Chapter Fourteen

Starsky was transferred up to a room for close observation.

As the afternoon waned into the evening Starsky started to stir again, his movements once more becoming restless. Hutch repeated the same process he had done in the ER of gently reassuring his partner his was safe and each time, after a few minutes, he would drift back off to sleep.

When Starsky finally did open his eyes a few hours later he stared glassily up until something triggered in his mind and the indigo orbs darkened into distress then fear. His breathing became rapid and he tried to sit up. Hutch was immediately by his side reassuring him as he eased him back down.

"It's okay, buddy. I'm here and you're safe."

Starsky pushed against him, his eyes darting about, but Hutch simply took his hand and interlocked their fingers together then brought it up against his chest. With the other he cupped the uninjured side of the curly head.

Starsky blinked several times before his eyes seemed to focus and locked on Hutch. In them the tall blond could still see the confusion, the fear, but also thankfully their trust.

"Close your eyes, buddy and go back to sleep. You're safe. Just rest, babe. I'll be right here."

Starsky nodded and the heavy lids descended back down.

~S/H~

Huggy stopped by shortly before visiting hours were scheduled to end. He found Hutch slumped uncomfortably in the chair.

"How's he doing?" he asked as he looked over at the still figure lying in bed.

Hutch painfully un-pretzeled himself. "He's starting to come around more, but he's still pretty confused and agitated."

"He's been through quite a lot."

Hutch nodded. "Damn staff in the ER didn't help."

After filling Huggy in on the events that had happened on the roof and in the ER, Hutch raked his fingers tiredly through his hair then down his face.

Huggy saw the exhausted, worried lines plastered on his face. "You okay, Blondie?"

"I will be as soon as he wakes up with a full stack. God, Huggy. I almost lost him!"

"Hey, man. Don't dwell on it. You got him back safe and he's going to be okay and that's all that counts, right?"

Hutch nodded.

The black man watched the myriad of emotions flashing across the man's face: fear, gratitude, relief and worry. They were all written there and Huggy knew he wouldn't really be back to his old self until Starsky was awake and whining to go home.

In the meantime, what Hutch needed was some food, definitely a shower and a friend.

The first part Huggy unloaded from one of two paper sacks he'd brought with him, a turkey stack sandwich on whole grain bread with alpha sprouts and goat cheese. He shoved it in Hutch's face and refused to budge until he'd consumed all of it.

The next was a little more difficult seeing the protective cop was reluctant to leave Starsky's side for longer than it took to take a necessary bathroom break. But again, Huggy had insisted, pulling a set of clean clothes and toiletries out of the second paper sack he'd brought, having stopped by Hutch's apartment on his way over.

Huggy steered him towards the bathroom, unconcerned it was technically for the patient's use only, with the adamant promise he'd "guard" Starsky from the staff while he took a quick shower. Less than ten minutes later his was back out, his hair still wet but in a fresh change of clothes.

"Thanks, Hug."

The black man nodded glad to see a little color and energy back in the blond.

"By the way, Dobey stopped by and showed me and Anita that mug shot."

Hutch, who was still busy drying his hair with a towel, asked, "Was it one of the drunks?"

"No. But Anita thought he did look kinda familiar. He may have been another customer at the bar."

Hutch racked his brains. He still couldn't figure out who this Henry Wallace was and why'd he'd wanted to attack Starsky. Perhaps it had been a random act, an attempt at robbery? But no. That didn't fit either, because Levi had stolen most of Starsky's possessions after he'd been initially attacked.

He supposed he wouldn't really know the answer until the bastard was picked up.

The PA system throughout the hospital announced the end to visiting hours. Huggy got up and said his goodbyes. The nursing staff had already been alerted to the fact the detective was staying the night.

"Take care, Blondie, and call the Bear if you need anything or when Seeping Beauty over here finally wakes up."

"I will. Thanks, Huggy."

Huggy paused at the door. "And keep in mind you don't have exclusive rights on Curly. We all care about him too. We just all understand its best not to get in the way of the Big Blond in Mother Hen mode, dig?"

Hutch laughed. "I dig."

Huggy cocked his head and ambled out the door.

After Huggy left, Hutch settled back into the hard plastic visitor's chair.

In addition to the food and the clothes, Huggy had also brought Hutch a book to read. It was actually one Hutch had started some time ago and had left on his nightstand, never having gotten around to it. He tried to read, but found his eyes constantly wandering back over to the sleeping form.

Shortly after eleven, the night nurse came in to check on her patient. She was a tall, heavy set older black lady with half moon glasses and a stern look to her features. Hutch decided it best to stay out of her way as she went about her duties.

When she was finished she stood over him, arms crossed at her chest.

"Heard about all the trouble you caused downstairs, young man," she told him. "And I'm going to tell you right now I'm not going to put up with any of that nonsense up here, you understand?"

Hutch opened his mouth to say something but found a raised palm in his face.

"Uh-uh. Don't go there with me. You behave yourself and we'll get along just fine."

She marched back out.

About an hour later Starsky stirred again, his head moving agitatedly back and forth seeming to be caught up in a nightmare. He moaned, twisting his body and clawing at the sheets.

Hutch was at his side instantly.

"Hey, buddy. It's okay. I'm right here," he crooned.

The agitated movements continued, but Hutch countered each with a firm but gentle touch to an arm, a wrist, preventing Starsky from injuring himself or trying to get out of bed.

Starsky opened his eyes, but Hutch could tell they weren't really seeing him. They were glassy and filled with pain. "Hurts."

"What hurts, babe?" Hutch asked, concerned.

"The ropes. Can you take them off?"

"They're off buddy. No one's restraining you anymore."

He looked up at him then and his eyes were suddenly filled with such sadness. "Reese is dead."

"Reese?"

Starsky nodded. "I'm sorry, Sarge. I tried. I really did, but I couldn't stop them. They'd already gotten Connelly and Sullivan…and then Reese," he whimpered. "They didn't have to do that to him."

A tear slipped down the corner of his eye and it was then Hutch realized Starsky was caught up in some hellish flashback of his past from Vietnam.

Hutch brushed the wetness away with his fingers and then brought his hand up and gently stroked it through the soft curls.

"It's okay, Starsky. I'm sure you did everything you could."

"He was begging me to help him, Sarge, but I couldn't. I was tied up and gagged. He was just a kid, just a scared kid…"

He heard the tortured guilt in his friend's voice and his heart broke.

Just a kid…Like how much older had you been, partner? Hutch thought angrily.

"Then when they were done they just left us both down there in the dark and oh God, Sarge, I couldn't do anything, anything but listen to him die right there next to me…he took so long to die…"

More tears slipped down the injured man's face and Hutch swallowed hard. The vivid imagery of what his partner had gone through was difficult for him to bear until Starsky's next words left him cold.

"And then he just stopped…stopped making any sounds at all. And I knew. I knew, Sarge I was all alone…"

Oh my god! Starsk…No wonder Cabrillo had triggered those nightmares! Why didn't you tell me, buddy? Why?

But Hutch already knew the answer. His partner was stubborn and proud as much as he was a fighter and survivor and as long as Hutch had ever known him, he was not one to back down from his fears, no matter how terrifying.

But Starsky had painful memories of loss, separation and trauma that sometimes came back to haunt him, despite his best intentions not to dwell in the past. Scars that ran hellishly deeper than his own: his dad being killed in front of him and then being shipped off to be raised by relatives on another coast, forced to leave behind family, friends and all that he knew…Being drafted and spending eighteen months in a living hell only to come back to protestors screaming at him and society shunning him. Terrie…loving her and then forced to watch her die, knowing the bullet lodged in her brain had been put there by a madman seeking revenge…And others: Bellomy and Marcus and the sixteen year old boy Jackson he'd been forced to kill.

Each Hutch knew had ripped gashes into his friend's heart and had left deep painful scars behind.

Hutch cupped his partner's face in both hands, wiping the tracks of tears away with his thumbs, his heart bleeding for his best friend. He could only imagine how terrifying, how very isolating he must have felt, bound, gagged and defenseless.

"It's okay babe. You're not alone anymore. Shhhhh…Don't think about it…It's all just a dream, buddy, just a dream…"

He continued to softly comfort his partner, moving one hand from his check back up the curly hair until at last Starsky's body relaxed and gradually he drifted back off into a more restful sleep.

So wrapped up in his need to sooth his friend's pain away, Hutch hadn't heard the nurse return. When he became aware of her presence, he dutifully stepped aside and allowed her to re-evaluate her patient. Her features remained stern as she went about her duties.

Hutch took the opportunity to stretch out his kinked back and his sore knee, grimacing from the stiffness he felt from head to toe. When she was done, she left the room without a word.

Hutch returned to Starsky's bedside and tucked the blanket up over his shoulders. Once he had assured himself that his partner was still peacefully sleeping, did he returned to his quiet vigil in the uncomfortable chair.

A short while later the nurse returned, and to his surprise, she handed him a pillow.

"Well? Don't just sit there with your mouth hangin' open. Take it and put in behind your lower back. It will help."

Hutch accepted the pillow. "Thank you."

She tipped her head curtly and again left the room, her stern features never changing.

A few hours later, Starsky awoke again, blinking several times but this time Hutch noticed his eyes seemed a little clearer.

He smiled down at him. "Hey, buddy. How are you?"

"Hutch?" he asked weakly.

"Yeah, babe. It's me. I'm here."

"Thirsty."

Hutch poured some water into a plastic cup with a straw in it and held it to his partner's mouth. Starsky took a few sips, then coughed.

"Easy, not too fast."

Starsky took one more sip before Hutch withdrew the water.

The dark lashes blinked several times. "'M'in 'ospital?"

"Yeah, babe. You're in the hospital."

His brows knitted worriedly. "Cabrillo?"

"No. You're not at Cabrillo, Starsky. You're at Memorial."

He looked at Hutch, eyes imploring, sad, lost. "Am I sick?"

The question took Hutch by surprise and he immediately understood what Starsky was really asking.

Hutch took his hand in his, held it firmly. "No, buddy. You've got bump on your head and are a little confused at the moment, but you're NOT sick. Understand?"

Starsky nodded.

Hutch watched as Starsky seemed to struggle to clear the cotton from his mind a little more. Then his eyes darkened and he quickly looked up.

"On the roof…I…Did I hurt you?"

"No Starsk. You didn't hurt me," he assured.

Hutch saw a tear slip from his eye.

"M'sorry. Thought you were…"

He brushed it away. "I know, babe. Don't worry about it. It's all over now."

Exhaustion washed over Starsky's face again and within a few minutes he was asleep.

Twice more throughout the night Hutch had to gently but physically restrain him and twice more he had to witness the immensity of his partner's guilt at not being able to save a young solider and of the fear of being left alone in the dark waiting for his executioners to come back swirled together with the imagery of Cabrillo and his role as Rudy Skyler the mental patient being restrained and gagged and left in the dark.

Hutch settled Starsky down again, and each time he did, his touch lingered passed the point where his partner's fingers became lax as he fell back to sleep, just grateful to have him back.

TBC...