6 Months Later
"Lexi will you be ready to go back to work after the birth?" Ethan asked tying his tie for his job. They were in their room. She stood up. Her swollen stomach stretching her t-shirt. He walked over and rubbed their baby. Felt an answering flutter.
"I still can't explain how amazing that feels." he whispered.
She smiled. "What happens if I crack up again?" she asked.
"To be honest if I had my way you'd never work their again but I know you honey. Eventually you'll regret not facing your fear and you know you were rushed back last time. I think you'll be fine. But you might need new uniforms if you don't lose your baby weight." he patted his child softly.
She frowned. "I dunno Ethan. What if I go to see Bob and it gets hurt?"
"Not it she." he reminded her.
"We don't know that!" they had declined finding out what they were having.
"I know we are having a girl ok!" he said confidently.
"I think it's a he." she declared. "My little Ethan Junior."
Ethan shook his head. "Stop changing the subject."
"Instead of going to see him I'll ring him ok."
"That's all I ask my love."
"Our house is nearly built I'm so excited!" she said.
Danny and Alice had paid for half of the house as a wedding present and Caroline and Dupe had deeded them the land. It had 3 bedrooms 2 bathrooms and was a little way away from leopards Den. They had been already to move into town but Danny had insisted he wanted her close. He wanted to be able to see her when he wanted but they had both said they couldn't live there. Alice had mentioned building a house and it had just snowballed.
"Well I gotta go earn the penny's honey." kissed her and their baby. "I can hardly wait to meet you but you gotta stay in there for another 2 months!" he said to their child.
He stood up and engulfed Lexi in a big hug. "In a months time you will be Mrs Ethan Bell I can hardly wait for that too!" kissed her passionately. "I'll see you later and I'll bring gifts!"
"Liquorice and vanilla ice cream?" she asked eyes lit up.
He grinned. "Liquorice yuck! Dunno how you eat it!" he pulled a face.
"Blame your daughter….or son." she added.
"Daughter!" he said. I'm sorry but I've got to go."
Walked out of the house quickly.
Lexi walked out of their room and saw her dad sat in the kitchen. He looked terrible. He looked tired.
"You ok dad?" she asked.
He faked a smile. It was strained. "Yeah Lexi how's my granddaughter?"
"Not you too!" she grumbled.
"He's adamant your having a girl you know. Said she's gonna be as beautiful as her mother and nana too!"
"To be honest I think if I do have a girl she'll look like us!"
"Your far too stunning to look like me. You inherited your looks from your mum. Your face is softer than mine and you have your mums sparkle, you just naturally gorgeous. Like she is. I see a lot more of her in your face as you get older. Especially now. Your face is filling out with your pregnancy and I can see your mum when she was pregnant with Daniel and Amie."
Lexi smiled.
"I gotta get down to the surgery. I'll see you later baby."
Lexi was left alone. Thought about work. She wanted to phone Bob and tell him she'd be back after the babies born but last time she had been near an ambulance she had cracked up! She thought back.
(X)
Lexi was riding her Mo-ped. She was apprehensive about where she was going. She was all healed now. And to quote martin the paramedic manager they weren't rushing her back but she knew how short staffed they were. So she had caved. Told them she'd come back. Even though she knew deep down she wasn't ready. She climbed off her bike and chained it up. Walked into the hospital smelled the antiseptic and felt a sharp pain in the region of her stab wound.
"Breathe lei!" she ordered herself. She out her stuff in her locker. The manager saw her.
"It's good having you back Lexi."
Shut up don't kid me. If I had a choice I'd still be at home. You rushed me back she longed to say. Except all she did was smile and nod. Walked towards hers and Bobs ambulance. Looked at the floor as she walked towards it. Looked up and froze when she finally saw I. one hand over her mouth and she was frowning. Eyes troubled. Winced as she remembered being sandwiched between a hard man body and a unrelenting door. Breathed heavily as she saw the knife above her. The inevitable feeling last lasted forever when she realised what he was gonna do. She was assaulted by memories. She couldn't escape them. Bob cam up behind her and she jumped.
"Martin told me you were back. You ready to go Lex?"
She walked slowly towards the door. Lifted her hand and placed it on the handle. Couldn't opened the door. Couldn't climb inside. Her green eyes distressed.
"Lexi?" Bob asked worried.
"I can't." she squeaked and ran towards the staff room. Bob found her curled up on a chair her face in her hands.
"I can't Bob. I can see him in there. I'm sorry but I'm scared!" she admitted voice shaking.
Bob hugged her close. "I knew that bastard rushed you back. Coz your one of the best we have!" he steamed. Pulled out his mobile rang a number. "Alice tell Ethan to come and get Lex. She's freaked out!"
That's how Ethan found her. Wrapped in Bob's arms.
"Lex?" Ethan asked. He had walked out of work and arrived at the hospital. Looking handsome apparently a nurse had told him. Other nurses just stared after him. He had ignored them.
She jumped into his arms. "I can Ethan. I can feel him in there!" she said voice still shaky.
"It's ok honey. Your fine." he soothed.
He kept his arms around her. "Tell that bastard martin that if I ever see him I'll kill him for the state she's in! she wasn't sure about coming back then she spoke to him and was like yeah it's time but I knew she had been coerced! And now this could out her back longer. I swear if he talks to her again before she's ready I'll kill him!" he hissed. The softly "C'mon Lex we'll go home yeah."
She nodded.
"Thanks for getting me Bob."
"No bother Ethan. Tae care of her."
He nodded and took her home.
(X)
She was sat lost in her thoughts of that time. What if that happened again? Was she ready to say her career as a paramedic is over before it had really begun? She loved her job. Loved helping people. But she couldn't deal with getting hurt again. Right she had to visit work. Had to speak to Bob again if she was gonna tell him she wasn't sure if she was coming back then she had to say sorry for abandoning him to his face. She was gonna be a mother soon. She couldn't risk her life when she had Ethan and her baby to think of! The hours she worked were too long anyway.
She pulled on her helmet on her moped. It was ok to ride as long as she was careful she rode along slowly. Saw a car had come off the road. She pulled off her helmet and put it on the handle of her moped.
"Hello!" she shouted.
Saw a woman with bad wounds lying on the floor by a bush. It looked like she had been mauled by an animal. A large animal! She used her phone to phone an ambulance and give their location.
"Miss, Miss can you hear me?"
No reply. Then "Lion" muttered softly.
Oh no! not a lion! Lexi thought. All this blood wasn't good. They could smell it miles away! She had no supplies. Tore a strip off the bottom of her t-shirt. Grabbed 2 pieces of wood. She had an open fracture.
"Look Miss I'm gonna have to fix your leg. But it's gonna hurt badly. Ok. Then after that I'll put on a tourniquet and a splint." she paused. "Miss?"
No reply.
She kept talking even though the woman was answering. "I'll do it on 3 ok. 1,2,3" she snapped the fracture back into place."
The woman's screams echoed through the bush. "Right I'm just gonna go in your pocket and see who you are ok?"
She had her hand in her coat pocket when a man appeared brandishing a blood smeared knife.
"Get away from her!" he snarled.
Lexi scrambled backwards across the mud. "I'm…I'm…" she spluttered. Her eyes never left the knife.
"She's injured and you do that and try to rob her. Your sick!" he knelt beside the woman who was unconscious.
She wrapped her arms around her stomach in protection.
"I…helped!" she squeaked.
He jumped up. Lexi jumped too. "She screamed!" he shouted.
"Open fracture." she whispered.
The man frowned. "You're a doctor?"
"Paramedic."
"Help her then!" he demanded.
Lexi shook her head, "Get rid of the knife!"
"It's the only protection we have!"
"I can't help her then!"
"Yes you will!" he walked towards her menacingly.
She put her hands up. "Ok ok just don't come near me!" she pleaded.
She went to the woman her movements short and jerky. The man lifted the knife when he saw his girlfriends tears.
"I can't think with that next to me!" Lexi said defiantly. "And unless you pout it down I won't help her!"
The man moved quickly. Grabbed her by the collar. Pulled her close to his face.
"Help her!" he yelled.
Lexi looked at the knife then the man. "I can't think with that thing next to me. My help is more of a hindrance if I can't think!"
The ambulance turned up.
Bob saw Lexi. A man had a knife close to her face. Her arms didn't protect herself but her child.
"Look sir we're here now. Just pout the knife down and let me help the woman!" he murmured.
The man dropped the knife and Lexi. Lexi exhaled in relief. Bob and his partner worked on her she was being loaded into the ambulance. Bob checked Lexi over.
"I want you checked at hospital you look too pale. And you!" Bob shouted to the an. "If Lexi hadn't of set the bone she would have lost the leg!"
Everyone had climbed into the ambulance. Lexi got on her moped and drove to hospital, went to the paramedics canteen. Needed 5 minutes peace and quiet. She walked in and felt a piercing pain in her abdomen. Last time she had felt anything even resembling this pain she had lost the baby! She fell to her knees as more sharp pains overcame her. She was about to call Ethan when another hit her more painful than the last. She lay on the floor in the canteen alone.
(X)
Ethan got a phone call.
"Hello Ethan."
"Ethan it's Bob get to hospital now it's Lexi and the baby!"
He dropped everything and made it to hospital quickly. A doctor met him when he made his way towards her room. "We're about to go into surgery. She had a placental abruption and has went into maternal shock. That is extremely dangerous to mother and child they each have a equal chance of survival." Ethan nodded.
"Shall we save mother or child? If it comes down to it?"
"What you want me to choose?" he squeaked. "My fiancé or my child?"
"Mr bell there is no time!"
"You do it. I love them both!" he hissed. "I refuse to chose!"
The doctor hurried away Ethan was given scrubs and went in. to keep Lexi calm.
"Ethan, I stupid!" she said.
"No honey." he whispered.
"I love you." she said. Then she was whisked away.
"I love you too!" he called after her.
Then he phoned her mum and dad/ who arrived in record time too.
An hour ticked by. A doctor came in.
"Mr Bell you are a father. 4ibs 2 ozs. A little girl." he went silent. "Unfortunately…"
"NO! No unfortunately!" he demanded breathing heavily.
"We were unable to save Alexis. She passed away 30 minutes ago."
Ethan's heart stopped. Physically stopped. He was frozen. Alice burst into tears. Danny sobbed along with her. Wrapped up in each other.
"Would you like to see your daughter?"
"No." Ethan said coldly.
"But…" the doctor started.
"No buts. I refuse to set eyes on her!" Breathing laboured.
"Ethan." Alice started. Tears in her eyes.
The doctor left the room.
Ethan paced. Wouldn't allow any tears to fall. his chest felt hollow, like it was about to cave in.
"She needs you!" Alice said through tears.
"She took her mothers life away!" he crumbled. "I took her mothers life away!" tears fell.
"Ethan this isn't." Danny started.
"Don't dare say this isn't my fault! If I hadn't got her pregnant then she'd still be here. If I hadn't coaxed her to visit work she'd still be here!" he cried harder.
Danny enveloped him in a hug. "Look mate your hurt and grieving but your daughter needs you. Lexi's daughter needs you! Sp pick yourself up and be the father she knew you could be!"
Ethan swallowed his tears and walked outside to talk to the doctor. He took him to the neo natal baby unit.
"She's at the back." the doctor said.
He stood at the doors. Watched as parents gushed over their children. His child at the back alone. Go on. Lexi urged him in his head. He walked towards her slowly. He stopped and looked. 2 months early and tiny. Just slightly bigger than his hand. The nurse handed him a bottle.
"Do you want to feed her?"
It was his job so he took the bottle and picked her up. It was like holding thin air. She latched on.
"That's a good girl!" the nurse said. "Early babies don't usually feed too well but she's doing really well there. She's been an angel for us so far!"
"Yeah." he said looking down at her. He wasn't blinking just staring at his and Lexi's chid. Heart full of emotion.
She finished her bottle and Ethan put her on his shoulder to get her wind up. Danny and Alice walked in.
"God look at her. She looks just like…" a few tears slid down Alice's cheeks. Ethan handed her to Alice. The baby looked at her with curious green eyes. Eyes he couldn't look at right now.
"I need to get her some stuff. Clothes."
"Caroline is bringing the 2 kids over with a bag of things. She said she'd pop into the shop and get a couple of early baby things too!" Alice rubbed the babies cheek with her finger.
He nodded absently. Stared at the baby.
"We haven't even picked a name for her. She was so sure we were having a boy."
"Do you have any names in mind?"
He shrugged. "Beth." the first name that came to his head. "Bethany Alexis Bell." he finally said.
(X)
Ethan shot up. Breathing heavily. Looked around. Saw Lexi lain in her hospital bed. Broken leg and all. He nearly burst into tears at the sight of her. He grabbed her hand. Pressed a kiss to it and exhaled noisily. That dream had scared the holy hell out of him. He had lost her. That dream was his nightmare. She was never going back to work ever! Not if he had any say in the matter. He refused to let some lunatic take her away from him. No sirree! She could do anything in the world but not her paramedics job. He was putting his foot down! HARD!
A/N I wrote this fully intending for Lexi to die then I realised she can't die you daft bat coz I need her in my next story. Dur dur head lol me and my lil convos wi myself they cn get a lil mad :D x