Three

Rage of Innocence

Any by passer who took a look at the great, white Mansion in Windmill, would think its inhabitants were blessed people. As the orange glow surrounded its walls, giving it a magnificent glow to match the flowerbeds it was surrounded by, the Mansion was quite something to envy. Come to think of what may rest beyond those protective walls, your imagination might take leaps at guessing.

Yes, the Mansion was envied, no doubt about that, but one should know never to judge on the outside. Since the dearest companion of a perfect housewife, could very well be a glass of champagne, rather than her husband.

It had been quite some time since Isabella had seen Marcus and Loïs engage in polite conversation, let alone be affectionate with each other. Marcus spent his days in his study, he taught Isabella and Alice there too. He couldn't imagine his daughters missing out on proper education, much to the dismay of Alice, who preferred to spend her precious time running off from one place to the other while dragging Isabella along with her. Isabella on the other hand loved to learn, she was fascinated by the books they got to read from Marcus. Her curiosity for knowledge was endless.

Loïs on the other hand, kept herself busy by engaging in social activity constantly. Apart from that, she was the perfect housewife. Isabella could never find a single flaw in her manners. There was no dust to be found even under the darkest of places. What Isabella could see however, was the way Loïs and Marcus kept apart from each other.

When one occupied a room, the other seemed to be repelled from coming near it. It worried her, it reminded her of the disaster that it might lead to. That scared, little girl inside of her would always worry endlessly; was she the cause of this unsettling behaviour between these people? Was this her punishment for being such an awful person?

Worrying seemed to be all she did these days, she thought sadly. The only person unaffected seemed to be Alice, who lived on merrily, unaware of whatever happened around her. The only thing she busied herself with was the next mischievous plan she could get Bella involved in.

Oh yes, Bella had to be involved at all times. Alice wouldn't think of going anywhere or doing anything without Bella there with her. And poor Bella couldn't possibly think of ever rejecting anything coming out of the mouth of Alice. They were partners in crime after all, as Alice would always say whenever Bella got hesitant.

On this particular Friday afternoon, as they were both present in the study to be taught by Marcus, Bella felt.. Distracted. She hadn't been able to place the feelings she had for Alice, and felt confused about what to make of them. It was very unlike her to be paying this little attention though, since that was usually Alices' job. Isabella was the one who couldn't not pay attention.

Marcus had been talking endlessly about some book he was very passionate about, its' name Isabella couldn't recall, since she was too caught up in her own thoughts. She sighed, gazing out of the window.

The study was quite large, a room in a T shape where the upper horizontal line was a higher floor than the lower vertical part of the T. Once you went up the five steps it took to enter the horizontal part of the room, you were in front of Marcus' desk. The walls were hidden behind countless shelves filled with books. Books about everything one could imagine, from the works of Shakespeare to quite serious books describing the use of medicine, or simply a romance to read in order to kill a few hours. The carpet was coloured red, the tint of blood and blended quite nicely with the mahogany floors. The dark, red curtains that kept the bright, blinding sunlight from disturbing the gloomy darkness of the study, were usually closed by Marcus. However, on this particular day he chose to leave them open. The candles that were spread throughout the study weren't lit either, giving the impression that dear Marcus was having a good day.

Isabella used this opportunity to stare at the endless green that surrounded the Mansion. The sky wasn't cloudless today, which she was thankful for. A spotless sky only filled with the warm, cheery sunrays didn't quite fit her mood today. She stared at the lone bird that flew by, seemingly deciding to make whatever journey he was going on, all alone.

When Isabella became aware of the present again, she saw that nothing had really changed. Alice was still looking as if this was the last place she'd ever choose to be. Marcus had stopped talking however.

"That was it for today, we'll continue this some other time. You girls are free to go as you please."

Alice flew out of the study in a heartbeat while Isabella on the other hand, slowly walked towards the door, while glancing at the books she came across.

One book in particular caught her attention.

"Age of Innocence, Edith Wharton" it read.

"You can take any book you'd like, I've noticed you're very eager to learn. I think you'll be able to read literature without much difficulties. Just remember to bring it back unharmed." Marcus said smiling at her.

Isabella took out the book carefully before nodding her head and mumbling a "thank you".

She entered the bedroom she shared with Alice, and laid the book on her pillow. The Egyptian cotton sheets looked so harmless, it was almost hard to believe she had such awful dreams while she was covered by them. Dreams about her friend, her sister, Alice.. It was curious to Isabella, how attached she was to Alice, even though she had promised herself from the day Charlie told her he was sending her away, that she would never let herself get close to anyone ever again. After all, if she hadn't hurt them, every person she loved had hurt her. But with Alice, things were different. She found a way into her heart and for Isabella it seemed there was no stopping it. It was as if her heart had known about Alice all along, and had kept her a spot, knowing she would fill it someday. Everything was so easy when it came to Alice. She was the only one who could take away her pain by just smiling at Bella.

She soon found the girl in question when she walked out on the balcony. Alice was leaning on the marble, staring into the distance ahead of her. It wasn't often that Isabella saw her friend being this serious.

"What are you thinking of?" She softly asked her while coming closer to stand next to her. As she looked at the grassy fields, covered with flowers here and there, a lake in the far distance and all the way to the left, the beach was visible. When they were outside together, this place was their own single piece of heaven. No one could touch it, or them for that matter. They had been spending many and many days out there doing whatever it was they pleased. Rolling off the hills, swimming in the lake, plucking flowers and even attempting to catch rabbits, although that had been less of a success.

But sometimes, they would just lay in the grass, silent and content. No words were spoken, the only sound was the sound of their breathing. At times like those, Isabella felt so lightweight. So carefree, as if that unbearable weight she carried with her everyday, had been nothing but an overestimated feather and the light breeze blowing over them would soon take it away.

"I'm just wondering.." Alice took a deep sigh before continuing. "If I'll ever find someone who's going to want to have me."

"You have no idea." Bella thought. "You have no idea how badly I long for you, every single moment of every day. Even when you're ashamed, because you don't know the answer to your fathers' questions about literature or when your eyes are still filled with sleep in the morning when you wake up. I'll always long for you.. But how could I ever say something like this out loud?"

"I hate to see you this sad." Bella said, a sad expression marring her beautiful face.

"Oh Bella.. You know I'd never upset you on purpose, you're my best friend.. You're like a sister to me." Alice said, a small smile playing on her lips. "Don't feel bad just because I'm worrying about nonsense."

It seemed as if her heart had decided to take over, and forced Bella to be silent about Alice's thoughts. It wouldn't allow for Bella to tell Alice how everything was going to be okay, that some day she would meet the right man, the man who would long for her, love her and care for her.

Just the thought of it was painful enough for Isabella to believe it would shatter her to speak those thoughts out loud.

After dinner Isabella had gone upstairs to read the book she had taken from the study. Alice hadn't gone with her and Isabella was grateful for the few moments she had to herself. She absolutely adored her friend but along with her presence came the need to always be closer to her, the emptiness Isabella thought would never fill, and it weighed down on her. With that thought she opened the book and started reading at the first page.

Hours later, after Alice had entered the room and had fallen fast asleep, Isabella still hadn't gotten out of the books grip.

The novel was about a forbidden romance, and the heartbreak that came with it. Along with moments of passion and love, of the feeling that the object of your affection, the person you want most is just out of reach and you can do nothing but crave it, long for it, pine for it, but you will never have it in the end.

Halfway through the story something caught her attention in particular.

"From the very beginning, I felt there was no one as kind as you; no one who gave me reasons that I understood for doing what at first seemed so hard and unnecessary. The very good people didn't convince me; I felt they'd never been tempted. But you knew; you understood; you had felt the world outside tugging at one with all its golden hands - and yet you hated the things it asks of one; you hated happiness bought by disloyalty and cruelty and indifference. That was what I'd never known before -and it's better than anything I've ever known."

The desperation and love, the hope put into that single piece of text. It was almost like art, it was love put into words, and it touched Isabella. She could imagine herself feeling Newlands' pain, how much he wanted to be with the Countess Olenska, how badly he wanted to let everything behind him and spend his life with her, the one person he loved most.

She felt the same way about Alice. Isabella had opened up to her, Alice had given her hope, changed her views on humanity. She couldn't fathom how she had ever been able to live without Alice in her life, or how she would fare without her ever again. Alice had touched her inside of her cage, and it made her want to spread her wings and fly off, never looking back at the past again.

Suddenly, something struck her. These feelings she had for Alice, this affection.. It was love. She was in love with Alice. Her best friend, the girl who saw her as her sister.

If Alice ever found out.. If anyone ever found out, they'd hate her, what she felt couldn't be natural, she wasn't allowed to feel this way! But what could she do? Except for stay away from the cause of her feelings, of the person she loved most..

She was surprised to find a stain on the page she had been reading as she looked down again, she couldn't remember seeing it before. She touched her cheek; to find another tear making its way across it.

And so it seemed, one should never judge a book by its cover. If a Mansion this beautiful could carry so much ugliness inside, who says an ugly book could not carry the greatest romance of all?

That's it for Chapter Three, hope you enjoyed it.

I have to say though, the number of reviews are a let down to say the least, more than 90 story alerts and only 10 reviews? I don't mean to push or beg or anything, but I would love to know whether people are enjoying my story or would like to see changes or just give me some feedback. J

XO