A/N: Bet you guys thought I forgot about this story! Apologies… Life has been very busy, but whatever it is, the next chapter is finally here! Sorry about uploading then removing this chapter at first, because I was having problems with that darned horizontal ruler!

Remus woke up the next morning to an incessant tapping. Blearily, he rubbed his eyes and looked around blindly for the source of the noise. Then he caught sight of Hedwig, beak still tapping against the window, body almost invisible in the snowstorm outside.

The Order; shit-!

Guilt and despair surged through him. Careful not to wake the sleeping Fenrir, he stretched over the man, and just managed to latch his hands onto the windowsill. He opened the window, and Hedwig immediately dumped the letter onto the bed. Quickly, she took off, obviously bothered by having to wait outside in the chill for so long.

Despite himself, Remus quickly unfolded the letter. He'd have to read it sooner or later anyway. With trembling hands, he glanced through its contents.

Dear Remus,

I hope everything is fine over there. Many in the Order are disgruntled by your lack of action. I have to admit, dear, there was a sufficient time period for you to contact us that Christmas Day… I suppose you have your own reasons, perhaps the situation was a bit more…complex? I have since been trying to convince them to give you more time; but they seem so keen to dismantle the werewolf pack, I should warn you, they might carry out a surprise attack soon- keep yourself safe when it happens. Teddy and I miss you terribly.

Love,

Tonks

He slipped the letter into his back pocket as soon as he was done. He felt horrified, and sickened at himself. There was his wife, trying to keep his reputation intact back in the Order, whilst he was here, happily committing an extramarital affair with the man who had ruined his life when he was six.

Suddenly, a hand clapped against the small of his back. It was a gentle motion, but it felt like a slap, a reminder of the terrible crime he was committing here.

"Be a good boy, and shut the window. You're letting the snow in."

He complied silently.

"Turn and face me, would you?"

Without waiting for Remus' response, Fenrir grasped his waist and pulled him towards him. Remus lay uncomfortably on top of Fenrir. Their eyes met for a brief moment, before Remus' averted. He let out a shaky breath and placed his head upon the other man's chest.

"You're still thinking about them," Fenrir muttered, a look of distaste on his face at that thought. Remus whimpered and pressed himself closer to the man's warmth. He felt so pathetic. For a moment, he wanted to tell Fenrir about the letter, about the emotional turmoil he had been going through- but any fool would know that that would be a terrible choice.

I have to wean myself off my feelings for him. I just feel this way for him because I am so sick of being alone. It's time you learnt to be lonely, Remus.

"I hate it when you're like this," Fenrir said aloud, "I don't understand why it is so hard for you to leave them behind."

"It's hard when they're the only things I ever felt that I had!" Remus shot back, despite himself. He could feel Fenrir looking at him in a rather confused and disappointed manner. That was all the response he got. Fenrir, after all, was not one to say something ridiculously sappy, something along the lines of, "But you have me now!" or "I will always be yours, silly boy!"

Remus sighed painfully, rolling off Fenrir and back to his side of the bed. The back of his head was throbbing crazily. Fenrir sat up and surveyed Remus silently. There was no point getting him out of bed, he decided. He rolled his eyes and pushed himself off the creaking bed.

"Fine, stay here. When I return, we're going to pack. Got to get out and find that damned family before the year ends."

As Fenrir slipped on his thick jacket, he glanced out of the corner of his eyes to see if the other man responded; but Remus was too tired and unfocused to protest.

Remus spent the next two hours lying quietly on his spot of the bed, absentmindedly twirling the corner of the blanket. He had been thinking about all the events lined up for him in the days leading to the New Year. There was nothing he could do about them, he supposed, but to just play along.

As for the issue of his family and Fenrir, he had made a decision- for the short term.

"Always live for the present, screw the future!" He vaguely remembered Sirius cheerfully chirping those words before getting Remus to participate in one of their infamous pranks.

I would be happier if I enjoy whatever I have now, and stop being held back by something that's in the past, or something that's so distant from me. It's selfish, but who isn't selfish, especially in a war? I could die tomorrow, for all I know.

You don't even like Tonks that much, anyway; a voice in his head smirked.

Fenrir entered the room silently, almost as if he was afraid of disturbing Remus. However, what met him completely contrasted with the glum man in the morning.

Remus was up and about, packing the last of the necessities neatly into his travelling bag. His clothes had been straightened and his hair showed attempts of being tamed. Upon seeing Fenrir, Remus waved cheerily over to him. Like a little boy, he carried the travelling bag over proudly, showing it to Fenrir, and said, "I think I've packed all that we need to bring!"

Fenrir hid his surprise well, as he gave his mind time to register this sudden revitalization of Remus. He peered through the bag, and scowled mockingly, "You forgot the tent."

"Tent? Don't werewolves go all natural and sleep under the stars?" Remus asked curiously. Fenrir lightly swatted his head as if offended. "It's crazy cold out there," he grunted, reaching casually behind Remus for the tent. Forcing it into the bag, he looked at the obviously humoured Remus and snapped, "What's so funny?"

Remus slipped his hands into his pockets and racked his brains for a non-offensive answer.

"Modernisation."

Downstairs, the rest of the male werewolves were already out, and mingling around, in anticipation. The women were to stay back to maintain the house and tend to the children. Seeing Fenrir and Remus entering, the males started filtering out of the door, not bothering to hide their relief at finally getting to get out of the suffocating house.

Fenrir crossed his arms and leant against the door, watching Remus give the children individual goodbye hugs. He smirked and called out, "You should have been born a girl, Remus." The young girl in Remus' arms giggled, and the women chuckled behind their hands. Remus stuck out his tongue at Fenrir, and finished saying his goodbye to the rest of the children.

Taking one long last look at the children, Remus slid his hand into Fenrir's and they strode out into the white world together. Remus felt much better than he did in the morning. Definitely, the letter was still on his mind, but he tried his best to keep it from interfering with his feelings. There would be a way to sort things out in the end, he assured himself; he had a good feeling about things right now.

"Where to, Alpha?" Fenrir's right hand man queried, blearily looking around the thick falling snow, illuminated by the devastatingly bright winter sun. They could hardly pick up a scent.

"I've received some information from the Death Eaters about their latest known whereabouts. They could have moved since then, but they can't have gone far. Just follow me," Fenrir said to the pack. He briefly described the area the family was supposedly at, before signaling to them to follow his tracks.

Fenrir clasped his hand with Remus' again, and slowly, the pack started making its way into the snow-covered woods. Remus could feel the chilling wind bite at his skin underneath the thin layers of his clothes. His legs were buckling slightly and it was almost too painful to look straight ahead. Shuddering, he said to Fenrir under his breath, "Perhaps today isn't a good day to start out."

Smiling wanly at him, Fenrir took off his jacket and flumped it over both their bodies. Remus pressed himself closer to Fenrir. He could see though, from the way the other man's breath was so visible in the glistening snow, Fenrir was just as cold as he was. He hung his head in slight embarrassment at having taken away some of the man's warmth. He decided to make up for it by smiling and doing his best to chat animatedly to Fenrir throughout the arduous trek.

Darkness quickly fell due to the short winter day. Fenrir loudly cussed at the hasty sun. The werewolves could continue their walk even in pitch black darkness, but Fenrir, sensing that most of the pack was weary from trudging through what seemed like subzero temperatures, called it a day.

Relief and gratitude swept through the pack, as they started unpacking their items and setting up tents. It was an odd sight to Remus. He felt that he should make himself useful though, and so he got started on Fenrir's tent.

When everyone was done, they settled in a circle around Fenrir. Fenrir looked exceptionally pale- Remus then realised Fenrir had left his jacket draped over him- but happy.

"Good job, you lot. We covered near half the distance. Go get some rest and food. We'll definitely be there by tomorrow night. When we get there, we'll rest and wait, until the next night, when the full moon will appear. Then we strike."

A murmur of satisfaction swept through the werewolves at their leader's concrete action plan. They swiftly started on their dinners. Remus didn't have much appetite though. He was worried for the family.

"Do we necessarily need to kill them?" he questioned Fenrir, as the man sat down next to him, already munching on his portion. Fenrir nodded, swallowing, and turning to look at Remus.

"You're still not used to this, hm."

Remus quickly responded to avoid a repeat of today's miserable morning, "Truthfully, I'm not, but eventually I will, Alpha!" He forced a smile out. Fenrir seemed to have bought his act, as he grinned back, "Finish up, it's getting cold."

Out of pity, and for the sake of the pack's well being, Remus went around casting a heating charm in everyone's tents. The werewolves grunted their thanks, and even Fenrir's right hand man begrudgingly managed one. Fenrir beamed with pride at Remus' work.

"You couldn't have cast it on us earlier, when we began our walk, though?" he joked, jabbing Remus between his ribs. Remus swore at himself for forgetting, and felt a bit self-conscious after that. Fenrir barked a laugh, arm snaking around Remus' waist. "It's okay, we should spend more time together," he said, voice soaked with intended sappiness, but still managing to cause the colour in Remus' face to rise.

Inside Fenrir's considerably larger tent, Remus zipped up the entrance and silently went over to lie beside Fenrir. The other man pressed a chaste kiss onto his lips, before sliding a hand onto the back of Remus, bringing his body closer. Remus shivered at the contact of cold skin.

"Goodnight, Fenrir," he smiled. The man leant forward for another quick kiss, before mumbling something similar back to Remus. Both men kept steady eye contact, not quite knowing what to say to the other, until the exhausted Fenrir fell asleep first.

Once Remus was sure Fenrir was fast asleep, he cautiously slipped out of the man's grasp, and crawled towards the entrance. Casting a Silencing charm, he unzipped the entrance so that it was just wide enough for half of his body to fit through.

He didn't want to do this, but he had boundaries for his selfishness, and risking the life of an innocent family for his affections for a certain werewolf was past those lines. Taking out the letter Tonks had sent him in the morning, he turned it to its unused side and scribbled furiously.

Dear Tonks,

What happened on Christmas requires too much explanation, so I will leave it out here. Important point is, the pack will be attacking an innocent family soon. They are at a clearing at the north of the woods. The pack will be there by tomorrow night, and will attack on the next night when the full moon rises. Please tell the order to find a way to stop them; I can't do much myself.

Love,

Remus

Proofreading his letter swiftly, Remus noticed that there was a lack of emotion, namely love, in his letter –it sounded so businesslike and direct. He simply shrugged it off though. Careful to avoid looking at the man comfortably sleeping behind him to protect himself from another mental conflict, he sent a signal out to Hedwig. He then placed the letter just outside the tent, and zipped the entrance back up.

Wearily, he sat there, waiting for the flurry of wings. Sooner than he expected, he heard that familiar rustle, and a soft hoot. He unzipped the entrance just a tiny bit, and saw Hedwig just about to take off. She saw him, and tilted her head to a side, as if acknowledging his friendly presence. Then, she quietly flew off into the darkness, disappearing from view.

Remus breathed easily after that. Zipping the tent back up, he gladly crawled back to the arms of Fenrir. Now that that letter was out of sight, it was out of his mind. There was a tinge of regret, to be sure, but this was a war, after all. He could be selfish, but he still had to remember, at crucial points like this, where his loyalties truly lay.

He snuggled closer to Fenrir, breathing in his scent, knowing that this would be one of the last times he would get to be so near the man. He didn't want think about tomorrow.

Always live for the present, screw the future!

Tomorrow would be a different day. Different in what way, he didn't need to know for now.

A/N: I'm so glad I finally got this chapter out of my head! Thanks to all who have still been patiently waiting!