I had never been so far away from the tribe. Out here the vegetation grew wild and untamed, and I had the uncontrollable urge to touch everything despite A'mari'k's warnings.

"The journey to the Thundering Rocks will take a day at best, perhaps even two," A'mari'k told me as we stealthily maneuvered ourselves across the forest floor. Vines, branches, fallen logs, puddles and poisonous plants littered the path, making every step a potential deathtrap. I was not used to this at all, so I was very slow. Thankfully, A'mari'k did not seem to mind.

I could barely see light here, and it scared me. Was it not still morning? Why does Eywa's light not reach here? A'mari'k's back flickered in and out of my vision as he moved in front of me. He was moving too fast, but I did not dare ask him to slow.

Stray branches and undergrowth caught at my beads. They were Paiiyi's gift to me and I should have reconsidered wearing them out. It would be a sad thing indeed if these beads torn, but it was I who was too vain.

At first I'd imagined we would have a lot to talk about, but it seemed A'mari'k was a man of few words. He had changed since our first encounters. He used to be silly, stupid and seemingly incapable, but now I saw him in a completely different light. I supposed one gained a certain maturity from power and responsibility.

Suddenly, a rough hand grabbed my arm, pulling me back.

"Yishat," A'mari'k whispered, "You are moving too fast. When I stop, you stop. Understand?"

I flushed despite myself. "Yes, brother. Why are we stopping?" With a frown, I discovered we were facing a small tree. It seemed like any other common tree, so I looked towards A'mari'k for explanation.

"Cast your eyes here, sister, and see the nest." A'mari'k pointed to a bunch of sticks and twigs in a ridge between a branch and the trunk. I frowned; I did not understand.

"I see it."

"Try to climb up and look into it. Go. I'll be waiting here." He nodded with the most solemn expression on his face. I did not know what to do. Was this supposed to be a joke? I approached the tree cautiously; aware I was surely being tested for something. The nest was actually not very far off the ground, so I only needed to stand on the soles of my feet to see into it. The light was not very good here, but I managed to make out the outline of a big, fat bird and a chick. The bird was of a very dark color, but to my surprise the chick was bright red. Its color was so bright that light almost emanated from its feathers.

I looked back at A'mari'k and laughed wearily, "I don't understand."

A'mari'k chuckled and sat gingerly upon a rock. He motioned to one next to him. "Let's take a rest, Yishat. I will explain."

I did as I was told gingerly, feeling the hairs in the back of my neck standing up. Once I was seated, A'mari'k faced me and asked me if I loved my sister.

I was astounded, but tried to keep my reactions in check. "Of course, she is my sister after all!" Where was he trying to go with this?

"Then let me tell you the story of this particular bird, Yishat." A'mari'k stretched his arms and laughed at the confused expression on my face. "It has nothing to do with the mission, but we've been making good progress. I think you should know this story."

I was not told stories often nowadays, so I was not sure what to expect. I nodded anyway.

"The Sphamik bird here lives very long, but unfortunately she has chosen a very bad place to set up nest. You see, often times at night this particular spot is overrun by Nantang. Its nest is often attacked, but it does not leave to rebuild."

"Why?"

"Because she is waiting for her mate."

"So where is he?" I wasn't sure if A'mari'k was making this up or telling the truth. Either way it seemed completely unrelated to our lives in general. I was becoming impatient. Just how far have we come? I could tell the time from under this thick canopy of trees.

A'mari'k seemed to have sensed my restlessness but only continued, "He has been killed elsewhere."

"Alright… So…"

Here he leaned forward so that our faces were so close together, I could feel his breath. It smelled pleasant. "So this bird cannot reproduce without its mate, but she wants to please him when he returns. What does she do, then? She steals the chicks from other birds' nests and cares for them as if they were her own."

I understood now. He was trying to link this back with Ma'hi. I leaned back to put some distance between us. "What are you saying then, brother? I am too old for stories."

A'mari'k swatted away a bug that landed on his shoulder, and together we watched it buzz away. After a credible silence, he stood up and faced me. "I have been thinking about the request you posed to me last night. I think you do not understand the situation."

Energy pulsed through me like a living being, making my head pound with anger. I frowned, standing up as well. I was still more than a head shorter than A'mari'k but at least I was not sitting. "Are you saying you do not pray to Eywa every day for a son? Isn't that the basis of the situation with Ma'hi?" I made the mistake of pointing at him rudely.

My offending finger was immediately seized and the hold around it tightened until I yelled in pain. A'mari'k's face towered over mine, his hot breath on my face. "I do want a son, Yishat. But Ma'hi is my mate and if Eywa wishes for me to have no son, then be it. I argue with Ma'hi because she was harming herself in attempts to conceive. She even suggested she conceive by another! I will not blame her since she is obviously in an unstable state of mind, but understand that it is not I who wants a child so desperately, Yishat, it is she! You think I am selfish, girl? You think I am a traitor to Eywa like Tsu'tey?"

My eyes widened at the mention of the name I'd fought to forget. I registered various degrees of confusion and shock at the words before that, but it all went blank at the mention of that one name. "What about Tsu'tey?" I growled lowly. "You know something, A'mari'k. What do you know?"

He seemed to have regretted his words, for he pulled away from me and shook his head, whipping his braid about. "Never mind, it was a slip of the lip. I apologize."

Caught within a sudden rush, I grabbed A'mari'k by the throat and wrestled him down onto the ground. He had not tried to defend himself, so he went down easily.

A'mari'k looked up at me with amusement. "So Tsu'tey is so important to you, is he, Yishat? I bet this is why you chose me to escort you to the mountains instead of the Olo'Eytkan? My braid reminds you of him, doesn't it?"

I felt as if I was about to scream. "Don't change the subject, brother. If you love me like a sister, you will not let me suffer like this!"

"How are you suffering then, dear sister?"

When I could not give a reply, A'mari'k propped himself up beneath me and slid from under my grasp like a slippery water snake. "Calm, Yishat. Here Eywa's light does not reach you, but she is all seeing." I could not see his face as he spoke, but his touch was chillingly gentle. "I just wanted you to know the truth behind Ma'hi and I. Now you must not tell anyone. I see you are still a child. You harbor much hate and distrust in you, and such is not the Na'vi custom."

But it was you who inspired such hate in me once again. What could I say to him? Should I believe him at all? Should I pursue the subject of Tsu'tey or leave it be? And what of Ma'hi? I could never believe she would ever try to conceive by another! It was just not done in Na'vi custom…. Not ever. I was on the verge of something here, but I felt a loss within myself. My balance had been shattered so easily by the mention of that one damned name. I felt as if I no longer had control of my anger any more, that all the negativity had returned to me. I no longer wanted to continue on this journey. "Thank you, brother."

I did not know him after all.

-x-

"Be careful. The cliff is very sheer."

"Yes, brother."

"Go, then."

Stepping out from between the thundering waterfall, I swallowed thickly as I took in the sight of so many Ikran at once. It was a surreal sight, and it made my legs shake. I was glad I was the only one here, for if I had gone with Jakesully I would probably be dying of embarrassment by now.

The air atop the mountains was crisper, easier to breathe. A'mari'k warned against the tendency to take too many breaths, for it would make one light headed. I tried to control my breathing as I carefully moved across the jagged outcrops that made up the ground. My feet were not used to such environments and immediately began to chafe. The Ikran population had its eyes on me, but none flew away. How was I supposed to do this now, when none of them see me as a threat?

"Go on!" I heard A'mari'k hiss at me from beyond the falls, his voice almost blending into the sound of the rumbling water. "Make some noise! They're not used to such a small party!"

I had not needed to do anything. At the sound of his voice the Ikran stirred and some began to screech. Soon the entire population of Ikran on this mountain began to scream, and with a flurry of wings and talons, flew to attack me. I had the air knocked out from my lungs as I was flung to the ground. "A'mari'k!" I shouted, very much distressed. Was this supposed to happen?

I heard him shout back, "I cannot help you!"

Thanks, brother dearest.

Realizing I was going to be alone in this, I grappled for my knife. I always kept it with me in a holster on my hip, although it was not very sharp at all. This was a skinning knife that all home tenders were expected to use. The knife was built to slice through skin only so that the meat was not harmed. The Ikran pounced onto me, its rancid breath polluting the air, and in reaction I drew my dagger and slashed it clean across its face. Immediately my heart felt like it was tearing- oh, Eywa! I had not meant to do this! I felt the pain of the creature coursing through me, making me drop the knife over the edge of the cliffs almost involuntarily.

The Ikran roared and looked as if it was going to attack, but instead drew back. At the smell of blood, the rest of the huge beasts grew unsettled, and soon I found myself wrestling those who were charging me. I heard A'mari'k shout my name and realized I was too close to the edge. I tried to maneuver myself back into safety but one push from the Ikran's mighty brow and I was sent tumbling down the cliff.

I started to scream, only to find myself back on the cliff. The Ikran that pushed me tilted its head. A'mari'k started to laugh. This Ikran must have pulled me back when he realized I was falling!

I gave a small laugh, but it turned out to be more like a whimper. All or nothing, then. With something akin to a battle cry, I launched myself forward and took hold of the Ikran's thick neck. It howled and I used the forward motion of the muscle to kick myself up onto its back. It flung me off easily, and once again I heard A'mari'k shouting something urgent to me. I could not make out exactly what he was saying, for I'd hit my head on the ground and my eyesight began to fail me.

I think I may have slipped into unconsciousness for a moment. For that moment I reverted back to the time Ma'hi returned from her journey, a huge smile splitting her face. She was holding a length of rope which she asked me to dispose of immediately.

With renewed energy I sought for the rope I now distinctly remember A'mari'k handing to me. I had experience with the bola catcher. I played with it as a child to trap small animals and knew how it worked. The sinuous bola stretched to accommodate everything and anything it was catching, making it an indispensable tool for hunting. I almost did not manage to reach it in time but the Ikran lost its focus for a moment and I snapped the catcher onto its face and wrestled it once again to the ground with the last of my strength.

Something was covering my face. I moved to brush it away, but started when I realized it was in fact the Ikran's queue. With a shout, I took mine and merged our queues together, forming Tsahaylu. The Ikran beneath me shuddered in a most unnatural way and the bola snapped off its jaws. I thought it was done, but apparently the Ikran did not think so. It tumbled off the nearest cliff awkwardly. I had no experience with flying and I was completely horrified, holding onto its neck and I may or may not have been screaming. I honestly couldn't tell.

Just as tears were coming out of my eyes and I felt as if I were surely going to die and take this Ikran with me, I caught sight of A'mari'k. "Brother!" I shouted, "How do I control him?"

I got no discernable reply, and I knew I could not blame it on the wind for there was none at that instant. A'mari'k had chosen to remain silent.

I only had a moment to feel betrayed as a wood sprite flickered in and out of my vision. I'd never seen one before, but my surprise was swallowed by the sudden change in air pressure. I was falling again.

-x-

All the elders, all the Tsahiks before us had constantly reminded us that Eywa has no face or body.

They were all wrong.

The beautiful being in front of me could not be anyone but Eywa. Her skin was almost a pure, translucent white, but her hair was dark and eyes a fiery red. They said she had no hands, but in fact this woman had many hands. I could not count them all. Each hand held something. I could not recognize every object, but in one hand she held a skinning knife, another held a pot. I recognized some hunting knives and a bow, but the rest were alien to me.

I was standing on air, surrounded by dark. The only light came from Eywa herself. She had no face, but I could sense every change in her mood. I fell onto my knees, shuddering. Here I was, in front of Eywa. Eywa who'd dictated my entire life, who'd sent me into the throes of misery over and over again. Here was Eywa, our mother goddess and she was standing before me. Something truly magnificent must be going on, I realized, for no one ever saw Eywa. Not even the great Tsahiks were gifted by her presence. I was either very blessed or had already died.

Neytiri once told me Eywa could not speak. She told me that Eywa's will could be interpreted, but she was incapable of voice. Neytiri was wrong. Voice passed from Eywa all right, but it was of a different language. It was not Na'vi or English, but they were words nonetheless. I should not have understood it, but I did. In bits and pieces I put together phrases, and could hardly catch up to Eywa's speed as she spoke.

"My child," she was saying, "there will be three nights of importance in your life. None of them have passed so far, but you will now experience them in rapid succession. You are not to return to your clan until the first moon passes. This first moon will end your childhood and open your eyes. The second moon will strike those you love in the heart, and on the third moon you are to become Eywa."

"Become Eywa?" I repeated, stunned. "You mean I am to die?"

Eywa shook that long mane of hair. There were no beads in it; the hair was free flowing like water. It was mesmerizing to watch. "That is for you to decide, child. Remember my words and heed to them. Use the gift I am about to give you to fulfill your nights."

Then the space holding me up gave and I collapsed.

"Yishat, Yishat?" Someone was slapping my face. "Wake up!"

I opened my eyes to see A'mari'k leaning above me with concern in his features. I could make out only so much, but I saw the creases in his forehead. There was not one moment of blurriness, not one moment of lightheadedness. My Ikran was no where to be seen. "A'mari'k," I cried hoarsely, "I have just seen Eywa."

He did not seem surprised or even happy like I'd expected him to be. Instead he looked as if something very unfortunate had happened. "What must you do?"

"I can't go back to the tribe until… Until… I don't know, brother." My mind was in jumbles. What did Eywa mean by the nights? Am I supposed to take literally or was there a deeper meaning?

A'mari'k nodded, "Eywa warned me. I'm not sure how, but I knew something was going to happen. Well then, Yishat, you must do as Eywa wishes." He stood up and started to back away from me. Panic started to rise within me and I grabbed frantically at his ankle.

"Don't leave me out here, brother! I have nothing to protect myself with!" Pulling myself off the floor, I could see A'mari'k's face more clearly. He was clearly struggling to decide what to do, his facial expression contorting and relaxing.

He flicked my hands away and scolded, "Eywa does not want me here! Do you not feel the coldness that has settled over this place? I will give you what I can, but you are on your own. Eywa will provide for you; you must trust her."

A'mari'k set down a sharp edged hunting knife and some provisions in front of me. Dried fruits, some medicinal herbs and a few seeds were all he could spare. I started to tremble. I just wanted to go home, wanted to wear that necklace my mother had made me. I wanted to feel the warmth of the Hometree once more, but that was all gone now. I'd have to stay out here for as long as Eywa wished with no goal or explanation. But at least I would not die, I was sure.

"I will take my leave now," A'mari'k leaned down and kissed me lightly on the forehead. His lips were cold. "I will speak to the clan about what has happened; do not fear. You have tamed your Ikran and have succeeded, Yishat. You are now part of our clan and we await your return."

With that, A'mari'k nimbly pulled himself onto a tree and was soon out of my sight. He spared me no smiles to warm my memory and I was utterly alone.

-x-

Apparently I had dropped from the top of the Mountains into the forest below. I could not believe I was not only alive, but virtually unscathed. Night was falling, and I was alone in a forest without a bow. This was practically the worst case scenario for me; I had never been so deep in a forest before in my entire life!

Eywa's words echoed in my mind, tormenting me with every step I took. I was almost convinced that Eywa meant for me to take 'nights' literally. So my life was about to change drastically, and I would have to stay out here until the change occurred. The change should take place within a night. However, I was not sure how long I had to stay in the forest for until the change found me. At this point I was exhausted and ready to submit to Eywa's will. Eywa had long since made it clear to me that her will goes, no matter what.

This sounded a little strange to me and struck me as something I wouldn't normally do or think of. However, seeing that I couldn't even keep my eyes open at this point, I really didn't care. I was just too tired, and if Eywa wanted to play this game, so be it. If it changed my life, that is all the better.

As I wandered through the thick undergrowth, swatting away bugs whilst trying to make as little noise as I could, my mind began to clear. My situation, I realized, was absolutely ridiculous. I had no idea what I was supposed to accomplish, yet I am stuck here until I complete whatever task I was assigned. To make matters worse, Eywa was drinking up the light, taking away what little of it I could see. What was that about ending my childhood? I'd tamed my Ikran; what else was there to do?

Also, I had no idea how to find food here, for never have I hunted. I was aware I had an Ikran now, but I did not know how to call for it. The small hunting dagger A'mari'k gave me was sharper than the skinning knife but would not be able to bring down a beast. I needed a bow for that, and a bow was precisely what Eywa had chosen not to give me.

Yet had she not spoken of a gift? Was this a material gift or a spiritual one? Was my gift the Ikran himself? And how am I to call to him? Have I not already been gifted? Eywa has appeared to me! I saw her! I laughed despite myself, wondering what Neytiri would have to say about that. Then, my face fell. What would she say? A'mari'k assured me I had passed my tests, but now I was different. I'd seen Eywa and not even Tsahik could do that. What was I now? I could surely no longer be a home tender, but there was nothing else I could do. Eywa had once again put me in a difficult situation.

As the night pressed on a more urgent matter came into my mind. Beasts roamed in the night, and I would have to find myself a place to rest until morning or be eaten while I slept. The trees here were thin and would not support my weight if I decided to build a hammock. I knew how to construct a makeshift hammock, but the materials in the forest here were limited. I'd managed to tear a large, stretchy piece of skin from a mushroom nearby, but now I needed two tall trees. I had to be far above ground or else the beasts would find me.

Whilst the threat of the beasts was real, I promised myself I would not be afraid. Eywa would protect me, would she not? I was just strolling with the cloth like material, looking for the perfect spot when I heard the howl of a Nantang. They would start to hunt soon, and they were near. I was sure they smelled me. A cold sweat breaking out on my body, I quickened my pace. Now any tree would do! When it dawned on me that they were coming for me, that I had no time to set up a hammock, I dropped the material and ran.

I was by no means a fast runner, especially in such a rough terrain. I had no idea where to put my foot, if this plant was poisonous or if that root would hold my weight. Paiiyi would know such things; she loved to go deep into the forests to discover new plants. I cursed myself for not once going with her.

All of Eywa's creations are connected in an eternal bond that none could break. The Nantang and the Na'vi were essentially the same spirits taking on a different form, all children of Eywa. The Nantang held Eywa's spirit, and so did each plant, each flower, and each breath of air I took. Night had fallen, Eywa had finished drinking up what little light was left and was resting. Could she see me now? Where were her eyes? In the sky or in the ground?

They were not far now, I could hear their wheezing breath. Soon their breaths turned into excited yapping as they neared me, and I could hear the sounds of their claws scraping against the earth. Now I was frantic. I'd never seen a Nantang up close before and I did not wish for it to be the last thing I see. The entire forest smelled sickeningly sweet, and I could hardly see anything except what was immediately in front of me. Where was Eywa when I needed her so badly?

Then I saw it; Eywa's gift. Between two trees was a stretch of vines and sinew that seemed much like a hammock in shape. What a coincidence that the vines and sinews would form in this way on their own! I was also certain it was strong enough to hold my weight. Climbing up the tree as fast as I could, I darted into the hammock, making it swing wildly.

To my surprise, the Nantang did not follow me here. I saw a glimpse of them as they neared the proximity of the tree but they turned and raced away with their tail between their legs. Eywa had protected me after all.

I breathed a profound sigh of relief, my heartbeat racing in my chest. I'd cut my feet on the rough bark of the tree, but I was safe here in Eywa's cradle. I could stay here for the rest of the night. Just as I was settling down into the hammock, the entire thing flipped over and I fell face first onto the ground below. Pain shot through my skull and immediately I tasted blood. I propped myself up in alarm, spitting out dirt as I did. What in the world?

I looked up at the hammock I had just been in and noted that another Na'vi had occupied it. It was dark but I could still make out his form.

"A'mari'k?" I frowned, realization dawning on me, "what are you doing here?"

The voice that answered me seemed generally surprised, "What are you doing here, Yishat? This is no place for a home tender."

…Oh dear.

MUHAHAHA...

-Ahem-

It has come to my attention that I get extremely insecure about my writing right at the midpoint of a story. This pisses me off D:. I think I'm good at building suspense but bad at actually writing the climaxes? Hm, either way I'm looking for some criticism on this chapter. A'mari'k's character will be explained later, if that comes across as an Out of Character-ness moment for you guys. -Ahem-.

Also, I made the mistake of buying the Sims 2 Seasons, and have fallen utterly in love with it. ): My updates will lag a little; please excuse me!

Please give me your thoughts. Thanks in advance!