AN: Ok, first of all, this chapter sucks. Seriously, I hate it. But it was necessary, I wanted some sort of tension between our two favorite girls. But it still sucks. I don't even know why I'm uploading it. In my defense, I'm already writing the next one, that I hope it's gonna be better.
So please, don't hate me, please, if you don't like it (and you won't like it), just stick around until the next one.
And review, even if it's just for saying "hey, this chapter sucks!".
DISCLAIMER: Do I really need to write it again?
CHAPTER 8 – You keep me hangin' on
Meredith and Addison were lying in Meredith's bed that morning, both reading the newspaper, taking a few moments for themselves before starting their day.
"You know" said Addison suddenly, "Karev surprised me yesterday."
"Alex?" asked Meredith, who didn't understand why her friend was talking about Alex. "What?"
"You know, yesterday's case...pregnant girl, shard of glass in her heart..." explained the attending. "She didn't tell the father of the baby she is pregnant...and Karev tried to convince her to do it...he talked to her, he was really...sensitive...caring...he's a decent guy, I don't understand why he keeps hiding this side of him behind that Manwhore 2.0 mask."
"Why this sudden interest for Alex?"
"We worked together for a while...and he was always so...annoying...and then he kept asking to go into plastic...I never imagined he could be like this, you know...it was surprising."
"Addison, do you like Alex?" asked Meredith, instantly feeling a sharp pain into her chest.
Addison widened her eyes. "What? No! I was just saying...come on, Meredith, he's like 12 years old!"
"Hey!" complained Meredith. "Don't go there, I'm twelve too from your point of view, so why are you my friend?"
"Cause girls are more mature than guys!" joked Addison.
"Shut up!" laughed Meredith, slapping Addison's arm softly. "Now get your ass out of this bed and into the shower or we're gonna be late, I also have to stop by to my mother and I don't want Bailey to yell on me cause you have the hots for Alex!"
"I don't have the hots for Karev!" protested Addison. "Drop it or I swear I'm gonna ask Bailey to make you do rectal exams all day!"
The two women laughed and Addison disappeared in the bathroom.
Downstairs, Izzie and George were listening to their friend's and her new friend's giggling.
"This is so weird." said George.
"They're acting either like a couple or like teenagers having sleepovers every night." Izzie shook her head annoyed. "First there was Christina, now Dr Montgomery...nice to be part of the club!" she added sarcastically.
George looked at her.
"Sorry, I'm cranky."
-o-
The five interns were following Dr Bailey for rounds, when Addison walked over.
"Dr Bailey, can I have Grey?" asked.
"You can have them all." replied harshly the resident, obviously angry about the whole Christina and Burke thing.
Meredith left the group and joined Addison.
"Hey, what's up?"
"I thought you might want to be warned, your sister Molly has just been admitted for an emergency c-section." said Addison.
"Molly's not my sister." Meredith corrected her. Damn, she didn't need this, not today, not after her mom told her she should never have had kids. She knew her mother wasn't lucid, but she couldn't help to feel hurt. Cause her mom's mind was back in years and that was something she thought years ago, when Meredith was just a kid. Her mom didn't want her.
Addison voice took her back to reality. "Well, Meredith, technically she is. You have the same father. And Susan..."
"Susan Grey is definitely not my mother." Meredith interrupted her. "Look, Addison, I know you're just being nice to me, but I really don't even need to know this."
"Actually, you do." said Addison looking behind Meredith's back, where Susan was approaching.
"Hello, Meredith." the woman greeted her. "Your father's not here. Thatcher's at Harvard Med visiting Lexie. We thought we had a lot of time I mean, Molly's only 36 weeks, and Dr. Montgomery has been trying to stop the contractions but I guess the baby's ready to come."
Meredith tried to ignore her. "Well, do you need anything else, or..." said to Addison.
"Actually I could use an intern for this case. Can you ask Dr. Bailey for someone?"
"I'll do it!" responded Meredith, immediately regretting it. Why would she want to be on her sister, half sister or whatever she was, case?
Addison looked at her. It wasn't the answer she was expecting. "Are you sure?"
Meredith nodded. She wanted to be there. In the OR with Addison and, even if she would never admit it out loud, with Molly.
Addison wasn't sure it was ok to let Meredith scrub in on that surgery. There was a severe family policy in the hospital. But Meredith insisted that Molly wasn't her sister, so maybe everything would turn out fine. Or at least, she hoped.
-o-
Addison was scrubbing out the surgery and getting ready for the next one. She knew it would have happened! She knew it. She had been so stupid to allow Meredith to scrub in with her. She had let her feelings for the intern get in the way of her job and Addison Forbes Montgomery never lets her feelings prevail when she was at the hospital. She had allowed Meredith to scrub in even if she knew she was emotionally involved just because she was her friend. It has been a terrible mistake. Not that anything happened, but still...it wasn't something Addison would have normally done.
It has been a while since she first started wondering about what she was feeling for the intern. She was her friend, sure...but it was something more. All those nights spent together, the bathtub, the jokes, sometimes even the flirting. That night that Meredith told her she was the one she wanted to talk to at the end of the day...that wasn't just friendship. Callie had become a great friend too, but Addison didn't behave with the dark haired resident like she behaved with Meredith. And surely she didn't feel the same way when she was around Callie.
Like she was evoked from these thoughts, Meredith entered the scrub room.
"You left me hanging in there, Meredith." said Addison, not even looking at her.
"I'm sorry...I'm just...sorry. Do you need me to scrub in on the baby?" asked Meredith.
"No I need you to keep Molly and her mother apprised of the baby's condition while I operate." replied Addison, finally looking at the intern.
"I'm sure they'd rather talk to you."
"The baby's got Juvenile Artesia. She may die. I got consent but I don't have time for updates." Addison's words were hard.
Meredith could feel there was something wrong, but she insisted. "I think I would really learn a lot from observing this."
"It was a mistake to let you in the OR with your family in the first place. It's not going to happen again. Check in with me every hour." said Addison, leaving the room.
"Addison, wait!" Meredith tried to call her back.
Addison stopped and looked at Meredith. In that moment there was no friendship in her eyes, no feelings. Addison was cold as ice. "No, Meredith. Do as I told you. In this moment, I'm not your friend. I'm your boss, your teacher, so let me do my job and check in with me every hour!"
Meredith watched Addison leaving and turned around to go to talk to Molly and Susan. Meanwhile she replayed in her head the conversation she just had with Addison. She didn't understand why Addison had been so harsh with her. That wasn't what she needed today. She needed her friend.
The things got worse when she went in the OR to get the updates from Addison.
"I'm having trouble with the anastomosis and I still have to take a look at the distal bowel." said the red head, focused on the little body on her table.
"What should I tell Molly?" asked the intern.
"I don't know!" Addison looked Meredith in the eyes. Her tone was...annoyed, cold, pissed...not friendly...not Addison. Not Addison with Meredith anyway. "Tell her I'm doing the best I can. I don't know."
Meredith nodded and left the OR, feeling Addison's gaze in her. She was hurt, but she realized that Addison was just worried, and she wanted to do her best cause, like it or not, that baby was related to Meredith. And, Meredith knew Addison cared about her, a lot.
-o-
Thank God the surgery went well. Sure, Laura, that's how Molly named her, needed some recovery time, but everything went well.
Meredith was in the intern's lock room, she had snapped to her friends for their behavior toward Christina and managed to make Christina understand that she was there for her. It was a rough time for her best friend and she wanted to be there for her, cause Christina was like her sister. She didn't need Molly cause she already had a sister. But she was tired. Her mom made her tired, the tension between her friends for George father's situation and what Christina did made her tired, her feelings for Addison made her tired...and Addison's behavior that day didn't help her to feel better. She had to talk to the red head and understand what was going on with her.
She found her in the lobby, heading to the hotel.
"Why?" she asked loudly, making Addison turn around. "Why were you so cold today, so harsh?"
Addison rolled her eyes. She didn't want to go there, not now, she just wanted to go to her room, lie down and sleep. "Meredith, not now, please."
"No, Addison, now. What did I do to make you behave like this?"
"You did nothing, Meredith. Just...let me go, please."
"Then why are you so angry with me?" asked Meredith, raising her voice.
"I'm not angry with myself, Meredith!" Addison almost shouted. "God, don't you see it? It was my fault today, not yours. I'm pissed at myself, cause I should have known better, I should have never let you in that OR. But I let you because of my feelings for you, and that's not what a good teacher does! That's why I'm so mad. I let my feelings get in the way."
"Your feelings?" stuttered Meredith confused. "Your feelings for me?"
Addison cursed herself for what she had just said. Dammit, what was about Meredith Grey that made her lose any kind of control she had on herself?
"I..." she tried to explain."I mean, we're friends, right? I care about you, that's why I let you scrub in...but I was wrong. And I was so worried about Laura, cause she's your niece and I didn't want her to die."
"She's not my niece." Meredith corrected her.
"Whatever, Meredith. I'm going home now."
"Can I come with you?" asked Meredith, her voice full of hope.
"I don't know, I think it's better if you go back to your place tonight." replied Addison, turning around and getting ready to leave.
"Addison, please!" Meredith begged her. She didn't even realize she was starting to cry. "I need you tonight. Please."
When Addison saw the intern's tears, she rushed at her side. "Hey, it's ok, it's ok, you can come with me. What's wrong?"
"My mom..." sobbed the younger woman. "My mom basically told me I was a mistake. And then Susan and Molly...and Christina and my friends, and George's dad...and you...god Addison, why did you treat me like that?"
"I'm so sorry, Meredith! I'm sorry!" said the attending, hugging her friend tightly. "Come on, let's go."
Meredith nodded and the two of them walked out of the hospital together; Addison's arm around Meredith's shoulders, Meredith still crying.
"Addison?" said Meredith while they were walking to the car. "Don't ever treat me like that again. Please..."
Addison nodded. "Never again. I promise."