3 months Later
Lexi was ready to go back to work. She was fully healed. Mind and body. She had regained partial hearing in her left ear and she had a tiny hearing aid in there to amplify the noise so she was good to go. She knew if she didn't go back to work soon she'd be going on maternity leave. Plus Bob missed her. Hated his new partner. So now was the time. She was in their room pulling on her green uniform.
"I don't want you to go back!" Ethan said angrily.
"Why?"
"Need I remind you Lex?"
"And unless I go back now I never will!"
"Which would suit me just fine!" he told her. He hadn't told her about the nightmares that plagued him.
"Ethan why are you so dead set against me going back to work?" she tugged the zip up. It was snug over her abdomen.
"Coz I love you and I don't want you to be hurt!"
"Ethan I won't stuff like that rarely happens."
"I think you should change your career!" he said seriously.
"Ethan I'm a paramedic it's what I do!"
"Well do something else!"
"No I worked hard to get where I am and I refuse to give it up!"
"Even for me?" he retorted.
"Ethan don't do this to me. You know I don't react well to being pushed in a corner. I love you but I won't be emotionally blackmailed!"
"If you loved me you wouldn't put yourself or our child at risk!"
"Don't dare bring the baby into this. If there were any danger of it getting hurt you know I wouldn't be there! It was an isolated incident Ethan! "
They were silent.
"Did your mum work Ethan?"
"No, she had a job but gave it up when I was born."
"Interesting." Lexi murmured.
"What does that mean?" he asked.
"You want me to be like your mum. To be sat at home taking care of the kids all day and your willing to manipulate me to do it!" she said.
"No I'm not!" he defended himself.
A taxi beeped.
"Lexi please for me!" he pleaded.
"I love you." she said and hugged him. "But no."
"Lex if you walk out that door!" he warned.
She ignored him and walked out anyway. Ethan fumed. She had absolutely no consideration for his feelings at all. God every time his phone rang today he was gonna think it was someone telling him she was hurt he could see it coming!
(X) Meanwhile
Danny was sat in the kitchen. He watched Lexi storm out of the house and Ethan yell something. He ignored it. He took another tablet to try and keep him awake. Chased it down with strong black coffee. This wasn't working. He had to stop eventually. He was on the verge of collapse now. Alice walked in and kissed him.
"You didn't sleep well again huh honey?"
"I slept ok." he lied.
The nightmare just wouldn't leave him! It started now as soon as his eyes closed and grew more horrific and graphic. He shuddered involuntarily. Alice noticed it.
"Maybe you should see someone Danny." she suggested.
"Like a shrink. No way I'm not crazy!"
"Danny honey you need your sleep. I'm worried about your darling." she touched his face. "Life is good at the moment. I have you back! You can't even begin to understand what that means. Just getting to look into your green eyes one more day is a bonus. And you and Daniel are getting along so much better since he knows he's not your replacement. But Danny these nightmares are scaring me. Your shudders and twitches are increasing in intensity!"
"O yeah. Like they're a walk in the park for me?"
"Danny cut the sarcasm!"
"Well get out of my ear! I'm fine I can handle these nightmares ok!"
"How many times did you wake up last night?"
"Only twice!"
"Liar!"
"I swear on my kids lives I woke up twice!" spent the rest of the night awake but wouldn't tell her that.
"Danny…"
"Look Alice officially I don't even know if we're still married anymore so stop nagging me! You have no right coz your not my wife!"
"Actually officially I still am!" she said angrily.
"Well if you don't back off I'll have to remedy that!" he warned.
"Oh my god did you just threaten to divorce me?" she asked incredulous.
"Look honey please let me deal with this on my own!"
"And if I don't you'll divorce me?" she added for him.
"No."
"Well that's what you said my Danny would never have said that!"
"That's the point I'm not your Danny anymore. In a way he did die on the plane I'm a different man now! You need to get that Danny out of your head and learn to love me for who I am NOW!"
"I do love you!" she told him.
"But you don't know me!" he stressed.
"Yes I do!" she said. "I know enough!"
"Well you're a better person than me. 5 years is a lot of time and a lot of changes." he told her. "When you work in the surgery your different now. See unfortunately I stifled you. You always allowed me to lead. Now your much more likely to take charge of the situation. It has caused friction between us coz you've changed." he paused. "I don't know you anymore." he said softly.
"Coz your superman complex means you won't let anyone else save the day. Your right when I lost you I had to take charge. Be the head of the family. Be the head vet. I got stronger than I had ever been before. Without you. Coz no one was gonna do it for me. What was I supposed to do? Let our family fall apart? Let animals die? I did what I had to! And now your complaining about it, like it's an insult to you!"
"That's not what I'm saying at all. I just want you to know that we've both changed and I have an issue now but I can handle it!"
"I'm sick of arguing I want to help you but you obviously think you don't need it when it's so obvious you do!"
She left him with his thoughts then.
This was happening more and more. Alice had always been feisty and independent but since he'd been back they were getting in each others way. Or she got in his way! He had always been the one in control and suddenly she'd be right in there with him and it annoyed him. He understood but couldn't back off and neither could she. Until he told her to get lost out of his surgery. He'd seen her ready to go off then she had looked at the animal and stormed off. They'd had a steaming argument in their room that night which had quickly turned into something else. Lets just say that blouse. Ruined! That was the only thing they got right these days. He wasn't even sure if they worked anymore. Their changed personalities were far too similar. Take charge. Full steam ahead. While one of them needed to stand back. He couldn't do that and he couldn't expect Alice to either. It was a hard one. And his lack of sleep just exacerbated it. He wasn't sure about this talking lark anymore. Maybe if he told someone about this nightmare then it'd go away. He just needed to sleep once for a full night. He walked down to the surgery. The tablet wasn't working he felt heavy. He walked into the office and was looking at paperwork when the letters went blurry in front of his eyes. The paper slipped to the floor his head started nodding. He rested his arms on the desk without thinking. His eyes closed.
(X)
He and Alice were in their room. She looked at him with such love and passion. She took charge and kissed him. Thrust her tongue in his mouth. They were both wrapped up in each other. So much so he couldn't tell where he ended and she began. They were melded into one. He pushed her onto the bed and they tumbled giggling like kids. He touched her face. she looked like she was in pain then her skin turned black and fell off. She was fighting him trying to get him off her but his body was a dead weight and he couldn't move. He saw the devastation he was wreaking on her body. He looked at his hands, his arms and saw he was glowing. In flames. Alice lay still. Resembled the bodies on the plane. She was still. So still - dead. He was in shock at what happened. She opened her eyes suddenly. Looked at him with hate and malevolence.
"Look at what you've done to me!" she hissed as he climbed off her.
He was glowing red. Evil. She took a step towards him. Her once beautiful skin black.
"How could you?" She pulled her dark hair out and threw a chunk at him. he turned into ashes as it hit the floor infrotnt of him. Tore off her once beautiful soft porcelain skin and threw that at him too. It hung off places in her body. God he had destroyed her! Even her endless blue eyes were burnt. He was shocked. He felt sick. GOD!
He was unable to speak.
"Why didn't you die on that plane? We were happier!"
"What?" he asked broken.
"Yes happier! We never loved you. Ever!"
"Who is this stranger?" he murmured.
"I settled for you! I wish I hadn't! Look at what you did to me!"
"No!" he said heartbroken.
"Danny, Danny." a soft voice said. He felt his hand on his shoulder. "Careful honey don't…"
He went to turn and then opened his eyes.
(X)
Alice saw Danny asleep on his desk. She knew the instant his dream changed. he looked like he was in pain. Twitching. She knew she shouldn't touch him to try and wake him. She did that a few times and he always hit out. She hadn't told him this coz if he knew he'd move out of their room and she needed the closeness of his body. For however long they were together. She just had to be more careful.
"Stranger." he murmured.
Then no as a tear slid down his cheek. I'm sorry was torn from him. That was it she had to wake him. This wasn't going on any more. Her strong solid Danny was in tears. No she couldn't stand that! This dream was upsetting him.
"Danny, Danny." she said putting her hand on his shoulder.
She was expecting an arm to hit out. But the opposite arm hit to the one she was expecting. She was ready to duck expecting a right. But his left flew from beneath her and connected with her jaw. Sent her flying backwards across the room. Hit her head off the filing cabinet. Her back hit the cabinet with such force it made her fall forward she lay on her stomach still.
(X)
Danny's arm hit out and his eyes flew open. He saw Alice's shocked face as his forearm connected with her jaw. Watched her fly across the room. Saw her wince as the back of her head hit the corner of the filing cabinet. Her hands flew to the back of her head. Watched as her body fell to the floor in slow motion. She lay still. He was straight on his feet by her side. Checked the back of her head. A small cut which was surrounded by a bump. Turned her over. A red mark over her jaw. And a bump on her head.
Her eyes fluttered.
"Danny?" she asked. Softly.
"Your ok honey." he murmured.
"Why am I on the floor?" she went to sit up and grabbed the back of her head in pain. Her hand came away wet and she looked at the red blood.
"What happened?" she asked.
"Sit still." he coaxed. Picked her up and deposited her gently on the leather chair. Gave her a cold compress. She pressed it to the back of her head. Opened up the first aid kit. He felt like the biggest bastard alive. God he was hitting the people he loved now! She looked so pale. But then looked up at m and smiled. She smiled at him.
"I love your eyes when they are intense Danny. They look so gorgeous. Your gorgeous to me anyway! I love you so much" she said in low husky tones.
"Alice it would be best if you weren't anywhere near me!" he was sat behind her dabbing at the cut ion her head. God that sentence made the guilt worse. He brains almost into next week and she tells him she loves him!
She looked back at him and smiled blankly. Leaned back. "I'll always be near you. I'll never stop loving you. I'm gutted at the way we've been arguing recently and want us to go back to the way we were so badly!" still in her husky tone.
Maybe she was concussed. Should he take her to hospital? He used an antiseptic wipe on her head.
"Ow Danny that freaking stings!" her blue eyes cloudy.
He sat up and blew softly.
"How old am I 5?" she asked him.
He grinned at her tone. "Your definately not a child honey!"
The blood had stopped. She didn't need stitches.
"That's good to know honey." she told him. Stood up. Closed the blinds and the door and walked towards him.
"You know we never broke in our office." she murmured.
He dived behind his desk.
"No way Alice."
"Why not it'll be fun!" she murmured. Leaned over the desk and smiled at him seductively.
Danny felt himself falling into her eyes. She started moving towards her slowly. He blinked and came to his senses as she had him enclosed in her arms.
"Alice we can't anyone could come in. what if a animal needs us?"
"That didn't stop us in Bristol!" she murmured in his ear.
His face heated as he remembered that day. They just exploded. One second they were scrubbing the operating table and before they knew it she was sat on it and…
"Honey you have a possible head injury. You shouldn't be saying stuff like this!"
"Your no fun!" she grumbled. Opened the blinds and the door.
"So what happened since we're not gonna….play."
"I've changed my mind we'll play." he said.
She shook her head. "Tell me!"
His face which looked guilty to begin with turned worse. His green eyes full of self derision. "I hit you!"
Her jaw dropped. "No way. I don't believe you!"
"It's true, I hit you and you fell and hit your head off the filing cabinet. You were unconscious for about a minute."
"Did I…" God she nearly asked him if she deserved it. Like it condoned him hitting her. Just so they could forget about it and push it under the rug. Pretend it never happened. She had no idea what to do!
"Why?" she asked pained.
"You came behind me when I was asleep. Touched my shoulder. I lashed out and hit you."
She breathed in relief. So he hadn't meant it. "OH don't worry about that honey. You almost hit me before. I just mustn't moved in time!"
His face turned furious. "What? I've almost hit you before. And you never thought to tell me?"
"I didn't think it mattered!"
"O and if I had injured you would that have mattered Alice?" he fumed.
"No. coz I still love you. Coz all that matters is that you will never her me intentionally!"
"I can't stay with you if I'm harming you. Your too important to me for you ever to hate me!" he said passionately.
"I'll hate you if you go!"
"I'll hurt you if I stay!" he replied.
"Not if you confide in me. Make me understand!"
He looked at her. Opened his mouth. Then clamped it shut. "NO!" he demanded and stomped from the surgery.
A/N oh danny danny danny typical tryin 2 deal with it alone wen he really needs help. silly bullheaded man grrr lol :D x