Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or any of the characters, I just like playing with them.
(EPOV)
As the sun set, we pulled away from the little town where our lives had been changed forever. I was ecstatic to have Bella in my arms once more. This was a new beginning and it would take a while for us to heal from what I had done. After I left her in the woods I only thought of my pain and hers, I hadn't stopped to consider how this affected the rest of my family. I had not realized how much Bella meant to them all. She wasn't just mine to love, she was a sister and a daughter in our family. As she lay in my arms, I couldn't tear my eyes away from her beautiful face. Her lips had some color to them, and she was healing, her heart beat strong and her breaths were deep and even. I was relieved and I was terrified. Terrified that when she woke up and saw me, that she would reject me. It would be my fault and I wouldn't blame her one bit if she never wanted to lay eyes on me again. I would never leave her again, I could never break her trust again. She had to trust me again.
I watched her sleep as we drove, soaking in every detail of her. There was a mall in Bellingham, where we would stop to pick up some clothes and other items Bella would need. Once we crossed into Canada there wouldn't be more than a few towns along the way. Carlisle and Alice went into the mall while Jasper and I waited in the jeep with Bella. An hour later they returned loaded down with bags from several different stores. Jasper chuckled as Carlisle feigned exhaustion, slumping in the drivers seat. Alice rolled her eyes and hopped back into the van.
"Did you expect anything less boys? You know the damage could have been much, much worse. Bella's going to need a whole new wardrobe of course."
We continued on our journey, crossing into Canada through side roads. The drive would only take about twenty-four hours. The trees and landscape flew by at inhuman speed, and we had no need to stop for food or sleep. We stopped once for Carlisle to give Bella more sedative, otherwise it was a quiet and uneventful drive.
The house in Denali was a huge log cabin nestled in between several national parks. There were no neighbors, and plenty of wildlife to hunt, including bears for Emmett. The coven consisted of Irina, Tanya, and Kate who considered themselves sisters, and then Carmen and Eleazar who were mates. As we drove up to the massive lodge, the entire clan, along with the rest of our family, were waiting for us in the snow. Carlisle rushed into Esme's waiting arms, and he gave everyone a quick update while Jasper and Alice began unloading the jeep. Emmett was pleased to see his jeep, and gave it the once over to make sure she was in good shape. Wanting to shield Bella from the freezing temperatures, I scooped her into my arms and darted into the house. Thankfully, they had a fire going, and I laid her on the couch closest to it. Everyone else followed into the house, and started putting things away. Esme approached me first, and I melted into her embrace. She had always been a mother to me, and I was ashamed and in pain. The Denali clan moved to the kitchen to give us some time as a family.
"I'm glad you've come back to us Edward, and that you've brought Bella. Everything is going to work out, just promise me you will stay." She took my head into her hands and kissed me on the forehead. "I cannot bear to lose any of my children." I nodded to convey my understanding. She joined Carlisle, who was checking on Bella, and knelt on the floor beside her. I watched as she murmured to my love and stroked her hand.
Rose scowled at me Idiot. Emmett clasped my arm in a show a support before following her to whichever room she had taken off to. Welcome back, bro.
The Denali vampires were worried about Bella, and our family, wondering what they could do to help, or if they should stay out of the way. I went into the kitchen to greet them.
"Thank you all for your hospitality in opening your home to our family. I apologize for any strife I may have caused." Afraid to look them in the eye, I feigned interest in the pattern of the table runner.
Tanya spoke first . "Edward." And she swept me up in a hug. Irina and Kate followed with their own embraces. "You know you and yours are always welcome here. Bella will be back to herself in no time and things will get better." Though if they don't.... I held back a glare and looked away. Tanya had made no secrets of her attraction to me, and I felt guilty for rejecting her advances. Bella was the only woman for me, and I hoped Tanya would be able to accept that.
Carmen pulled me into a hug, and Eleazar grasped my arm. "We'll do whatever we can to help. We're here to offer our love and support. You are all a part of our family too."
"Thank you." I told them all sincerely, before heading back to Bella. I sat on the couch and pulled her into my lap once again, brushing a couple loose strands of her hair away from her face.
"Such tenderness and love, mi amor,surely they will overcome this." I heard Carmen murmur to her mate.
"We prepared the guest room for Bella. There is a comfortable bed and it has it's own bathroom. I'm not sure what else you may need for her, but please don't hesitate to ask. Esme and I have already stocked the kitchen with food, so as soon as she is able to eat, we'll be happy to prepare something." Kate paused and turned to Carlisle. "Will she wake soon?"
"She should wake in the next few hours, so we should probably get her settled. I will warn you all, I do not know what kind of emotional state she will be in when she wakes. Alice, Edward, and I will be in the room with her, and we should be able to handle whatever arises. Jasper, if you wouldn't mind lending your talents should we need them?"
Jasper nodded. "Of course."
"Thank you all for everything, please let us know how we can repay you." Carlisle started up to the second level where the guest bedroom was. Alice and Jasper took our things, while I followed with Bella.
The lodge consisted of a two story open living area that took up most of the house. There was a huge stone fireplace against the north wall. The rock mantle held an assortment of ancient artifacts. To the untrained eye, they were simply decoration, but considering the occupants of this house had roamed the earth for a thousand years, they were anything but. On the south side, there was a small kitchen, library, and two bedrooms tucked under the second level behind the stairs. Upstairs there were four more bedrooms, and two bathrooms. It was a simple design, but warm and open.
The guest room was upstairs on the right, and had a soft queen sized bed made up with lavender sheets, and a purple flowered quilt. Carlisle pulled the covers back and I set her down gently in the center of the bed, before tucking them back in around her. Then I sat beside her.
Alice was fluttering around unpacking, hanging up and folding Bella's clothes. She pulled out a pair of royal blue flannel pajamas and set them on the bed, then hung a fluffy velour robe on the door to the bathroom. I noticed she had picked up boots and a warm coat, along with all the accessories she would need for freezing temperatures. Alice truly thought of everything Bella might need. She went into the bathroom with another bag, and stocked all the toiletries, including Bella's favorite strawberry shampoo. No one could ask for a better sister.
Carlisle laid a syringe on the table next to me, and I knew it was in case we needed to sedate her again. I winced and hoped it would be unnecessary. He left for a moment, and came back with a glass of water as she would surely be thirsty when she woke up. Then he double checked his bag, wanting to make sure he had thought of everything. There is no way to prepare for the unknown, and we would just have to wait and see. Between the two of us, we should be able to handle it. Carlisle has studied and practiced medicine for over three hundred years now, and I held two medical degrees. The house was silent, anticipation thrumming through the air. Alice curled up on the love seat in the corner with Jasper, and Carlisle sat with Esme on the other side of Bella.
We waited.
I kept running the different scenarios through my head of how she might react when she woke. Panic set in when I thought of her rejecting me, I couldn't live without her. I had tried, and failed miserably.
Bella's breathing became uneven and her her face began to scrunch up, her eyelids fluttering. Carlisle looked up, and Jasper and Esme too their cue to leave, closing the door behind them. They both remained outside in the hall.
Carlisle looked at me. Talk to her.
I steadied myself, and leaned down to whisper in her ear. "Bella, love, it's time to wake up now. Please, open your eyes, I haven't seen them in so long. Come on love, you're safe, wake up."
"Edward?" She mumbled.
"Yes love, I'm right here." I stroked her cheek. She felt the coolness of my skin and pressed her head into my hand slightly.
"I was right." She whispered with a small smile. "You are an angel."
"Bella, open your eyes, love. I'm not an angel. I'm here with you."
Her brow creased in confusion. Slowly, she opened her eyes, and blinked away the heaviness of sleep. She sucked in a quick gasp, and her eyes darted around the room, searching for some clue.
"Carlisle? Alice? Then I'm not...."
"No my love, you're safe."
"Hey Bella, I've missed you." Alice trilled, stroking her leg through the covers.
"Bella, can you tell me how you feel?" Carlisle asked.
"Confused?"
"Well that's to be expected. Do you hurt anywhere?"
She stretched a little, and lifted her limbs, turned her head. "A little sore all over, worse in my wrists...oh god..." Her face contorted and silent tears slid down her cheeks. She took in a ragged breath and sobs began to rip through her body. As reality crashed down on her, she curled up on her side. I laid down beside her and rubbed her back, my forehead resting on the pillow inches from hers.
"It's ok love, let it out. We don't have to talk about it now." I murmured.
At the sound of my voice, her sobs broke off abruptly. Now she would realize I was here for her, that I'd never leave her. I opened my mouth to tell her I loved her, but her eyes flew open as she shrugged my arm off of her. "Get. Off. Me." She spat through gritted teeth.
As much as I thought I had prepared for this reaction, her words cut right through me like steel. Her rejection was agony, and I fought the urge to run from the room. Not until she tells me to go. I have to prove I'm here to stay. I sat up on the edge of the bed, my fingers gripped into the side of the bed. I had to remind myself to loosen my grip before I ripped chunks out of the mattress. She turned over, her back to me. The silence was unbearable. After what seemed like an eternity, she took a few ragged, deep breaths and looked up at Carlisle.
"What happened?"
"Are you sure you want to do this now?" He asked.
"Actually...I need to use the bathroom first." She struggled to push herself up and winced at the pain as the stitches pulled at her wrists.
Carlisle grabbed her in order to keep her from hurting herself further. "Bella, stop. You'll need help." He looked at Alice.
"I'll take her. Come on Bella, I'm going to carry you, you're probably still pretty weak." She scooped Bella up effortlessly in her arms and carried her to the bathroom. After Alice had settled her back into the bed with pillows behind her, Carlisle handed her the glass of water.
"This will help the pain." He said as he pressed a pill into her hand. She shook her head. "Bella, don't be difficult. I know you are in pain, please, take it." She reluctantly swallowed the pill.
"Now tell me what happened." She demanded.
Carlisle hesitated, unsure of how much to tell her. "A few days ago Alice had a vision. She saw what you had planned, and we...Alice, Jasper, and I...got back to Forks as fast as we could to try to stop you. Thankfully, Edward was closer and he got to the river right before you were swept away. He pulled you out. Alice and Jasper arrived as he was taking you back to the house. Edward stitched up your wounds, and waited for me. We had to give you a transfusion, but you are on your way to being well now. A couple days of rest and good food and you will be fine."
He watched her intently, gaging how much more she could handle. Bella was staring at the foot of the bed, soaking in all the information, no hint of emotion on her face, she was eerily calm. When she realized he wasn't continuing, she looked up at him.
"Then what? Where are we?"
"Bella, we had to make some quick decisions without consulting you, and I apologize for that. Keep in mind that you had left a letter for Charlie, and the ground near the river was soaked in your blood. He would have known what you had done. Even if we managed to hide everything, the wounds would have taken weeks to heal. If anyone had seen you, things would have been very bad for us all. I probably don't have to tell you that you would have been hospitalized. You would have been drugged up, under constant watch. My family would have been interrogated, and our presence would have been extremely suspicious."
Bella was quiet for a long time, before taking a deep breath. "So you let them believe that I was dead."
Carlisle nodded. "You had made it very clear in the past that you wished to be one of us, Alice's visions consistently showed us that you would be one day, so we made the decision. I regret that we didn't have the opportunity to discuss this with you first. If we had waited any longer, Charlie would have shown up at our house."
"Where are we?"
"Denali, you remember us telling you about the other coven like ours that lives in Alaska?"
She nodded, thoughtful for a moment. "Why?"
"We thought it was far enough away..."
"No." She interrupted, her voice cracking with emotion. "Why did you save me?"
My heart shattered, and I whirled to her, agony etched into my face. "Because I can't live without you Bella. You are my life."
Pure venom laced her voice. "But you don't want me Edward. I'm no good for you. You left me. You all did." She glared at Alice.
I reached for her and she pulled away. "Bella, what I told you was lies, all lies. As if I could ever want anyone other than you. I left because I wanted you to have a normal, human life. I hoped that if you thought I had moved on, that you would too. I know now that I was wrong, so horribly wrong, and I almost lost you."
"You did lose me Edward."
"No Bella, please. Don't shut me out, let me prove to you that I am never going to leave your side again. Please, I love you." I whispered. "I can't bear to live without you any longer. I'm so sorry love, for the rest of my existence I will never forgive myself. I need you."
I was pleading now, begging. I would give my life a thousand times over to keep her safe. If only she would let me back into her heart. I didn't know what to do. Of course, I had hurt her, beyond that I'd obliterated everything we had together. How could I gain her trust again?
"Carlisle, I need to be alone right now" Her voice was shaky.
"I'm sorry Bella, but no. One of us will always be with you. I'll let you decide who stays."
She grimaced as understanding flashed across her face. "Oh you think I..." She shook her head. "You."
I could see the hurt on Alice's face as Bella made her decision. My pain echoed hers a thousand times, but I left the room quietly, and landed in Esme's motherly embrace. I sank to the ground as she held me to her chest and rocked me. Alice and Jasper sat beside us.
"Give her some time Edward. She loves you." Esme murmured.