AN: Oops…I posted this and saw that I uploaded the wrong version…sorry all! This is the correct version…hopefully you didn't already start reading.
I'm sorry I didn't get a chance to reply to all your wonderful reviews this time around, just please know that they were all read and greatly appreciated! I'm a bit nervous about this chapter for some reason, so, let me know what you think.
Also, I wasn't planning on posting again until tomorrow at the earliest, but I loved King of All Loser's review so much that I decided to post earlier. So, KoaL, this is for you. Hope it doesn't disappoint!
Chapter Three
July 30th
Draco and Pansy were strolling slowly down the street, hand in hand, both of them immensely enjoying the summer weather.
The petit blonde woman occasionally squeezed her friend's hand and gave him pitying looks out of the corner of her eye. "Why do you let this one get to you so much?"
Draco stared at the ground as he shuffled his feet. He managed a one shoulder shrug and a heavy sigh.
Pansy let go of his hand and slipped her arm through his, holding it tightly. "Perhaps you should give Theo a call. I'm sure he would be happy to help you get your mind off Harry."
Draco made a face of disgust. "I'm not that desperate, Pans."
She laughed and smacked his arm. "He isn't that bad."
"Believe me, if you had ever been slobbered on by that boy, you would never think to push him on anyone." He shuddered overdramatically.
Pansy laughed again and tugged his arm to pull him in another direction. "I want ice cream."
Draco rolled his eyes, but followed her lead to the ice cream parlor across the street. "I'm not eating that. It's bad for you."
"They have frozen yogurt, too." She continued dragging him into the small shop.
They ordered their desserts – a sundae for Pansy and a small cup of strawberry yogurt for Draco – and sat down outside on the patio.
Pansy watched her moody friend as he picked at his yogurt. "Theo would marry you if you asked."
Draco sighed softly and looked up at her with a sad smile. "I don't love him. I never have and I highly doubt I ever will. That would be a bit unfair, yeah?"
She nodded. "But at least I wouldn't worry about you all the time."
He laughed softly. "There's nothing to worry about." He squeezed her hand and smiled at her. "I'm only twenty four, Pans…it's not time to worry yet."
"But Harry-"
"Don't," he interrupted. "Harry isn't…he doesn't…he has nothing to do with my mood."
She gave him a disbelieving look.
"It's true!" he insisted, somewhat offended that his best friend didn't believe him. She would probably be more apt to believe you if you could spit out a sentence without stuttering all over yourself like a love sick fool. He sighed heavily. "Alright, fine…he's the one that got the ball rolling on the whole 'I don't want to be alone forever' thing, but that's all. If anything, I should thank him for putting a stop to all the one night stands."
Pansy laughed softly and sat back in her chair to finish her sundae. "You enjoyed the one night stands."
He shrugged. "Maybe."
"Pansy! Draco!"
The two blonds turned to see Hermione Granger and Ron Weasley walking across the street. Hermione was waving at them and dragging Ron by the hand behind her.
"He's like twice as tall as she is and he can still hardly keep up," Draco laughed as he waved at Harry's friends. "I can't imagine being surrounded by that…pep everyday."
Pansy smacked his arm. "I think she's fantastic." She turned and flashed a brilliant smile at the energetic girl hurrying their way. "Hello, darling! How wonderful to see you again." She stood and pulled Hermione into a quick hug.
"You too." Hermione smiled at her.
"Hello, Pansy," Ron said as he set Hermione's bags down.
She smiled at him. "Hello, Ron."
Draco stood and extended a hand to the redhead. "Ron," he said with a nod and a smile.
Ron shook his hand and returned the greeting.
Hermione slid around Ron and gave Draco a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek. "He's here…with Oliver," she whispered before pulling away from him.
Draco froze for a split second before casually glancing around and taking his seat again. No one, except Hermione, even noticed his unease.
"So, what did you buy?" Pansy asked as she eyed the brown bag Ron had set on the table.
Hermione and Pansy started an in depth discussion on the books Hermione had purchased, leaving the men to talk amongst themselves.
Ron leaned back in his seat, balancing it on two legs, as he looked Draco over from head to toe.
Draco glanced around again, but his eyes narrowed when they fell on Ron. He raised an eyebrow at the redhead. "Yes?"
"I can see why he likes you," Ron said with a slight nod.
Draco shifted nervously in his seat. "Stop looking at me."
Ron continued as if Draco hadn't spoken. "You're not his usual type…which is good. You're charming enough, I suppose and you've got style, money and a sense of humor. Oh, and you've got a nice head of hair."
Draco gave him a look. "Are you sure you aren't trying to get in my pants, Weasley?"
Ron blushed and looked to make sure the girls were still occupied. He leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees and lowered his voice. "I want him away from Oliver."
Draco sighed softly and mirrored Ron's position. "Don't know that I can be much help there, mate. Besides…he's a grown man. He'll make his own decisions."
"Yeah…bad decisions," Ron mumbled as he rested his head in his hands.
Draco laughed softly and patted Ron's shoulder.
"What's going on here?"
Ron looked up over Draco's shoulder and forced a smile.
Draco could feel Harry's presence behind him, but he didn't turn to face him. "Hello, Potter," he said, no emotion in his voice.
Harry was silent for a moment, but Draco could feel those brilliant emerald eyes burning into the back of his head. "Malfoy," he finally said, though he sounded incredibly nervous.
Draco took the dark sunglasses from his head, where they had been perched in order to keep his hair out of his face, and put them on as he stood. He smoothed down his dark blue polo shirt and checked for his wallet and keys. He knew Harry was watching his every move, but he was determined not to look at him. "Pansy love…are you ready to go?"
Pansy looked up at him with a pout. "But I'm talking to Hermione," she complained.
Draco glared at her, which of course she couldn't see due to his dark glasses.
"Why are you hanging out with my friends, Malfoy?" Harry said, his voice a bit sharp.
Draco cocked an eyebrow and turned to face the smaller man. "Excuse me?" he said, his jaw clenched tightly. I'll be damned if this little shit will tell me who I can be friends with.
"Harry, you're being rude," Hermione said softly.
Draco delighted in the fact that he could see the many emotions running through Harry's eyes, but that Harry couldn't see the anger and hurt in his own.
"You're only doing this because I don't want to date you." Harry folded his arms over his chest and glared at Draco.
Draco let out a mirthless laugh and ignored the sharp pain in his chest at Harry's statement. He forced a smirk onto his face. "What are you, five?"
"Why else would you be here?"
"Give your friends some credit, Potter. Is it so very hard to believe that I enjoy their company?"
Harry flushed and shifted nervously. "I know you're doing this because of me." He sounded less sure of his convictions.
"Oh, get over yourself, Potter," Draco growled out, his anger finally overwhelming him. "It isn't like this city is in short supply of men like you. You don't have an original bone in your scrawny body and I already know that I can do better than you and have done better dozens, if not hundreds, of times. So why don't you get off that bloody pedestal you've put yourself on and quit imagining that people feel more for you than they do? After all, sometimes a fuck is just a fuck." Ouch…a tad bitter are we?
Harry flushed bright red and couldn't keep the look of hurt from his face.
"Draco," Pansy said, her voice heavy with shock and disappointment.
But he was on a roll. "Don't 'Draco' me, Pans," he snapped, never taking his eyes from Harry's face. "He thinks he can do whatever the fuck he wants without giving a damn how it affects other people. Well, I think it's time everyone stop coddling little Harry and start expecting him to act like a fucking adult!"
Ron, Hermione and Pansy were silent as they looked back and forth at the two angry men.
"Stay away from my friends," Harry said, his voice low and rough.
Draco laughed softly. "They came over here, Potter. Maybe you should tell them to stay away from me. Then maybe I'll get my wish of never having to see your face again." Yep…that was mature. He pushed in his chair hard, slamming it into the table. "Hermione." He nodded at her and turned to Pansy. "I'm going home. Phone me later." He kissed the top of her head.
"Draco, don't go," Pansy said as she reached for his hand.
He squeezed her hand and let go, ignoring her pleas. He turned and nodded at Ron. "Later, Weasley." He extended his hand, which Ron took.
"Harry, stop this," Hermione said as she stood. "You're being a jerk."
Harry snorted. "Don't defend the enemy, 'Mione."
"How did he become the enemy?" Ron asked.
Draco spun around to face Harry. "Yes, Potter, how exactly did I become so vile in your eyes?" He folded his arms over his chest and waited to hear why Harry suddenly hated him with such passion. He couldn't believe how badly it hurt.
Harry's eyes were glued to Draco's face. "Take those stupid glasses off."
Draco hesitated and tried to push away the pain and anger that he knew were written all over his face. He took the glasses and pushed them up onto his head. He swallowed heavily as his grey eyes met green and a jolt of electricity shot up his spine. "Better?"
Harry breathed deeply and gave a jerky nod.
"So are you going to tell me why you hate me so much or am I going to have to guess?"
"He probably hates you because you're a spoiled rotten little git who thinks he's better than everyone else because his daddy has money."
Draco was paralyzed with anger. No one talks about my family! He spun around to face the unfamiliar voice behind him.
He found himself face to face with a rather attractive man that he instantly knew to be Oliver. They were the same height and build, but this boy had light brown hair and dark brown eyes. His lip was curled in disgust as he looked at Draco.
Draco's blood was pounding in his ears as he stepped closer to this man that he hated more than was probably healthy. "You don't know anything about my family," he said between clenched teeth.
Pansy was now standing right behind Draco and she tried to take his arm.
Draco pulled away. "Pansy," he warned.
She stepped back.
Harry went to Oliver's side and slid his hand into his. "Come on, baby. Let's go home."
"Harry, don't." Oliver pulled away from the smaller man, but didn't take his eyes from Draco's. "I don't like how he was talking to you."
Draco rolled his eyes and laughed.
"He isn't worth your time or mine," Harry said as he took Oliver's wrist in his hand.
Draco glared at Harry, hoping the anger would push away the dropping feeling in his stomach. Though he highly suspected that the hurt he felt was too deep to cover.
Harry glanced at him, but looked away immediately.
Hermione stepped up to the two men and cleared her throat. "Boys, I don't think-"
"Shut the hell up, Granger," Oliver snapped. "This is between me and him. So, for once why don't you mind your own fucking business?"
"Watch it, Wood," Ron growled as he put an arm around his fiancé.
Draco took a step closer to Harry's boyfriend. "Do not talk to her that way."
Oliver gave him an evil smile as he stepped so close, they were almost touching. "I'll talk to her however the fuck I want. You should stop sticking that pointy nose of yours in places it doesn't belong."
Draco's fist was clenched and it took all his will power not to swing.
"Draco…let's go home please," Pansy begged him from where she stood aside with Ron and Hermione.
Draco glanced over at Harry and saw the embarrassment that was overwhelming him, making him appear smaller than he already was. God damn you, Harry Potter. He sighed and took a step back from Oliver. "Come on, Pans." He held his hand out to her.
She grabbed his hand in both of hers and let him lead her away.
"You fucking wanker! Don't you walk away from me!" Oliver yelled after him.
Pansy felt Draco tense and she held tighter. "Ignore him."
Draco's face was burning in anger…and not just at Oliver. I'm not worth his time? Well fuck him then!
Oliver was following closely behind them, his steps hurried to keep up. "Yeah, go run to your prick of a father and your whore of a mother, you bloody useless piece of garbage."
Draco spun around so fast that he almost knocked Pansy to the ground.
"No, don't," she begged.
Draco pulled from her grip and rushed at Oliver. "Don't you ever talk about my mother!" he spit out
as he pulled his arm back to hit the smug brunette.
Oliver laughed and easily blocked Draco's attempt at a punch. He elbowed the blond in the face, then grabbed him by the neck and shoved him hard against the wall.
Draco groaned when his head hit the brick wall. His vision went a bit fuzzy and he had to hold back the urge to be sick. After a moment his head cleared, but he began to panic when he realized that he couldn't take a breath.
"Oliver, stop!" Harry yelled as he hurried to them and grabbed his boyfriend's arm.
Oliver roughly pushed Harry away and tightened his grip on Draco's neck.
"Stop!" Pansy yelled as she tried to pull away from Hermione who was holding her back. "He can't breathe! Stop it!"
Draco struggled for breath and clawed at the calloused hand that was crushing his windpipe. His eyes darted around frantically and eventually rested on Harry, silently pleading with him to do something.
Harry's face was pale white with terror as he stared at his boyfriend and his (sometimes) lover.
"Damn it, Harry!" Pansy yelled between sobs. "Do something!"
Ron pushed Harry aside and made his way over to Draco and Oliver. He grabbed Oliver's arm and tried to pull it back. "Let him go," he said, his voice angry and cold. "Now!"
Oliver kicked back, hitting Ron in the shin and causing him to stumble. "Not your fight, Weasley, so get the fuck away!"
"Oliver," Ron warned once he regained his balance.
Oliver glared at Ron, but suddenly howled in pain and dropped Draco to the ground. He looked down at the bleeding gashes that ran down his forearm, courtesy of Pansy's fingernails.
Pansy roughly pushed him away and stood between her friend and his attacker, almost daring him to hit her.
Draco slumped against the wall, coughing and gasping for breath.
"Get out of here before I call the police!" Pansy screamed as she crouched beside her friend and pulled him into her arms.
Hermione was standing to the side with her hands over her mouth, staring at the two blond's on the ground.
"I will kill you, you bitch!" Oliver yelled, still clutching at his bleeding arm.
"Come on," Harry said as he led his furious boyfriend away.
"Oh my God." Hermione crouched in front of Draco and Pansy. "Are you alright?" She dug through her bag until she found a few clean tissues which she handed to him.
Draco pressed them to his bleeding lower lip and winced. "I've never been hit in the face before."
Pansy was holding his hand so tightly that he was starting to lose feeling, but he didn't complain.
"I'm so sorry, mate. I should've done something as soon as I realized how angry he was," Ron said as he crouched next to his fiancé. "He's never been easy to calm down."
Draco gave him a shrug. "Not your fault that Harry is dating a psychopath."
Pansy buried her face in his shoulder as she clung to him. "How's your head?"
"I'm okay, love," he insisted. He turned and kissed her temple as he raised a hand to check the bump on the back of his head. Luckily it didn't appear to be bleeding and as far as he could tell, he wasn't showing any signs of concussion.
Pansy held tighter. "I wish Blaise had been here."
Draco gently pulled away and climbed to his feet with Ron's help. "It's a good thing he's not or Oliver would have been a dead man and you'd be planning weekend visits to the local prison." He put his arm around his trembling friend and led her back to the table.
"I hate that fucker," Ron said softly as he and Hermione followed them.
The four of them sat in silence for a few minutes, no one really sure what to say and all of them a bit shocked that what had just happened had happened.
"He won't let us throw a party for Harry's birthday," Hermione finally said as she watched Draco dab at his lip with a tissue. "He's so controlling and…and…"
"Mean," Ron said.
She nodded.
"When's his birthday?" Draco asked.
"Tomorrow." Ron sighed heavily and sat back in his chair, putting his arm around Hermione's shoulder. "But they've been together for two months now. Since the day after your birthday, Draco. They're due for a breakup soon."
"Well, I'm sorry to say that Harry is an idiot for going back to him again and again." Draco's lip had finally stopped bleeding so he crumpled up the used tissues. "It's hard to feel bad for someone who continues to put himself in the same situation over and over again."
"He doesn't know any better," Hermione said in defense of her friend. "Oliver was the first guy he was ever with and, well…there's only ever been him." She blushed as she looked at Draco. "Well… him and…"
"Me," Draco said softly. Huh…I never would have guessed that.
She nodded.
"We were shocked when he told us about you," Ron said. "And he didn't even admit to it until a month after it happened. We got drunk one night and it all came pouring out. And once he started talking, he couldn't stop himself."
Hermione smiled sadly. "I had never seen him as happy as he was when he talked about that night."
"Then why does he go back to him every time? I've tried to offer him more. I've tried to get him to stay with me." Draco stared down at his hands.
"I think he punishes himself by going back," Hermione said. "Like he doesn't think he should be happy. He gets a small taste of it whenever he's with you and he immediately runs back to Oliver to remind himself that he has no right to be happy."
"That's ridiculous," Draco said, eyes wide with disbelief. Does make a weird sort of sense, though.
Hermione shrugged. "He hasn't had an easy life."
They fell into an awkward silence before Pansy composed herself and sat up straight. "Enough of this Harry Potter pity party," she said with a smile. She nudged Draco. "We've made two new friends from the whole mess and I say we take advantage of it."
Draco raised an eyebrow at her. "What are you on about?"
"I want to shop."
"Oh, me too!" Hermione perked up.
Ron rolled his eyes and looked at Draco. "I'm up for it if you are."
Draco laughed and shrugged. "Lets go then." He stood and he and Ron followed the girls around for the rest of the afternoon.
*.*.*.*
- July 31st -
"You pull it off well," Blaise said with a smirk.
Draco glared at him and touched his tender and swollen lip. "I don't look like some common thug?"
Blaise laughed and pulled himself up onto the edge of the desk. "You're wearing Armani. You couldn't possibly be a thug. And you know there's nothing 'common' about you."
Draco leaned closer to the mirror. He had a bit of bruising developing below the nasty gash on his split lower lip. His entire lip was puffy and red.
"Looks kind of sexy," Blaise finally said.
Draco laughed and turned to face his best friend. "Thought we got rid of those tendencies so you could marry Pansy."
Blaise blushed and looked down at his hands. "I love her with everything that I am," he said softly. "But there will never be a day that I don't look at you and realize how beautiful you are."
Draco looked at his friend with a soft smile. He went over to him and took his face in both of his hands. "I love you, you know that?"
Blaise smiled a bit and nodded.
"Good." Draco pressed a soft kiss to his best friend's lips. "Now, let's get out of here."
The two friends shut off the light and locked up the empty club.
"What time is it?" Draco asked as they headed towards their cars.
"Almost four," Blaise said. "Pansy's going to kill me. I told her I'd try to be home by two."
"She knows how it goes. She'll just…" Draco slowed until he was standing still, staring at his car.
"Dray?" Blaise turned back to his friend, then followed his stare to the blond's car.
Harry was sitting on the hood with his elbows on his knees, smoking a cigarette and staring at the ground.
Draco schooled his features and adjusted his shirt as he continued walking Blaise to his car.
"Dray?"
"Go," Draco said softly. "I'll be fine."
Blaise gave him a look, but finally agreed and got into his car.
Draco stood motionless next to Blaise's car and watched Harry carefully. The smaller man appeared to be completely lost in thought. His cigarette had burned halfway down and it didn't look like he had taken a single hit.
Blaise started his car and turned on his headlights, flooding Harry in light.
Harry looked up and shielded his face from the light, his eyes falling on Draco as the blond made his way towards him. Harry slid off the car and tossed his cigarette away. "Draco," he said softly.
Draco ignored him and went around to the driver's side to open the door.
Harry hurried over to him and pushed the door closed. He pressed his back to it so Draco couldn't open it. "Draco…please…"
"Move, Potter."
"No."
Draco glared at him.
"I'm not leaving until you talk to me." Harry tried to make eye contact but Draco refused.
"I distinctly recall telling you that you were no longer welcome here."
Harry shrugged. "You said nothing of the parking lot."
Draco laughed a bitter laugh. "Get it through your thick head, Potter. I don't want to see you." He turned to go back to the building and when he did, the light from the street lamp hit his skin, showing off the bruises on his pale neck.
"Jesus," Harry whispered as he grabbed the blond's arm. He reached out and gently touched the black and purple marks.
Draco growled softly as he pushed Harry's hand away. "Don't touch me."
Harry swallowed hard and nodded. "I'm sorry," he mumbled.
Draco snorted softly. "Sorry? You're fucking sorry? About what exactly? That you let your abusive fuck of a boyfriend talk to your friends like they're below him? Or are you sorry that you let him talk shit about my family? Or that you told him that I wasn't worth your time? Or that you just stood there while he tried to choke me to death in front of my best friend and yours? What exactly are you sorry about, Potter? Which fucking part?" He had tried to keep calm, but was almost embarrassed to find that he was shouting at the end.
Harry, who had backed away during Draco's rant, took a step forward. "All of it," he said in a small voice. He looked at Draco's split lip and he frowned and lowered his eyes, only to have them settle again on the faint bruises that covered the blond's neck. Harry's eyes filled with tears. "I didn't know he would do that."
"You didn't know?" Draco yelled.
Harry flinched and looked away.
"Get out of my way." He tried to push Harry away from the car.
"I left him," Harry said, his voice sounding desperate. "Please, Draco…I didn't want him to hurt you and I was so afraid of what he was going to do and I didn't…I just…I froze." He wiped at his tears then grabbed Draco's hand. "Please…it's my birthday today. I don't want to be alone."
Draco roughly pulled his hand away. "So, that's what this is about. You don't want to be alone on your birthday." It wasn't a question.
"That's not all," Harry insisted. "I wanted to be with you."
"Why?"
"I haven't felt safe in a very long time. But I feel safe when I'm with you."
Draco looked down into teary green eyes and was shocked to see how open and hopeful they looked. How could he possibly feel safe with me? I can't protect him. I can't even protect myself.
Harry was crying softly as he slowly moved closer to the blond. "Draco…can you just…" He cautiously slid his arms around Draco's slim waist and buried his face in his chest. When he realized that he wasn't being pulled closer, his tears came harder. "I know you hate me, but please… hold me."
Draco stood still for a long time, his arms at his sides, not really holding Harry, but not stopping him from holding on.
Harry turned his face up into Draco's neck. "I'm sorry," he whispered as he pressed a gentle kiss to the bruises on his throat. "I am so sorry. Please forgive me." He kissed him again. "I can't take it. Everyone in the entire world could hate me and I'd be fine…but not you." He let out a shaky breath which blew across the blond's ear. "Please, please forgive me."
Draco's hands were shaking as he let out a heavy sigh and finally wrapped his arms around Harry.
Harry let out a stuttering breath as he choked back a sob.
Draco swallowed hard. Harry's tears felt like fire on his skin. He stroked his thick, dark hair and held him tighter. "It's alright," he finally said, then he kissed Harry's head.
Harry clung tighter to him. "Thank you," he whispered into his neck. He sighed and his body began to relax as Draco continued to stroke his hair.
Draco was surprised to feel his own eyes tearing up. Damn it! Stop being a fucking baby! Malfoy's don't cry! He cleared his throat and stepped back from Harry's embrace.
Harry stared up at him with sad eyes.
Draco was pretty sure that his own eyes looked the same. "What now?" he asked with a slight shrug.
Harry shoved his hands into his pockets and gave a shrug of his own. "We could go get some tea," he suggested. "Or…we can go back inside." He motioned to the club.
Draco shook his head. "No…I don't think I'm ready to be alone with you again."
Harry looked away, hurt radiating off of him, but nodded in agreement. "I…I understand."
They stood in silence for a while, though it wasn't exactly uncomfortable.
Draco suddenly sighed.
Harry looked up at him, waiting for him to speak.
"When you told him…" Draco paused and cleared his dry throat, trying to rid his voice of any emotion. "When you said that I wasn't worth your time…"
Harry bit his lip and stepped closer.
Draco held up a hand. "No, let me finish."
Harry nodded and reluctantly stepped back.
"It's been a very long time since I've allowed someone to hurt me," Draco told him. "And my God, Harry… that really fucking hurt."
Harry looked away and nodded.
"Oliver could have done anything to me and it wouldn't have compared to the pain of knowing that I…that I don't matter to you."
Harry's breath caught in his throat as he looked back at Draco. "No," he said softly. "You matter, Draco. You matter so much. You have to believe that." He reached out and took the blond's hand in his.
Draco gave him a small, sad smile. "Can you really blame me for questioning it?"
Harry couldn't speak, so he just shook his head.
They fell into another silence.
Draco eventually let go of Harry's hand and motioned to the car.
They got in and situated before Harry finally spoke. "Where are we going?"
"I'm not sure," Draco admitted. "Do you want me to take you to Ron and Hermione's house?"
Harry slouched down in his seat. "They're angry with me at the moment. Don't think they'd be all that thrilled with me waking them at four a.m."
"How about your parents?"
Harry just shook his head and stared down at his hands.
Draco sighed softly and pulled out of the lot. "My flat then," he said softly.
"Thank you," Harry said, his voice hardly a whisper.
"Don't mention it."
They drove in silence for awhile before Draco's phone started vibrating against his hip. He pulled it out and looked at the caller ID to see Blaise & Pansy on the screen. He flipped it open. "Yes?"
"Draco, have you heard from Harry?" Pansy asked, her voice dripping with concern.
"Yes, he's here with me now. Why?"
She breathed a heavy sigh of relief. "Hermione called and said that Oliver called her in a rage because Harry ran out on him during a huge fight. She's worried sick about him."
"I'll have him call her."
"Thank you. Oh…Blaise is home so I'm hanging up now. I love you, darling."
"You too. Night." He turned the phone off and handed it to Harry. "Call Hermione. She's worried sick. And tell her that I'm bringing you over there right now."
Harry's face fell a little at hearing that they would not be going to Draco's flat. But he nodded and called her anyway.
It was almost 4:30 when Draco pulled the car up in front of the small cottage that Ron and Hermione owned together.
"This place is adorable," Draco said as he got out of the car and stretched.
The front door flew open and Hermione came flying down the steps in her pajamas and slippers. She threw her arms around Harry's neck and hugged him tightly.
"Hermione," Harry gasped. "I can't breathe."
Draco laughed softly. She's so much like Pansy, it's scary.
They made their way inside and sat down around the fire, each with a cup of tea.
"You can stay as long as you need to," Hermione told Harry as she gently rubbed his knee. "Ron will be so glad for the company."
"Where is he?" Draco asked.
"Ron could sleep through a hurricane," Hermione laughed softly. She looked at Harry for a moment and became completely serious again. "He worries…so I didn't want to wake him. He would've just paced a hole through the carpet." She tried to smile again, but it was full of sadness.
Draco sipped his tea as he watched Harry. The smaller man hadn't said a word, nor had he touched his tea since they sat down together. He just stared at his hands as he fiddled with the hem of his t-shirt.
Hermione suddenly stood. "Since I'm up, I might as well make breakfast." She turned to Harry. "Well birthday boy, what would you like?"
Harry looked up at her and faked a smile. "Anything is good, thanks."
A half hour later, Harry and Draco were sitting at the kitchen table waiting for Hermione to return with Ron.
"Are you alright?" Draco asked him.
Harry nodded, but said nothing.
Draco reached across the table and touched his hand. "What's wrong?"
Harry looked up at him. He stared into Draco's eyes for a long time before opening his mouth to speak. "It's just-"
"Happy birthday!" Ron cried as he entered the kitchen behind Harry.
Harry flinched and jerked his hand away from Draco, but he schooled his features and turned to his friend with a smile. "Why are you so happy this morning? It's only 5:30."
"And thanks to you, I'm getting a big fancy breakfast instead of my normal oatmeal and toast." Ron smiled and sat down next to Harry. He looked over at Hermione. "Not that your breakfasts aren't always great. You make the best oatmeal and toast I've ever had."
"Thank you, love." Hermione leaned over to kiss his head then began to serve the food.
There were eggs, bacon, toast, fresh fruit and hash browns. The three boys dug in as Hermione sat back and watched them and occasionally picked at slices of melon and strawberries.
"This is perfect, 'Mione," Harry said through a mouth full of eggs.
Draco frowned at his lack of manners. "You are disgusting."
Hermione snorted into her coffee.
Harry finished chewing and swallowed. He glared at Draco playfully, then turned to his friends and smiled.
When they were finished eating, Draco and Harry shooed Hermione away and cleaned up the kitchen while she and Ron got ready for work.
"I should go," Draco said once the last dish was dried.
Hermione grabbed her bag and keys. "I'll walk out with you."
"Oh…okay," Harry said softly. Breakfast had finally put a smile on his face, but that smile now vanished.
Ron grabbed his keys. "Happy birthday, mate." He gave Harry a one armed hug and a thump on the back, said goodbye to Draco and headed outside.
Hermione watched as Harry and Draco stood about a foot apart in the kitchen and just stared at each other. "I'm late…I should go," she lied. She wished Harry a happy birthday and kissed both of their cheeks before running out the door.
Draco smiled as he watched her hurry away. He looked back at Harry. "This was nice," he said as he stepped forward and pulled him into a hug.
Harry nodded against his shoulder. "You don't have to leave." His fingers held tightly to the back of Draco's shirt.
Draco pulled back just enough to look down at him. "But I should," he said softly. He brushed a few strands from those green eyes that he loved so much. Love? Watch yourself, Malfoy.
"But you don't have to," Harry said again, his lips curling slowly into a smile.
Draco couldn't help but smile back. "No…I don't have to," he admitted as he rested his forehead against Harry's.
Harry wrapped his arms around Draco's neck. "Can I kiss you?" he whispered.
Draco hesitated briefly before nodding once. He inwardly rolled his eyes at himself. Weakling! Way to give in. You couldn't even last a fucking day? But his thoughts were silenced by the feel of Harry's hands moving over him.
Harry slid his hands back to Draco's shoulders then brought them up to cup his face. His eyes fell on the cut and bruise on his lower lip. He leaned forward and gently kissed the wound then looked back up at Draco's eyes for any signs that he should stop.
Draco's hands were suddenly in Harry's hair and he pulled him into a deep, forceful kiss. God…it's been way too bloody long. He walked forward, pushing the smaller man against the wall and moving his lips to his neck.
Harry laughed. "This was my birthday wish," he said softly, then hissed as he felt Draco's teeth sink into his neck. His hiss of pain turned into a moan of pleasure as the blond began to suck lightly and lick at the small red mark he had made.
Draco pulled back and smiled as he examined his work. He lightly ran his fingertips over the bruise and looked into Harry's eyes. "I never really understood your fascination with marking me before. But I can see why now. There's something appealing about knowing that people will look at you and see a tangible sign of our passion." He leaned in and kissed him again.
"I want you so bad," Harry whispered as he wrapped his arms around the taller man's shoulders. "Take me to bed."
Draco laughed and nodded. "I suppose since it's your birthday, I really can't refuse you."
Harry smiled. "It would be rude."
Draco tucked Harry's hair behind his ears. "You need a haircut."
"No way. If I cut it, then you won't be able to always push it out of my eyes and tuck it behind my ears. I love when you do that."
Draco saw the honesty in Harry's green eyes and he felt the angry wall around his heart begin to melt. "You have no idea what you're doing to me, do you?" He took a step back, but never looked away from Harry's gaze.
Harry looked confused for a moment. "What does that mean?" He took Draco's hand and squeezed it. "Did I do something wrong?"
"No…not exactly." Draco gently pulled his hand away and folded his arms across his chest. "You have the strangest effect on me. I don't actually know yet whether it's a good thing or not, but when I'm with you, you're all that matters."
Harry smiled up at him, but still looked a bit unsure.
Draco reached out and stroked his cheek. "There are days that I wish I had never met you…that I had never stopped to buy coffee that I didn't even want just to talk to a boy who hummed Christmas songs in March."
Harry's smile grew into an ear to ear grin. "That's why you stopped in that day?"
Draco nodded and pulled his hand away from Harry's blushing face. "You intrigued me. Still do, to be honest."
Harry's smile faded. "But…why is that a bad thing?"
Draco shrugged. "I'm not sure that it is, really. I just don't like how I keep letting you hurt me." He looked into Harry's eyes and tried to smile. "I don't think I could handle you walking away again. Especially not to go back to him."
Harry stepped forward and took both of Draco's now trembling hands. "What just happened? You were two seconds away from dragging me to bed and now you're…sad?"
Draco squeezed Harry's hands. "I'm not really sad," he said softly. "I'm just…I'm trying to be cautious."
Harry gave him a small smile. "How about this…I'm going to the bedroom." He let go of Draco's hands and headed down the hall. He didn't look back when he next spoke. "I would love it if joined me, but if you can't do that, I'll understand." He disappeared into the room at the end of the hall.
Draco stood unmoving for a few minutes before mumbling a curse under his breath and making his way down the hall.
Stopping in the doorway, he groaned softly to himself as he looked at the now naked man who lay sprawled on his stomach on the bed.
Harry's arms were folded, his head resting on them as he looked at Draco. He smiled. "Hello."
Draco struggled to breathe. He briefly considered turning around and walking out the door, but he knew he was already done for. Just the sight of Harry's perfect arse had made him instantly hard. He licked his lips and swallowed. "Hi."
Harry rolled his hips and sighed softly to himself as the smooth quilt brushed over him.
Draco closed his eyes and breathed deeply. "Think Ron and Hermione want you soiling their blankets like that?" He returned his gaze to Harry's body, his eyes moving slowly over his strong back and down his legs.
Harry laughed softly. "This is my blanket. I got it from Mrs. Weasley and I left it here so Oliver wouldn't destroy it during one of his fits of anger. He's been known to destroy the things I love most."
Draco frowned. "Nice guy."
Harry shrugged. "I never claimed he was a nice guy."
"Yet you let him fuck you regularly?"
Harry shrugged again. "He's not who I want fucking me right now, so why does it matter?" He rolled onto his side and propped his head on an elbow, exposing his hardness to the blond. "Are you joining me or am I doing this alone?"
Draco stared at Harry's cock as he finally entered the room and shut the door behind him. He slowly started removing his clothes, never taking his eyes from the other's body.
Harry reached a hand down and began stroking himself.
A low, rumbling moan was released from Draco's lips before he even realized he was making a sound. He finished undressing a bit more quickly, then climbed onto the bed, slowly crawling towards the brunette who waited for him.
Harry got to his knees and moved to him, meeting him in the middle of the bed. He reached out to touch Draco's face, tracing his fingers slowly over his high cheekbones, over his pink lips and smooth chin and down to gently caress his bruised neck. A flash of sorrow went through his eyes as he bit down on his lower lip and looked away.
Draco sighed and took Harry's face in his hands. He moved closer until their bodies were touching, their erections pressing together, trapped between them.
"I missed you," Harry whispered.
Draco smiled softly and finally kissed him. Their lips moved slowly together, each of them savoring the others taste and feel as roaming hands touched and eager bodies pushed closer together.
Draco gently pushed Harry down onto his back. His tongue pressed deeper into the smaller man's mouth as his fingertips lightly ran down his chest, over his stomach and hip and finally brushed against his cock.
"No," Harry said against his lips. He pushed Draco's hand away and sat up.
Draco's heart gave a violent lurch in his chest as he stared up at Harry in confusion.
"This is about you this time," Harry said with a reassuring smile. He pressed Draco down onto the bed and straddled him. He moved their hips together as he kissed and licked at the blond's bruises.
"But it's your birthday," Draco protested halfheartedly. He closed his eyes and grunted as Harry gave a particularly hard thrust.
Harry chuckled against his neck. "You forgave me. That's present enough." His green eyes came up to meet silver and he smiled sadly, all sense of playfulness gone. "I want you to forget that pain." He ran his fingertips over his split lip and bruised neck. "I want you to be happy."
Draco stopped breathing. He had no idea how to respond to that, so instead he craned his neck, capturing Harry's lips in a gentle kiss.
Harry sighed into his mouth and ran his knuckles slowly down the length of Draco's arms. He entwined their fingers, bringing their hands up to rest on either side of Draco's head and slowly increased the depth of their kiss, while still keeping it soft, yet passionate.
Draco's fingers clenched tighter around Harry's as the brunette slowly trailed his lips over his face and down to his throat. He placed feather light kisses along his collarbones and shoulders, his tongue darting out occasionally to lick softly at his pale skin.
"Harry," Draco whispered.
He felt Harry smile against his shoulder and the soft touches moved back up to his neck, unerringly finding that sensitive spot right below his ear. Harry licked and sucked and rocked his hips, but it was never hard or fast, always slow and gentle.
Draco wasn't used to such tenderness in bed. Never had he had someone touch him so gently or kiss him so affectionately; it was almost too much to bear and it scared him. Part of him wanted Harry to bite him, or scratch him, or increase the speed of his thrusts. Anything to remove these...emotions he was feeling.
But a larger part of him never wanted this to end. His heart was racing faster than he could ever remember it racing before. There were butterflies in his stomach and a tightness in his chest that was indescribable.
Harry's mouth moved languidly down to his chest. He still gripped Draco's hands in his, though he brought them down to his sides, pinning them to the bed. His tongue lapped at a nipple, circling it slowly as he watched Draco's face from below dark lashes. Once satisfied, he moved on to the other nipple, giving it the same treatment as the first.
Draco sighed as he watched him. His cock was throbbing, aching to be touched, but Harry's body was no longer pressed tightly against him. He raised his hips, pushing himself into the brunette's stomach and moaned at the feel of the soft hairs below Harry's naval brushing against the head.
"I'm getting there, love…promise," Harry whispered against his heated skin. His thumbs stroked softly over the backs of Draco's hands, matching the pattern that his tongue and lips made on his body.
Draco was almost horrified when he heard himself whimper at the sensation of Harry's breath finally blowing over his painfully hard erection. He bit down hard on his lip and lifted his head, watching as Harry's lips brushed up and down the sides of his cock. He groaned deeply and dropped back on the pillow, closing his eyes and finally giving in to Harry's ministrations.
He felt Harry's tongue slowly circle the head and he longed to bury his fingers in his hair and guide him faster. But Harry's grip on his hands never faltered.
Lips sucked lightly at the head and his tongue flicked out, licking up a few drops of precum. Harry moaned at the taste and took him in further, pressing his lips tighter against Draco's hardness. His teeth scraped gently and slowly over the sensitive skin then he clamped his lips down and sucked hard as he pulled up.
"Christ," Draco whispered as his hips gave an involuntary jerk. "You're killing me, Harry."
Harry chuckled softly around Draco's cock, causing pleasant vibrations to run up through his groin. Draco cried out and flexed his hands, silently begging Harry to do it again.
Instead of chuckling, Harry began to hum.
When Draco heard the first notes of 'Carol of the Bells', he started to laugh. But his desire to laugh was quickly replaced by a deep moan and a desperate desire to come, which he knew was not far away.
Harry gently squeezed both of Draco's hands and unexpectedly, let go.
Draco tried to keep his hands still and at his sides, but one hard suck from Harry's mouth and his fingers were buried deep in soft, thick hair. He made sure not to pull, instead he gently massaged Harry's scalp, hoping he wouldn't stop whatever this was that he was doing to him.
Harry released Draco from his mouth and his lips moved lower, caressing his balls and licking them slowly. His fingers drew invisible patterns on his trembling thighs, then slid up to his cock and began to stroke him.
Draco's breath caught and he thought he was going to come right then, but Harry's hand was suddenly at the base of his cock, squeezing tightly to contain his orgasm. Draco gave a quiet sigh, half in disappointment and half in pleasure that this moment would continue, even if only for a few more minutes.
Then Harry looked up at him and smiled.
Draco knew at that moment that he had never seen anyone more beautiful.
Harry held eye contact as he changed his position and leaned back in to take Draco fully into his mouth. His licks came a bit faster and he sucked harder and deeper. Every time Draco moaned, Harry increased the pressure until it was almost too much for the blond to handle. But he still didn't want Harry to stop.
Draco panted as he struggled not to thrust up. He was close, so very, very close and the last thing he wanted was to ruin the moment. "Harry," he moaned loudly. "I can't…take it…please…"
Harry moved his mouth faster in response to Draco's begging. He wrapped his lips tightly around the head and pressed the flat of his tongue to the underside. He alternated between licking and sucking and he felt the shaking in Draco's legs that signaled his quickly approaching climax. He hummed again and gave one last suck.
Draco gripped the sheets and arched his back. He let out a loud, strangled cry as he pumped his hips up into Harry's warm mouth and came so hard that his vision started to go a bit fuzzy on him. He continued to thrust as Harry continued to suck and he felt the sting of tears in his eyes as pleasure overwhelmed him. When it finally became too much, he dropped back onto the bed and placed a hand on Harry's head, silently asking him to stop.
Harry slowly sat back on his knees and smiled at him.
"What…the bloody hell…was that?" Draco managed between heaving breaths.
Harry's smile grew into an ear to ear grin. "Did you like it?"
Draco reached out a hand to him. "What do you think?"
Harry crawled up into his arms and buried his face in his neck. "You deserved it." He kissed his shoulder and looked back up at him.
For the second time that day, Draco found himself speechless. He turned his face and kissed Harry's forehead, his hand sliding down between them to stroke him.
Harry stopped his hand. "I came when you did," he whispered.
Draco looked up at him in surprise. "What? But, how?"
Harry laughed and kissed him, this time a bit harder than his earlier kisses. "Watching you like that… seeing the expressions on your face and listening to the noises you made..." He shrugged. "I just… came."
Draco laughed and held him tighter. "Thank you for that, by the way. It was…astonishing."
Harry beamed at him and jumped up, straddling his hips again. He sat back on Draco's thighs and just stared down at him. "Now for my birthday present."
Draco's eyes grew wide. "You're going to have to give me a bit of time to recover after…whatever that was you just did."
Harry smirked at him. "If I recall correctly, you really don't need much recovery time."
"That was a fluke!" Draco argued, though he couldn't help returning Harry's smile as he remembered their first time together. "It was the excitement of the idea of buggering that perfect arse of yours."
Harry crawled to the edge of the bed, making sure his arse was directed at Draco the whole time. He glanced over his shoulder and laughed at the lustful expression on the blond's face, then he reached over the side of the bed and grabbed his bag.
"Ah, good…you brought your bag of lube."
"Shut up." Harry pulled out a few packets and tossed them over his shoulder to Draco.
Draco raised an eyebrow. "I seriously doubt we need three packets Harry."
Harry tossed his bag onto the floor and crawled back over to him. He smiled at the sight of Draco's growing erection and laid his body across the blond. "You never know."
"I haven't gotten it up four times in a day since I was sixteen."
"Well, I'll just have to make you feel sixteen again." He took Draco's half hard cock in his hand and began to stroke it slowly, knowing he was probably still sensitive.
"You are evil. First you do that warm and fuzzy thing that almost made me pass out and now you're so eager to have my cock in you that you're…" His words trailed off as Harry's hand twisted at the end of a stroke, causing a jolt of pleasure to run up his spine and a soft moan to escape his lips.
"I knew you couldn't resist me," Harry whispered. He kissed him hard, the complete opposite of their other kisses, and rapidly stroked him to full hardness.
Draco prepped him quickly, no longer able to contain the desire to have Harry wrapped around him.
"I'm ready," Harry argued.
"No, you're not."
Harry pushed his hands away and pressed him back into the mattress. "Yes, I am." He climbed on top of him and guided him to his opening. He held his breath as he lowered himself and cried out softly as Draco sank deep inside of him.
"Of fuck…Jesus, Harry…"
"Good?"
Draco nodded as his hands gripped Harry's thighs. "Yeah."
Harry smiled as he began to ride him slowly. "I've never…done it…like this." He experimentally shifted his hips and threw his head back, moaning softly when he finally found the right angle.
Draco had to fight his eyes rolling into the back of his head as Harry increased the speed. He had thought he had been deep before, but this…this was something completely different.
When Harry found his rhythm, Draco started pushing his hips up into him. He ran his hands over his tense thighs, scratching lightly with his nails, leaving long, pink marks. He was still sensitive from Harry's amazing blow job and he could already tell that he wouldn't last long this round. "Wait… Harry…I'm not…" He arched his back and moaned as the brunette slammed himself down against him. "Shit…I won't last…unless…slow down…"
"Can't…fuck…" His eyes grew wide and he moved faster. He leaned forward slightly, resting his hands on Draco's chest to balance himself. "Oh God…Draco…" He squeezed his eyes shut and pushed down harder against him.
Hoping to make Harry come first, Draco took his cock in hand and pulled fast and hard while pumping his hips up into him in an almost violent manner.
Harry's body trembled and a fine sheen of sweet broke out over his brow. His mouth fell open and he dropped his head, resting his chin on his chest. "Draco," he whimpered softly.
Draco pulled him down into a desperate kiss, his hips still moving and his hand still stroking his erection.
Harry wrapped his arms tightly around Draco's neck, pulling him up into a sitting position. He buried his face in the blond's neck and panted heavily as he wrapped his legs around Draco's waist and thrust his hips against him.
Draco's hand gripped Harry's arse, guiding their frantic motions. He bit down lightly on Harry's shoulder then started sucking and licking, anything he could think of to help the brunette get there before he did.
Harry's mouth was pressed right under his ear and Draco shivered at the sound and feel of his heavy breathing. "Lean back on your hands," he whispered.
Harry reluctantly let go of Draco's neck and leaned back, placing both hands flat on the bed. He gasped and bucked at the new angle and a smile broke out over his tired face.
Gripping Harry's hip tightly with one hand, Draco began to guide him forward and back, slamming deep into him with each thrust.
Harry's arms began to shake and he squeezed his eyes shut. A frantic flood of quiet begging started to spill from his mouth.
Draco was sweating with the strain of holding back his orgasm. Harry was growing tighter and tighter around him and he cursed softly when he felt the tingling in the soles of his feet and the almost painful tightening of his balls. Not yet…not yet…not yet…
Harry's arms gave out suddenly and he collapsed onto his back with a wordless shout. Draco continued to guide him back and forth and watched in awe as Harry came all over himself, thick spurts of come splashing over his chest and dripping down his stomach. Harry trembled with pleasure and exhaustion. He ran his fingers over his chest, coating them in come, then brought the fingers to his lips and sucked them into his mouth.
Watching Harry taste himself was all it took and Draco came with a loud shout of his own, only he managed to say Harry's name before he collapsed onto the bed, out of breath.
*.*.*.*
He was sitting on the windowsill, half hanging outside, while he smoked his third consecutive cigarette. He heard rustling in the bed behind him, but he didn't turn around.
"What time is it?" Harry said through a yawn.
"Just after ten," Draco said. He flicked the butt out the window and turned to his raven haired lover.
Harry stared at Draco's bare chest as he pulled his boxers up over his hips. "You are so sexy." He walked over to the blonde and kissed him slowly while trailing his fingertips over his skin.
Draco smiled into the kiss, then pulled away and went back to the bed. He crawled in, pulling the sheet over him, then held an arm out to Harry in silent invitation.
Harry crawled up next to him and slid under the covers. He buried his face in Draco's neck and took a deep breath. "I love how you smell," he whispered then kissed his ear. "It's like fresh air and honey."
Draco ran his fingers over Harry's back and sighed in contentment. This is nice. I like being this way with him.
"Can I ask you something?" Harry asked as he rested his cheek over Draco's heart.
"Of course."
"You said it had been a long time since you allowed yourself to get hurt."
Draco nodded for him to continue.
"What happened? Who was he?"
Draco was still and silent for a long moment before his hand went back to stroking Harry's shoulder and neck. "It was Blaise," he said softly.
Harry became still as well. When he realized he was holding his breath, he exhaled slowly. "What did he do?"
Draco untangled himself from Harry and lay down on his side. "He didn't mean to do anything."
Harry mirrored Draco's position so they were lying facing each other.
Draco took one of Harry's hands and played with it while he spoke. "He's been my best friend since we were seven. I loved him. I was in love with him."
"You told him?" Harry asked as he watched Draco run his fingertips over his palms.
Draco nodded. "I couldn't stand it any more, so after graduation, before I left for university, I just blurted it out one day."
"What did he say?"
"That he already knew. Pansy told him when we were fourteen. I don't know how she knew at that time, but she did." Draco smiled softly and looked up at Harry. "I hadn't even admitted being gay yet."
Harry gently ran his fingers over Draco's mouth, then leaned in and gave him a soft kiss. "Go on."
"He and I talked for a long time that night. He was so supportive and understanding, but he was with Pansy and he knew that they were going to get married some day. He said that he had never looked at me like that and then he held me for hours while I cried."
Harry gently kissed Draco's hand.
"He proposed to Pansy a few weeks later. A lot of people thought they were too young to be married, but if you could have seen them, Harry…" He smiled a wide smile. "There was no reason for them to wait. They were just meant to be." He shifted closer to Harry and rested his head on his shoulder. "They set a date for late October of that year, just four months after graduation. I was Blaise's best man, so I drove in the day before and we stayed in a hotel so Pansy could stay at their flat. So, the night before the wedding, he snuck into my room claiming to have the jitters. We lay in bed for an hour before he suddenly kissed me. I tried to resist. I knew it was wrong. Pansy has been one of my best friends for almost as long. But I couldn't help it. We…we had sex…and I cried the entire time because as perfect as it was, I knew it was never going to happen again."
Harry wrapped his arms around Draco's shoulders and kissed the top of his head. "Did Pansy ever find out?"
Draco was silent for a moment then nodded. "She knew immediately. She never said anything to Blaise, but she and I discussed it. She said that it had to happen in order for her and Blaise to be happy. That he would have always wondered about it." He laughed softly. "She actually thanked me and refused my numerous apologies and she said if I disappeared from their lives, they would hunt me down and kill me. And that was that."
Harry smiled. "She's amazing."
Draco nodded. "She really is."
Harry took Draco's chin in his hand and tilted his head up. "So are you," he said softly. He kissed him deeply. "You better be careful or next thing you know, I'll have fallen in love with you." He kissed him again, then rolled on top of him, straddling his hips. "I just can't get enough of you."
Draco sighed softly as Harry's lips brushed over his neck. "Would it really be so bad to fall in love with me?"
Harry just kept kissing his neck as he mumbled something.
"What was that?" Draco took Harry's face in his hands and forced him to look at him. "Would it? Would falling in love with me be a bad thing?"
Harry stared into his eyes and smiled. "Yes," he said then kissed him again.
Draco felt like his heart was being torn from his chest, but for some reason, he couldn't bring himself to make Harry stop kissing him.
Draco couldn't sleep. He was physically exhausted from his morning in bed with Harry, but his mind wouldn't shut down. You are such a fool Malfoy. Letting yourself be used like this. Whatever happened to your sense of pride? He looked down at the mess of black hair that was resting on his chest and felt a pang of sorrow deep inside of him.
Harry was sound asleep, his mouth slightly open and a soft snoring sound escaping with every breath.
Draco stroked his dark hair as he thought about their last conversation. It would be a bad thing to love me. And he said it with a smile on his face. He frowned at the thought.
Harry stirred a bit and whimpered softly in his sleep, his mouth tightening into a thin line and turning down at the corners. "Stop," he said softly.
"Hey," Draco whispered as he pulled the shaking boy closer. "Shh…it's just a dream, Harry." He stroked his back and hair and kissed his head. "It's alright. It's only a dream."
Harry struggled weakly against him, then rolled off of Draco and onto his back before falling back into a peaceful sleep.
Draco used the opportunity to get out of bed and get dressed. He watched Harry sleep for a few more minutes before grabbing a pen and paper from the desk by the bed. He sat down and thought hard about what he wanted to say before beginning.
"Dear Harry,
I didn't wake you because I have a few things that I need to get off my chest and for some reason, I can't seem to say them when you look at me. So I'm taking the cowards way out and writing you this letter. But if I'm not mistaken, you know how that feels.
First…this has to stop. As much fun as we have in bed, it's the out of bed part that worries me. We seem to fight an awful lot for two people who have only spent a grand total of about 24 hours together. I'm sure if you think about it, you will see it the same way. Simply put, you and I don't work.
Second…please, please, please don't go back to Oliver. Even though I'm telling you that I no longer wish to continue seeing you, that doesn't mean that I don't care about you. I care more than I probably should, which is part of the problem. Oliver is like poison and if you go back to him, I fear you will die. And that might just break me. Call me selfish if you want to, just please don't go back.
Third…be careful with your future lovers. Remember their feelings before you speak, even if it's only one small word that seems completely innocent. You never know what it is that will finally shatter someone's heart, especially one already fragile.
I guess that's it really. I know it's not a lot, and these things may not seem too important, but they were things I had to say before it was too late. I hope life is better to you than it has been so far. Hold on to Ron and Hermione with all your might. They'll never let you down.
All my love, Draco."
He reread it a few times before folding it up and propping it on the nightstand by Harry's glasses.
He sighed softly and tried to shake off the almost unbearable sadness that seemed to be overwhelming him. He grabbed his keys and phone, placed a quick kiss on Harry's forehead and slowly backed out the door. He turned the knob before pulling the door shut to keep the 'click' from waking his dozing lover. Ex-lover he reminded himself. He stood there with his hand on the knob and his forehead pressed against the smooth wood, squeezing his eyes shut and forcing himself to breathe. You can do this Malfoy…just walk away.
Draco jumped when he heard a throat being cleared behind him. He spun around to find Hermione standing at the end of the hall with her arms folded. She looked at him in confusion.
Draco held a finger to his mouth as he silently made his way to her side.
"Where are you going?" she asked as she followed him into the living room.
"Why are you home?" Draco ignored her question and sat down on the couch to slip on his shoes.
"A late lunch, thought I'd come check on the two of you and see if you had surfaced for air yet." She sat down beside him. "Where are you going?"
"I'm leaving."
"Why?"
"Because I have to." He stood and headed for the door.
"Draco-"
"No, I have to, Hermione." He stopped and forced himself to face her. "I have to leave him before he leaves me."
She stared at him in silence, and then slowly nodded her head when she realized that she could come up with no reassurances for the blonde. Her brown eyes filled with tears as she took a step closer to him. "Oh, Draco."
He hurried to her and hugged her tightly. "Don't."
She clung to him. "I'm so sorry that you got hurt," she mumbled into his chest.
He kissed the top of her head and released her. "Thank you for breakfast."
She managed a small smile and nodded.
He slipped quietly out the door and hurried to his car before he had a chance to change his mind.
As he quietly shut the car door, he glanced up to see Harry standing at the open window of the room they had shared. He was reading Draco's letter, a frown plastered on his face.
Draco started the car and watched as Harry looked up at him, his green eyes wide and confused. He leaned out the window. "Draco!" he yelled.
Draco ignored him and pulled away. He managed to drive the half hour to his flat, walk upstairs, change into his pajamas and climb into bed before he finally, for the first time in six years, allowed himself cry.
TBC
AN: Thank you all for reading! Hope you enjoyed it. Til next time…