Chapter 23

The elevator ride seemed to take forever. There were some paper airplanes circling above. It really wasn't good security practice. Anyone could grab them and read. She mused over the abstract thought at a time like this.

She had to give into the itching and started scratching her arms, but had to stop as the lift stopped somewhere it wasn't supposed to. Her breath hitched as the door began to open, only to reveal some harried Ministry worker with their arms full of rolled up scrolls. Hermione suppressed the itching and stared intently on the floor.

To Hermione's horror the itching was beginning to recede which indicated that the effects of the Ugly Toffees were wearing off. That meant she was exposed if anyone she knew came across her. She hid her face in her hair as the elevator ride went on.

As the life doors opened for her, she had a quick look outside before stepping out. The corridor was dark, obviously the Office for Muggleborn Affairs was in some less desirable part of the Ministry.

Maybe it was time to take the other toffee, just to be safe. She reached into the pocket and panicked when she didn't find it. She searched all of her pockets and it was gone. Fuck!

It must have fallen out somewhere along the way. Hermione felt completely exposed without the relative security of her disguise. Now that her safe passage to her new life was in jeopardy, she felt it keenly. No, no, no, I will not lose. I will not lose this.

She took a mental hold of herself and told herself to use her brain. She knew she had a formative one, so now it was time to use it. No good will come of giving into panic.

Without a doubt, Draco had placed someone up here. She would have and she had learnt not to underestimate him. He was a complete prat, but he wasn't stupid.

Hermione walked as quietly as she could along the corridor and her heart literally skipped a beat when someone walked around the corner.

It was Percy Weasley, who looked surprised when he saw her.

"Her.." He started, but Hermione stopped him with a hard look and a finger to her lips.

Percy looked at her suspiciously, then around them.

"What are you doing?" He continued in a quieter voice in a manner that told her he taught she might be unhinged.

"I am going to register for release."

"Release, are you being held in capacity?"

"Into the muggle world." She said and got a surprised expression from Percy.

"Why?" He asked like she had just suggested the most outrageous thing ever. "You do know that it is a permanent change, don't you? You will not be able to come back." He said pronounciating each world like she was an imbecile.

"I know that Percy." She said.

"But you won't be able to do magic." He continued. "Surely you can't be considering giving that up."

"I really don't have a choice, Percy."

"Nonsense." He snorted. "That is a bit melodramatic. I am sure. I can imagine that being servant isn't the ideal, but its a decent living. Much better than could be, I had heard you were earning your living in less respectable ways." He said if he was sharing something amusing.

"I am treated less than human, Percy."

"Nonsense." He repeated.

"I'm not allowed to marry, Percy."

"Its only a piece of paper, there are no restrictions on who you see in a personal capacity."

"I'm not allowed to have children, Percy."

"Well," he started, but seemed unable to find an easy justification, "it was better that... that there weren't a whole bunch of children running around that didn't have a stable home environment."

"That's a circular argument justifying your prejudice."

"I'm not prejudice." Percy stated, offended.

"If you say so, Percy." Hermione said. "Anyway, I was hoping to keep my intentions fairly quiet."

"That is understandable considering the silly decision you've made." He said. "So sneaking away like a thief with the family silver." He said with a chuckle and Hermione mused on how completely inappropriate he was.

"I would prefer that no one see me." Hermione said and she knew that Percy thought she was embarrassed about what she was doing. Part of her wanted to argue with him until he understood her position, but another just couldn't be bothered. Hopefully in half an hour, she wouldn't even know who he or his ludicrous prejudices were.

"Did you see anyone down that way?" She followed.

"Ah... Yes, I saw Blaise Zabini."

"Oh." Hermione said trying to sound surprised.

"And you don't want him to see you?"

"No." She said. "Well for someone in my position, it would be embarrassing to do something like this in front of a Slytherin from my year. Slytherins seeing Gryffindor piking out. Hurts the cause, you understand."

"Yes. I suppose. Old school rivalries die hard." He said tapping his chin. "He works at Gringotts you know."

"Really?" Hermione asked pretending to be interested in something she already knew.

"I suppose I could distract him a bit while you sneak past if you are sure about doing such a ridiculous thing."

"Would you, I would be ever so grateful." Hermione said holding her breath. "You know us mudbloods, never truly settle." She said through gritted teeth as he watched him accept her reasoning.

"Well if you insist." He said with a flourish. "Couldn't refuse an old housemate a favour, could I?"

"I'd owe you one."

"You won't remember." He said with a cheery laugh.

"True, true. But you know now that I would be grateful if I knew."

"Alright let me see what I can do." He said and winked conspiratorially before he walked around the corner.

Wanker, she thought as she watched him walk away. She gave it a minute then followed towards the corner. When she peaked around the corner, she could see Blaise and Percy deep in discussion. Come on Percy, she said quietly to herself, for once in your life make yourself useful.

Percy started to walk away with a big wave telling Blaise to follow him. Blaise looked uncertain, trying to decide what to do, but finally decided to follow Percy.

Whatever wrongs you have done, Percy, I forgive you, she said as she started running as quietly as she could towards the wooden doors of the Muggleborn Affairs office. Her heart was pounding out of her chest with anxiety and adrenalin.

Only a few more steps and she would be there. To her complete surprise there was no tug on her arm, no commotion, just silence. Silence as she took the handle and opened the door. Silence as she slipped in and closed the door behind her.

The middle aged woman looked up from her desk as she entered the office.

"Yes?" She said as she took in Hermione's appearance.

"I am here to go into the muggle world." Hermione said.

The woman didn't look surprised. "Name?"

"Hermione Granger."

The woman wrote the name down and then opened a book to search for something.

"Hermione Jane Granger?"

"Yes."

"Have you got any ID?"

"No." Hermione said with a sinking feeling. "I don't have anything. I have a passport, but its at my parents place. It probably burnt when the house burned a few years back."

The woman eyes her wearily, "You are supposed to carry ID at all times." She said and pinned Hermione with her eyes like only bureaucrats can. Finally she sighed, "Nevermind, just sign here, then you can go through. I'll take care of the rest of the paperwork."

The woman said and pointed her to a plain door off to the side of the department reception. It was a door like any other door at the Ministry. Hermione signed the paper held for her on the desk, not bothering to read it.

Hermione felt a pause as she looked at the door. This was really happening. Some part of her never believed that she would get here. A waves of emotions were flooding her now.

"That one?" Hermione said pointing at the only door there.

"Yes." The woman said and returned her attention to something on her desk.

Hermione took a step towards the door, waiting for something to happen, but it didn't. If this wasn't meant to happen, something would stop it, but there was nothing. Just dead silence broken by the receptionist turning the page of what sounded like a magazine. Somehow she had expected a bit more. This was a big deal after all, erasing her whole magical life.

The handle didn't burn her, it slipped easily open under her grip. There was a brightly lit corridor inside. Walking down Hermione felt detached from her body and from reality.

This was a big deal she told herself. It would leave all the badness behind and free her. It would also leave the good behind. Harry, Neville, Luna and all the good memories. She wouldn't remember any of them. She wouldn't remember their adventures, all the hours she spent learning, her amazement at magic's existence.

But she didn't belong in this world. That was clear to her now. That is not to say that things hadn't been different before Harry died and that the potential of this world to be so much more. But they had made it into a place she didn't belong and to a place she didn't want to belong.

She kept walking down the hall until she reached a space to the side.

"Hello." Said a middle-aged wizard holding an empty cup of tea. "Are you here to a memory augmentation?"

Hermione nodded.

"I was just going to have a cup of tea." He said and held his cup up. "But it can wait I suppose."

With a friendly smile he waved her towards another door. "It doesn't due to make people wait." He said. "People are pretty nervous and its better if they don't have to wait."

Hermione nodded. They will likely start thinking, she thought, and no one wants to think about something like this.

"Are you sure you want to do this? Miss...?"

"Granger, Hermione Granger." She said. She liked this man. Obviously a medical man of some capacity. Kind face accented by a graying comb over.

"You don't have to, you know." He said.

"I'm sure." Hermione said lifting her chin in the air.

"Well, come through then." He said and held the door for her. "Have a seat."

Hermione sat down in the small chair he pointed to, which wasn't the larger procedure chair which reminded her of her parents' dental chairs.

"Now, the process is that you will need to change to muggle clothes, then we will do the augmentation. It is a permanent procedure, it cannot be undone afterwards." He said with a serious look.

"Will it hurt?"

"No, you will be sedated. The procedure will take around forty minutes."

"What will I know after? Will I forget everything?"

"You will know who you are and all your life in the muggle world. It is a very sophisticated procedure. You just will not remember anything about your time in this world, any persons or knowledge of magical things."

"Will I think I am eleven?"

"No. Typically subjects are aware of their age and are emotionally at their appropriate ages. You will have some knowledge, but you will not remember how you got it if it was gained in the magical realm. We have done this a few times and it does go fairly smoothly." He said smiling reassuringly. "I haven't observed any subjects with really strong distress afterwards. The mind is an amazing thing and it seems to accept the augmentation fairly well."

"You don't have to go through with it if you don't want to. You can take some time to think about it."

"No." Hermione said immediately. "I want to do it. Now."

"Alright then, well go through in there and change into any clothes you feel comfortable in."

She walked into the door, which was a large closet full of clothes of all types. Muggle clothes. There were all sorts of sizes and it took a bit of digging before she found a pair of jeans that fit. She pulled off the servant's dress Ron had given her and pulled the jeans on. Followed by a turquoise sweater she grabbed of a pile. Not her colour but it would do. The other wall had shelf full of shoes. They looked used. She wondered where they got these clothes from. She grabbed a pair of trainers that looked like they might fit and they were good enough. Not the time to worry about perfect fit. She was still at risk after all. Somehow she wouldn't put it past Draco to abduct her from here.

It was actually really nice to wear muggle clothes. It had been so long. Kind of like acknowledging a part of her she had been forced to suppress. Why can't they just accept that you can belong to both worlds, she wondered. What exactly was the harm?

It didn't matter, the magical world she loved was gone. Long gone and in its place was something dark and twisted. She wasn't having second thoughts. She knew in her bones this was the right decision. That didn't make this any less hard.

She tried to sooth her hair down and stepped outside of this closet. The kind medical man was there waiting for her. His wand was sitting on the table next to her. The implement of his procedure.

"Are you ready?" He said with professionally cheery regard.

She nodded, but it was a little stiff. This is it. The last moment in the magical world. She was kind of glad that her last conversation was with a stranger, who was for all intents and purposes reasonably normal. It kind of took the sting out of it. It would have been harder to swallow if her last conversation had been with Percy.

Right, time to move, Hermione told herself. The man indicated that she sit in the procedure chair and Hermione felt a wave of panic. It did feel like she was having an arm cut off and it wasn't a bad analogy. A bad arm that had gone septic. It had to go, but it was still hard. It was a huge thing and she was letting this perfect stranger cut into her, her brain in this instance. This man she didn't know, cut into her memories, her life. She wondered if he would know all her secrets.

She forced herself to comply and went over to sit in the chair. She was shaking.

"Now I am going to sedate you." He said. "And then I will start the augmentation."

Hermione nodded again, but it came across as a small jerk. Try as she might, she couldn't stop the tremor in her body, but the man had obviously seen it before.

She was aware that he was turning to pick up his wand. Memories that wanted acknowledgement stole into her brain. Her, Harry and Ron sitting in the Great Hall, sitting on the Hogwarts Express. Dancing with Victor at the Yule Ball. Laughing in the common room. Training in the Room of Requirements. Draco holding her.

She dismissed that train outright. She watching in slow motion as the man brought his wand up to her head. She was utterly terrified.

Harry, she called in her mind for him to help her. She intently focused on her memory of his face. Maybe if she focused hard enough, it would stick. She loved him, surely love can't be erased. She focused everything she had on Harry's emerald eyes before a wave of nausea hit, then complete nothingness.