Spoilers: Based on spoiler scenes for S10.

A/N: In this next chapter, the tape is played to the very end, wounds are healed, and a family comes together to finally mourn the loss of their beloved Ella. Please read and review. Thank you.

~o~o~

Chapter 3

As they slowly climbed the stairs, Lois, Lucy and Sam all braced themselves for what was about to be revealed to them on the tape, but Sam wanted to say something first.

As the girls sat close together on his bed waiting for him to press play, he tried to explain his actions. "Girls, please try to remember that I had every intention of revealing the tape to you, but everything happened suddenly and unexpectedly and your mother and I, we only had a few minutes together and then … she was gone," Sam managed to say and then he went to sit next to them. "Are you ready?"

Lois and Lucy glanced at each other. "We're ready, Daddy," Lois replied.

~o~o~

"Are you sure about this, honey? The girls …" Sam said not sure she should be doing this.

"It's for our girls, Sam. Please promise me you'll show this to them when the time is right," Ella pleaded with her husband.

"Ella, please," Sam tried to change her mind. "I don't know about this."

"Sam, please do this for me."

Sam sighed. "Alright, for you, Ella, anything for you," he replied.

Ella smiled and said "Thank you, Sam," and then began her speech.

Ella closed her eyes for a moment and then stared directly at the camera.

"My beautiful girls, I love you both so much. I'm making this tape as my final goodbye to you and to your father. I wish with all my heart that I could be there for you, for all the memories and happier times you'll share together as a family. All the 'firsts' of your lives … your first day of high school, your first day of college, your first date, your …" Ella tried to smile, but wiped at her eyes with a tissue. "Your wedding days," she continued with a whimper.

"Ella," Sam tried. "Maybe you should stop for a minute. Let me turn this off and we can continue later."

"No, no, I'm alright," Ella said and straightened her spine. "My beautiful Lois, honey, I know this will be hard for you to accept because you are the oldest, but please be there for your father. He'll bury himself in his work and maybe even …" She stopped and raised her eyes to her husband. "Maybe he'll go on like this never happened, pretending like I'm still here, that everything will be fine, as long as he doesn't accept it, accept that I'm gone."

"Ella no," Sam interrupted her. "That's not true. I wouldn't do that to them."

"I know you have every intention of being there for them, but you have to promise me that you won't ignore them, that you'll help them, Sam. They'll need you now more than ever. Please don't hurt them like that. You have to promise me."

"Ella please, you're getting worked up, please stay calm."

Ella suddenly realized that it was getting hard to breathe, as she raised frightened eyes to her husband, and then she knew. "Sam, I …" she tried to finish, but her eyes rolled back in her head and she slumped forward about to fall to the floor.

"Ella!" Sam exclaimed as he put the camera down and ran to his wife and caught her before she could hit the floor. He picked her up and laid her on the bed, not realizing that the camera was still recording, and that they had moved out of camera range, but their voices could still be heard clearly.

Lois and Lucy turned to their father, both with tears flowing freely down their faces and tried to say how sorry they were that he had to go through this. Sam reached over and took hold of their joined hands and they all held tightly to each other and listened to the rest of the tape.

"Ella, Ella, can you hear me? Ella, please say something."

"Sam?"

"Just rest honey, we'll finish the tape later when you're stronger."

"No, not much … time left and … I have to … say this."

Sam was crying now. "Ella, please, please don't leave me."

"Sam, you're such … a strong man, but …"

Sam tried to spare his wife from finishing. "I know what you're going to say, Ella."

"Just … love them, Sam, and … everything … will work out."

Sam finally confessed. "But I don't know how. I need you, Ella, please, please don't go."

Ella touched his cheek. "You know how, Sam … you … love … me, don't you?"

Sam was shocked and hurt she would ask that at a time like this, but she had to know. "With all my heart."

Ella touched his chest. "They're so young … please … just make … a little room … for them. I know … you can. I believe … in you … Sam." She closed her eyes feeling exhausted and ready to let go.

"Ella! Ella!"

"Tell them … I love them." Ella opened her eyes for just a moment and tried to smile. "Goodbye Sam, I … love … you." Her eyes closed forever.

"NO, NO, NO, NO!" Sam hollered and screamed to the heavens as he hugged his wife close to his chest and didn't let go.

"Daddy, Daddy, what's wrong, let me in!" It was Lois.

The tape stopped.

~o~o~

No one said a word for several minutes, each with their own thoughts about what they had just witnessed.

As Sam watched and listened to the tape, he felt as if a truck had rolled over his chest and crushed his heart into a million pieces. He hadn't heard or seen it in over fifteen years but the pain was still unbearable. My dear sweet wife is gone, gone forever.

Lois remembered and understood everything so much better now. Her father learned how to love from Mom, but when she left us, he didn't know how to do it without her, but knowing that didn't lessen her love for her father, it increased it a hundred fold.

Lucy felt the same way as her sister. Her father needed us just as we needed him for all these years, but too afraid and hurt to show it.

Sam couldn't bear the silence anymore, as he feared his daughters' retribution and tried to leave, to run away, but Lois stopped him. "Daddy, no more running away; no more, you can't leave, not now."

As tears streamed down his face, Sam turned from the door, wiped at his eyes, and waited for them to tell him how much they hated him.

Lois and Lucy slowly stood up and went to their father. "We love you, Daddy. We know you love us, but …" Lois said and then she took his hand. "We never realized how hard it's been for you."

Lucy took her father's other hand. "Mom wanted us to love each other, and we do, but sometimes it's hard to show that love," Lucy said.

Sam was so shocked and relieved they didn't hate him, that he let go of their hands and raised his hands to touch their cheeks, and then he pulled them both into his arms and held them close. "I'm so sorry, so, so sorry I hurt you. I didn't mean it, I didn't mean it," he managed to say between sobs, and they all cried harder hoping to reconnect, to be a family again like Ella wanted. They stood there holding and consoling each other for several minutes, as tears of love and relief flowed freely down their faces.

Lois pulled back after a moment. "Daddy, I have a question about Mom, and then we can say goodbye and never mention it again, if you don't want to."

"What is it honey?"

Lois spoke through her tears. "Was she in pain?"

Sam shook his head and held her close. "No honey, she was heavily medicated but her mind was clear. She knew what she was saying."

"I'm so glad you were there for her, Daddy," Lucy said.

"I just wanted more time with her, but … it was not to be. I wanted her to stay in the hospital, but your Mother insisted on coming home to be with us."

"Can we go downstairs and talk some more about Mom?" Lois asked wanting and needing to talk about her.

Sam hesitated but for a moment. "Of course we can talk about her and we should talk about her. Come on, I'll make coffee and we'll talk, but before we go downstairs, I have to say something." He pushed their hair back away from their faces and tried to smile. "Thank you both for not hating me. I know I've been a pain in the ass to live with, but I brought you up the way I was brought up, like my father was brought up. It was all I knew until your Mother entered my life."

"We know, Daddy, we all miss her very much," Lois said, understanding a lot of things now.

"I love you, Daddy. I love you, Lois," Lucy said needing to say it, as tears welled up and slid down her cheeks.

"Oh, sweetie, I love you too. I love you, Daddy," Lois managed to say between sniffles.

"Coffee can wait, come here, I love you both so much," Sam managed to say as he held tightly to his girls and then he closed his eyes for a moment. "Thank you, Ella," he whispered hoping she would hear him.

TBC!

##

A/N: *sobbing on her laptop* I hope it still works after this! Thanks for reading everyone. *wipes eyes* In the last chapter, Clark comes to visit the family. I hope that cheers everyone up for a minute or two! Please leave a review! Thank you.