The second chapter of the PCMSPS finale, in which something happens.
OOOOO
Insert Dramatic Finale Here
Act 1: Robot for Robot
OOOOOO
"I still say the flying pinwheels were best!"
"They were okay, but the moose was better."
"You two in the back! Pipe down!"
"We're in a desert with no one around for miles! Who'll hear us?"
"Another bat-squid?"
"Unlikely."
THUMP!
"Am I jinxed today or something?"
"It's a possibili-,"
THUMPTHUMP!
"This can't be good."
THUMPITATHUMPITATHUMP!
"Do we ever catch a break?"
WHUMP!
"Oh."
SHWAKITASHWAKITA-
"SHUT UP WITH THE ONOMATOPOEIAS!"
Fine, fine. Anyway…
A spray of sand arced over a nearby dune.
"What? We just went through one fight scene!"
"The Suenergy level was 8 or higher, did you think one bat-squid was all?"
"Who's talking anyway? The author hasn't really specified voices for a while!" Tash demanded.
A pair of floating mouths quietly vanished.
Tash let out a sigh of annoyance. "Better."
Cristoph raised a hand "Now that we know who was talking, does anyone know what those are?"
"What what are?"
"Those." Cristoph pointed behind Tash, who turned.
"Oh….those."
Dozens of beach-ball sized metal spheres were rolling down the side of the dune.
Tash blinked. "If I had to take a guess….I'd say they were probably robots that got around in the form of beach-ball sized metal spheres."
As each sphere reached the end of the dune, it unfolded into a robot. The robots stood about six feet high, with a single electric eye.
"Battle droids?"
"No, too dangerous-looking."
One of the robots charged forwards. "Rogerrogerrogerrogerroger…."
"Shut up!" Tyler hurled an energy blast into the robot's "Stomach." Said robot folded back into its beach ball form, and then exploded, forming a deep indent in the sand. Another of the beach ball forms rolled into the indent, launching itself into the air…
"Juari-Ken….Rinwi!" Tash slammed into the beach ball feet first, sending it flying into a group of robot forms. The resulting explosion left a patch of glass in the sand, which slipped up another two beach ball forms, sending them plowing into sand dunes.
Several meters away, Kyle stabbed the Omniweapon, currently in the form of a katana, through a gap in a robot's armor, then jumped away as the robot exploded in a massive fireball. Bits of metal stuck into nearby robots, which also exploded, although less violently. Then he ducked as another robot, in beach-ball form, went flying over his head. He turned to see Drake rubbing the back of his head.
"Sorry!"
OOOOOOO
Up on the PCMSPS ship….
"Since when do we have robots?"
"I dunno, somebody must have built them."
"Yes, but-,"
"OUT!" Retsa charged into the room, brandishing her staff.
The two floating mouths squeaked in fear and vanished again.
"We've been infested by mouths again…..ULRIC!"
The Uber-Stu came running up. "Yes?"
"Go find those mouths before they start breeding!"
"Okay." The Uber-Stu ran off.
OOOOOOOO
Back to the action…
"Die, bizarre-looking robot, die!"
"Robots can't die, Tyler."
Tyler finished swallowing the robot's head, then looked up at Drake.
"It all depends on how hard you hit them."
"No it doesn't. A robot isn't a living thing, and thus, you can't kill it."
"Whaaatever."
Drake blinked. "Oookay…. I propose a competition."
Tyler was suddenly standing up. "Hm?"
"Most enemies smashed and/or vaporized."
"You're on."
OOOOOOOOO
The fight raged on….
OOOOOOOOOO
Aster fired a blast of water at a robot, short-circuiting it.
"This is weird….why would the PCMSPS make robots when they have the Ubers?"
Valerie fired energy arrows into a group of the robots, blasting them apart.
"Maybe there was spare Suenergy, and they used it?"
Pete fired a spray of energy bullets into the robots.
"Whatever it is, they aren't very well made…"
Ben nuked a swarm of robots.
"Really? I didn't notice."
Jared Boomhammered a robot, while Chloe stabbed through the "skull," of another.
"He's right," Chloe agreed. "When I stabbed one of them, it just sort of….fell apart."
"And Ben, how would you notice if you keep nuking them?" Jared asked.
Rhia slashed one in two.
"Well, a robot that was built to be radioactivity-proof might be able to survive a nuke."
Claire and Michael cut down robot after robot.
"It would take a lot of radioactivity-proof….ness to survive an actual nuke," Michael pointed out.
"It would probably blow the PCMSPS budget." Claire continued.
Harriet smashed a robot with her cricket bat.
"They could sell that green laser. That might account for it."
Miri wedged her staff under the head of a robot before popping it off.
"I don't think selling a green laser would pay for lead coatings…especially not forty-foot-thick lead coatings…"
Terrie hurled a knife into a robot, which promptly exploded.
"Or they could just have a teleport spell built in or something…it would be a lot cheaper."
Ezra shattered the legs of several robots.
"I don't think that would be practical. Robots would be appearing out of nowhere at inconvenient times."
Danielle sent the head of a robot flying with a sharp whack.
"Yeah, like on the dinner table or in the middle of the night."
Thought Marcus opened his umbrella in the face of a robot, sending it stumbling backwards…right onto the sword of Emotion Marcus.
"Th-they could have p-p-protected them from n-nukes w-with a shielding sp-spell."
"OR A REFRIGERATOR!"
Willie blasted a robot with the Bolero of Steam.
"Maybe they just made the robots really cheaply, so they don't have to worry if a few dozen get nuked."
Kyle swung the Omniweapon as a mace, crushing a robot to bits.
"They did. We're just wondering why."
Jess jabbed one with her needle, and it fell apart.
"Maybe they have other minions, like the bat-squid."
Tyler rolled the Wall of Defense down a hill, knocking over several robots.
"27…28…29…and they do. They have the Ubers."
Drake punched the head off a robot.
"34! They also have the green laser."
Karissa swung her chain whip, ripping a gash in a robot. The robot, being shoddily made, exploded.
"What's so important about a green laser?"
Joe ripped a robot apart.
"Maybe it's a particularly dangerous green laser?"
Cristoph hurled a shuriken into a robot. The robot sparked, went dead, and fell over.
"It is. It's certainly powerful enough to fuse sand to glass, at any rate."
Ossa sliced a robot in two, and it fell apart. Ossa was turning away to deal with another robot when something caught her eye. She sliced the second robot in two, then picked a a bit of its armor that had fallen off. It was corrugated.
"Hey, everybody! These robots are made of cardboard!"
Chrys blasted a robot with desu, reducing it to rubble.
"Cardboard? Really?"
Dave swung his axe, beheading a robot.
"Well, it would explain why this fight is so boring."
Shirley lunged at Dave, who narrowly dodged her.
"Ugh! Even for you, that was bad."
Lily smashed a robot with her Ice Blow.
"Blame the author."
Alice sliced a robot to bits with her sword.
"Yes, let's do that".
Louise shot a robot.
"Or we could just ignore the whole thing."
Tom beat a robot to death with a shrubbery.
"Take that! And that! And that!"
Akai stabbed a robot with her spear.
"3…2…1…"
The robot fell apart.
OOOOOOOOOOO
Twenty minutes later…
The last robot fell to the ground, its head who-knows-where.
Jared grinned. "Well, that was easy."
"Don't say things like that!" Chloe admonished. "Do you want to fight another few thousand robots?"
Jared smirked. "You really think the author is going to bother writing another fight scene?"
"You've got a point there…"
OOOOOOOOOOOO
Elsewhere…
Sirahc frowned.
"So far, it's Society 2, Deraj's weird inventions 0. Why is he still here?"
Deraj leapt to his feet in anger.
"Like your Negatizer Magnet was any better? It was supposed to make sure there were only our Elimination Society counterparts there! Instead, we get two of the leaders!"
"And you're saying your Sue Storm device went perfectly?"
"You little-,"
Deraj was about to lunge at Sirahc when a wall of rock separated them. Retsa stood up.
"Sirahc, there was nothing wrong with the Sue Storm device. And Deraj, Sirahc made the Space Hammer cards and the Prohibitor-removal technology. I keep you two around for different reasons, and as long as those reasons exist, neither of you are leaving this ship.
OOOOOOOOOOOOO
"46! Beat that!" Tyler announced.
"52," Drake replied calmly.
"WHAT?"
OOOOOOOOOOOOOO
"Soon our Society counterparts will get here, and then they'll taste the power of our ultimate weapon!" Ekard proclaimed.
"Didn't we already have an ultimate weapon?" Relyt asked.
"What, the green laser? Please. That's old hat by now."
"Ah. And the multi-cannons?"
"Pebbles compared to our new weapon."
"The Razor-Lazor?"
"That never worked in the first place."
"True."
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
"So, if the first threat we encountered was the bat-squid…" Tash started.
"And then the robots…" Harriet continued.
"Crack logic dictates that the next threat will be the Ubers, and hence the PCMSPS Agents themselves!"
The Society let out a loud cheer.
"However, as it required about a mile of walking between the bat-squid and the robots, we think it will be about twice that to get to the PCMSPS!" Harriet yelled.
The Society let out a loud groan.
"Just kidding!" Tash confirmed.
The Society let out a loud sigh of relief.
This could have gone on all day, or at least until the author ran out of synonyms for "said," but it was interrupted by a massive shadow that enveloped all the Society members, and the humming that precedes spaceship landings in all good sci-fi movies. The Society scattered to avoid being crushed by the rapidly descending PCMSPS ship. However, instead of landing, the ship released dozens of Uber pods, quickly followed by the PCMSPS members parachuting down to join them.
"Well….that was a lot shorter than a mile," Harriet mumbled.
Retsa sliced off her parachute, then formed a fireball in her hand, pointing it at various Society Agents.
"Well well well. Society, we meet again."
"Quit ripping off old lines and let's get to the fight scene!"
Harriet frowned. "Okay, who said that?"
"They did," responded Karissa, pointing at the mouths, who had appeared out of nowhere.
For the first and last time in all of recorded history, a ACMSES member and a PCMSPS member worked together. Both Tash and Retsa launched a blast of fire at the mouths, incinerating them instantly.
Retsa smirked. "The first shots have been fired. Let the battle begin."
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Couple quick and random brownie point questions:
-Something was weird about the line breaks. Anyone who wishes to try and guess may, as is customary for brownie point questions.
-The last chapter's title was based off "The Taming of the Shrew." This chapter's title was also based off a Shakespeare play? Which one?
Next chapter coming hopefully quicker than this one.