Cruise Control

I sat on the edge of the hospital bed freshly showered, with my hair still damp and changed into clothing that was my own. In my lap I held the empty plastic bag that the clothes had been brought to me in.

"You okay?" I looked up to see Sandy standing there just inches away from me, I went to tell her that I was fine, but before I could utter a word she covered my lips with her hand. "Don't lie to me."

I let out a sigh when she removed her hand and placed it down gently on my right shoulder, then followed that by placing her other hand on my left. I leaned forward and rested my forehead against her chest, releasing another sigh. "I won't get to see him before I leave."

I wasn't sure she even heard me until she slid her arms around me, "You'll see him tomorrow, baby. Even the doctor said-"

"They don't know everythin'." Tomorrow could be too late. By tomorrow, he could be gone and I could never tell him how sorry I am. By, tomorrow I could never ever see him again. "Another operation in less than two days, 'andy."

And I didn't even know what for...

"I haven't got to see 'im sin-since..." The accident I caused. I couldn't even say it out loud, I couldn't even speak about the reason my baby brother was on the operating table – again and it was all because of me.

Sandy didn't speak for a long time, she didn't have to. There was nothing she or anyone could say that would make me feel better – nothing.

The door opened a couple minutes later and Darry came in looking, if even possible, more worn out than he was before. "Got you signed out." He said, jerking a thumb over his shoulder to the doorway, where a nurse was, holding onto the handles of a wheel chair. "Hop on buddy."

I gave her the best grin I could muster, "I don't need tha-" I started but the nurse quickly cut me off, she was an older lady who wasn't going to fall for any of my charms.

"Hospital rules."

I bit my tongue and did as I was told – thankfully Sandy was allowed to push me out.

The second we exited the sliding glass doors, I jumped out of the wheelchair and onto my feet. I didn't like that at all, not one bit...

Ponyboy will be stuck in one of those for the rest of his life. The thought crossed my mind before I even realized it did and all I could do then was stare at the thing like it was a gift from the Devil himself.

"You alright there Pepsi?" Darry came up to me and placed a hand on my shoulder, all people seemed to do when they saw me now. "You're lookin' a lil' pale..."

I shook his hand off. "'m fine, Dar. Lets get outta here." I tried not to look back at the chair but I couldn't help it, however when I turned around it was gone – the nurse had pushed it back inside the building.

For a moment I was thankful she had, but the guilt from that pulled at me.

When we pulled away from the hospital, Sandy sitting in between me and Darry, I drew my attention to the large brown bricked building that sat in the middle of town.

Ponyboy was in here somewhere.

...and I was leaving him behind.

As we drove down the streets towards the house, it was only Sandy who spoke. From time to time Darry would reply to something she said but he was mostly silent along with me. I hadn't turned away from the window this entire time.

It felt like an eternity had passed by the time we finally reached the house. Once Darry pulled up to the curb, I had the door of the truck open and if it wasn't for Sandy's hand that was in mine, I would've hopped out before it was even in park.

For a moment I remembered to be a gentleman and helped my girlfriend out of the truck but that was all I was able to do because suddenly I was pulled away and swung around – much like that a man coming back from the army would do to his lady – but my ribs weren't liking it one bit.

"What a sight for sore eyes!" I didn't see him but by the voice I knew right away who it was.

"Put me down, Two-Bit!" I was able to grunt out between the lack of air and the pain coming from my midsection.

"Oh shit man!" He cursed and quickly dropped me, "I forgot. Crap. Sorry."

I tried to grin through the pain – it wasn't happening. "It's fine." I huffed out but I doubt he had even heard me with Darry hollering at him.

Sandy lead me inside and that's when I noticed Steve. I hadn't seen him since the accident either, I had been passed out when he came by to see me before he was released. "Hey buddy." He said and that moment I ignored to pain to hug my best friend.

"You're alright." Was all I could say, it was one of those you got to see to believe things. I knew he was alright, everyone told me so but I had to see for my own eyes that he was.

We pulled away "Yeah man." - I looked over him and the only physical evidence of the accident was the cuts and bruises all on his skin. Many of them had started to heal over the nearly three days since the wreck.

"Cut on your cheek makes you look pretty tuff."

"I'd say the same for you, but I know your fan club will have a heart attack if they saw your face right now." He grinned at me and I rolled my eyes when I heard Sandy's remark about that being a favor.

"You!"

My head snapped up at the voice, a voice I had been praying I wouldn't hear for a few days; it was Dallas Winston.

He was hobbling down the hallway, his foot foot inside a thick – orange – cast. "You lil' bastard!" If I wasn't scared for my life I would have thought that this was the funniest thing ever, "I'm gonna kill you, you lil' shit!"

That's when Johnny stepped out from the kitchen with something in his hand, "You ain't 'pose to be walkin' on your foot, man." I saw that he had a pair of crutches in his hands and handed them over to the blonde hood.

Whatever steam Dally had been working with obviously ran out, with one cold glare to Johnny and then to me, he grabbed them and hobbled out the door cursing at me under his breath.

"Thanks, Johnnycakes." I gave him a smile but he didn't look up at me to noticed. "Saved my life."

"Yeah well..." He mumbled stuffing his hands in his pockets, "I'm gonna go see if Two-Bit has any smokes." and with that he was out the door – not once had he looked at me.

What the...

"He saw it all." Steve answered my unasked question. "He saw it when he kid got hit." He grabbed a beer bottle that was sitting on the coffee table surrounded by others, "Messed him up pretty bad, he's been weird since."

Shit.

I collapsed onto the couch and rubbed my eyes roughly with the palms of my hands. "How bad...was it?" I asked him.

Steve just shrugged, "I was in the car with you." Of course, I felt stupid for asking him that question. "No one talks about it much."

The accident had happened Friday night and we're at Monday afternoon, it was still too fresh and painful for everyone and here I was pushing for answers when all this was my fault anyway.

"I didn't see much myself," Sandy started when she sat down beside me a cold beer in her hand, "Two-Bit had knocked me and Evie out the way. But I remember the look on John-boy's face," I smiled softly at the name. It was something the girls had taken to calling him since he and Ponyboy are so close. "It was bad."

I didn't ask anything else after that – I just grabbed the small paper bag that contained my prescription, and went into my room.

After shutting the door behind me, I leaned against it and shut my eyes.

This is too much...way too much.

I opened my eyes, my sight locking onto the shelf at the coner of the room. There rested metals and trophies – a few were mine but most of them were for Ponyboy.

The majority of them were for track, he also had some for things like swimming, baseball and basket ball that he dabbled in when he was in middle school. God, my baby brother was a natural when it came to things but it was track that caught his full attention.

Track.

I went over to the self and fingered one of the trophies.

Track.

"God..." I sobbed, not realizing the tears falling from my eyes until that moment. Darry told me his legs were gone, just gone. He wouldn't be able to do what he loved anymore.

Track.

What he loved and lived for...

"What have I done..."

Wanted to update quickly because I felt that the last chapter felt too incomplete, plus the 17 reviews in less than 24 hours were nice too. Thanks to everyone for reading and adding to your favorites too.