deep breath, Howl slowly turned the knob black-down. Then he waited for a few seconds. Finally, he opened the door, just as Megan was about to knock again. She looked more than a little annoyed by that.

"Megan, Mari, Neil! Welcome!"

"Who're they?" Neil wanted to know, looking at Sophie and Michael a bit warily.

"Sophie's my housekeeper and Michael...err... he's a boarder. He...erm... needed a place to stay and I...needed the money."

"So, Howell. What have you been up to now? Lazing about still?"

"I'll have you know, I have a job. An HONEST one."

He was cut off by an squeal from Mari who had been patiently waiting for all the grown-up talk to stop.

"Uncle Howell, Uncle Howell! There's a SPIDER over there! Kill it, kill it!"

"Mari, cariad! You shouldn't be afraid of a spider; they're more afraid of you than you are of them. Look how much bigger you are than one. It's probably quaking in its boots. Let the spider run away."

"All right."

Meanwhile, Neil was taking down mental notes. Mari Notes, Number 34268: Also scared by spiders...

There was a large, awkward silence.

"Very well, then. Shall we go eat now?"

"Yes, let's. Mari, Neil. Time to eat."

"I heard you the first time, Mum." Neil scowled, but followed them all to the table.

Michael had left after being introduced. He did not want to see any green slime suddenly manifest in everyone's food.

Most of the dinner conversation was held up single-handedly by Mari's chirping (not like she's annoying kind chirping, cheerful, child chirping). She did not seem to notice that the only conversation the Grown-Ups made to each other consisted mostly of Megan complimenting some dishes, Sophie replying thank you, Megan ragging on Howl, and Howl nagging back. All in all, it would've been a rather somber affair without Mari.

By the second course, she had decided that Sophie should be her new big sister or aunt and kept asking Howl if he was going to marry her.

Howl was waiting and waiting for Megan to grill Sophie, but it never happened, a fact that made Sophie rather smug.

Sophie was beginning to see that Howl wasn't totally wrong about Megan, but was still civil, trying to change that impression.

Neil was lost in the shuffle and contented himself with looking at the fire and imagining a face in it.

Michael was not there, having dinner at Martha's house.

Before they went on to the dessert, Howl stood.

"Megan, Neil, Mari, I have two announcements to make. First, Sophie's not just my housekeeper; she's also my fiancee."

Mari was over-joyed. "That means I have a new aunt! When are you getting married? I think Sophie will be a nice aunt. She seems nice, doesn't she, Neil?"

Megan, however looked more relieved than thrilled. "It's about time you got engaged. Maybe you'll settle down now and get an honest occupation. Maybe you'll actually be a credit to us for once." Then she turned to Sophie with a rather tired smile. "I wish you luck in your marriage--"

Before she got any farther, Neil backed away from the table suddenly.

"Did you see that, did you see that? The fire, it winked at me. It moved... there it goes again!"

"Neil, sit down. It must've been a trick of the light."

"Actually, I had hoped to ease you into this, but I guess not. Megan, I'm a wizard."

"A what? Did I hear you correctly? There are no such things as wizards, just as there is no such thing as magic. Aren't you taking this game a little too far, Howell?"

"Dammit, Megan, I am a wizard! If you must know, you're not in Wales anymore. You're in a country called Ingary where magic does exist. The fire is actually a fire demon named Calcifer. He and I were under a contract which Sophie broke to save our lives."

Mari was thrilled. "Magic is real?"

Sophie broke in. "Yes, Mari, it's real. But you can't tell anyone in your Wales about us."

"It's okay. The kids at school wouldn't believe me anyway. They all say Uncle Howell is just a shiftless unemployed bum. The girls think he's good looking, though."

"You see? Your reputation is already in tatters with the children! Must you have them believe you're crazy too?"

"Uncle Howell? There's someone at the door looking for a Wizard Pendragon."

"What? Oh, Lord."

GAHH! Leslie feels like this was a clunker of a chapter: everything is forced and it doesn't sit right with me. Meh...

REview kindly, please. THis is NOT one of my stellar pieces. TT

I need a break... and a sabbatical, and HELP!

Thank you for listening to my rant and crap.