From the Files of Dr. Dumbledore
The Case of Harry P., Week 7
Harry's hallucinations are, if possible, growing even more vivid and intense. I sense that he is approaching some sort of psychological crisis, and perhaps a resolution as well.
Harry is preparing to leave the Dursleys for good. Unexpectedly, Dudley expresses gratitude towards Harry for saving his life. Aunt Petunia is hesitant; there appears to be something she wants to say to Harry, but she cannot bring herself to say it.
Dudley and Harry are becoming friendly, are they? My impression is that this is happening in the world outside the hallucinations as well. Harry's quest for a better self-understanding has, I think, alleviated his jealousy towards his brother to some extent.
I wonder what it was that Aunt Petunia was about to say? I suspect that her alter ego, Lily, has a great deal to tell Harry as well, if only she could overcome that which holds her back. What is it that makes her pause, I wonder? Shame? Love? Dread?
In order to deceive the waiting death eaters and allow Harry to escape unharmed, six of his friends drink Polyjuice potion and are transformed into exact copies of Harry. The death eaters attack, looking for the real Harry among the copies, but Harry himself is able to escape. He defends himself using the Expelliarmus spell that disarms without harming the opponent. Then Voldemort himself appears and tries to kill Harry. But he can't; Harry is magically protected by his wand, whose core is identical to Voldemort's. But Hedwig, Harry's white owl, is killed. George Weasley loses an ear to Snape, and Mad-Eye Moody is slain.
Ah, which one is the real Harry? And for that matter, which one is the real Lily, or the real James? Things are not what they seem to be…
How curious that Harry does not want to harm the death eaters, and how even more inconceivable that he does not wish to harm Voldemort himself! Why not fire off a killing curse, Harry? Expelliarmus? Why do you want to expel the Dark Lord, rather than destroy him? Why do you want to protect Voldemort?
Is Harry himself the Dark Lord? The core of Harry's wand is identical to Voldemort's. Is the core of their beings identical as well?
Harry grieves over the tragic loss of his snow-white bird, Hedwig. The bird is a frequent symbol of the soul in many cultures; does Hedwig symbolize Harry's soul as well? If so, what does it mean that she is killed?
Snape severs George Weasley's ear. How very odd! Why is George maimed in this manner? More and more characters in this hallucination bear their suffering imprinted on their bodies: My hand is withered, Moody has lost an eye and a leg, Draco carries the mark of Voldemort on his arm, Umbridge's "lines" are inscribed in blood on Harry's hand, George has lost an ear, and Harry has the scar on his forehead. But the real-world Harry has a scar too, the trace of past suffering on his living, breathing body. What caused that scar?
They learn of the contents of Dumbledore's will. Dumbledore has left Harry a snitch and the sword of Gryffindor. Harry suspects that the snitch hides a secret inside, but he can't open it. Ron gets a deluminator, a magical device that can turn lights on, and Hermione a book written in ancient runes, The Tales of Beedle of Bard.
Aha! The snitch, that ultimate goal for the seeker, hides a secret inside! What better symbol for the truth we are both seeking through our journey together, Harry? The golden snitch with the concealed secret is reminiscent, of course, of the golden egg with the riddle inside – the egg that Harry could open only when he returned to the symbolic womb of the waters. Most suggestive!
Ron, Harry's impulsive and emotional doppelganger, may yet become illuminated by Dumbledore, as may his intellectual side, represented by Hermione. There must be something significant in the book she is given… We will see!
Bill and Fleur get married, and Harry attends the wedding in disguise. Remus Lupin has already married Nymphadora Tonks. Harry, Ron, and Hermione flee from the death eaters and end up going into hiding at Grimmauld Place. They learn from the house-elf Kreacher that Umbridge has the true locket.
A double bridal couple – and yet Harry only talks about one wedding. What happened to the other wedding? It is passed over in remarkable silence. Perhaps the two couples are one and the same? The groom is a werewolf, and the bride is a flower, a nymph. Is Harry reflecting on his parents' relationship, perhaps? The werewolf Lupin represents, I believe, an aspect of Harry's own father, and perhaps Bill does as well. Bill-Remus-James and Fleur-Nymphadora-Lily. Does this imaginary wedding indicate that Harry is learning to accept his parents' relationship, recognizing that James and Lily belong with each other? Is he moving beyond his oedipal rivalry with his father?
Umbridge, Lily's dark shadow, has the locket, he tells me. Lily has the locket,and I would dearly like to know whose portrait is hidden within.
They are able to steal the locket, but they can't open it. The Horcrux begins to have a destructive effect on the three friends. Ron decides to leave Harry and Hermione.
The mystery of the locket destroys those who get near it… Harry loses the Ron part of himself to the terrifying secret, but Hermione, his intellect, still remains his ally. Can his own innate intelligence help him conquer the darkness he faces?
At Christmas, Harry and Hermione go to Godric's Hollow and visit his parents' graves. They see his parents' old friend Bathilda Bagshot, but she is not what she seems; she is Nagini, the serpent, and they are barely able to escape alive. As they flee, Harry's wand is broken.
It is dangerous to visit the landscape of the past, apparently! Your parents' innocent friend can turn into a serpent… I wonder what lies beneath this startling image?
Godric's Hollow – what a remarkable name! Godric is one of the Hogwarts founders, I believe, Godric Gryffindor? He is the good founder, as opposed to the malevolent Slytherin. How odd, then, that Godric is hollow…
Harry's wand is broken? Oh, dear, in that case I hope I was mistaken about the phallic symbolism of the wand…!
In Harry's fantasy world, the wand appears to be an extension of the person. Is it Harry himself who is broken? But if the wand signifies the person, how are we to understand the relationship of Harry's wand to Voldemort's? Does the strange identity of their wands symbolize the unity of the two persons as well?
Harry and Hermione read startling revelations about Dumbledore's past. They thought that Dumbledore had defeated the dark wizard Grindelwald, but now they learn that Dumbledore and Grindelwald were inseparable friends, until a tragedy drove them apart: The untimely death of Dumbledore's sister.
Well, well, well! I am a man of mystery, aren't I? (I am happy to record that my sister Gertrude is actually alive and well in her little cottage in Wales, and as ferocious and formidable as ever…)
A new dark wizard has appeared in Harry's hallucinations, another Voldemort. One for me, and one for him, I assume? Ah, well, we are in this together! Grindelwald – the name is undoubtedly inspired by the serpentine fiend Grendel from the story of Beowulf. But apparently, I am no dragon slayer, but a friend to the monster. How very interesting! What about Harry, I wonder? Is he a secret friend to his monstrous enemy as well?
Harry and Hermione are hiding in the forest. Harry follows a silver doe patronus, which leads him to the lake where the true sword of Gryffindor lies hidden. Ron returns, and they try to destroy the locket. But Ron is affected by the locket. A fleeting form of Tom Riddle appears from the Horcrux and taunts Ron, suggesting that Hermione loves Harry, and that Ron's own mother would have preferred Harry over him. But they are able to destroy the Horcrux in the end.
Even the sword of Gryffindor has a doppelganger! But how do you tell the true one from the copy? The same way Voldemort could tell the true Harry from his polyjuiced copies, perhaps? The real one is blessed with love, with compassion, which the false double does not possess…?
A silver doe? Harry has an unknown protector, someone who watches over him. I am reminded of Snape's promise to Narcissa to watch over her son… Is he watching over Harry for Lily as well? No wait, Snape was a murderer, wasn't he? Can a man be both a murderer and a protector?
Poor Ron, so desperately jealous! Is this Harry's jealousy of his little brother that rears its head again, or is this something different? Tom Riddle… How interesting: The golden egg hides a riddle, and the silver locket a Riddle… Tom Riddle is the one behind Ron's sudden feeling of jealousy. Voldemort's fragmented soul lives on inside the locket Horcrux. I wonder whose portrait I would see if I could look inside the locket Lily has around her neck? Voldemort's? Yes, perhaps I would finally see the face of Voldemort…
They visit Luna's father, the odd Xenophilius Lovegood. Lovegood tells them the Tale of the Three Brothers, the story from Hermione's book. The three brothers meet Death himself and receive three magical gifts: The Resurrection Stone, the Elder Wand, and the Invisibility Cloak. These are the Deathly Hallows. But Lovegood has betrayed them to the death eaters to save the life of his daughter, Luna. Harry, Ron, and Hermione are able to escape at the last minute.
The Deathly Hallows? Hallow, as in saint, a blessed dead person? Who, or what, are these Hallows? The three blessed ones – are they another representation of the recurring trinity of mother, father, and son? But why do they encounter Death?
And then there is Xenophilius. Xenophilius, "the one who loves the strange". A suitable name for an eccentric man! Or perhaps his name can be translated instead "the one who loves a stranger"? But why would a parent who loves a stranger betray someone to the death eaters to save his child's life? Very odd, indeed.
Everyone else fears uttering Voldemort's name, but Harry follows Dumbledore's example and calls the Dark Lord by his true name. But the very name is cursed, and when Harry utters it, the death eaters arrive.
They all fear uttering Voldmort's true name. He Who Must Not Be Named. Why must he not be named? But some part of Harry is willing to do it, to utter the dread name of the shadowy figure whose face Lily conceals within the locket.
You are right Harry, I don't care if the name is cursed. I want you to utter Voldemort's real name, Harry, no matter what the dreadful consequences are.
They are imprisoned in the dungeon of Malfoy Manor. Hermione is tortured by Bellatrix. But Harry has a mirror, and he uses the mirror to call out to Dumbledore. No, not Dumbledore, Dumbledore is dead; but to another Dumbledore, his double.
Ah! I have a doppelganger, too! Good, I was beginning to feel left out, among all these characters with dark shadow selves! Hmmm. I believe the only character in Harry's delusions without a dark double at this point is the inimitable Miss McGonagall! Ah, the amazing, wonderfully singular McGonagall! There can be only one of her in any world, real or imagined, bless her!
Harry's mind and Voldemort's are one; he can see Voldemort stealing the Elder Wand from Dumbledore's tomb. Harry, Ron, and Hermione are not above a little robbery themselves; Hermione uses Polyjuice potion to transform into Bellatrix, and they break into Gringotts and steal a Horcrux, the Cup of Hufflepuff, hidden in Bellatrix' vault.
Oh, how difficult it is not to get lost in the Freudian paradise of the womb symbols of the cup and the vault! But I must resist the Master's voice, for I believe there is something else that is more significant here: Bellatrix is hiding the cup. Perhaps her double, Lily, is hiding a cup as well. But Harry finds it. He has discovered the secret. What is it that he has discovered, I wonder?
Harry, Ron, and Hermione flee on a dragon and arrive in Hogsmeade, but the death eaters are after them. They are rescued by Dumbledore's brother, Aberforth, who tells them the true story of Ariana, Dumbledore's lost sister, and his possible complicity in her death. Who caused her death – Dumbledore or Grindelwald? It is impossible to tell.
Harry has been projecting his battle with his own dark enemy onto me. If I may have caused the death of the innocent, does that hold true for Harry as well, I wonder?
Students and staff at Hogwarts prepare for the final battle against Voldemort and his death eaters, as Harry searches for the last Horcruxes. Ron and Hermione are able to destroy the cup. Harry discovers that Ravenclaw's diadem is a Horcrux as well, but the diadem is destroyed by Fiendfyre. As the battle rages, Fred, Lupin, and Tonks are killed. Lupin and Tonks' young son, Teddy, is left an orphan.
Fred? You can't be serious, Harry! I have grown so fond of the Fred and George characters! Why does Fred have to die? That doesn't make any sense at all!
Lupin and Tonks – well, they do represent Lily and James after all, don't they, so of course they have to die, just like the James and Lily in Harry's delusions. But they leave behind a small son, Teddy, an orphan who will be raised by relatives, a new Harry…
Voldemort kills Snape. But the dying Snape reveals his secret to Harry: He loved Lily, and tried to protect Harry for her sake. He was a murderer, but the murder was both necessary and inevitable, committed for the sake of the greater good. He reveals to Harry that there is one last Horcrux: Harry himself. The last piece of Voldemort's soul lives on within Harry.
Ah! Snape's secret! I knew my Hogwarts self trusted Snape for a good reason! How satisfying to learn that I am not losing my grip. So, Snape is another one of Lily's admirers, is he? And Snape is willing to murder for her sake, and for Harry's? Who is this elusive Snape, this homicidal protector? Someone who loved Lily… Reggie Black? James? Or someone else altogether? And how can a murder be committed for the sake of good?
Harry realizes that since he and Voldemort are one, he must die as well. He goes unarmed and alone to meet Voldemort. As he goes towards his death, he comes upon the snitch, and now he understands what it will take to unlock its secret: He tells the snitch that he is about to die. And the snitch opens miraculously, and reveals a stone within: The resurrection stone. But Harry does not use the stone to resurrect the dead; he goes to meet death instead, with the shadows of the dead by his side, to comfort him. And then he meets Voldmort, and the Dark Lord kills him with the dreaded curse Avada Kedavra…
Voldemort kills Harry? What? Death. Death unlocks the secret. What does this mean? Whose death?
But Harry wakes up in a curious world betwixt and between. He finds himself naked, but he no longer has a scar; he is whole again. Nearby, there is a terrifying creature, a monstrous, deformed child. It is Voldmort; it is the part of the Dark Lord that lived in Harry.
Curiouser and curiouser! Harry is undergoing a strange rebirth… What does this mean? And why is Voldemort a baby? Is Harry somehow returning to the very beginning here? To the time before he got his scar?
And then Dumbledore appears…
Aha! Wouldn't you know it!
…and Dumbledore explains that Harry is not dead after all. Harry finds himself back at King's Cross Station, the place where he first began his journey to Hogwarts. Harry must choose: to take the train to some unknown destination, or to return to the real world. He chooses to go back to face Voldemort.
I am proud of you, Harry! You had a choice between jumping on another imaginary train or meeting Voldmort face to face, and you chose to let the train go. You are ready to return to reality, I believe, as soon as you are able to face that final challenge.
And then Harry meets Voldemort. Voldemort utters the killing curse, but Harry responds with "Expelliarmus". Voldemort possesses the unbeatable Elder Wand, but Harry is its true master. Voldemort's killing curse rebounds, and he dies instead of Harry.
Voldemort is dead.
What? Voldemort is dead? And then what, Harry?
Harry looked at me, dazed. "And then nothing, Doctor Dumbledore," he said simply. "That's it. That's the end of the story."
That's the end of the story?
What?
No. That can't be the end Harry! The story makes no sense! Something must be missing still! How can the tale end like this?
"Tell me more, Harry!" I pleaded. "Tell me more about Voldemort. Is he really dead?"
He nodded. "Yes, he is dead."
"Voldemort?Tom Riddle is dead? You lived, and he died?"
And all at once, something seemed to stir in Harry. The strangely absent, faraway expression I had seen so often faded from his face and was replaced by a look of - of what? Some kind of horrible awakening-?
"Tom," he whispered, his voice almost inaudible. "He is dead. Tom is dead. They killed him. Tom is dead…"
And Harry collapsed into my arms, sobbing, screaming, wild with some unknown grief. I had no choice but to give him a sedative and send him home with his parents.
I remained in my office for hours, desperately searching for some kind of understanding. It appears that Harry has finally made a breakthrough, faced the hidden truth at last. But what is it? Why do I not see it? All the information I need should be right here, here in my files.
Tom is dead.
Tom is dead. They killed him. They. Who are "they"? And who the hell is Tom?