Just to be clear with everyone, everything in this chapter past the first line break is a flashback to last summer after Team Gibbs left Tel Aviv without Ziva!

A/N: Ok so who watched Tuesday's epic episode? Holy crap, I know what you are all thinking but remember last season, how SB lead us to believe something totally different than what actually happened; well that's what he is doing AGAIN! UHHHHHHHGGG! I can't wait until next week! Excited but sad because it's the last new episode until September! I think that I actually might die over the summer, although, it is an opportunity to catch up on Seasons 3-6 though! I am very behind! Anyways, enjoy and as always, you are very welcome to review!

Erin

PS: The song(in bold) is To Be With You by David Archuleta

Chapter 4-To Be With You

As Tony watched the sun rise outside Ziva's hospital room window, he thought back to last summer. How every morning, after returning from Israel, he would arrive at NCIS just before sunrise. He would sit at his desk and watch the sun as it greeted a new day; one more day without her.

Crap, I'm late. Who cares? What do I have to look forward to anymore? Now that Ziva was back in Tel Aviv, his world seemed to have come to a standstill. He was late more often then usual; he was even being nice to McGee. Gibbs had seemed to be picking up on this but never said anything. He assumed that Tony could deal with it himself; after all, he is a grown man . . . sort of. He would sit at his desk (not too many cases to solve after Israel), usually doing paperwork. God, I hate paperwork. Come on you stupid phone ring already so I can get out of here. Maybe Ziva will call today . . . tell me that she is coming home. Ziva . . . God, how stupid was I? The love of my life has been right in front of me for the past five years . . . I let her go. God, Ziva, I just want to be with you;

He would sit at home, beer in hand, television on some National Geographic thing or something boring like that. He would switch it off and then turn on the stereo. He only listens to songs that remind him of her or ones that explain his feelings in a way that he can't.

I've been alone so many nights now
And I've been waiting for the stars to fall
I keep holding out, for what, I don't know
To be with you, just to be with you

So here I am staring at the moon tonight,
wondering how you look in this light.
Maybe you're somewhere thinking' about me too.
To be with you, there's nothing I wouldn't do.

And I can't imagine two worlds spinning' apart
Come together eventually...
And when we finally meet, I'll know it's right.
I'll be at the end of my restless road.
But this journey, it was worth the fight.
To be with you, just to be...

Holding you for the very first time, never letting go.
What I wouldn't give to feel that way...
Oh...Oh, to be with you...
Oh, and I can't imagine two worlds spinning' apart

Come together eventually.

And when you're standing' here in front of me,
that's when I know that God does exist.

'Cause He will have answered every single prayer.
To be with you, just to be with you, yeah.

This is how he felt, every day, every night, all the time, until the day that he brought Ziva home. Tony was not Tony. He longed for her, his heart ached for her. What I wouldn't give to be with you, Ziva. If I could drag you back, I'd do it in a heartbeat. I can't live without you. I dream about you, my heart aches for you, every waking moment of every day that I spend without you. All I wish is that you are ok, and that I could see you one last time . . . to tell you that I love you, Ziva David; I really, truly love you, with all my heart and my soul, and all I want is to be with you.

Tony read to himself from his computer screen. He wished he had some way that he could send this. An address, or a phone number, so he could at least tell her before it was too late. Tony heard Gibbs arrive in the elevator and quickly saved the email and closed his inbox.