*Edwards POV*
I could tell that she didn't want to sleep over. That part was obvious. I just didn't want her to think that she could trust me, and yet, still be afraid of me. And that was what was happening. She wanted to go out with me, but she was afraid. She wanted to trust me, but she was afraid. She wanted to believe me, but she was afraid. I had to prove to her that she was safe with me. That I wouldn't hurt her. She trusted me, that part was obvious as well, but at the same time, under the trust was fear.
"Why do you want me to sleep over?" She asked as she got on my back. I forgot that we left my car at the end the street.
"Because. I know your afraid of me and I want you to trust me. I know that you trust me the way being like you trust me to protect you that I'm protective of you. But you don't trust me enough to actually to sleep over, or have an serious relationship with me. I want to show you that I'm totally different than the boy you met when you were seven. I'll prove it to you Bella. I swear, I wont hurt you." I promised.
"Oh." She said before resting her chin back in the hallow of my neck.
"Do you like the feeling?" I asked
"Of what?" She asked wonder coloring her voice.
"Of the wind in your hair. The breeze hitting your face." She thought for a while.
"Well, when you know its coming yes, its pretty amazing. But when you don't know its coming, like when you first did it. Its pretty scary, like all you feel in the wind, you don't have time to think." She said, I nodded my head.
"I'm sorry for scaring you. It was mean of me." I apologized.
"It's okay, its not everyday a vampire apologizes for being scary. So, I'll forgive this one. Who knows, maybe he'll eat me if I don't." She said with a chuckle. I giggled also.
"Actually, I would. Your scent is like calling out to me. Hard to resist. Do something wrong, and I might take you up on that offer." I said jokingly. I think she believed me.
"I'm just joking Bella." I said.
"Oh. Sorry, I thought you were serious." She whispered.
I put her down.
"Come on. We have to go to your house and get your stuff for the weekend before it gets too late." I said as I opened the car door for her.
"Do I have to sleep at your house?" She asked with a pout.
"Yes, Alice is so happy that you are. And so is Rosalie. And my parents. And even your dad is. Please? The weekend will be done before you know it." I said once I was in the drivers seat.
"But, what about us?" She asked with a hint of fear in her voice.
"What about us?" I asked confused.
"You, and me, in a bedroom, together." She whispered.
"Yes. And? Your problem is." I asked confused.
"My problem-" She took a deep breath "-is that its just me and you. Alone. What if you, well I don't know, get a boner or an urge to do something to me?" She asked scared. I pursed my lips together in a frown.
"Bella, I would never-" She cut me off.
"Okay, I know. Sorry, it was a stupid question. I'm just… just, just scared okay? Not of you personally, but of what you did, if you did it once, you can do it again Edward." She finally admitted it.
"Its different Bella. I didn't want to do it. I had to. And I wouldn't do it again. Hell. Put you through all that again? I'd have to be a mad man." (A/N Mad as in crazy not like angry) I assured her.
"I guess your right, sorry I'm just paranoid I guess." She said nodding her head. I cut the engine off and looked at her.
"Go get your stuff." I said as I unlocked the door.
*Bella's POV*
I got out of his car and knocked on my door.
"Hey Bells." Charlie said once he opened the door.
"Hi dad, so your sure you want me to stay there for the whole weekend?" I asked. Yes, I did trust Edward, but I was also scared of him. it's a weird mixture of feelings for a boy, who's absolutely gorgeous, I mean shouldn't I be begging for him to do something to me? But I'm afraid he's going to get into me. But I loved the way he kissed me. UGH this was so confusing.
"Yea, sure. Alice and Rosalie are nice girls. Aren't they like older though?" He asked.
"Yea, but I have class with one of their brothers and I sat with him at lunch, and they invited me." It was half a lie, half the truth. This was the first time I had lied to Charlie. It felt weird.
"Oh, well. Go get your stuff, don't want to keep them waiting outside." He said gesturing me towards the stairs.
"Oh, Edward wont mind." I said taking a step up the stairs.
"Edward?" He asked confused.
Shit.
"Yea, their brother was going this way anyway, and offered me the ride." I lied.
"Oh, well you don't want to keep mister Cullen waiting, now do you?" I rolled my eyes and went upstairs to my room. I packed my pajamas and three days worth of clothes. My toothbrush, my hairbrush and other things that I might need in a weekends worth of time. I slung the bag over my shoulder and went downstairs.
"Bye dad." I said looking into the living room and then I went towards the door.
"How'd it go?" Edward asked once I was in the passenger seat.
"Good, until I told him you were the one to bring me here." He laughed.
"Yea, I heard. So you ready for a weekend filled with vampires?" He asked. I sighed. Get over your stupid fear Bella.
"Yes I am. It's not everyday you get invited to a vampires house. I cant wait!" I said with as much enthusiasm as I could.
"You know your fake enthusiasm sucks Bella." Edward told me smiling.
"Great, so I'm not an actor. So you know that I wont be able to act like I'm happy, not scared, or having a great time." I said. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be harsh." I apologized.
"You weren't being harsh. You think that's harsh? Wow, your really a nice girl." He laughed and I slightly smiled.
"But really, try to have a good time Bella." I shook my head.
"Yea, bunking with my rapist is totally having a good time. Maybe he'll rape me again!" I said with fake enthusiasm.
"Not, funny Bella." He said.
"A girl can dream can't she?" I asked attitude filling my voice.
"Of course." He said rolling his eyes.
"Sorry," I whispered. "I didn't want to be mean." I apologized. He laughed very lightly.
"You really nice Bella." He said smiling.
"Well, when your seven and that happens your eyes really open and you don't want to ruin anybodys life. I learned to be as nice as I can. I use to baby-sit and do community service. I wanted people to be happy." I said looking out of the windshield.
"I completely ruined your life didn't I?" He asked a little miserably.
"Kind of sort of." I said honestly.
"I'm sorry, I just couldn't.-" I cut him, off.
"Hey, listen. You didn't want me to die. No has ever done that for me. No on would ever do that for me. Only you would. Thank you for that. So what, I'm living in fear for the rest of my life. At least I'm living. Thanks Edward, I could never repay you." I said looking into his golden eyes. Seriously, gold eyes.
He cut the engine and walked me into the house.
"Bella!" Alice and Rosalie yelled both running down the stairs.
"Hey Rosalie, hi Alice." I said smiling.
"Hi, so what do you want to do?" Alice asked. I shook my head.
"I don't know. But what I do know is that I'm here all weekend. So we have plenty of time to do whatever you guys want." They both squealed. I smiled uncomfortably and blushed. Edward laughed.
"Come on Bella. Lets go bring your stuff upstairs." He said. I followed him up the stairs. I dropped my bag at the foot of the couch and put my purse on the couch.
"Are you unhappy?" He asked.
"Uh, kind of, I mean like I don't want to be here, but I do at the same time. It's really confusing. I don't know, but all that matters is that I'm here." I said confidently. If only that was the way I really felt.
"Don't worry. I wont do anything to hurt you." I suddenly started to stiffen, that was the same thing that he had said to me before he started.
"Don't say that. Please, don't." I begged in a whispered tone.
"What?" He asked confused.
"That's what you said to me that night." I said.
"Oh, sorry." He apologized.
"No problem. What time is it?" I asked looking around the room for a clock.
"It's 9:00." He said.
"Ohh." I said smiling.
"Bella! Can I give you a makeover please?" Alice pleaded. I sighed.
"Sure Alice." I said walking out of the room.
"Rosalie! I'm giving Bella a makeover. Want to help?" She asked and suddenly Rosalie was in front of me.
"Sure." She said playing with my hair, probably thinking what to do with it.
"Uh, one condition guys. I'm like probably going to bed in 2 hours, so like, something that I can sleep in, please." I asked. Edward smiled.
"Alright. Alice, I'm doing her hair." Alice groaned.
"Fine, but I'm doing her eyes, and her outfit." They were getting excited over making over me. Rosalie ran into the bathroom and came back with millions of ribbons, hair elastics, a curling iron, and a hair straightener. My eyes got wide.
"Bella, just calm down. Your hearts beating like super slow. Its just I don't know what I want to do, so I brought everything." I smiled.
"Come on Bella." Alice complained pulling me into her room.
Alice threw me a pair of silky black booty shorts and a matching black tank top.
"Um, what's this?" I asked looking at it doubtfully.
"Umm, sweats to bed? I don't think so, you want Edward to want you, don't you? You gotta look hot." She said smiling.
"Alice, I'm 14½ me wearing that indicated I'm a whore." I said.
"Bella, trust me, Edwards going to love it." She said smiling.
"What! No, I don't want Edward to love it! I mean I do but I don't. He cant what if he gets excited? Alice I cant, no, no, no." I said shaking my head.
"Bella, calm down. Edward wont do anything to you unless you ask. Just wear the hot outfit and go to sleep in it. But, he is going to like the way you look in it. That's all." She reassured me. I sighed.
"Can you guys at least like get out, please." I asked sheepishly. I heard a fait chuckle from outside the room.
"Edward, stop eavesdropping, you old nose hound." Alice snickered.
"Old, nose hound?" Rosalie and myself asked.
"It's the only thing that came to mind. I don't know. Well, come on Rose let the girl change." She said pulling her out of the room.
I put on the tank top first, scared of how short the shorts would be. It was really low-cut, barley covering my boobs. I slipped the shots on. I turned toward the mirror. I looked like a whore! The shorts were so short, half my butt was hanging out. The tank-top was even more low-cut then what it seemed.
I ran out of the room and screamed "I'm not wearing this!" And ran into Edwards room.
"Do you mind if I hide in here?" I asked looking at my feet.
"Sure, but nice outfit." He said jokingly.
"Not funny." I hissed.
"Did Alice put it on you?" He asked.
"Yep." I said rolling my eyes.
"Do you want to sleep with that?" He asked. I still hadn't looked up. He came in front of my and pushed my chin lightly up.
What choice do I have? Kick him out of the room to change? That would be mean of me. Go to the bathroom to change? Alice would catch me and beg me not to change.
"I guess." I said looking into his eyes.
"I can get out and you can change." He said. I couldn't look away from his eyes.
"No." I said memorized by his eyes.
"Your going to change in front of me?" He asked.
"No!" I half screamed. "No, I'm not going to change. I'll survive if I wear this just tonight." He rolled his eyes and picked me up bride style and dropped me on the couch lightly.
"So, your hiding in here for the rest of the night." He asked raising her eyebrow.
"I have to." I said looking down at my fingers.
"Will you stop that. Please?" He asked. I looked up.
"What?" I asked confused.
"Looking down, I want to see your eyes." I looked up and he smiled. He tilted his head and leaned in. I leaned also, and finally our lips met. I forgot all of my fears and deepened the kiss. There was a knock at the door.
"Bella, it's me Rosalie. Alice isn't here. Can I please do your hair though?" I pulled away form the kiss and Edward frowned. I chuckled lightly.
"Sure Rosalie. Where's Alice?" I asked.
"Hunting." I shivered. Edward rubbed my shoulders.
"Alright, you can do it." She can in with two hair elastics and four ribbons. Two pink two black.
"Can I do braids Bella? I'll put the ribbons in them. Can I?" I smiled.
"Sure Rosalie." I got up motioned Edward to move over. He sat on the couch and I sat on his lap.
"Aw." Rosalie said smiling. She started on my braids and they came out really cute. By the time she was done it was 10:35. I yawned.
"Night Bella." Rosalie said leaving. I cuddled closer to Edward and he laid on the couch. He pulled a blanket over my body.
"Are you still afraid?" He asked.
"No. I don't even know why I was afraid. The only scary thing is that one day you wont be here." I said cuddling with him.
"Why not?" He said.
"I'll die one day, or you'll get bored with me. But I don't want to think of that. You're here with me now, that's all I need." I said as he kissed my forehead.
"That's right baby girl. Now go to sleep Honey. I'll be here when you wake up. Promise." I believed him. He was here. And if he wanted me I would be his. His everything. I drifted to sleep with the biggest smile on my face.