Mary815 : Glad you loved it, I always wanted them to go together ^^ it's the place I love the most in France lol (can't wait Halloween to go back *-*) I hope you'll enjoy this new OS and able to "endure" Suliet. xoxo
Summary : The Ajira6 have been back for 2 months and Sawyer decides to visit Rachel to tell her about Juliet's death.
So yes WARNING it will be related to SULIET
thanks Su for checking on my english (as always^^)
Kate was with Aaron in the lounge and Claire arrived downstairs wearing a nice sweater and long skirt.
"Butiful!" Aaron said with a smile.
The young woman smiled back then went toward them. Kate and Claire lived together, and the little boy knew she was his mom but Claire didn't want him to call her "mommy" yet. She couldn't, she still has her "moments" and she was scared to hurt her own baby. Kate helped her as much as she could, especially during the interviews...
Ajira6 was the famous discussion all over L.A. The fact two other survivors from the crash of Oceanic815 survived for 3 years and lived together like Robinson Crusoe became an important subject. (It was the storyline they chose to tell to the media). They even wanted to make a movie about it. Sawyer and Claire were the new couple, and everyone thought they were together during the 3 years "because it wouldn't be logical a young woman and a gorgeous man living together wouldn't be together..."
Kate didn't like that those people thought Sawyer and Claire could have...
She shook her head to erase those images from her mind.
"So it looks good on me?"
"Of course."
The women smiled to each other, then Claire joined them for the breakfast. She looked at Aaron who smiled to her, she smiled back, happy to be next to him. Kate left them to go into the kitchen. The bell rang and she went to open it, and she wasn't surprised to see Sawyer in front of her.
"Morning Freckles."
"Hi Sawyer."
They smiled to each other and then he went inside the house.
"Hello my lil' wife!"
Claire looked at him, surprised, and then she understood.
"Uncle Sawsaw!"
"Hello Kiddo."
"Come to eat with us. Mommy made pantakes!"
"Pancakes baby" Kate said smiling.
"It's same mommy!" Aaron affirmed.
Kate and Sawyer exchanged a glance. Sawyer nodded and he sat next to the kid. Aaron started to speak to him. He was impatient for summer. He wanted his uncle to bring him at the park and teach him to ride a bike.
Kate got a flash of another sunshine day and Jack's face came into her mind...
"Kate?"
"What?"
"Are you okay" Claire asked worried.
"Yeah...So Sawyer, what is the honor of your visit ?"
The man put his mug on the table then looked at her.
"I'm leaving in a couple of days."
"Oh!"
Kate felt her heart sink. Since they had been back, Sawyer came by often, sometimes he even stayed for dinner, and Miles, Richard and even Frank joined them. But he never left...Leaving where? With who?
"So...Are you leaving with someone?"
"Nope, alone."
She felt relieved, but she knew she shouldn't. Sawyer had the right to start a new life, but having to share him with another woman...
"Want come uncle Sawsaw!"
"We'll go together somewhere when I return Little Mouse."
"I am not mose!" Aaron said furiously, crossing his arms.
Sawyer smiled bemused, then started to eat his breakfast. Later, Aaron and Claire were watching tv together and Kate was washing the dishes. Sawyer joined her as almost all mornings. He looked at Claire and her son.
"She seems pretty good with him now."
"Aaron is an adorable kid, he understands fast and I think he feels the maternal bond. I think pretty soon, she'll be able to take care of him herself," Kate said sincerely.
He nodded to her, and Kate looked at him and bit her lips.
"Where are you going?"
"I have something to do," he said distant.
"Want me to join you?"
Sawyer lifted his head and glanced at her.
"No Kate, not this time."
They said nothing to each other then finished cleaning up.
"If you need someone to talk to, I'm here, you know that.'
"I know."
They smiled to each other, then Sawyer said goodbye to everyone and left. Kate watched the car leaving the street and turned to face Claire, surprised.
"Are you okay?"
"Yeah, why?"
"Sawyer left very fast today. I thought you had a fight."
"No, I would have preferred that..." Kate murmured to herself.
The car arrived at the airport, and Sawyer took a breath, then took his bag.
In the plane, he was very nervous to take a plane again, but also about the destination of his trip. He almost regretted not taking up Kate's invitation to come with him...
When they were flying, he felt relieved, but still nervous of what it will happen next...
A few hours passed since Sawyer left. Claire was taking a nap in her bedroom and Aaron went to the park with his grandmother. Carole didn't like that her daughter still lived here and not with her, but she noticed how much she needed Kate. She really helped her a lot, and she was essential for recovery. So Kate was all alone and she was bored and she couldn't stop thinking of Sawyer's trip. Leaving for several days, but where? Alone, but to meet who?
She exhaled, then grabbed the phone and dialed a number. She waited a few seconds and then someone answered.
"Hi Miles."
The man shrugged an eyebrow surprised by this call. She usually called him during the afternoon to invite him for dinner or something else, but never in the morning.
"Hi Kate, you need something?"
Kate put a strand of hair behind her ear and bit her lower lip before asking to visit him. Miles accepted, so she wrote something for Claire and left the house.
She arrived a half hour later in front of the stunning and expensive house. He spent a few diamonds to get this house and a car. Miles opened the door very fast and she walked inside after they embraced. He offered her coffee and they sat in the dining room.
"So, why did you want to see me?"
"Did you know Sawyer was leaving?"
"Oh that..."
"What "that"?"Kate asked a bit worried.
"Nothing, well yes kinda... but I don't think he would like it if I told you about it."
"Miles, we're friends right?"
"Yeah, but Jim and I, we have been friends for 3 years, and I know he would kill me if I tell you about it...sorry Kate, I can't."
Kate nodded, disappointed, but knew she couldn't get information from Miles. She finished her drink then said goodbye to him, but she turned before leaving and looked at her friend.
"I care a lot about him, Miles.I just want to be here for him."
"I know, me too, but don't worry, he just has someone to see and he'll be back soon."
"Someone?"
"Yeah, a woman..."
"A woman?"
The man breathed and put his hands on her shoulders.
"Go back home, take care of Claire and the kid, and he'll come back soon."
She forced herself to smile at him and left. When she got home, she found Carole and Aaron. She shook her head and focused on the little boy she loved so deeply.
It was night time and after a stop in Atlanta, Sawyer arrived in Miami. His heart beat fast even while he was taking a room in the hotel.
He fell on the bed, then looked at the phone. He picked up it then dialed a number but before he could hear a voice, he hung up. No he shouldn't call her. He should do this alone.
Sawyer sighed, then put on the tv and watched it without any interest...
Kate and Claire had put Aaron in bed and they were watching a movie together, at least Claire was, but Kate was lost in her thoughts.
"Kate?"
"What?"
"You should call him. You know, I don't think he'll be upset if you do that."
"I don't know Claire, he spoke to Miles without telling me anything, and we are friends too..."
She lowered her eyes and pressed her pillow against her breast.
"Call him!"
"No, he has to call if he wants to speak," Kate said annoyed.
Claire gave up and sighed, watching the movie.
"At least try to pretend you're watching the movie because it feels like I'm watching a funeral when it supposed to be comedy movie with Jim Carrey," the blond woman added, giving a glance to the brunette.
Kate said nothing but tried to focus her attention on the movie. Once it was over, they went upstairs to sleep, but while she was lying in her bed, she couldn't stop thinking about Sawyer's trip.
Did he have another child somewhere? Had he fallen in love with another woman since his return?
No, Sawyer was still in love with Juliet. She could see it when he was lost in his thoughts, and she understood it, because she missed Jack too, but everyday she moved on, thanks to her little family.
Kate turned in her bed and tried to sleep.
In the morning, Sawyer left the hotel and paid for the room. Then he went to a little house near the ocean. He rang the bell and a blond woman opened the door..
"Hello."
His hands wrapped around his backpack and he breathed and looked at the woman in front of him.
"Hi Rachel."
"Do we know each other?"
"No but I...Juliet...she..."
"You said Juliet? Is my sister okay?" Rachel asked with a smile.
Sawyer's heart ripped in his chest. He asked her if he could come inside and they could talk, and Rachel happily invited him in. Sawyer felt more and more nervous, and the blond woman asked him to sit and left to bring something to drink. When she handed him the glasses he said no and asked her to sit.
"So Juliet will come home soon?" Rachel asked happily.
"I'm sorry Rachel, Juliet is...she's gone..."
For the second time today, his heart ripped in his chest. He remembered the last time they saw each other, their goodbye. She was dead because of him, not because of Jack, only him.
"I know she's gone but...she'll come back right?"
Sawyer looked at her intensely, unable to say a word. Rachel's face changed and tears fell on her cheeks and Sawyer took her hand in his.
"She didn't abandon you Rachel, she wanted to go home but...when things could have changed, she was gone." Sawyer said with honesty.
"Were you friends?"
James' mask broke and he felt nostalgic and bitter, but he answered her anyway with a smile.
"We were together for 3 years, she was...I loved her very deeply, and I know how much she loved you and Julian."
"Why didn't she ever come back?"
"She couldn't...she, well her research took some time, and she wanted to save lives."
"It worked? She saved people?"
"Yeah."
Rachel smiled.
"Juliet always wanted to save my life, and she succeeded, and I got Julian, I owe her so much."
"Me too."
They looked each other, feeling the same pain.
"How did she die?" Rachel asked heartbroken.
"She...an incident, an explosion, we couldn't save her."
The blond woman started to cry and Sawyer hugged her.
"She always put flowers in the house, lilacs were her favorite."
Rachel stepped back and smiled sadly.
"Every day she spoke to me about you, how much Julian would have grown up by now, what he could love to do when he'll be an adult. She wanted to teach him her passion for the medicine, she wanted to bring him to the beach, she wanted to cultivate flowers with you and eat your favorite pie."
"Apple pie."
He nodded.
"Thanks, thanks for taking care of her. She wasn't lucky in love and I think it was a bit my fault...I'm happy she found someone who loved her before she was...gone..."
Sawyer smiled.
They spent the day together, then Rachel presented Julian to Sawyer. She invited him to stay for dinner and then for a couple of days. He accepted and during the several days he learned more about the past of the woman he loved and how close her sister and her were. He noticed a picture of Juliet in the house and grabbed it. He looked at it for a long time. She seemed so happy, almost the same way she did when they spent their time together.
"I'm so sorry, Blondie, you should have been here with them."
The day of his departure, Rachel gave him a notebook.
"What is this?"
"It was her journal. She wrote it when she was kid and also when she was an adult. She wrote in it since she was 6, until her last day here with me... I believe, I think she would have loved for you to have it."
He took it and thanked her. Then she hugged him and he promised he would write to her to give some news.
During the trip back, he read the journal and discovered how much Juliet suffered when her parents broke up, how much she wanted to be loved, and how many times she got her heart broken even when she was a teenager. Sawyer regretted making her feel this pain again, but then he read something which astonished him.
I'll leave Rachel, this research seems very important, so I think I have to go, I feel it. Mom always said we should make choices in life even if it makes us suffer, the suffering is part of life, the love is also part of life, and living is also suffering, but I can't erase it because I would erase the most important feeling in my life: LOVE. It's always like that. I lived, loving and suffering, but never forget this feeling no matter the pain. Love is stronger and that is what we will keep as memories.
"Maybe we weren't meant to be together, but we loved each other. It was real," Sawyer murmured, closing the journal.
Kate was making dinner with Claire when the bell rang. She went to open it and was surprised to see Sawyer at her door.
"Hi."
"Hi Freckles."
They looked at each other a long time, then she invited him inside.
"For 5 days we didn't see you..."Kate said with distant voice.
"I had something to do."
"I know, and you...It's over?"
Sawyer smiled and she smiled back then he handed her a box.
"What is this?"
"A way to apologize for my silence."
She opened it and stared at him confused.
"You brought me strawberries? Don't we offer flowers when we want to apologize?"
"No, I wanted something special for you," Sawyer admitted.
She looked at him intensely and understood.
"You want to stay for dinner?"
He nodded and they went inside. Aaron almost jumped on him because he had a lot to tell him. Kate went into the kitchen but looked at them amused.
"So he told you what he did?"
She turned to face Claire, smiling.
"No."
"No. And it doesn't upset you?"
"It doesn't matter."
"For 5 days you thought about it and now you..."
Kate giggled then looked at the box in her hands.
"What is that?"
"Strawberries."
"Strawberries? And you forgave him because he brought you strawberries?"
Kate lifted her head and answered with a big smile on her face. Claire was surprised.
"It's his way to say "sorry," Kate added dreamily.
Claire couldn't say anything because Kate left to join the boys and prepare the dinner.