A/N - Hii, thanks again for the lovely reviews, I'm writing to everyone now! I'm honestly still so surprised at peoples reaction to this story, its amazing. Just hoping that it keeps up, thanks again though!

So yeah, here's the third chapter, and the one thats got me the most nervous so far... I'm really worried people won't like it. But yeah, I had to post it at some point, so here goes nothing, eh?

If you do like this chapter, please review!

"You don't know about my past.
And I don't have a future figured out.
And maybe this is gone too fast.
And maybe it's not meant to last,

But what do you say to taking chances,
What do you say to jumping off the edge?
And never knowing if there's solid ground below.
Or a hand to hold. Or hell to pay.

What do you say? What do you say?
I just wanna start again,
Maybe you can show me how to try.
Maybe you could take me in,
Somewhere underneath your skin."

Fearless

Chapter three

The more I got to know Edward, the more I wanted to know.

I learnt the important things, such as the date of his birthday, and about his family… that Emmett was his twin (something that surprised me,) and that Alice was their younger sister, and a junior. I learnt that he had moved here during the summer because his parents Carlisle and Esme felt that small town life would suit them better. He told me that Alice and Emmett ended up befriending Rosalie and Jasper, whom he felt didn't like him very much, which was something I was surprised at – who wouldn't like Edward if they got to know him?

I knew that I did… more then I should.

We kept up our routine of hanging out at lunch, whether we were in the library or the cafeteria on my infamous table; we always spent it together. I knew that secrets were kept… I hadn't yet mustered up the confidence to ask him how he ended up blind, and also hadn't told him the real reason why I came to Forks. I hadn't actually told him much, just that I was an only child, and that my parents split up when I was four causing me to move to Phoenix with my mom Renee until a year ago.

But it didn't seem like any of that really mattered. It didn't feel like we were keeping up some sort of pretence everytime we spoke, or spent time together… no, it felt different then that.

I couldn't quite figure out what it was that I was feeling, all I knew was that I had never felt this way about anyone…

Well, only one person came close, but he's gone now, and I refuse to let myself cry yet again… because Edward's near me.

He was once again standing with his family at the lockers, but as I approached, Alice nudged him and told him I was here – something she had been doing for the past week and a half. He then looked up, like he normally did, and turned his head in my direction, and almost like he could actually see me… that beautiful smile would grace his face as he held his hand out for me.

I interlaced my fingers with his, squeezing them once – another of our new routines.

He smiled wider, and turned so he was leaning against the locker facing me, "Hey," he whispered.

"Hey yourself," I grinned, "you okay?"

He shrugged slightly, his smile soft - "I'm better now, you?"

"Same," I whispered. "Did you have a good weekend?" I asked – it was Monday after all, two days since I had last seen him.

He shrugged slightly, "Yeah… it wasn't bad, except for my mom's dinner party that is," he muttered.

I raised my eyebrow, "Oh yeah?" I asked, hinting at an explanation.

His smile turned crooked, "Yeah, she had me as her official food taster- I lost count of how many casseroles I had to eat," he muttered bitterly, though I could detect humour somewhere in his voice.

I cringed at the thought of that though, "Casserole…? Yuck." I scrunched up my face in disgust.

He laughed quietly, "my thoughts exactly," he murmured, running his free hand through his dishevelled hair.

… I ignored the sudden urge I had to replace his hand for my own.

"What about you?" Edward asked quietly, his attention back on me, "did you do much this weekend?"

I also shrugged, "Studied a little, preparing for the dreaded Biology exam this week," I told him vaguely.

He gasped quietly, "Ah… I completely forgot about that!"

I laughed slightly, nudging his side gently with my elbow, "Me too, until Saturday… so, want to continue with our study sessions?" I asked him hopefully.

He grinned, "Yes, definitely… want to go to the library for lunch again then?"

I was just about to answer when a loud throat clearing stopped me – I glanced over Edward's shoulder to see Alice smiling at us.

"Sorry about that," she apologised, "but I was just going to ask if you wanted to sit with us at lunch today?"

The suggestion clearly looked appealing to Edward, but I was dubious… I didn't know any of these people save for Edward, and I'll admit that I didn't intend too… these people seemed intimidating.

But, they were friends and family of Edward's… I knew that saying no would probably hurt him. He would obviously want a change of just spending lunch with me… he was probably desperate for more interesting company.

"Erm, sure, sounds good," I agreed.

Alice grinned, and Edward gave me a grateful smile, temporarily making me confident about this decision… well, until I caught sight of Rosalies expression that is. She was staring at me, not with a curious expression… but with outright hostility, like she didn't trust me…

Or more like she hated me.

I flinched, not used to an emotion like that being directed at me… because until now everyone had always ignored me, and for all I knew they didn't hate me at all… well, that was what I liked to tell myself. I had never and still didn't cope well with being hated. And all the times that I stayed in the shadows I didn't have to deal with that, because everyone was oblivious to me, they didn't care at all.

So now that I was coming out of the shadows, I wonder - is it worth it?

I glanced around at everyone noticing how they were deep in conversation – Alice was jumping up and down excitedly clapping her hands, while Jasper smiled down at her. Emmett was laughing along, while Rosalie… well her expression was still icy, but she seemed to be contributing to what they were saying at least.

I sighed sadly, thinking for just one split moment that none of this was worth it, and that maybe I should go back to the way I was… when Edward stopped those thoughts.

His hand squeezed mine gently, so I turned to look at him, noticing for the first time that he wasn't involved in the conversation either… he was acting like an outsider like I was.

He smiled down at me, "want to go for a walk before class?" he asked me quietly.

"Yes!" I instantly replied, before realising that my response was probably a little too enthusiastic.

He didn't seem to notice though, as he only continued to smile, and tugged me gently along with him, saying goodbye to the rest of the group as we began walking hand in hand.

I lead him outside; secretly loving the fact that he was comfortable with me… that he trusted me not to get him lost, or lead him astray. We walked slowly across the grass, heading towards where I knew his first class was.

I smiled as the warm breeze ran through my hair, "It's sunny today," I whispered gently, going into another of our routines- me explaining the weather that is. I smiled up at him, "you can probably feel the warmth right?"

He nodded, his expression the happiest I had ever seen it, "Mm, it's nice," he murmured.

"It is," I agreed, before sighing, "The winters coming though, so I'm not expecting many more days like this."

"It doesn't matter," he whispered softly, squeezing my hand. "Because before we know it, it'll be summer again, and then…" he trailed off.

"Graduation… and then college…" I finished his sentence gently.

He nodded, his expression tightening, "Yeah…"

"Are you applying for anywhere?" I asked curiously, as our pace slowed.

He thought through what he was going to say, and when he did speak his voice was surprisingly soft - "I don't know… how do I know anywhere would even accept me? And I know that if I do go that I'll need someone to help me around, and I don't want to be a burden…"

I cut him off sharply, "You are not a burden," I told him, "You'll never be a burden," I whispered, shocked that he would ever think that.

He nodded, but didn't make a comment on what I had said… he didn't actually say anything.

I hated seeing him so disheartened, so I spoke what I thought was the truth in an attempt to help him feel more positive - "I think you should apply," I whispered, "You're just as smart as everyone else, if not smarter… and with everything considered that is pretty amazing. Any college that rejects you, isn't worth going to… at least that's what I think."

We had stopped walking by that point, and his face was surprised as it faced in my direction, "You really think that?" he asked breathlessly, his voice incredulous.

I nodded, "Of course I do," I told him, sincerity ringing out in my voice.

My words clearly had some huge effect on him, as he did something that completely surprised me… he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into a gentle hug, burying his face into my hair.

I was completely still for a moment, not expecting this at all. And then I tried to remember the last time I'd had contact like this with anyone… it was a long time ago - a year to be exact.

My fears were increasing… I didn't want to lose this feeling. I didn't want to end up broken again, and opening myself… I knew that I was possibly setting myself up for a fall.

But the brave side of me argued – who cares? I had never felt anything as strong, as wonderful as this…

… And I wouldn't give up this feeling for the world.

And so, I returned the hug just as tightly, resting my head on his shoulder, breathing in his soft, sweet scent. It was unlike anything I had ever smelt before… it was him… it was perfect.

I felt him press his nose gently into my hair, and then his lips replace them - "You're such a good friend to me, you know that?" he whispered sweetly, squeezing me to him.

"I do," I whispered back, "… and the feelings mutual, believe me. You're my best friend," I told him; ignoring the warning bells those two words set off in my mind.

… Because I wanted to enjoy this moment, for just a little longer.

"When I fall asleep leave my door open just a crack, Please take me away from here,
'Cause I feel like such an insomniac, Please take me away from here,
Why do I tire of counting sheep? Please take me away from here…
When I'm far too tired to fall asleep.

To ten million fireflies, I'm weird 'cause I hate goodbyes,
I got misty eyes as they said farewell…
but I'll know where several are, if my dreams get real bizarre,
'cause I saved a few and I keep them in a jar.

I fall asleep… I'd like to make myself believe that planet earth turns slowly…
It's hard to say that I'd rather stay awake when I'm asleep,
Because my dreams are bursting at the seams."

It was a stormy night tonight – just like I thought it would be. It meant that the warm, sunny weather was over, and that the winter was truly coming. Isn't that what storms usually symbolised anyway? … That the heat, the weather, the earth must shift… and come crashing back down at some point, because nothing can last forever.

It took me a long time to fall asleep… the thunder was loud, and the lightening kept erupting my room in a bright light, that was hard to ignore. I tried everything I could short from counting sheep, and eventually after an hour or so I became unaware of what was happening and drifted into a uncomfortable sleep… uncomfortable because of how real my dreams felt.

It was like they were actually happening… I could almost smell the change in the air, and hear the crowds around me, and feel the sensations on my fingertips… and for now… tonight, this dream was real.

… The crowds were increasing; the dull place I was standing in only became even greyer, seeming dark as I stood alone, listening to the announcements being made over a speaker. I couldn't hear exactly what was being said, but somehow knew the message… I knew what was happening.

I began walking forward, shoving my way past people as best I could to little avail. Something was pulling me forward, I didn't know what it was… but knew that I couldn't stop.

As I was shoved backwards once again, I finally felt ready to give up… to just turn around. But then suddenly, like the sound of a wave crashing the crowd parted, allowing me the sight of someone.

I could tell who it was… even from this distance. His smile was brilliant, and he had the most stunning green eyes… that seemed to be shining as he spotted me.

It was Edward.

He could see me.

"Bella," he whispered softly – his voice clear over the crowd despite the quiet volume.

He began walking towards me, his walk confident and brave – he wasn't afraid of the crowds, and certainly knew where he was going without his restrictions.

"Edward," I breathed, as I began a sprint towards him, finding that I was suddenly no longer afraid – the crowds were gone, and we were now outside, in the brilliant bright sunshine.

We were only a few feet away, literally a couple of steps… so, so close, almost close enough to touch… when it happened.

The white light appeared in front of me, blinding my vision, as a horrible squealing sound filled my ears… a sound that was almost like screaming. I placed my hand over my ears, but was unable to block out the loud crashing sound, despite my best efforts.

Everything suddenly turned into agony… I opened my eyes to darkness, to a smashed windscreen… I started screaming for Edward, looking around frantically, and praying that he was okay.

Please, someone… let him be okay.

Only, as I turned my head, I noticed the dark figure next to me… and it wasn't Edward, I was certain of that. I reached my shaking hands up, rubbing the dark liquid away that was covering my eyes.

And then as my vision cleared I finally realised.

It was Jacob next to me.

My first, my true best friend.

His eyes were barely open, as he told me to run… to get away… I refused of course, as I desperately tried to help him in any way that I could. I ran my hands over his face, making sure his beautiful, dark eyes were clear for me to see.

Only as I cleared them once again, his face was suddenly wiped clean. His expression suddenly turned angry or hurt even as he whispered –

"Tell him the truth."

I shot up clutching my chest, trying to calm my breaths and the tears that were now running down my face. I blinked several times, trying to remember where I was and what was happening.

Eventually things became clear and I realised… I was in my bedroom in Fork's, it was now Tuesday morning. And I had just dreamt of something that had happened… and something that might possibly never happen.

It was the first time I had dreamt of Edward, but certainly not the first time Jacob had appeared in my dreams. I had dreamt of the ending scenario many, many times in the past year, how could I not after all? But it was the first time Jacob had said those four words to me.

And the way I heard them… it really was like he was talking to me.

I looked out of my window at the rain that was pouring down – figures. The sunshine had gone even quicker then I had thought. That didn't matter though - because today I was going to do something positive, something I'd never done.

… And that was to tell the complete truth of what happened that night a year ago.

Edward may hate me, or he might just understand… it was a gamble, but I knew I had to take it. This was a part of my past, and would always be a part of me; there was no way we could continue with this friendship now until I told him about this.

I made my way to school with a clearer, determined mind. The horror of the dream was pushed back, and instead I smiled as I considered the possibility that this could help in the healing process. I had never told anyone in detail what had happened, Edward would be the first – and I knew it would be a relief to finally say it out loud.

So, instead of facing another day at the lunch table with Alice's gossip, and Rosalie's ice cold glare, I just asked Edward if we could meet alone… so that I could get this over with.

I lead him to a bench that faced the forest – it was secluded enough that no one would over hear our conversation, but also wasn't too far of a walk in case I had to help him back all of a sudden.

… If he decided to hate me after I told him that is.

I took in a shuddering breath, nervous all of a sudden, knowing that there was no way I could back out now. "I have something to tell you," I whispered, unable to look at him.

"Yeah, I kind of guessed that," Edward whispered, reaching for my hand. "It's okay, you know. Whatever it is, just tell me."

"It's not that easy," I whispered sadly, squeezing his hand once as he threaded out fingers together. "I've tried so hard to hold this story in… but I feel like I'm going to burst if I don't tell someone…" I trailed off, watching the trees gently sway in the breeze. The rain had cleared slightly now, but the clouds were thick – I knew it wouldn't be long until the rain started again.

Edward moved slightly closer to me, "It'll be okay," he whispered soothingly, rubbing his thumb over my knuckles.

"Okay…" I breathed, knowing that I had no choice now. He was my friend… and at the same time he was so much more then that… he was slowly becoming everything to me.

… And he deserved the truth.

"I didn't come to Fork's to spend time with my dad," I told him shakily. "A-About a year ago, I, we were in an accident… I…" I cut off, aware of how badly my voice was shaking.

Edward let go of my hand, and moved his arm to rest around my shoulder… it was nice, soothing. "It's fine," he whispered, his breath warm on my neck.

He was calming me, but ultimately telling the story still devastated me - "It's not… It was my fault Edward! If I just focused, he would still be here…" I sobbed.

"Who would?" Edward frowned in confusion.

"Jacob… my best friend," I whispered sadly, "I killed him, Edward. I killed my best friend!"

Next chapter = Bella's back-story. Once that is out we'll get on to the happier/more romantic stuff… just after a little more angst that is. There's a tiny little bit of foreshadowing in this chapter for all those that like those kind of things (I know I always have when reading stories!)

So yeah, still so many questions to be answered. All to be done very soon now! I'm surprised, but this story is actually fitting in really well to my outline… I'm almost certain this story will be 10 chapters now. 11 possibly. It will be complete very soon!

So yeah, please review! And thanks for reading… Emma.x