Chapter 17: Shutting Out
Bella was sitting out on a hill watching as Emmett, and Jasper were racing around a track for their ATV's. For the summer, since Ian suddenly showed up and tried to kill Emmett, they all decided that a trip away from Forks for a few weeks would do them some good. Alice sat down next to Bella with a smile. "How are they doing?" she asked.
"They're having fun," Bella replied smiling.
Alice handed her a soda. "Emmett and Jazzy, this is what they do when it comes to relieving stress," she commented.
"They do this often?" Bella asked.
"When Emmett gets stressed. The three of them look out for each other," Alice replied.
Bella smiled as she watched as Emmett sped by Jasper who then revved up the engine on his ATV, going after him. "I don't think I have ever seen Emmett in so much pain in my life," Bella commented slowly.
"You're here, Bells, that always makes Emmett's day," she commented.
Bella smiled a little when the guys pulled up on their ATV's. "Hey babe," he said grinning.
"Hey," she answered smiling.
"Hop on," he told her.
"Uh I don't think so," she answered.
"Yeah, yeah, come on," he told her.
She let out a yelp when he pulled her up onto the back of the ATV while Alice sat behind Jasper, wrapping her arms around his waist. "Hold on tight baby," Emmett told her with a grin as he sped off. Bella kept her arms around Emmett's waist as he sped down the trail.
After awhile, he stopped the ATV and they got off. Bella bit her lower lip when she saw a beautiful waterfall. "Wow…" she whispered. Emmett kissed the side of her head. "How are you?" she asked.
"I'm doing alright baby," he answered.
He kissed her shoulder softly. "You were restless last night," she commented. He let out a sigh.
"I just had a lot on my mind," he replied quietly.
Resting his forehead against her shoulder, he let out a deep breath. "Want to talk about it?" she asked.
"Not now baby," he answered.
She nodded her head slowly. She let out a shriek when he suddenly lifted her up off the ground. "What are you doing?" she asked.
"We're going to have fun," he replied.
Bella tried to wriggle out of Emmett's grip. "No! No!" she exclaimed while laughing as he ran into the water with her. Emmett started climbing up on the rocks. "EMMETT DON'T!" she laughed hitting his arm.
Climbing to the edge, Emmett let out a sigh. "You really want me to put you down?" he asked.
"Yes," she answered.
Sighing again, he placed the girl onto the ground. "Fine," he told her.
"Thank you," she answered.
Emmett grinned as Bella tried to walk away. "Nope changed my mind," he told her grabbing her again.
"DON'T!" she shouted as he jumped off the edge.
They landed in the lake with a loud splash. Alice and Jasper were on the shore laughing hysterically at the two of them. Breaking the surface, Bella gasped for air. When Emmett surfaced, he had a huge grin on his face. "You jerk!" she exclaimed, splashing him in the face. He was still grinning.
"Ah you liked it," he answered.
She rolled her eyes a little. "I'm going back to shore," she told him swimming away. She let out a shriek when he grabbed a hold of her leg, pulling her back. "Em!" she exclaimed. He grinned as he pulled her to him.
"It was just fun Gorgeous," he answered.
"Yeah well, you're lucky I didn't wear the new clothes Alice bought or it wouldn't be me killing you for that stunt," she commented.
Smiling, she wrapped her arms around his neck. "It was kind of fun," she answered. He wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her close.
"I knew you'd enjoy yourself," he commented.
Resting her forehead against his, she closed her eyes.
After awhile they swam over to the waterfall, sitting on the rocks. Biting her lower lip, she looked over at her boyfriend to see the white t-shirt he was wearing clinging to him. "Hey Em," she called.
"Yeah Gorgeous," he answered leaning back against a rock looking at her.
"Are you…really okay since the Ian incident?" she asked.
Moving his fingers through his wet hair, he let out a deep breath. "I'll be alright Gorgeous, seriously. Dad's been helping me out," he replied. He closed his eyes. "I'm not the same five-year-old boy who wakes up in the middle of the night screaming for my mom," he added. Bella carefully moved over to his side, sitting next to him.
"Emmett…you were tossing and turning last night," she whispered.
"Bella, please, I don't want to get into it," he answered.
Bella bit her lower lip, resting her head on his chest. "Sorry baby, I just don't want what I'm going through ruin our trip," he told her. Before Bella could answer him, she looked up to see a car pulling up. "Well, well, look who decided to join us," he commented. Holding onto her hand, they jumped back into the water, swimming to shore.
Grabbing a towel, Emmett grinned at the people who joined them on the trip. "Well, well, Eddie and Rosie welcome," he said smiling.
"Hey Emmett," Edward answered opening Rosalie's door.
The Cullens had adopted Rosalie at the same time as Emmett. During junior year, Edward and Rosalie started going out and they had been inseparable ever since. Emmett wrapped a towel around his girlfriend, wrapping his arms tightly around her. Bella smiled, resting her hands over his. "How's Chicago?" he asked.
"It's interesting," Rosalie replied.
Edward rolled his eyes a little, as they sat down in the chairs they had set up. "I'm going to go change," Bella informed Emmett before disappearing into the tent. Alice looked over at her brother with a raised eyebrow.
"What?" he asked.
"You know what," she replied.
"I wouldn't be asking if I knew," he told her.
She rolled her eyes a little. "Not talking to Bella. Carlisle told you not to keep things in," she told him.
"You have hearing like a vampire," he told her.
Alice sighed. "Ali, just drop it," he answered.
"Carlisle said not to let it bottle up," she told him in a song voice.
"Well you need to mind your own business," Emmett answered mocking her.
Alice sighed as she sat down in Jasper's lap, smiling as he wrapped his arms around her waist.
Later that night, Bella was wrapped up in Emmett's arms, but she was so out of it she couldn't hear him mumbling in his sleep. Emmett's nightmares plagued him, repeating over and over in his head like a broken record.
Three-year-old Emmett was sitting in the corner of his room. His mother squatted down in front of him, her bright blue eyes staring into his. "You listen to me baby okay? You just stay right here and don't come out no matter what you hear," she told him.
"Mama…" he started.
"Promise me Emmett you won't come out of this closet," she told him.
"I pwomise mama," he answered.
She kissed his forehead gently. "I love you so much, remember that okay? Remember mama loves you so much," she told him.
"I wuv you too mama," he answered.
"Just wait here, stay here," she whispered.
Emmett watched as she disappeared from the closet. "Where is he Alana?" he snapped.
"You won't find him!" she hissed.
Emmett moved over to the door of the closet, peaking through the crack. "Tell me where he is Alana!" he snapped.
"No!" she snapped.
Her piercing blue eyes were glaring daggers at the man. "You monster you won't touch my boy!" she hissed. Emmett's eyes widened in horror when the man grabbed his mother, throwing her against the wall.
"WHERE?" he shouted.
Alana spit at him in response but then her eyes widened in horror when he held the gun to her. "Where is he?" he hissed. Emmett let out a little yelp from the fear. The closet door was ripped open and he was dragged from the closet.
"NO!" Alana screamed.
The little boy hit the hardwood floor with another yelp. "Problem solved," he heard Ian hissed. Emmett lifted his head up to see the gun pointed right at him.
"NO!" the woman screamed at the top of her lungs as she covered her son with her body as the gun went off.
Emmett shot up from his sleeping bag with a gasp. "NO!" he shouted. Bella was also sitting up in her sleeping bag.
"Emmett, it's okay," she told him.
She rested her hand on his warm, sweaty skin from his nightmare. He lied back on the pillow, letting out a deep breath. "You're okay," she whispered. He let out a shaky breath, closing his eyes. "Emmett, talk to me, please talk to me," she insisted. She moved her fingers over the tiny scar that was on his shoulder.
"We both have scars from our pasts Bells," he murmured.
She let out a sigh. "I didn't mean to wake you," he said quietly.
"I don't care about that. Emmett, this new you. I don't like it," she told him.
"What are you talking about? I'm the same me," he answered.
"No you're not," she answered.
Reaching above their heads she turned on the lamp. "You're shutting me out. We used to tell each other everything," she murmured. She held his hand, letting out a deep breath. "Emmett, you won't talk to me. It's killing me that you refuse to talk to me. Every time I bring it up you shut me out," she told him.
"I don't want to talk about it," he answered.
"You're doing it again," she told him.
"Bella, just drop it. I don't want to talk about it," he insisted.
"I don't want to drop it. I want to know what happened to Emmett! The Emmett I fell in love with, where is he?" she asked.
Emmett got up from the sleeping bag, pulling on his clothes. "Bella, the last thing I want to do is talk about what the hell is going on with me," he answered.
"That's what couples do! Look at you, you're pushing me away again!" she exclaimed.
"I'm not pushing you away," he answered.
"What do you think this is?" she demanded gesturing to what he was doing.
He looked at her. "You know what Bella? Why don't you mind your own damn business and leave me the hell alone and stop nagging me about talking about what the hell is wrong with me!" he snapped. Bella sat there in shock as he pulled on his shoes.
"Where are you going?" she asked.
"I don't know, just not staying here," he replied.
He climbed out of the tent with Bella right behind him. "Emmett…" she started.
"Just stay away from me Bella! Just…Just stay away!" he answered before walking off.
Bella felt like someone had taken an iron fist and punched it through her chest as he walked off. "Emmett!" she called going after him. Emmett let out a shaky breath, closing his eyes as she chased after him. She grabbed a hold of his arm. "LOOK AT ME!" she shouted at him. He turned around, but his eyes were still at the ground. "Dammit Emmett look at me!" she demanded.
"Stay away from me Bella," he answered looking at her.
"Why?" she asked.
Emmett let out a sigh. "Emmett, why should I stay away? Before you couldn't wait to be with me now you're acting like I have some sort of disease," she told him.
"I'm scared Bella!" he answered almost too loudly.
She stared at him quizzically. "What could you possibly be afraid of?" she asked.
"You want to know what I dream about every night? Do you? I picture in my head over and over again what he did! I picture it in my head of the terror on her face!" he answered.
Bella bit her lower lip. "What scares the hell out of me, is that I care too much," he told her.
"What do you mean?" she asked.
"I liked Anita and my foster siblings. I like my dad and my mom and my brothers and sister. But you…you are the only person in this world I love more than anything," he answered.
She could see all the pain in his eyes as he spoke. "Bella, if anything happened to you…I…I wouldn't be able to bear it. I loved my mother more than anything and she died. It kills me everyday even now. But Bella, if I lost you…" he trailed off. There was silence between them. "I can't live without you Bella, I wouldn't survive much longer if anything happened to you," he told her.
"Emmett…" she said quietly.
Moving closer, she gave his hand a squeeze. "I am not going anywhere. Not for the longest time. Do you have any idea how much I love and need you as much as you love and need me? I can't live without you either. It kills me when I'm not with you. I love you too much to even imagine not having you with me. Emmett, look at me," she said quietly.
She placed her hand on his face. "I'm not going anywhere," she whispered. Swallowing hard, Emmett rested his forehead against the top of her head. "I love you, so much," she whispered.
"I love you, more than anything," he answered holding onto her.
"Come on, let's go back to bed," she whispered.
Nodding he held her hand as they went back into the tent. They walked by everyone else who had woken up from the shouting. Alice gave them a small smile before going back to her own tent with Jasper.
Once Emmett and Bella were back in their tent, he wrapped his arms securely around her waist. Sighing, she rested her head on his chest. "I'm always here," she whispered.
"As am I," he answered.
He kissed the top of her head as they both fell asleep wrapped up in each other's protective embraces.