How to Kill Ilia in 50 ways

by RyuuRanger

This fic is inspired by reading MCS's "100 ways to kill Ilia". I thought I should try my hand in this. The story's finally done. And it has a surprise ending!

33. Death By Goblins

I do not own Final Fantasy and Zelda. Square-Enix and Nintendo own them.

Link, a Fighter, was walking towards Corneila along with Zelda, a White Mage, Midna, a Black Mage, and Ilia, a Red Mage.

"Linky, I'm borrrred!" Ilia whined. "I wanna go back to Hyrule!"

Zelda and Midna rolled their eyes. Why did they even take Ilia along with them in the first place?

"We're almost there," Link reminded her.

Suddenly, a group of goblins appeared from out of nowhere. "Oh, shit!" Midna swore.

"RUN!" Link shouted. Zelda and Midna had managed to escape from the goblins, but Ilia didn't.

"HEY, YOU UGLY LITTLE BASTARDS!" Ilia thwacked one of them with a stick, angering it. "YOU LEAVE MY LINKY ALONE!"

The other three dog-plied her and beat her to death as the trio entered the town.

Ilia's body was carried away by the goblins to be eaten at their feast tonight.