(Warning: The following is non-profit fan-based product. Naruto and Naruto Shippuden are property of Masashi Kishimoto and TV Tokyo. Please support the official release of the manga and anime series)
Chapter 4: Uproar in the jungle
It was dark and silent behind the gates. Every inch of the chamber covered in shadows, but these were no ordinary shadows mind you. The shadows seemed almost infinite, constantly curling and turning in on them selves. So dark that not even a single sliver of light leaked into the room. The air was cold and damp, far more then it had been on the outside. And on the endlessly stretching stone floor, sat four sulking, shivering children, Koten, Uten, Shou, and Jou. Shortly after they had hurtled themselves into the black room, they had attempted to search for a route of escape. But the four had long given up on exiting the dank room, because the entrance from wince they had come had seemingly disappeared, and as fanatically as they searched, they could not find a sign of any exit. Instead the floor seemed to stretch on eternally into the dark expanses of the chamber. And so the four crouched low to the ground, cradling their legs in their arms in a futile attempt to warm them selves.
Time was not a factor in this world. Without the positioning of the moon and sun, it could not be told how long they sat there. So they just sat, motionless, and quiet, even the twins, who were usually so energetic and playful. The only member of the group who showed any sigh of movement-Though it was very difficult to see in the darkness-was Uten, who was trying to pull down her skirt. As she sat in the cold, she felt the frigid air pierce at her exposed thighs. She was sorely regretting her decision to wear a skirt with shorts underneath. She tried to pull down the cloth enough to cover her aching thighs, but not too much as to reveal her panties to the snickering twins. And then, through the darkness, fluttered something light and soft, which landed at Utens's feet. Since she could not make out what it was, she instead picked it up and held it to her face, feeling the soft warmth of cotton cloth. It was Koten's cherished kimono, which he almost never removed. "Use it as a blanket. Nobody here wants to see your granny panties." Said Koten who ended the deadening silence with his charismatic voice. Uten most definitely did not wear granny panties, she wore a soft flexible pair of red panties with a strawberry pattern, but she was distracted from this fact by the shirtless form of Koten.
She stared at the athletically toned muscles of his abdominals and pecks, which were the result of years of laborious training. She had never noticed how broad his shoulders had become since the first day they met at the tinder age of five. She then blushed, and glared at him as she pulled the soft robe over her throbbing legs. "Thanks." She said simply. Even though within her chest-Though she refused to acknowledge it-her heart was pounding vigorously. Shou and Jou let out two stifled laughs as they covered their mouths. "Shou, do you see what I see? It's like a corny romance movie, except the chick looks like a dude." "I see it Jou. It's a shame that Uten covered up her panties, but then again, she probably is wearing granny underwear!"
"Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!" They both giggled hysterically, but Uten abruptly silenced their laughter with her menacing glare, which made her eyes flare up into flames. "I find it touching, the affection of a young man and woman towards one another. " The suddenness of this voice made all four of their hearts stop. The frightening part of it was that it seemingly didn't come from one source, but almost sounded as if it surrounded them, like a whole group of people talking, except it was clearly one resonating voice. It was a deep groaning voice that seemed to growl at them viciously. The group pitched their heads to view the source of the of this booming noise. Koten stood up in the darkness, with his hand ready to grasp the hilt of his katana. "Who are you? Show yourself." "I sincerely express my apologies ladies and gentlemen. Please forgive me, but I have not had the pleasure of receiving many visitors in my little prison, not since I was sealed here over a century ago by that accursed sage." This confusing statement further startled the tiny group. "But please allow me to begin by introducing myself. You may call me the Jubi.
(Meanwhile: In the jungle)
Tatsumaki stormed in fury through the lush green jungle, cutting down the thick jungle growth that lay before him with his dagger sharp kusarigama. He was so determined to seek out his targets, that even when a giant wild lion stepped into his path, he simply head butted it and blazed ahead, leaving its unconscious body behind in the wake of the dust trail he left. He would continually screech out belittling insults into the jungle such as, "Damned monkeys! I'll cut you up and feed you to the tigers!" or, "I'll make a monkey fur coat out of you!" But no matter what he yelled, he was still hell bent on murdering the hairy thefts who had stole his clothing, forcing him to wear a skirt composed of jungle grass and tree leaves. He would not be outwitted by three foolish apes, which were actually blind, deaf, and mute. As he stopped to catch his breath, Tatsumaki came to a clearing where the trees parted, with a ground covered in black earth. Inside the dirt circle he found a shimmering bracelet of beads underneath a bowing palm tree, which like the countless other trees, was enormous. The bracelets, which had been unwittingly dropped by a deaf monkey was the only trail he had to go by to find his assailants.
When he found each bracelet, he would replace it around his wrist. He had done this until he had seven rings of jewelry on one arm, and nine on the other. He then paused to see if any of the monkeys were around. He then chuckled at himself. "Ha ha. I should've known they wouldn't be here. They're prob'ly far off in the trees by now. He then advanced two paces toward his jewelry, and kneeled to retrieve it. But as he pulled, he felt something coil around his ankle. The kneeling palm tree sprang upward, and he was then rapidly hoisted into the air, and violently rocked back and forth. "What the f*uck!" Tatsumaki cried as he dangled above the ground, his arms flailing, dropping his kusarigama, and his kunai and shuriken falling out of his rear pouch.
As he shouted in rage, three figures emerged from the jungle brush. It was the mischievous apes that had stolen Tatsumaki's clothes, and had the actual audacity to wear them. They chattered and whooped in delight as if laughing happily, which they were, except for the mute monkey. The mute monkey grasped the beads with its hairy tail, and brought it to the ground beneath him. The blind monkey proceeded to imitate Tatsumaki's attempt to pick up the bracelet, and then launched himself in the air while whooping in mimicry of Tatsumaki's wailing cries.
The monkeys whooped and chattered until they were out of breath, and all the while Tatsumaki was glowering in rage at them. They had set up a snare trap tied to the palm tree, and left the trail purposefully, in order to bait him. "F*cking monkies! Cut the bull sh*t!" They then continued to whoop and holler even louder as they noticed his perceived girly skirt, as they were standing directly beneath him, and could see its contents in its entirety. "Shut up! It's really cold out here!" Tatsumaki said offended and embarrassed as he tried to pull down his skirt to cover himself. The three clever monkeys continued their celebratory hollering, as they slapped their red buttocks in their odd dance. As they were dancing gaily, something startled the blind monkey. With years of blindness his hearing had become particularly adept to the sounds of the jungle. Within the nearby jungle brush, he heard a rustling noise, and the sound of skeletal leaves being crushed underfoot. He was very familiar with this distinctive sound, which was that of a predator on the prowl. Before he could howl out a warning to his companions, they were immediately surrounded in a tight circle by four giant, spotted leopards, which had pounced on them stealthily from the bushes.
The monkeys ceased their carefree dance, and began to quiver in terror. This was the jungles famous leopard clan, known for their skill in stealth and deadly killing method. As quickly as the others had arrived, four more leopards sprouted from the brush, circling the monkeys along with the rest of the pack. Eight leopards, forming a tighter circle that left no gaps, now surrounded them. One of the leopards, an old one marked with battle scars, advanced to do something shocking, it talked. In a flawless Japanese accent, in a satisfactory tone, it said, " Look what we have here. Why if it isn't the three wise monkeys." Upon finishing its sentence, another leopard beside him spoke in a voice that was distinctly feminine. "Can we eat him Tala-sama?" She said to the scarred jungle cat that was apparently the head of the pack. "Fresh monkey is the best of delicacies." At this statement, the monkeys jolted in surprise. Tala, the leader, paused momentarily. He growled as he pondered his decision. "I don't see why not. Just don't blame me if they give you indigestion."
"Ha-ha-ha-ha! Serves you right you dimwits! You're down there with the giant cats, and I'm up here where they can't get me! Maybe I can fish my clothes out of their crap when they sh*t you out!" The leopards then looked up at Tatsumaki who was dangling beneath the palm tree where the sling hung, spewing insults and teasing the endangered monkies. "Tala-sama, can we eat the hairless monkey? He may be kinda tasty." Said a young leopard with a scarf made of wolf pelts around its neck. Tatsumaki then ceased his taunting, and started to tremble in fear.
"Alright," Tala replied, "but you have t cut him down yourself." The young leopard then broke away from the rest of the pack, and strode to the base of the gigantic tree. Tatsumaki was momentarily relieved; he deduced that the leopard couldn't climb up the tree since it had no leverage, and that he was too high up to be caught. But then his hopes were dashed immediately as the leopard dug his claws into the tree bark, and began to rapidly climb-unbeknownst to Tatsumaki, it also used chakra to attach itself to the tree's rough bark-. With one paw coming after the other in quick succession, it was gaining altitude fast. "F*ck! I'm gonna die! It would have been nice if I at least could've lived long enough to have a girlfriend!" The leopard was almost upon Tatsumaki; while below the other leopards were circling the monkeys, stalking them intensely.
But, before that exact moment when death was lingering just above the heads of our heroes, two kunai flew from the dense woodland of the jungle. One kunai pierced the dirt at the feet of the leopard pack, the other taking root in the rutted bark of the tree trunk where the spry young cat had dug his claws, about to pounce upon the doomed Tatsumaki. Curious about this mysterious deus ex machina, the formerly hunted, and their hunters, turned their heads in the direction in which the daggers had flown. They were all then blessed with the sound of a sweetly lilting which came from the shadows of the wood. "Tala-sama, I thought you knew better than to play with the monkeys." As they heard this, the petite figure of beautiful young lady emerged from the shadows, which were cast by the leaves on an elevated tree, in which she stood on one of its gnarled branches.
Her skin was a dazzling bronzed tan, which glimmered and glowed in the afternoon sunlight. Her face was narrow with a rounded chin, with a mangy mound of matted hair on top of her head. But behind the scruffy strands, were two lovely sapphire blue eyes, which shined like brilliant pools of clear water. Surprisingly, she was clad in a gown composed of leaves, with a grass skirt, similar to Tatsumaki's, which cut off at the mid thigh of her slender legs. She also wore around her arm, a forehead protector that bore the mark of two stones, the insignia of an Iwagakure shinobi. She modestly wore no makeup; besides some purple paint she had brushed onto her nails using the juice of smashed blackberries. As she stepped forward, Tatsumaki stared at her with his mouth agape.
Tala snorted in response to the girl's previous statement. "A meal is a meal Kaumi-chan. Fresh meat can be sometimes hard to come by in these dire times." The pretty girl huffed in reply "Well the monkeys are my friends. I don't want you eating them." The pack then glared intensely at the monkies, who were still quaking in fright of their hunters. They then turned away reluctantly from their meal and strode off into the jungle, the leopard on the tree detaching his claws, and landing skillfully on the forest floor. All of the pack, even Tala, spoke in response to the girl. "Yes Kaumi-hime." They all growled obediently, except for Tala who said it sarcastically. And the pack trudged off, leaving the monkeys to scamper off to the western part of the jungle. "Hey don't let them get away! They have my clothes!" Tatsumaki shrieked angrily. "And don't just leave me hanging like this, my head f*cking hurts!" He continued to rant and yell. And all the while, Kaumi stared at Tatsumaki with an open-mouthed smile, which spread across her face, exposing her pearly teeth.
With poised grace, she jumped from branch to branch until she landed in the fronds of the tree in which Tatsumaki was suspended. "Wow!" she cried. "I've never seen a monkey like you. But where did all your fur go? And why's yer tail missin'?" She was constantly pestering him with many other irritating questions, while Tatsumaki stared at her blankly. She couldn't have been older than him, but he was aware that she was very beautiful for her age. He had not seen that many pretty woman in his life except for in dirty magazines and manga. But one thing struck him about her most of all,
she was dense.
He decided to take advantage of this "Hey, bijin." (AN: Bijin means pretty girl in Japanese) She momentarily stopped her onslaught of questions to pay attention to Tatsumaki. "Listen bijin, you see my kusarigama on the forest floor?" He said gesturing to his weapon. "I want ya to bring it up here and cut me down with it." She looked at him quizzically. "What does bijin mean? Is it another word for leopard?" "Listen bijin, just shut up and go get it." "If I get it and cut you down, will you come back with me and play with the rest of the pack?" Tatsumaki looked at her again. He most definitely would not, but he decided to lie to get what he wanted. "Yeah I'll do whatever ya want, just cut me loose." "You got it Hagezaru-san." She said saluting, and then jumping to the forest floor (AN: Hagezaru- san means Mr. bald ape) "Thanks. And my name's not hagezaru, it's Tatsumaki."
Kaumi was not paying attention to him, instead she held up his kusarigama, which lay in the dirt with the other strewn weapons. She then jumped on the trunk of the palm tree, and raced to the top. "Ok Hagezaru-san, I'm gonna cut you loose." Kaumi said jeeringly "Wait don't cut me down unless there's someone down there to catch me!" Tatsumaki said startled. "That's silly Hagezaru-san. If you're a monkey, you'll just land on your hands." "But I'm not a mon-!" He said as his bond was cut, and plummeted to the ground. He landed on his cranium, and a trickle of blood bled from his head, and pooled in the dirt. "Hagezaru-san! Are you okay?" Kaumi shouted in concern, peeking out from the palm fronds. Tatsumaki's back smacked against the soil, and he managed to say on faint sentence before he passed over into the blackening of unconsciousness, "My name's not Hagezaru."
(Chapter three. Not much to say. Stay tuned for the next thrilling chapter. And also if some of you are offended by the pervy, dirty jokes I tell, then don't bother reading anymore. I'd like to thank my friend Micah for giving me the inspiration for Kaumi's character. And Micah will also be making her own fanfic, so stay logged in for that. And remember: This is a non-profit fan-based product. Naruto and Naruto Shippuden are property of Masashi Kishimoto and TV Tokyo. Please support the official release of the manga and anime series)