Ethan sat in the changing room of some ratty gym. Thabo had finished his fight. That man is scary sometimes. He's just so quick. They were both professional boxers now. Had turned professional 6 months ago. The fights were definitely harder but he'd had his first victory on his last fight and was feeling good. Well not totally good. He missed Lexi. He hated leaving her. He thought about her loads. She was right. He couldn't box for the rest of his life. I mean eventually he'd have to go and get a proper job for when he was married and he had kids. But what was he good at? Right Eth, put this out of your mind! Think about it later. Pulled his phone from his bag. He wanted to hear her voice. The letters he had picked up fell out. He'd forgot about those. He picked up the top letter. Hand written. The handwriting was vaguely familiar. Tore it open.

Dear Ethan.

This is your dad. I know your wondering why I wrote to you after all this time. I mean how old are you now? 15 16? No, younger I think! Anyways it's been a while since that day and I wanna tell you I might be getting out soon. Hopefully. And I wanna see you again. I'm not the same man now. I'm bi-polar. Struggle to contain emotions when I'm not medicated. But I'm great now. Calm. I know what I did was wrong and I can't take it back but your mum she provoked me if I'm telling the truth. You might know what it's like if you have a girlfriend. I remember you were always like me when you were young. Losing your temper easily. Fighting. I wish I could take back what you saw too. I should never have did that to you. I'm sorry for what I did to you and Lauren. I now know how much I love you both. It's too late for Lauren but I hope we can mend bridges. All I can say is sorry. Easy said but if I do get out I want to try and make this up to you.

I'm sorry son.

Dad

Ethan went from shock to white hot anger to all encompassing rage. Did he realise what he wrote? Mum deserved it. He was sorry Ethan saw what he did but not sorry he did it! He got up and paced. Ethan was like him? Like hell. That's a freaking insult! Did his dad really think he would hit the woman he loved? The mother of his children. Obviously by the tone of the letter! The letter crumpled as his fist clenched tightly. His dad didn't mean it! He thought sarcastically. Well he wouldn't mean it either when he pounded his face in! He's changed? He'll change alright. He'll be rotting in hell by the time Ethan finished with him! He's getting out? That was the worst. How dare they let out his mothers murderer. Overcrowded jails so give him some pills and send him out to kill again? With each statement he felt his blood boil hotter. If he gets out mum he's dead. I swear on everything I have! I promised you then and I promise you now! He walked and punched his locker. Felt pain streak though his hand.

"Hey Eth 5 minutes yeah." Thabo said popping his head in. "Hey man you ok?"

"I'm fine!" he said coldly. Pulled on his gloves. The ones Lexi gave him at Christmas. They had Ethan embroidered on the Velcro. He pounded his fists together. Walked out of the changing room and into the ring.

He smiled as he saw his opponent. The Ivan Drago look-alike. His first final.

"He's out for blood mate. Be careful!" Thabo warned.

"Good!" Ethan replied.

Thabo knew something was wrong Ethan wasn't his usual bouncy chirpy self. He looked cold, hard remote, serious. And his face was deadly.

"I'll have him down in one round!" he vowed.

"Whatever mate!" Thabo scoffed.

Ethan stood in his corner. Walked to the middle.

"I'll have you this time kid!"

They touched gloves.

"Whatever!" Ethan turned his back and the boxer pushed him.

Ethan spun quickly and his fist connected with the boxers jaw. "Don't push me!" he spat.

Thabo was in the ring in seconds and had grabbed Ethan. The other boxers trainer had grabbed him

"Cool it mate. What's up with you?" Thabo asked.

Ethan's face was mean as his eyes narrowed. "One round!" Ethan repeated.

The bell rang.

(X)

Ethan walked out purposefully. He didn't bother with any preliminaries. Went straight in there. Drago hit him but he wasn't feeling it. His opponent frowned. Ethan distracted him with his left then uppercut him with his right. Got in a combo of 3 punches to his face, firstly a right then a left. The boxer went to block with his right but Ethan hit him with another left. Flung the hardest right at him he could. The boxers eye exploded. Ethan looked and saw Drago wobble. One more punch had the boxer on the floor. Suddenly Ethan was over him hitting him. He was having an out of body experience. Like he was stood outside his body watching it pound an innocent person. The ref was trying to pull him off be he couldn't. And Ethan couldn't stop. The other trainer came over and Ethan started on him to. Thabo grabbed him from behind.

"He's a disgrace! He should be banned!" the other trained yelled as he saw to his young protégé .

"Come and stop me then!" Ethan yelled. Straining against Thabo.

Thabo pushed him in the corner. Stood in front of him. "You want out Eth then you hit me. C'mon kid do it!" Thabo warned.

Problem was Ethan was angry enough to try it. He swung his fist. Thabo ducked and then tried to engage in a fist fight. Ethan pulled his gloves off.

"C'mon then Thabo." Ethan taunted pushing him. "Take a swipe at me!"

Thabo was tempted. He took less then this for a man to get a slap. But this was his friend and something was obviously wrong so Thabo refused. Ethan was pissed that Thabo wouldn't hit him. Pound his face in.

The police had arrived. And the judges pointed to him. He was restrained and then pulled away.

(X)

Ethan was in the changing room pacing. The police were stood outside. He needed to do something. Hit something. Have the hell kicked out of him! Anything to get rid of this murderous energy he felt. Thabo hadn't rose to it so someone else would have to. His opponent? He smiled. He knew a bar that all the boxers frequented. He'd bet that's where he was going tonight. He walked over and punched the mirror on the wall. It shattered and split all his knuckles. Thabo walked into the room. Had his gloves in hand.

"What the hell is wrong with you?"

"I'm fine Thabo. Leave me!" his fists clenched and blood dripped onto the floor.

"You won by the way. KO'd him in the first round. Got a bonus on your winnings for that. They were reluctant to give you this. I persuaded them seeing as you KO'd him then kicked off."

He put the check in Ethan's bag.

Ethan paced still.

"Ethan tell me what's wrong mate. I might be able to help you. I can have Liv talk to Lex if that's what it is."

"Go to hell Thabo. OK leave me alone!" Ethan walked towards the shower.

Thabo shrugged then left. Phoned Liv immediately.

"Hey gorgeous is Danny or Alice there? it's important."

Danny came on the phone.

"Hey Danny is Lex ill or have Ethan and Lex broke up or something?"

"Everything is fine. Why?"

"Ethan lost it. I mean really lost it. KO'd his opponent in less than a minute. Started on the trainer then me. He was completely gone. Enraged wasn't the word!"

Oh God he knew! Was Danny's only thought.

"I'll phone him Thabo. Thanks for the heads up. I can sort this."

Danny rang Ethan but his phone was off! Dammit!

(X)

Ethan was calm. Well calmer. He was sat in his hotel. He needed Lexi but she wasn't here. He longed for her. She would hug him and keep him calm coz that's what she did. She was everything to him. He phoned her.

"Hello Lexi, you have no idea how much I needed to hear your voice." he blurted as he picked up.

"Hey eth. How'd your fight go?"

"Not too good. I don't wanna talk about it." he told her. Savouring her soft tone.

"Oh Eth did you lose?"

"In a way." he admitted.

Lexi felt irrational anger rise at his evasive tone and funny attitude. "What does that mean?" she asked. A angry tone in her voice.

"What?" he asked. He didn't wanna deal with this now. Don't let her argue with him please!

"Your cryptic comments!" she spat.

"O I understand now. It's the time of the month isn't it?" he asked. Annoyed.

"Why'd you phone me Ethan. To provoke me? Job done!"

"No I miss you so much. I needed to hear your voice. You calm me."

"Well Ethan if that was true you would never have gone!"

"Oh no Lexi. Please I don't wanna argue I just need to sit and talk to you. To hear your voice." he pleaded. She didn't hear the tone just the words.

"Well if you remember I told you we were over!" she disconnected.

So she didn't wanna talk to him. Fine! Didn't wanna be with him Even better. If that's how she wanted to be then she can go to hell! He was better off alone. This is what happens when you rely on people, they bail on you when you need them the most! He left his hotel room and went to the bar, showed his id and asked for the strongest drink they had. It was nasty but doing it's job. He felt wramth rushing through him.

After a couple of hours had passed a tall slim woman came to talk to him. She smiled at him predatorily. I like your muscles. She said. You look hard. Dangerous." she'd purred.

He shrugged and sat down.

"I'm Alesha." she told him.

"Ethan." he replied.

They were chatting and he was buying her drinks.

"Your very handsome." she told him.

"And your beautiful." he told her slurred. What you doing Ethan go to your room and to bed ALONE! You can't do this to Lexi. A voice told him.

"Go away." he muttered. Head fuzzy.

"What?" she asked.

"Nothing darlin'."

She beamed at him at the endearment.

"Where you staying tonight?" she asked seductively.

"Hotel." he said. "I go back home tomorrow."

She smiled climbed from her seat opposite. Sat beside him and kissed him softly. He responded without thinking.

"Let's go then." she told him.

She got a taxi and they went to the hotel.

(X)

Ethan woke up. His head hurt. Pounded like a bas drum actually. He couldn't open his eyes. They felt like they melded shut. He opened one a crack. "Arghh! Too bright!" he muttered.

He turned and rolled into a warm body.

"Huh?" Lexi had to get out of here. She wasn't allowed to stay with him at night. He couldn't even remembering being with her last night actually.

He finally felt his eyes open fully. Was looking at an unfamiliar woman's face. His jaw dropped. Who the hell is she and what the hell is she doing in bed with him naked? Work it out brainiac! Yesterday rushed back to him.

His partner on bed woke up and smiled at him seductively. "Good morning."

"Yeah, good morning." he replied nervously.

"I'm glad your awake. Last night was amazing. I'm intrigued how you'd do it sober." she dived on him and he kissed her.

"Really sorry but I've got a plane to catch!" he said pulling away.

She smiled and nodded. "You don't have to worry I don't want a relationship either. Just mutual satisfaction!" she purred.

"Sorry but I really do have a plane to catch!" he pulled his ticket from his drawer and showed it to her. He also wasn't for casual sex.

She shrugged. "Oh well. Can I borrow your shower?"

He nodded.

As soon as he was gone he searched the room. Found the empty condom wrappers. Collapsed on the bed. "Thank God!" he whispered.

She appeared fully clothes.

"It's nice knowing you Ian."

"Yeah you too." he replied not meaning it at all.

She closed the door as he closed it behind her.

He heard the muffled tone of his mobile. He rose from the bed and pulled on his boxers. Rifled around for his jeans. As he pulled his mobile out Lexi's smiling face flashed indicating who was calling him. He was filled with a deep feeling of guilt. God he had betrayed her! He picked up the phone.

"Hey Ethan." she said happily.

"Hey Lex." he said neutrally.

"Look Ethan the first thing I wanna say is I'm sorry about what I said last night. I was just being soft and hormonal. We've got stuff to talk about when you get home." he missed the subtle hint and excitement in her voice.

"Yeah I agree." he said sadly.

"I just really love you and want us to work you know. I don't wanna break up."

Guilt ate at him. "I love you Lex. We'll talk later."

He already knew what he had to do. And say. He walked to the shower.

A/N oh ethna ethan ethan wot did u do? and that last line. wot on earth is he gonna say? hmmm the plot thickens