Disclaimer: I can't claim Naruto – even in my raise of pay for babysitting. I'm still a poor teenager… Damn. Thank you to my THIRTEEN reviewers that I love completely. I would like to thank the following for reviewing: fabmab of the Sand (new member reviewer), Sensei's Panda (dedicated, non-member reviewer who rocks), Rabid Cream Puffs (new member reviewer who apparently likes the story), Priestess-of-Jashin (my dear, inspiring friend from FL who pwns and reviews constantly), Jaygrl22 (new member reviewer with enthusiasm), Rima-chan (non-member reviewer that adores my story when school is out), Shiningheart of ThunderClan (newer dedicated member reviewer that has a good sense of sarcasm), SilentPerson (non-member reviewer that can't spell but is forgiven for the flattery and has a very literal pen-name), aquamarine-acaia (member reviewer who rocks for thinking I'm funny), mizar (member reviewer who has forgotten their password and therefore is a non-member viewer who is amazing for flattering me so), gaaraxoxo (whom is a dedicated member reviewer that is awesome!), and Blazirene (new member reviewer that gave me my 41st review!). Lastly, I want to thank aodvampriss666 for giving me the longest review I have ever seen. You're completely amazing, thank you so much! Wow. Really long list, ne? Let us get started! Also, I listened to a mix CD my friend made me, which includes a lot of old Eminem. So enjoy, my friends! Look out for a shock… Maybe…
"Hey, Akio-sama…" I heard the nervousness in Kane's voice.
When my brother told Kane to tell him what he was apprehensive about I smirked and tugged on Gaara's arm. I fled up the stairs, the dazed redhead following me without rebuttal. We ended up in the room, which was the last on the left of the second floor that I had never actually entered. I have, however, stood in the doorway repeatedly and told Gaara to come out or that I was bored. Actually, I usually told him both.
Downstairs, I heard my brother explode. He probably burst into the kitchen screaming, only to realize I had disappeared. If Temari said anything about Gaara's room, I would forever tease her about Kane. I was already planning her demise when my silent boy spoke with a shaking voice.
"What…did you say down there?" Gaara's voice was quiet, and somehow stiff and shaking at the same time.
My face relaxed, knowing Gaara was shocked and confused. I sat next to him, leaning against the wall beside his perfectly made bed. I wondered if he ever even used it…
Placing a hand on his arm, awaiting his breathing to slow and his mind to accept that I loved him, I spoke. "Gaara-kun, we've been friends for a while. Not too long, really, but long enough. And I do love you, so just accept this. Look, this is probably really hard to understand. I don't really get it myself. So, point being, I love you. If you ask me why I can name a million reasons about how amazing I think you are and you still wouldn't get it. So I won't really bother. I don't expect you to act on it or pretend that you love me too, I just thought you had a right to know about someone being in love with you."
Lazily, I leaned my head on his shoulder again. Gaara was ridged and unspeaking, taking it all in silently. I waited for him to say something patiently. Also, I ignored the banging around and shouts going on down stairs. They were geeks.
I heard my brother's footsteps coming up the stairs not too long afterwards. "Gaara-kun, I have to go. I'll see you later." My hand brushed his cheek and I stood, walking out before my heart choked me. Maybe later I could come in and live around him without feeling as if my heart was exploding repeatedly.
Akio stood outside the door, just about to open it. I could already tell he was fuming. The door closed silently behind me. I shook my head at Akio, telling him that we could talk at home. Kio-sama glared heavily at me and stalked down the stairs. The door slammed before I was half-way down the stairs. Temari and Mori rushed to my side, but I told them I'd call them later. Mori pouted but hugged me on the way out. Kane walked silently by my side on the way back to my apartment, the anger of my brother hung really heavily on us both. I didn't comment on the fact that he was the one that said something – I was to busy thinking about what I'd told Gaara and his lack of reaction.
My driveway was empty this time, much to my pleasure. Akio was sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee, sipping at it angrily. Kane sighed and plopped next to him after getting a cupcake from my refrigerator. I wondered where all this weird food was coming from but didn't comment. This was not something I was looking forward to, to be honest.
"Aya, did you tell Gaara you love him?"
"Yeah, Kio-sama."
"Why?" His voice steeled, and I prepared for the worst after my reply.
"I do love him, Akio. He had a right to know that someone was in love with him, even if he didn't plan to return the feelings anytime soon. Wouldn't you want to know if someone loved you like that?"
The fight washed out of his eyes as he stared at me.
"I would."
"Then what else do you have to say?"
"I don't want you to get hurt. You need to keep yourself safe, and let your friends help you. Since you really love him, I want you to be happy. However, if I don't like this I have the right to threaten him." I struggled to keep a straight face at the thought of Gaara' stoic face while my brother screamed in his face. I know Gaara wouldn't care about anything Akio said when it came to threats and me.
Knowing saying anything like this would immediately result in the withdrawal of his support, I just nodded. "I get it, Kio-sama."
With the awkward silence, Kane decided we were going to watch his favorite movie for the millionth time. I didn't care, at least it was a good, humorous movie; even if I have seen it so many times I can quote every line, I like it too. I just laughed and plopped on the couch as Kane slid it into the DVD player. I really wished Tim Burton would re-do this. It is a classic, but my idol could do so much with this movie. With Johnny Depp as Jareth of course… As always, the movie began with Sarah's wishful thinking. I settled in for the long, magical showing of The Labyrinth with David Bowie.
A while later, somewhere between the Bog of Stench and that song I really love but has a creepy scene, Kane fell asleep and I let my mind wonder. Surprisingly, I was not thinking of my silent boy. Instead, I was remembering moments from when I lived with my parents. It seemed like a world and a half ago, but it wasn't too long ago. The first thing I thought of was around four months after my brother moved out and a week before I moved out. I was a slightly angry twelve-year-old that missed her brother and best friend after moving away again. That day I came home from school in a great mood – something rare – to see my house empty. That immediately put me in an even better mood. I didn't know where my sister was and I didn't care. So I spent an hour online and relaxing. That was the last time I was ever happy staying at my parent's house. After that, I figured out the boy I was dating was screwing my slu-…sister, I mean. I moved out real quick after that, leaving them behind after renting an apartment under my parents' name. I was relieved to be out of there and emailed my brother my address as soon as the Internet was hooked up in my new house. Aunt Aiko helped me set up for a couple days, and enrolled me in Kohana High. Mori didn't know I was in town until the night before school started. She adored her surprise, and I had just been hoping school would be okay. It turned out better than expected…
The next thing I thought of was about a week or two after my brother moved out, when he called me for the first time. That day I had been hanging out in the park, texting Mori and swinging. Well, and trying to avoid my house… Point being, I was at the park Akio always used to take me when we had to talk about something horrible, amazing, or serious.
I always told my mother she should answer random, non-salesmen numbers that called her phone. She never listened to me. Once, it turned out to be her brother coming in from Suna. She still never listened to me, and I was never one to follow my parents' suit (even if they hated that completely). Therefore, when a random number flashed across my screen, I answered without hesitation. On the phone was my brother, who informed me he was in the Land of Waves. Kane was hollering in the background, telling Kio-sama to 'tell Papaya hello and he miss-es-es her very much!' I remember snickering at him and by the time the phone call was over, I was laughing so hard tears fell from my eyes and onto my lap. That little call left me swinging higher and plotting ways to leave home. Mori provided me with a desired location, if only I got the chance.
Shaking myself into the present, I looked around. In my daze, Kane had fallen off the couch and onto my coffee table. He was now drooling on it. Damn idiot, I thought fondly. My brother was no better, laying on the loveseat with his feet on Kane's face. I snickered at the two and headed to the kitchen. I had a feeling sleep would not come easily tonight.
While humming the song "I'm Blue" to myself, I lifted a small basket that contained various bottles of medicine and a box or two of neon colored band-aids from the top of the refrigerator. The tiny bottle of sleep aid stayed in my hand when the basket was replaced on top of the fridge. I swallowed two of them with a handful of cold water from the sink, forgetting my bottled water for a moment. Just as I flicked off the kitchen light, someone knocked on the door. I looked at my cell – it was almost four in the morning. There was only one person I knew of who bothered to visit me this early…or late? Which was the correct period anyway? I briefly wondered if Kane would know the answer.
Ignoring the confusing time frame, I opened the door. Gaara stood in the cold, his face cast downward so I couldn't see it. A smile spread across my lips. I couldn't help it; he looked so shy and vulnerable. I'd never seen that before, but it was…cute. Tugging on his arm, I pulled him inside and closed the door. Shutting the door to the fridge from getting another of my endless supply of water bottle, I motioned for him to come through the living room down the hallway with me. He followed me to my room without protest or anything at all.
I sat on my futon, looking at Gaara, who just stood leaning against my very decorated wall. His arm lay against a Panic! at the Disco poster, while the mane of red hair – that was so lush and soft – rested on white silk wall hanging with a giant L on it. Even after my obsession with a certain anime's great detective ended, I kept the hanging as a symbol of my past. Waiting for him to answer, I hit play and FallOut Boy's 'Tell Mick He Just Made My List of Things to Do Today' played its up-beat notes.
"So you have something to say?" My voice was low, finally expecting the worst outcome possible. I steeled my heart in preparation of disappointment and a long, long wait I was sure would come.
"Aya-chan, you're my best friend. I don't know how to feel anything else with you. But I don't think that means I couldn't learn. So just give me some time."
My breath hitched and I looked at him in wonder. That was not what I expected from him at all. With shy, lovely eyes, he raised his gaze to mine. Something behind that shyness, something natural and almost loving, made my heart flip repeatedly. This boy should be illegal for me… Luckily, he wasn't. "So, you…may like me?"
His face became considerate, close to teasing. If he was going to continue at this rate, I may as well be seeing and/or hearing things that I really, really wanted to. Yeah… Lock me up and throw away the key because this answer had to be an amazing, happy figment of my over-active and crazed imagination. Unless this was a dream and I had actually fallen asleep. In that case, damn reality to Hell and back! Why did reality always have to interfere with my life? I sighed to myself. Gaara's words replayed in my head.
"I may learn to love you. I can't promise anything though."
My sister's face, lovely and smug and smiling, flashed in my mind. I had no doubt she would find something to lure him towards her, and it scared me to no ends. Suddenly – selfishly – I wished Gaara would just learn to love me now. I wondered if there was some way to speed up the process without ruining it… I found none, but saw a few chances that may be worth taking. Only one stuck out. And I knew it was my only chance as he sat down on the futon, so close to me. "Gaara… Do you…trust me?"
I hate, hate, hated myself for what I was about to pull. It was deceiving and wrong, even if I wanted it so much and finally had a legit reason to do it.
On the drive home
Joke about the kid you used to see
And his jealousy
Breaking hearts has never looked
So cool…
I shivered at the perfect time of the words. I was learning just how philosophical any band could be nowadays.
"Of course." My silent boy's husky voice held nothing but truth and I was sent into a pit of self-loathing at that. He turned towards me, his head slightly cocked to the side. Damn it! He was making this so easy… I took a deep breath and returned his gaze.
"Then do me a favor. However, if you agree to do this, you must also agree to never hate me and never hold it against me. I feel horrible enough as it is. So just…yeah."
Gaara looked at me with a confused expression, and I didn't blame him. "Okay."
So, whenever my silent boy continued to gaze at me with an incredibly incredulous expression on his attractive face, I did exactly what I loathed myself for doing. No matter how right this felt, I knew it was before his time and therefore not exactly a great thing for me to do…
As soon as I leaned forward, my eyes closed tightly so I didn't have to watch myself commit an unforgivable crime against the person I loved, my mind cleared itself almost completely. When I felt my lips brush his, it was almost exactly like all the love songs and stories described it was. The sensitive skin over my lips sent tingles all throughout my body, not forgetting a single spot. Every cell in me felt it, but there were no fireworks and explosions in my mind. Instead, I felt overwhelmingly whole. Totally complete and utterly happy.
Gaara went rigid, but our lips didn't part and he didn't run away from it. Once my lips pressed a little harder on his, I felt something like returning pressure. Instead of sighing and/or other things that would certainly make him pull away, I pressed harder than before one more time and leaned away from him. Without looking, I immediately knew my face had flushed horribly and my lips were a bit swollen from the unusual pressure applied to them a mere moment ago. Please, whatever-deity-exists; don't let my silent boy hate me for that.
This is side one, flip me over
I know I'm not you're favorite record…
Ooooh. Sorry for the shortness. You should be happy! From the beginning I had planned to have them kiss in lucky number thirteen. I hope the kiss wasn't horrid, and you enjoyed! So…review, loves!