HOLA, EVERYBODY! AS YOU CAN SEE, THIS IS CHAPTER 5 (HOLY CRAP!) AND I STILL HAVE TO MAKE NUMBER 6!
BUT THAT'S OKAY I'M ALMOST DONE (NOT) AND SHOULD BE DONE IN AN HOUR (S) SO... YEAH! HOPE YOU LIKE IT!
MORE ANGST AND STUFF IN THIS ONE. NEXT CHAPTER IS AWESOMER (IS THAT EVEN A WORD?) THAN THE OTHER ONES CUZ... WELL, YOU'LL SEE!
ANYWAY, HERE IS CHAPTER 5!:
Chapter 5- Thoughts
I don't know how long I laid there. All I was thinking of was Jacob.
What he looked like; his soft gleaming black hair, the way his eyebrows pinched when he grinned wide and his mesmerizing eyes that seemed to look into your very soul.
That's what I have always loved about his appearance. His eyes. Gleaming with laughter, glistening with unshed tears when we had that fight. Wow, that was a cry-fest!
How I made him feel; happy, heartfelt and affectionate.
Yes, affectionate. He has always been so tender with me. Occasionally smoothing my hair behind my ear when it gets in my face. listening to my issues.
He's so wonderful.
How he made me feel; happiness and...I don't know. Could it be a spark? A little thing that could grow to something bigger?
I have no idea.
I lay on my bed like that for hours, just thinking and not thinking about life. My life.
I heard a noise and sat up. Someone had slowly opened my door to look at me. Alice walked in and sat on the edge of my bed.
I scooched over to her and tried to fake a smile and failed. She smiled at my grimace and put her arms around me in an embrace.
She silently stroked my hair when I put my head on her shoulder. I looked up at her with pleading eyes, wanting her to tell me that this was just a dream.
But I knew that it wasn't.
"Ness, you know the future would've changed if we had told you before," Alice spoke, "You would've forced yourself to love him and wouldn't grow to him eventually. This wouldn't make you or Jacob happy."
I wanted to protest but no one could do that with Alice. And it was so... me. I would do that. I'm just that kind of person. Stupid personality!
"Why does this have to happen to me?" I wailed, "My life's complicated enough! I'm ½ vampire, for god's sake!"
Alice looked at me sadly for a moment, then gave me a hug.
"You've grown so much. I love you, Renesmee!"
She squeezed me again and ran out the door and towards the Cullen house. Probably to Jasper. Lucky her.
I smiled faintly at her back and collapsed once again to the haven I tend to call my bed.
I would wake sometimes to hear my parents worried voices floating up the stairs and through the door.
"Should we tell Jacob?" My dad would say over and over again. He didn't seem to understand that that would be the worst thing to do.
"No, Edward," Mom replied, "Renesmee would not like that. They would both be embarrassed."
Thank god. At least she understands me. But its OK. Dad's just worried.
I could hardly process the words. They seemed to go in one ear and out the other. My brain barely seemed to connect them as words.
I fell asleep again. -OKAY, SORRY, ITS ME. I JUST WANTED TO SAY THAT RENESMEE NEEDS TO SLEEP A LOT SINCE SHE GROWS SO FAST, SO YEAH-
I woke again as Mom stuck her head through the door. Her beautiful black her flowed down to her waist and seemed to engulf her.
I loved her hair. i used to brush it for hours when I was little. I loved being able stroke my fingers through the soft strands.
Anyway, she was looking at me through my door.
"Ness, your dad and I are going hunting, okay? We'll back in 5 hours or so. You'll be alright till then, right?"
I nodded my head. As she closed the door, I saw the love and pity in her black eyes.
I sighed and tried to go back to sleep, but realized that I was not tired any more. First time in awhile.
So, I decided to take a walk in the woods. Once I got outside, I started running. I mean, really running. Sprinting as fast as I could.
I tried to go some random direction, but after an hour, I realized where I was going. I smiled bitterly and picked up speed.
Of course, this was where my subconscious would take me. Oh well, I love this place anyway.
After a couple hours, I stopped behind a clump of bushes. I could smell their scent. I smiled and breathed in and out.
I could finally tell someone absolutely everything. Yes!
I made an opening in the leaves and stepped onto the front porch of the Denali Clan's house.
*.*.*.*.*
EEEEEPPPPPP! LONGER CHAPTER THIS TIME! YAYAYAYAYAYAYA! HOPED YOU LIKE IT!
6TH ONE SHOULD BE COMING UP SOON! HOPEFULLY! GOTTA GO, MY MOTHER'S YELLING AT ME TO GET EXERCISE.
MOVING MY HANDS ON THE KEY BOARD IS EXERCISE, RIGHT? OH, SCREW YOU GUYS! I'M GOING OUTSIDE!
HERE'S A QUOTE FOR YOUR ENTERTAINMENT:
A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice.
~Bill Cosby
P.S. IF YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS OR CORRECTIONS, PLEASE TELL ME AND I'LL TRY TO WRITE BACK!
THANK YOU!